


Gabriel Fucking Reyes

by hostilewitness



Series: JFM & GFR [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Gore, Dry Humping, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Lovers To Enemies, Moral Dilemmas, Pining, Porn With Plot, Semi-Public Sex, Teasing, Torture, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-26
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2019-11-04 03:37:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 122,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17890760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hostilewitness/pseuds/hostilewitness
Summary: [AU of Jack Fucking Morrison] You've been with Morrison for a while now, but a choice is made and there's no turning back when you decide your work is more important than your relationship. It's going to get messy, it's going to be dangerous, and it's going to be a ride.





	1. This Is Going To Hurt

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to The Split™, you've chose: Gabriel Reyes  
> ***This is not a stand alone, this story is an AU of my other fic Jack Fucking Morrison***  
> [JFM](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16642748/chapters/39019631)  
> is my main story that leads up to the split in chapter 34 where the reader is faced with a decision to choose between either continuing the story with Jack or turning her back on him and going with Gabe. If you have not read that please know there is a lot of context in that story that I will be referring to in this one! <3

“I’m sorry, Jack.” You turned to look at your blond commander dressed in casual clothes and a look of absolute betrayal crossed his face. He lifted his lips in disgust as his head reeled back. 

“You can’t be serious?” Fingers gripped into the side of his jeans. “We’ve talked about this. You know how important this is to me.”

“I’m sorry.” This hurt deep in your chest and your words were choking out. “If there’s a chance we can catch Tishler, I need to take it. We have to go.”

This was it. The final rose. Even though you told Morrison you'd leave with him, you couldn't abandon everything you'd done to get to this point now. Gabe placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder, but you couldn’t rip your eyes from the icy blues. This hurt more than you thought it would.

“I’m leaving without you then.” Morrison clenched his jaw.

"Go, Jack." Gabe said, digging fingers into you. "She's right. She can make her own decisions and this is what she's choosing to do. I'm sure you two can make it out to Indiana together some other time." 

"I'm not so sure about that." Morrison's face was stoic, voice tense as he calmly climbed into the car and gave you one last pleading look to join him. You stepped forward with something to say, hand reached out in front of you, but recoiled as he shook his head and the car started down the lane of the parking garage. 

You stood in the settling quiet with Gabe's hand on your shoulder until the sound of the car was long gone. He slowly held the rose to you, little white card open and you stared at it then back at him in question. 

"It's blank?" 

"I'm not sure what it means, but nothing else came with it." Gabe said, pulling his beanie back over his head. "We have two agents on his trail right now, he's driving through a nearby city and seems to be in a heavily armored vehicle. They spotted him landing in a private airport, I think we can catch him if we make it out to his plane and confront him there." 

"We should take every available agent. We're not taking him down alone." You were stretching your neck, picking your bag up off the ground and slinging it over your shoulder as you fast walked with him back into the elevators. "We should use the heavy armor, too. We know he's willing to kill and I don't want to leave anything to chance." 

"Already taken care of." He smirked and showed you his phone, an alert sent out before you even agreed to his plan to have all Blackwatch agents meet at the private airfield and ready for an attack on the Talon leader. "Agents are already moving out. We're going to get this bastard."

* * *

 

The concept of choice is a funny thing. You can choose between love or loyalty. You can choose to take a life or to spare it. You can choose to ignore longing looks from friends who damaged you and who you damaged in return. Choice is something that sounds nice, but choice doesn't necessarily mean you will avoid the inevitable. Your choice was unexpected, to Tishler at least. 

As you armored up with Gabe you couldn't help but feel like your choice left you empty inside. 

“He knows something’s wrong, I can’t help but feel like this might hurt him more than I think.” You chewed at your lip. 

“Jack will survive, he knows you have a job to do.”

You stayed quiet. Nails digging into cuticles as he brought his armor over his chest. You could see the sideways look he was giving you, questioning what you were thinking.

“He asked if you and me were sleeping together.” You said quietly and Gabe coughed in suprise.

“What-” More clearing of his throat, was he nervous? “What did you tell him?”

“The truth?” You responded almost accusatory. "I don't know how much longer I can keep everything else from him. It's killing me, Gabe." 

"I don't want to sound like a hard ass, but I need you to toughen up. I know it sucks right now, but we need to focus and get this done. We can worry about telling him the truth once we have Tishler behind bars." 

As you, and what was left of the Blackwatch team, closed in on a plane hanger, somewhere deep in the city streets Tishler's armored car was slamming into the side of Morrison's self driving one. Unknown to you at the time, they were cutting open the roof with the jaws of life, ripping away metal only to find the passenger seat empty and the strike commander quickly passing out from knocking his head around. The agents tailing Tishler frantically tried to call you and Gabe for help, they tried to stop Tishler and his goons from getting away, but saving the commander quickly became a priority when what Talon wanted clearly wasn't there and they left the poster boy to dangle sideways and injured from a seat belt in a wreckage. As soon as Blackwatch got the news the strike commander was down and it was because of Tishler, the mission was off. All vehicles were turned around and ordered back to base. 

Gabe couldn't talk.You were too in your head to even try to make sense of Talon causing, _of all things,_ a car accident. Instead of speaking, you gripped into Gabe's arm, digging nails in probably harder than you should have, trying desperately not to break down in front of other agents, trying and failing to hide how absolutely guilt ridden you were that Morrison was in an accident and you should have been with him.

You didn't even wait for the car to power down when it was coming to a stop back on base. You never ran so fast in your life. You didn't even care that people would wonder how you were so quick, you tore through the campus to the medical building and burst into Morrison's room a panting and red faced mess of worry. 

He smiled when he saw you. Morrison smiled beneath a bruised face and bandages on the side of his head. His arm was wrapped in a temporary cast, skin riddled with little cuts from rouge shards of glass scraping across it. You sat on the edge of his bed and held his hand as you tried not to cry because he just looked so _bad_ and you never expected a super solider could look like that. 

"He was looking for you." Morrison choked out. "Someone here knows we were going to Indiana and  knew you would have been with me." He squeezed at your fingers. "I'm so happy you weren't there. I wouldn't have been able to stop them. They would have taken you." 

You stayed with him that night. Curled against his warm body in the tiny medical wing bed. Every now and then he would shift and groan in pain and it just killed you that you weren't with him when it happened, but you couldn't even begin to imagine what Tishler's plan was if you _had_ been there.

You stayed under the blanket with him, head on his chest until the sun was creeping through the window with harsh yellow light and hard knuckles were tapping on the door. 

"Hey, Gabe." You heard Jack's voice rumble through his chest. You kept your eyes closed, your back was to the door and you weren't quite ready to wake up and face reality just yet. 

"How are you feeling?" 

"Terrible. Ziegler says I should thank my stars for SEP, otherwise I would have been practically dead. Guess that stuff was good for something." His arm gripped at your waist and held you tighter to him. "But, she says I should be okay for release later today. Luckily nothing too bad other than a concussion and a broken arm." 

"I'm happy to hear it's not as bad as it could have been." You heard Gabe taking a few steps closer. You stirred and lifted your face to look at Morrison. 

"Good morning." He kissed your forehead. "Sorry if I woke you." 

"It's alright. What brings you here so early Gabe?" You twisted in the bed to face him, Morrison's arm draping around you still. 

"It's Tishler. My office phone has been ringing non stop since yesterday, when I pick it up he only says he'll speak to you." He looked guilty. Guilty for dragging you into this mess. Guilty for dragging you away from Morrison again. Guilty for everything. 

You looked to your commander. His blue eyes begged you silently not to go, pleading for you to stay tucked against him in the bed. You looked in his glossy eyes and still that couldn't stop you from slipping out of the edge of the bed and to Gabe's side. You held your arms close to you, hugging your own body and wishing you didn't feel so guilty about leaving, but you gave Morrison a small smile before turning to leave with the Blackwatch commander. 

* * *

You were Gabe's office all day nervously sitting by the phone doing last minute paperwork and going over agents schedules while you waited for Tishler to call again. Something wasn't sitting right in your stomach. The way Morrison looked at you, the way he watched you with eyes that shifted from hurt to acceptance made your chest tighten.

Gabe was no help. Things were still weird between you both, he was still angry you lied to him about what you were doing with Moira, you were mad at him for asking you to follow through with his promise.

You wished you could talk to Jesse. Jesse would joke with you, but would talk some sense and be real about how fucked up things were. The day seemed to fly by, you spent a long time staring at the same report- not reading it- just wondering where Jesse was and what he was doing now that he was out of Blackwatch. You hoped he didn't go back home to New Mexico, not to route 66 where the Deadlock were, where he could fall right back into the same habits that got him caught in the claws of the law in the first place. You wondered where Genji had wandered off to and if the head doctor knew where he was. 

Gabe said your name, but you didn't hear. He said it again, louder and angrier and you snapped the report down.

_"What?"_   You scowled. 

"Let's just call it for the night. I'll forward my phone to the cell, if he calls I'll come get you okay?" 

You checked the clock, somehow time had escaped you and you'd been in his office until almost 10pm. Morrison should be back in the room by now. You tapped Gabe's desk and nodded as you brought your stiff body up from the chair and left for the barracks. There was an overwhelming sense of dread as you walked across the base. You walked slower than usual as Gabe raised an eyebrow at you, but stayed silent in his questioning. The dread lasted as you rode with Gabe in the mirrored elevator, he saw the worried look in your eyes and tried to comfort you with a squeeze to your shoulder. He got off on his floor and as soon as you were alone and faced with your own reflection the sinking feeling swallowed you whole. Part of you must have known what was coming.  

You slowly punched in Morrison's key code and it beeped in red back at you. You furrowed your brows and put the numbers in again, and again, and again, only to be denied again and again. You caught your breath when the door slowly slid open, Morrison was dressed in his damn gray sweatpants that you used to love, and a sling over his arm. Your things were in neat piles stacked on his kitchen counter and you couldn't help but catch the sent of bourbon on his breath.

“Jack?” Your voice broke.

“Just tell me the truth, please.” You’d seen him at his worst, but this, this was the absolute worst he’d ever looked and it wasn't just because of the bruising on his face. “What is going on between you and Gabe? What have you two really been doing on those missions?”

You stared at him. Where do you start? With the smoke? With a strangling, or a needle in your veins that bound you to Gabe for life?

You’ve been silent for too long. He fell heavy against his kitchen counter, his hand resting on your neatly folded clothes.

“I asked for no more secrets. I asked that you tell me everything and you can’t even do that. How can you say you love me when you’re not being honest with me? We’re supposed to share our lives together.”

“I-” Your secrets were Gabe’s too. Maybe a long time ago this would be easier, sharing the truth would have just resulted in broken trust, but now? Now, if you shared what Gabe was, what he was doing, it wasn’t just trust that was broken. It was the law. Morrison would know he was Reaper. He would know you’ve been _helping_ Reaper. Your heart skipped a beat and you clammed up.  

“You already told me you’ve been infiltrating Talon, how much worse could it get?”

So much worse.

"Say something! Tell me anything! Please, I'm begging you!" Morrison was at you in a flash, he grabbed the side of your arm and shook as you sputtered out that there was nothing you could say. 

Arguments between lovers tend to go in circles. They know each other so intimately and so deeply that there are some things better left unmentioned from fights that could only lead to one end. You and Jack went back and forth, him begging you to tell him everything, begging for you to think back to how things used to be and how happy you were even when you were separated from each other. Some arguments can last minutes, but this one was fighting for hours. The same arguments with different words, all leading up to what you both knew was the inevitable.    

“Then I’ll ask you again, have you been sleeping with him?” He was frowning, leaning his face forward to be at your level and look you straight in the eyes.

“I never cheated on you, honestly Jack.”

He stared at you and searched your face. That was the only thing you could own up to. That was the only thing you could be honest about. That was all you could give. When you stayed still and silent he tightened his lips and shook his head, eyes searching the ceiling for some kind of anwser. 

“Maybe you should have. Then maybe this would be easier.” He sighed and ran his hands over his face and into his hair. Ouch. You clutched a hand to your stomach and bit at the inside of your lip. “If you’re not going to tell me everything about your missions, about your late night training sessions, about why you're not going where you say you are- If you can't tell me any of this right now, I want you out.”

Your breath caught in your throat again. Jesse. Jesse must have said something to him. 

"Did you think I wouldn't realize something was wrong? You're the only person in the whole damn organization that wants to be around Gabe right now and I need to know why." 

“Can’t you just trust me?” You begged, already knowing that was the wrong thing to say.

“Trust you? Are you kidding me? I’ve tried to give you space. I’ve tried to be supportive of all of your choices, even working with Blackwatch and even after the shit you pulled by going to Null Sector. I’ve done nothing _but_ trust you, unquestionably! I’m done. I can’t waste my time worrying about you every second of every day, not when everything else is stressing me out too.”

“So, what, Jack? You’re done with me just because I won’t tell you every little detail about my missions with Gabe?”

“I’m done because you’re not honest with me, about anything! I’m giving you the chance, right now, to tell me everything. It's like you don't care anymore. Please, sweetheart, convince me we’re worth pulling through this because I don’t think your heart has been here for a while.”

You shuddered a breath in your chest. Morrison was a warm and happy place to come back to, arms that you could sleep in that would make you feel safe for a few hours before you rushed back into the field for days. He was comforting, but something was missing. The way you looked at him before was like he was glowing and now he seemed dulled with the sinking reality that maybe not all love is meant to last.

“Maybe you’re right.” You said quietly and looking at your feet and you heard him catch his breath. “Maybe it would be better if I was on my own. We could just go back to being a commander and a captain. You do your job, I’ll do mine, and we’ll just let what happened between us be a nice memory.” Shit. Don’t cry. A lump was caught in your throat.

“You’re not willing to fight for this?” He said through a cold laugh. "After everything we've been through these last few years, you can't even explain yourself?" 

“I-” Your eyes were watering. “I guess not. I’m sorry, Jack. I don’t want things to go back to how they were before because I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. But I’m not-” Could you even bring yourself to say it? “ _Fuck,_  I hate this. I love you so much and I know it's selfish to ask you to trust me blindly-”

“Just go.” His face was buried in his hands.

“Jack-”

“I don’t want you here, leave!” He stood and spun on his heels facing away from you. You could see he was trying not to shake, that his back was tensing with every controlled breath. “It’s over. Please, just get out. I'll have someone bring your stuff down later.”

"That's it? This is how we're ending things?" That's where you broke. You tried to hide that you were crying behind your hand but there was no hiding the way your voice caught. 

"If this is how you're going to be, then yes! Do you understand how much this fucking hurts me? I was going to spend my life with you. We were going to live on the farm and grow old and joke about how we used to hate each other but instead you'd rather hurt my feelings and keep secrets, so yeah, this is how we're ending things. Go have fun chasing after Tishler and putting yourself in danger, because I'm _done_ and I won't be laying here at night worrying about you anymore. Go look for someone else to pull along while they wait around for you to be honest with them." 

"I'm sorry, Jack. You-you've been nothing but good to me-" You were gasping as you cried. "You've been so good to me and I never deserved you-" 

"Don't say that." He was pinching hard at the bridge of his nose. "You've just lost yourself. I hope one day things can be better between us, because all I want to do right now is hold you and tell you we can work through this, but I can't. If you won't talk to me I can't be the one that tells you everything is going to be okay when I know it isn't." 

You were a blubbering mess. It was so painfully clear he was still in love with you, it was so clear on his face and in the way he was curled in on himself how much it was physically hurting him to stop himself from trying to hold you right now. 

"I'll give you some space." You whimpered out as your shoulder leaned back onto his door and your hand reached for the latch. You opened the door and he averted watery eyes away from you, staring at his small kitchen table as he chewed his cheek. You opened your mouth to say something else but he made a noise, a deep groan from in his chest that told you he didn't want you here a second longer. 

As soon as his door closed behind you and you were faced with the fluorescent lights of the hallway you were left shaken and with tears streaming down your face. It shouldn’t have hurt this much. You were the one keeping secrets. You were the one falling out of love. You were the one doing this to him but it hurt so fucking bad. You could hear him in there. Just beyond the door finally releasing sobs that he'd held back to save face with you. 

You didn't want to think about that. Instead, you slowly made your way down the stairwell at the end of the hall, three floors down the captain's hall and you wondered your way to your now barren room. It wasn't the missing clothes or the missing knickknacks that made it feel empty, it was you and everything you'd done to get to to this point and all you could do was lay down in a bed with standard issue sheets and a cold window looking into the night sky and cry. 

* * *

"You look like shit." It was still dark out when Gabe answered his door, you showed up knocking a couple hours before his morning alarm would be setting off. His eyes were all black from just waking up you guessed after another fit of night terrors as usual. 

"Not in the mood for it." You warned. He could see your eyes were puffy from crying, cheeks slightly swollen from rubbing them all night and his expression dropped just a bit. Your lip was still quivering, your teeth biting at the inside trying to stop it and Gabe opened the door big enough for you to sneak under his arm and into his room, just like you used to.

"Having nightmares again?" He asked hesitatingly after a moment of quiet.

"No."

You climbed onto his couch and hid your face behind sleeves balled at your fists. God, you were still pissed at him for those fights in the plane where he said some vile things. Vile things that were apparently _true_. He'd make jabs at your inability to be alone, at the way you brushed off Morrison's concerns and you should have listened. Maybe then you wouldn't be single and crying on a familiar couch in the early hours of the morning.

The prideful part of you still wanted to fight though. The prideful part didn't want Gabe to know how right he was, he probably saw this coming from a mile away and would gloat in your face about it.  

Gabe stayed silent, careful eyes watching you as he moved to the kitchen and seemed to be on autopilot to start making his hot chocolate. It hurt your heart that he was acting like he used to, long before endless eyes and sneaking through doors with smoke, he was going back to his old ways of comforting you. He was clattering around in the kitchen for a few moments before you heard his burner click on and you could finally bring your face up to look at him again. 

"Do you want to talk about it?" He was already staring at you, his eyes meeting yours once they popped over the backrest looking his way. His eyes had regressed back to their normal whites and his voice actually sounded concerned about you, a surprise considering these last few weeks have been nothing but anger and threats to kill each other.

You opened your mouth to speak but found a lump wavering with a soft gasp and you snapped your lips shut, shaking your head no before burying your face in the back of the couch. As the pot was heating he rounded the couch finding you curled in on yourself and not wanting to even look at him. With a deep sigh he sat on the armrest, accidentally moving the couch under his weight and a hand fell to your back rubbing gently over your shoulder blades.

"I'm sorry things have been awful recently. I hope you know that even if we're mad at each other I'll never turn my back on you. If you don't want to work with Blackwatch anymore, if taking down Talon is doing more harm to you than it is doing good for the world, then it's not worth it." He spoke with sleep still in his voice, a slowness to it he didn't usually have. "I know I've asked a lot of you." 

You turned, twisting your body to face him as he sat on the armrest. You had to crane your neck up to look at him, but you still couldn't bring yourself to explain what led you here. Instead, you leaned heavy against him. Your head landed at the bottom of his rib cage, hiding your face from his worried stares. He moved, carefully, sliding off the arm rest and onto his feet to stand in front of you. 

"Something's wrong. What happened?" He was holding out both hands, offering to help you up, you guessed so you could join him in the kitchen. 

You took the help and followed him to the stove. He took his usual place next to the pot, stirring the hot chocolate as you jumped up onto his counter to sit where you have so many times before. He side eyed the way you took a few steadying deep breaths and stared up to the ceiling, attempting to dry watering eyes. God, how do you even begin to explain this? 

"Have you ever been in love before, Gabe?"  

"I-" He started to say something but stopped and chewed at the corner of his lip. "As much as I wish the anwser was no, yes, I think so." 

"Did she ever break your heart?" 

"Not nearly as many times as I broke hers." He breathed out. His gaze lingered on you just a little too long before dropping back to the pot on the stove. "Did you and Jack get in a fight?" 

"Something like that." You were staring at your legs hanging off over the counter and flexing your feet in the air trying to distract yourself. 

But a much better distraction came in the form of a ringtone in Gabe's pocket. He snapped to look at you with wide eyes and scrambled for the screen before holding it out to you, _Unknown Caller_ it read.  

"Hey asshole." You said as soon as call connected, all remnants of pain almost immediately filling with anger.

_"Language, pet."_   Fuck Tishler and the smile on his voice. "It appears we had a bit of a mishap in our attempt to reconnect with you. It was my understanding you should have been in that car with the Strike Commander. Having second thoughts about running away your prince charming?" 

"How the hell did you know we were leaving, Tishler? Who do you still have here that's feeding you info?" You were gritting your teeth through the questions already knowing he would never give up his source. 

"Oh, now that's no fun if I tell you." 

"If you wanted Commander Morrison dead you had your opportunity when you caused that wreck."

"It wasn't him I was after." His deep voice sounded all the more threatening over the phone. "No, I didn't want Jack Morrison, you should understand that his skills are not nearly as useful to me as yours are. You're quite elusive it seems, disappearing for days at a time and no one seems to quite know where you've gone. You and that Blackwatch Commander. I gave you the opportunity to come willingly, but it appears I'll have to bring you to Talon myself." His tone was getting angrier, scarier and you looked to Gabe who was staring at the phone in horror. "Keep your guard on, pet. I will catch you and I like it when I get a fight."

"You don't scare me." You snarled into the phone, hoping he couldn't tell you were shaking like a leaf. 

"Good. Then it will be a joy to watch you become afraid of me. I can't wait to see the look in your eyes when you realize you are helpless." 

"You're out of your mind if you think you're going to take her away from Overwatch-" Gabe chimed in but as soon as Tishler heard his voice the call was disconnected and you looked to the screen dumbfounded. 

You set his phone next to you before leaning your elbows against your thighs and burying your face in your hands. Fuck Tishler. Fuck him and his creepy plans. You were so angry that he would hurt Morrison just in an attempt to kidnap you. Guilt fell heavy in your stomach at the thought of him trying something like that again, of Morrison getting hurt because of you _again_. You could feel Gabe move next to you, he checked the phone to make sure the call was over before he put a hand on your knee and his voice wavered as he spoke. 

"He's not coming anywhere near you." Fingers squeezed and you looked up to his face, endless eyes were back staring straight into yours. 

"No." You stood as tall as you could. "We're going to him. We're going to end this. We're going to kill him." Nails dug into skin in an unintended flex and he quickly took his hand from you. "Do you still have my Talon uniform in that box?"

"Of course." 

"We're going in from the inside. I done fucking around with this dirt bag, I'm done following rules and worrying about the consequences." You could feel the anger in your chest, a burning in your belly that was out to get Tishler no matter the cost. Gabe's face read as a mix between shocked and ridiculously happy. He gripped his hands onto the sides of both of your arms, leaning forward so his face was directly in front of yours and endless eyes searched your expression for any sign of this being a joke just to rile him up. 

"We can be gone in less than an hour." His face was serious, clearly he was on board with your plan. The room smelled so sweet now with the final moments of hot chocolate boiling on the stove, if he didn't get back to it soon it was going to burn. He hesitated, leaning back and releasing you. "But I don't want this to come between you and Jack any more than all this already has." 

"We don't have to worry about that anymore." Shit. You didn't even think before you responded, Gabe reeled back with a concerned look. His black eyes slowly receded to normal whites. 

"Why would we not have to worry about that?" His head was tilted and you could see he already figured out the anwser but you chewed at your cheek for a moment before leaning forward and wrapping arms at Gabe's neck, bringing him quickly into a tight hug, hoping you could hide your face in the crook of his neck as you finally said it out loud.

"We're over." You mumbled under your breath. "He wanted me gone, Gabe. He broke it off." 

His body beneath your hug was suddenly rigid, unmoving almost like he couldn't comprehend what you said.

"Why would he ever do something so stupid?" His voice was accusatory, but he wrapped his arms around you and finally hugged you back. "What an idiot."

He was gentler with you after that. Slowly backing away to return to his finished hot chocolate, scowling as he poured it into the two mugs you always drank from. He leaned his hips against the counter and listened in patient silence as you told him what happened, as you recalled the pain of not telling Morrison why things were the way they were. He looked upset, but it wasn't directed at you. It was almost like he couldn't believe Morrison would do this to you. 

Maybe it was for the better. Without the extra attachment that made the thought of infiltrating Talon all the easier. Without Morrison in the back of your mind maybe you could finally give fully into the strength pumping through your blood. 

After a morning filled with the story of your heartbreak, it was decided. You and Gabe would fly into Italy, hide out in the plane while gathering intel for a few days, then infiltrate Talon HQ and take down Tishler. He would dawn the mask of Reaper.

Unknowingly to either of you at the time, this decision would be the seal of fate for your future. A permanent black mark in the story of your life.  

* * *

You left without any word to Morrison. You left without a trace and with a flimsy cover story uncaring of the man you were leaving behind.

The first few days were rough, you were trying to act normal with Gabe, trying to pretend like your heart wasn't hurting as you worked nonstop at decoding data files that would help you gain access to areas of the guarded HQ. He would spend his days slipping as smoke between corridors and planning routes, returning to the plane at night with new ideas and walking you through exactly how you'd be able to pull this off.   

It was one night when the air was particularly cool that a noise stirred you awake. You were laid on the cot, Gabe below and in the darkness you shifted to look down to Gabe whose chest was rising and falling with heavy sharp breaths. Smoke was pluming off his midsection into the air and small groans were escaping through grinding teeth. You reached down for his hand laid next to his face, fingers lazily lacing with his.

God you were tired. Is this how he felt when you’d wake him up in the middle of the night because of your own nightmares?

“Gabe-” You mumbled hoping to wake him. “Hey, wake up-” Your hand shook his, in the moon lit darkness you saw his endless black eyes snap open and his face focus on your voice. “It’s okay. You’re okay. We’re safe.” You were whispering, unsure what else you could possibly say to comfort him as his mind processed being pulled from some horrific dream.

“Shit.” His voice shook as his head dropped back down to the uncomfortable Overwatch issued pillow. His face turned to your hand in his, fingers squeezing yours. “Sorry if I woke you up.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

His breathing on the back of your hand was sending goosebumps up your arm. You both sat in silence for a moment as his breathing steadied, as he focused on controlling the darkness inside him. Every horrible feeling felt like it was mixing around in your insides, being woken up like this reminded you how comfortable you used to be cuddled up to a different super solider, safe in his arms instead of readying for a fight in a cold plane hidden on a rocky coastline. His fingers were grazing across the skin on the back of your hand. Something about still holding them together felt wrong, but you couldn't quite bring yourself to pry your hand away. 

"Are you doing okay?" His voice was quiet.

"As okay as I can be, I guess. Right now everything just feels... messy." You watched his smoke slowly stopping and wondered what he had been dreaming about. You hoped it wasn't about killing you, but you knew better than to question him about it at this point. 

“This whole thing is a mess. A mess that shouldn’t be your responsibility. It all started with me and my problems and it's unfair of me to keep asking for your help." 

“You're my family Gabe, I can’t turn my back on something this important, no matter how messy.”

His breathing caught for a moment.  

“Is that all I am to you? Family?” The silence that followed scared you, not in a way where you wanted to run or fight, but in a sinking feeling that you knew where this was going but weren’t sure if you were ready to face it. You knew what he really wanted to ask. “Just family?” His voice was soft but you could hear the suppressed gasp at the end.

“No.” You answered truthfully and your heart pounded in your chest. Every breath he took was hitting the skin on your hand and making your mind race. "Family can walk away if things get too hard or too scary. I think no matter what happens, no matter who either of us ever fall in with, no matter what military organization we're in, I think we'll always be connected. We'll always find each other and bring out the fight in each other. I think there's something inseparable between us, and I don't think it's just because of what Moira did. I don't know what you'd want to call that, but it's definitely more than just family."

He made a humming noise down below you. One that you couldn't quite tell if it was because he felt hurt by what you said or if he felt the same way. It felt like the air shifted. His lips and tickling facial hair brushed against your knuckles but you didn't pull away. 

"I see." He breathed out against you. "Try to get some more sleep. Big day ahead of us tomorrow." 

You closed your eyes, your fingers between his in an unsure hold as you slipped back into sleep after an uncomfortable silence. He sounded upset, but he clearly didn't want to talk about it.

As you slept your hand stayed in his, fallen from the cot and against the floor in his hold and you woke to find it in the same place you left it. The plane filled with stilled cold light of morning pouring in from the windshield and your stomach jumped when you realized you'd fallen asleep holding his hand. It felt wrong. It felt like you were cheating on Morrison, but how could you feel that way when he was the one who let you go?  

You woke before Gabe did. You took a moment just to look at him, at the way his hair was rapidly gaining grays, at the scars riddling his face making him look scarier than he was. He still hadn't cut his hair, but at least he trimmed his goatee. As carefully as you could, you stole your hand back and tiptoed to the box where your Talon uniform waited and looked at it as you thought about the plan you were just hours from setting into motion.

Things were going to be different now. Things weren't just going to be messy, it was going to be chaos and you didn't want to stop it.

Your red mask was getting scratched beyond recognition. Unable to bear looking at the scratched mask anymore you pulled out one of Genji’s knives and worked on chipping away the remainder of the shiny red paint until all that was left beneath was the reflective metallic silver. Red flakes littered the floor of the plane as you scraped at it, the noise stirring Gabe awake in the process. You stared at the mask, twisting it around in your hands and locking eyes with yourself in the distorted reflection.

“Lightning.” You sighed. 

“What?” Gabe asked groggily as he pushed himself to his elbows and was witness to your creation. You stood and showed him your work, handing him his Reaper mask as you walked by to the front of the plane and set your now fully reflective mask on the dashboard.

“I want them to call me Lightning.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Stormcallart did an amazing drawing from this chapter that you can see here](https://stormcallart.tumblr.com/post/183131539691/fanart-for-the-lovely-hostilewitness-ao3-of-a#notes), of the scene between reader and Gabe when she wakes him up from a nightmare and my heart can't handle it, it love it so much (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `)♡ please go check it out! <3


	2. Desert Skies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The initial plan was just to kill Tishler- but there's something more pressing that needs attention first.

Gabe was walking ahead of you, shoulders squared and dropped low ready for anything. He was walking with the same confidence he used to back on HQ, the confidence of a commander leading thousands- the same confidence before things started to fall apart.

“Again.” He demanded behind the Reaper mask.

“Never leave your sight. Don’t jump in a fight unless you tell me to. Don’t speak unless absolutely necessary.” You’ve repeated his rules more time than your fingers could count off.

He stopped to face you just before reaching the underground Talon tunnels you’d follow him in though. He adjusted his weapons at his side and cracked his neck like he was readying for battle, you rolled your shoulders beneath the heavy Talon uniform.

This felt like a trick or like he was too cocky in his own plan. He said he was able to infiltrate as part of the inner counsel, but that’s not something you just _simply do_. You had your suspicions perhaps this plan was put into effect long before you joined at his side, but you knew when you chose loyalty you did it with no questions asked and no matter what you were going to see this through, whatever it took. You were going to kill Tishler.    

You gave a Gabe a quick nod that you were ready and before you knew it you were following a trail of smoke down dark corridors, hugging the walls to stay in shadows and tapping away as quietly could with the heavy metal boots. Gabe knew exactly where he was going, routes he’d planned for days, but you couldn’t ignore the gnawing feeling telling you there was something more than that. He was moving quicker than usual, not as hesitant about stopping you when there was noise down the halls anymore.

He materialized in his full form again as soon as you reached a heavily armored metal door. You could hear the grunt through gritted teeth as he turned the dense handle with a loud thunk and it slowly opened to him. As you entered you tried to pull it shut behind you, finding it was too heavy to bring back. Gabe reached over you, helping you with it until it closed with a dull thud and he was trying to hide a low chuckle.  

"We need to start training again." You could hear the smile on his lips beneath the mask and you hit his arm in a semi-mocking (not really) jab.

For once you were glad to have a full face covering mask on, otherwise he might have seen the way you were blushing beneath it. Sometimes you forgot how _strong_ he was. Even with his super soldier blood in your veins you were still nowhere near his level, you couldn’t even close the door without his help and he _opened_ it completely on his own. You held your breath, biting back a thought you shouldn’t be having days after being broken up with and continued on his tail down now plush dimly lit halls.

The Talon base reminded you more of a luxurious hotel on the upper levels. Below, where the lower level agents were housed in the underground sections along with weapon caches, it reminded you of Overwatch. Gray halls and empty corridors leading to temporary cots and meal halls with tired faces, but above ground, where the higher ranks were housed was lavish like nothing you’d ever seen, especially for something like a terrorist organization.

Your heart almost beat out of your chest the first time you passed by Talon agents in the hall. Wearing matching uniforms to you and Gabe their only difference were the masks on their faces. They saw Reaper before you and immediately glued themselves to the wall to let him pass offering tiny nods that he ignored and you watched their shaking reaction carefully as you followed behind until you rounded a corner and they were out of earshot.

“You’re sure this isn’t going to backfire on us?” You whispered and he turned over his shoulder to speak low.

“Have a little faith in me.” His voice almost sounded joking, but his pace slowed until he was at a set of dark wood double doors. “Rules again.”  

“Never leave your sight. Don’t jump in a fight unless you tell me to. Don’t speak unless absolutely necessary.”

“Just repeat those to yourself while we’re in here. Remember, the goal today is only to confirm Tishler and Arntz are currently on the base and I need you to stay focused. Once we know they’re here we can nail down the final steps.” He put a hand on your shoulder, you could feel his eyes burning into you behind the shadow of his mask. “We’re going to take him down, just be patient and follow my lead, okay?”

“Yes, sir.” You straightened your back, remembering he was a commander after all.

He turned, and maybe it was just your imagination but his hand slid just a little up your neck as he pulled away, fingers lingering at the base of your neck forcing you to catch your breath- or maybe you were just nervous and things felt different with the Talon fatigues on. Either way the small touch both sent pockets of heat across your body, and brought your nerves to a calm. 

When he opened the doors you were almost floored by what you saw. When he said Reaper had been invited to an inner counsel meeting you never pictured the meeting room would be _like this_. It was a gigantic room with a long heavy table in the center and plush dark office chairs, a big red one sitting at the far end of the table looking your way. Strips of light from a dark lamp lit the table in dramatic lighting that made the room seem sinister.  

“Reaper, how kind of you to finally join us.” Tishler was sat in one of the dark chairs, Arntz across his lap and her arm at his neck. To your surprise she had legs again but they were _different,_ instead of the metal ones sent to you in a sleek black box they were made of hard light and being shown off beneath strappy shorts. “It looks like you've brought along a little toy with you this time.”

“She’s my second in command, treat her with respect or you’ll end up just like your colleges.” As Reaper, Gabe spoke lower and more gritty than he usually did and it sent a shiver down your spine. _Second in command_ , now that was a phrase that made your heart skip a beat. Tishler shifted uncomfortably in his chair, face dropping to a snarl and Arntz closed in next to his face to whisper something in his ear.

Gabe led you to the end of the table, you could feel his gaze linger on you in a silent check to make sure you were still doing okay.

“Let's get this over with.” He sat in the closest chair to the door and you stood at his side, hands balled in tight fists against your legs and standing tall like a good soldier would.  

Your eyes scanned the room. Apart from all parties you were already acquainted with, there were only two other people sat at the massive meeting table. A stoic faced young looking man in a Vishkar uniform leaned forward and activated a screen in the center of the table as an omnic in the other seat folded his hands in front of him. The screen flickered to life with video of a muscular man sitting on a cot in what looked like a prison cell.

"You chose a great day to show up again, Reaper." Tishler smiled before turning to speak to the man on the screen. “Sorry for the delay. We're here, Doomfist.” 

“Punctuation is important, we're now over fifteen minutes late. We need to get this done, tell me you've set everything into place.” The way he spoke sounded like a threat.

“We've run into some… issues.” Tishler started with a snarl.

“You are too focused on your own personal crusade, Tishler. Forget Morrison's girlfriend and look at the bigger picture, I'm not going to keep delaying this just because you've lost the bitch.”

You tensed up. Suddenly your gloves felt too tight for your hands, your armor felt three times heavier and it was like you couldn't breathe beneath the mask. Your eyes glanced to Gabe who balled a fist in his lap beneath the table and your heart was racing with panic. Did they know? Your mind was wrapping you in words and doubts, heart beat threatening at the base of your tongue. 

“You have one minute to explain what the hell we're talking about.” Gabe growled at your side.

“Happy to.” Doomfist stood and the screen followed him as he paced a small cell. “Considering Tishler seems to be _incompetent_ recently, we may have to put some of your special abilities to use to get this done. We want Overwatch out of the picture completely. Tishler had his opportunity to take this into his own hands with a sleeper agent but that plan seems to have wasted everyone's time.”

“It would have gone off without a hitch if my info was correct! Your double agents are the ones to blame, they said she’d be in that car with _Morrison_.” The way he said his name was as if he was spitting it out. Your head felt light, stomach churning. “I can get her, we’re just waiting on confirmation she’s back on base. Your plan is too extreme, mine takes care of the root of our issues without getting our hands dirty.” Tishler looked like he was holding back his anger, he pushed Arntz from his lap, ignoring her as she stumbled to her feet.

“Silence.” Doomfist’s voice bellowed over the speakers and sent a chill through your veins. “With Overwatch gone I'll be able to make my escape from here and we can take control of the rising tensions between humans and omnics. We can plunge the world into war if we wanted to without them around. If Tishler can not accomplish what needs to be done, you will do it Reaper.”

“And what is your plan?” Gabe sounded deadly and you weren’t sure if he was putting on a front or actually shaken from hearing this, but you were trying not to show that you couldn’t catch your breath.

“We're going to blow their headquarters into the sky.” Doomfist laughed with sweeping hand motions. “My only requirement is that we make sure both the Overwatch commander and that damn Blackwatch commander are there, we need to ensure we're eliminating the most powerful threats along with the physical base.” Your stomach hurt. “You have one month, Tishler. If you do not have that girl by then we're putting my plan into motion. Yours may take care of those pesky commanders but my plan sends a _message_ , wouldn’t you agree Reaper?”

Gabe responded with a grunt. You could see him cracking his knuckles under the table and the tendrils of smoke slowly starting at his shoulders.

“We’re ready when you are, Doomfist.” The man in the uniform said. “Just give us the word and my team will activate everything.”

“Do not jump the gun.” The omnic scolded. “If it comes to that plan, we will need time to prepare for any retaliation and to invest in our resources before hand, two weeks minimum. Do not make this call without discussing it with everyone first, understood?”

“Understood.” Doomfist grumbled at the screen. “Reaper, I certainly hope you’ll be joining us more often. Although I am certainty sad to see my former colleagues gone, I like your style much more. You’re more… _direct_ . I think our partnership will be beneficial to everyone.” He was smiling and you were struggling to not shake. This was more than you thought it was going to be. He didn’t just infiltrate Talon, Gabe was helping _lead_ Talon. A loud buzzing rang over the speakers, Doomfist’s cell flashed in red lights. “Dammit. These inmates are savages. I suppose I will have to check in again another time. Doomfist out.”

The screen disappeared and with it the man in the uniform stood in his seat.

“Max, we still need to discuss our payment, would you mind coming with me?” The man in the uniform looked annoyed. The omnic stood, quietly discussing something out of ear shot as they left the room through the double doors you entered and you were left in the quiet with Tishler and Arntz, waiting for Gabe’s next move.

“Excited to have you on the team, Reaper.” Tishler laid an arm over the back of his chair, legs spreading wide in front of him as he grabbed at Arntz, bringing her back into his lap. “What’s your name darling?” He nodded you way.

“Her name is none of your business.” Gabe shot to his feet sending smoke out in a puff around him. He turned to you, placing a hard hand on your arm guiding you back to the door. “We’re leaving.”

“Oh, don’t be a tease.” Tishler tsked under his breath and you could see Arntz was biting back a wicked smile. His hand slid up the side of her leg until he was fixing the edge of her shorts and she subtly rolled against him. “If you're going to be working with us then we'll need to know what to call the pet.”

You were sure Gabe could feel your whole body tense hearing the nickname. You had a visceral angry reaction when you turned to face him ready to shout at him not to call you that. 

“Lightning.” Gabe said through gritted teeth. Arntz giggled and you could see Tishler was gripping at the hard light legs high on the thigh. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Lightning.” He grinned at you. 

You’re going to be sick. Everything about this felt wrong. Everything felt like you were in a bad dream like you were stuck in a night terror and you needed to get out of there right that second. Before you could open your mouth to talk back, Gabe was leading you out of the room and as far away from Tishler as he could. He was still holding your arm, making sure you were keeping up with him and he barreled through the halls of twists and turns. You were blinded, vision tunneled in unable to focus on where you were going until you were back at the big metal door leading down into damp catacombs that would lead you back to his plane hidden along the coast line. 

"Take a few breaths." He whispered during a pause as you stood with him waiting for patrol drones to fly by. "First thing when we get on the plane I'm going to need to call Jack." 

* * *

At the plane you tore off the reflective helmet, letting it fall to the ground and you collapsed in one of the fold out chairs on the wall. Your knees felt weak. This was too much, Gabe was in over his head and he couldn’t see it.

He immediately ran to his phone and waited for it to light with life and you don't think you'd ever felt this anxious in your life. You were ripping off your armor, uncaring that it was getting dented as it fell to the floor without a care. As soon as his phone loaded it was pinging with back to back messages, missed call notifications, emails- everything he'd been ignoring for days. You were down to your fatigues only and Morrison answered on the first ring.

“Where the hell is she Gabriel?!” He was immediately screaming into the phone. “No contact for almost a week from either of you! If you're not back on base right now you can bet your ass I’m going-”

“Jack I need you to calm down and listen to me.” Gabe’s head was dropped and his eyes closed as he worked on his own armor, piling it neatly next to him. “We can’t come back. Not yet, it’s too dangerous.”

“There is nothing more dangerous than the hell you’re going to have to pay when you get back here which better be by _tonight,_  do you hear me? They’re considering marking you both as AWOL, you’ll be imprisoned if you stay away any longer-”

“If we come back Talon is going to blow up our base.” You tried to leave the emotion out of it, tried to ignore the blade against your heart hearing Morrison’s voice again.

He didn't speak. The other end of the call went quiet. You rolled your head back, eyes cast to the ceiling as you tried not to let emotions get the better of you. You were completely overwhelmed.  

“How do you know this?”

“If we tell you, you’ll only be an accomplice, we didn't get this information in any way you'd approve of.” Gabe was bouncing his leg with eyes watching you carefully.

"Since Tishler didn't get me in that accident you were in, there's a chance they may be moving forward with a different plan that involves exploding headquarters."

"Did-" Morrison cleared his throat on the other end, you could hear every moment of hesitation. "Did you find out why Tishler was after you?" His voice wavered. "Was it worth it?"

You covered your face behind shaking hands. Sure it was worth it, knowing this could save thousands of lives, but the secrets and the toll it took on your relationship with Morrison seemed harder to figure out if it was. 

"He was going to make her into a sleeper agent. We didn't find out much, but they wanted both of us out of the way. He was going to make her kill both of us, Jack." Gabe let the final piece of armor fall to the floor and you couldn't take hearing the silence on the other end of the call. You scooped up everything in your arms, bringing it to the black box waiting in the back of the plane. Gabe turned to see you gathering everything near it and tossed you his dog tags, the two keys jingled against them as they flew through air before you caught it. “Listen. Just sweep the place for bombs, if it’s clear we’ll head back and tell you everything. Until then we need to stay away because Tishler is still after her and I'm not willing to take any chances, I'm sure you aren't either.”

“Please, Jack.” Your voice dropped off as you said his name and you felt your throat stuffing up. “Please, Commander Morrison.” You corrected quietly and you weren't even sure if he could hear you from the back of the plane.

“How are you doing?” Morrison’s voice finally came hesitantly over the phone. “I’ve been worried about you.”

“Shitty.” Your voice barked but it was clear you were shaking. God, no. You couldn’t do this. You hunched over the box, pressing in the numbers to the code and flipping the lid open. Gabe turned his body away and lazily held the phone in front of his face.

“You’re a real dumbass, you know that?” He tried to say it facing away from you, maybe so you wouldn’t hear it, but you heard what Gabe said to Morrison and that only hurt your heart more. Gabe was mad and hurting too, but he didn't need to pry into your issues with Morrison. 

“What happened between us is none of your business, Gabe. She made her choices. I made mine.” The sound of his voice was pulling your heart from your chest. You heard him sigh, a disgruntled one you only heard before when he was telling you he was being sent away before. This time the sigh was for a much different reason. “I can hold off the directors for a few days, maybe. We’ll have the explosives teams sweep, but I want you two in a secure location and away from any potential enemies until you hear from me. I mean it, I want you absolutely isolated so there's no chance of either of you getting into a combat situation. Understood?”

“Loud and clear, strike commander.” 

There was a moment, a lull of dull buzzing where you imagined each of you were pondering the harsh reality of the future where coming back to base would only hurt each of you more. You could only withstand another few moments of the horrible wondering silence before you started hastily putting the Talon armor and your masks back in the box. 

“Gabe?” Morrison’s voice broke. “Take care of her, okay? I know you will. I know you… always have. Just-” Hearing his voice wavering is what killed you, you could _hear_ him stopping the lump in his throat. “I still love her, you know? I hate that it has to be like this.”

“She's protected with me, I promise. We'll wait to hear from you.” Gabe’s voice went soft as he brought the call to a beeping end and lifted his head to meet your eyes, you leaned the side of your head against the chilled metal of the walls looking to the ceiling hoping to dry your eyes.

He turned in the pilots seat, leaned down and readying the plane for take off. You didn't want to deal with this. You stood looking into the small supply closet he had tucked away at the back of the ship. There was enough food and water for just under ten more days, you chewed at the corner of your lip hoping that was more than enough. You could hear the telling beeps at the dashboard coming from the front of the plane, he was almost ready to get into the sky.

“Take a seat.” He called out over his shoulder. You hesitated, mentally counting off the number of meals before you’d be eating the ones that tasted worse than dirt. “I said sit down, we’re taking off!” He sounded annoyed. You walked to the front but stopped to recount as you stood next to him, distracted by the news of the day and mentally listing the order of which MREs when Gabe groaned in annoyance and pushed the controls forward lurching the plane into the sky.

You lost your footing, stumbling over ankles twisting over themselves before landing hard in a seat that most certainly was not a chair. You landed with the wind knocked out of you right on Gabe’s legs. Gabe, just a surprised as you were about suddenly being sat in his lap, barked out at you.

“What are you doing?!” One arm wrapped at your waist, holding you tight against him as the plane shifted so you wouldn’t fall to the floor.

“What the fuck, Gabriel?!” The upward motion of the ship was keeping you pressed against him at the awkward angle, his arm acting as a makeshift seat belt to ensure you didn’t fall back and hurt yourself.

“I told you to sit down, you should have listened to me!”

“You couldn’t wait five more seconds for me to sit?! Classic, Gabe. Really-”

“We’re _not_ doing this right now-”

“Yes we absolutely are! What just happened to 'she's protected with me', huh? What if I had fallen all the way back and broke my neck because you fly like a maniac?" You couldn't move your arms since they were being held against your body as he squished you with his arm, otherwise you would be beating them on his chest in anger. 

"You would have been fine, after all you're a super solider now aren't you? It would only take you a couple days to heal from that, I'm sure." Even though he sounded pissed off he still held you tight, not wanting to let go and actually let you fall back as the plane evened out high in the skies. 

"Here we fucking go again, Gabe. How many times do I have to apologize for keeping that a secret? Actually, no you know what? You have a lot to explain, how's it been keeping a secret that you're _running_ Talon now? You seem pretty comfortable there, I think this is about more than just getting Tishler. I think you _like_ it there, I think you feel powerful there. More powerful that you do at Overwatch.”

“And what if I do?” He leaned his face close to you, lips snarling and brows squeezing together. His tone was low and it made your blood run cold. “Are you going to run back to your little commander and tattletale on me? Are you going to beg him to take you back now?”

“Stop it.”

“What do you think? You can go back and everything will just be fine? After everything we’ve done to this point do you _really_ think he would still love you?”

You froze as your breath caught in your chest. He was staring at you with burning eyes, emotions mixing together making you unsure if he was angry or speaking from something else.

“You’ve always been jealous of him.” Your words tasted bitter and left your mouth dry. 

“I never wanted to be a strike commander.”

“No, you’re jealous of everything else. You hate that he’s _my_ commander, you’re jealous because I chose to a life with him over Blackwatch and I think you’re angry now because you can’t stand the thought of Morrison winning over you again-”

“He will never know you like I do.” The arm around you loosened, no longer holding you in place. “As much as I know it hurts you to think of this, I know _who_ you are. I know you could never bring yourself to break his heart by telling him everything we’ve done. We both know it would kill him to know that you’ve tortured and executed people. He would resent you for the rest of his life if he knew what I am and what you have running through your blood.”

“He would hate you too.” This fight was messy. You felt like you couldn't focus. You didn't even want to be fighting right now, but you knew you needed answers and you weren't going to let him distract you. 

“I know. He would never forgive me for what I’ve done to you or-”

“How long have you been part of Talon’s leadership?” You cut him off with a straight face, his dropped from unadulterated anger to understanding. 

“Weeks.” He blurted out. Weeks. That stung, weeks and you didn't know. “I forced my way into the position after we found that rose in the Talon safe house.” He sounded hesitant to say it, but then it clicked.  

“You mean after you asked me to kill you?” You pushed yourself from his chest body no longer leaning on his, instead your face inches from him stitched with concern. He looked ashamed.

“Yes, after I tried to get you to kill me. I was hoping Tishler would be there, I was trying to catch him from the inside but it was like he disappeared. He was just gone, until we got here a few days ago. It seems he was out hunting for you while I was hunting him. There had been rumors he was no longer on the base, so today was about confirming he was there, I didn't expect it to end like this. I didn't know his plans or what he was going to do to you. I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you I was deeper in this than I was willing to say. I promise, I’m an open book from here on out. You can ask me anything.”

You thought for a moment. There was always something that was eating away at you.

“Why was Blackwatch creating reprogramming drugs?” You dropped your gaze to your lap, hands folded against your legs. At your back Gabe dropped his hand and was rubbing small circles in a small spot with his thumb while he considered his words.

“We were going to use it on Talon agents to find out if they were keeping info from us even after capture.” The thumb at your back slid to your hip, his hand gripping you and pulling you closer to his body to adjust in his seat. “I’m disgusted in myself for allowing Moira to test on Blackwatch agents, she ruined people’s lives just to perfect that stupid drug.”

“You knew it was bad, but you protected me from it. I’m an agent too, Gabe. Any of them could have been me. Why protect _just_ me?” You turned your face back to him and his mouth was open as if he was going to explain himself, but he pursed his lips and leaned forward to rest his forehead against your shoulder instead.

“I’ve always had a soft spot for you. From the moment we’ve met, you know I’ve always tried to protect you from everything. I seem to have failed at that spectacularly at every chance, however.” He lifted his head, eyes checking out the window. Gabe’s hand fell to the scars on your arm, his thumb running over a particularly large burn mark and you kept your eyes on the way his fingers moved against your skin. He seemed to suddenly realize what he was doing and jerked his hand away, resting it on the console. 

You stayed quiet. Nails digging into cuticles as you thought about him openly walking about Talon HQ like he owns the place. Those Talon agents weren't just afraid of him because he could kill them, they were afraid of him because he was in charge of them and that made your blood boil. 

"I'm really pissed off at you." You snapped to look at him.  

“Then why are you still sitting in my lap?” His face was smug mixed with anger, an emotion you'd seen on him all too often. 

“Because the only way I know how to feel close to people is by physically touching them.” You glared at him, parroting words he once spat at you in an argument back at him. “Oh, don’t look at me like that Gabe, I know you like it. Jesse’s had plenty of stories about the missions you two would go on where you’d bring one night stands back-”

“Don’t you turn this around on me-”

“You sure liked it when I was in your lap that night you fucking _strangled_ me.”

“We’re really going to fight about this now? Really? What happened to ‘I don’t want to talk about it’?”  

“You’re just a lonely pathetic old man who was so desperate for anyone to touch him he was getting hard from seeing tits for more than a few seconds-”

“You know what? You’re right.” He stood, you fell from his lap to the ground in a hard thud and you looked back up to him in anger. “You’re right, are you fucking happy now? I _did_ like it and it took everything in me to stop you, especially after the way you sucked on my fingers like a goddamn porn star.” He laughed, a cold laugh as he ran his hands over his face and through his hair. “Don’t you blush now, you’re the one that decided to bring this up, no reason to get shy about it. Did Jesse tell you about the time he walked in on one of those one nights stands too? Had the girl on top of me exactly how you were that night, because _that’s_ how much I liked it. Is _that_ what you wanted to hear?”

You were speechless, eyes searching his face to see if he was telling you the truth or just trying to angrily get a rise out of you. You watched his face immediately change to embarrassed regret, he ran fingers over his eyes and groaned as he crouched down in front of you, face level with your own, hand reaching out to help you up. Without a second thought you took his hands, gripping harder than you needed to as he helped you to your feet.

“Could we stop fighting now, please?” There was a softness in his voice. “We’re going to take down Tishler. We’re going to take down the entirety of Talon, but I need you there with me and we can't keep drudging up the past. If I don’t have you by my side I know I’m going to lose focus, but I only want you here if you want to be here.”

“Are you going to threaten me if I refuse?” You scrunched your face together in anger.

“No. If we get back on base and you’d rather walk away from this, I’ll go to Jack and admit to everything myself. I’ll tell him about all the times I threatened you, all the times I hurt you, every lie and fake mission. I’ll tell him everything and make sure you don’t get dragged down in the process, I’ve done enough to you. I've always said you deserve better, and I mean that. I’ll take the fall for everything alone, is that's what you'd rather have.”

All echos of anger were gone from his face. Instead replaced with an honest sadness, with the eyes of someone who was regretting spiteful words. You brought him into a loose hug, arms circling at his back while you buried your face in his chest. You’ve both said horrible things to each other. Did terrible things.

Maybe in another life you would have never accepted Moira’s serums. In another life Gabe would have been cured of his genetic issues and there would be a team of Blackwatch agents taking down Tishler at the first sign of trouble. But this was your life, this is where your choices led you- hugging a man who clearly considered you something more than his second in command in his heart, a man who solely blamed himself for your issues, and who didn’t deserve to get pulled along with your bullshit. He didn’t deserve to feel the heartbreak that you did, he didn’t deserve to feel lonely like you did.

“If we’re really going to do this we’re going to need to be more present at Talon, they’ll get suspicious if we disappear for too long.” You finally said, leaning back to face your voice up at him. 

“What are you thinking?” There was a breathlessness in his voice, an excitement that you were agreeing to stay by his side.

You let go of him, taking a few steps back and sitting yourself in the copilot’s chair, holding your breath as he took a seat next to you. The flight course was heading somewhere towards Spain, you think. Off of any flight paths, away from any prying eyes, and into some mountainous desert where the plane could hide behind the shadow of tall ranges during the day and in the cover of night while you waited on the okay from Morrison to return to base.

As the plane darted through bright blue skies littered with clouds far below you hashed out an impossible plan.  

The day was short after choosing a place to land. 

In the cover of darkness, plane hidden away from enemy sights, after a meal and idle conversation, you climbed into the cot as Gabe settled on the floor below. You were exhausted, shoulders aching from the heavy Talon armor and the knowledge of Talon’s plans laying heavy on your heart. Even though you knew your body needed sleep desperately, you couldn't even bring yourself to close your eyes.

You laid on your side and listened to the sound of Gabe's breathing evening out as he slipped into sleep without you. You could faintly see him in the dim glow of the moon shining through the windshield at the front of the plane. He must not have been dreaming yet, his face was peaceful, no sign of stress lines furrowing on his forehead or teeth grinding together behind frowning lips, no sign of smoke or night terrors and you silently hoped he wouldn't have any. He deserved having a restful night of nice dreams for once. 

Your own mind was racing still with the thoughts of Arntz and Tishler. You've never had such a deep seeded anger towards someone, not one that had you planning every excruciating moment of their murder in your mind. With Tishler it was a hate that vibrated in your core like a star about to burst into a galaxy. At least when you hated Morrison there was guilt from his side, there was a deep hidden need to help you, there was something that _cared_. With Tishler it was loveless. Cold and calculated psychological warfare that threatened to tear down your sanity and you didn't even want to think about what would have happened if he got his hands on you in that car accident.

While your mind was fixed on what ifs, Gabe shifted below you. He let out a low groan that immediately sent a surge of heat through your body. Morrison used to make the same noise when he'd be half awake and pressing his body against yours on lazy mornings. He moved again, hips stirring beneath a thin blanket and just barely visible in the moonlit dark you saw his arm reaching to his center. His eyes were still closed, his mouth opened just enough for you to hear his breath picking up, but he wasn't moving his hand. Another groan escaped him and you could feel your cheeks burning. He was still asleep, unconsciously holding himself and you froze completely unsure if you should wake him or flip over and ignore the new sight.    

You didn't get a chance to do either. With a silenced gasp suddenly he sat up and you squeezed your eyes shut ashamed you were watching him in such a vulnerable state. He was breathing hard now, the hand previously between his legs now gripped into his blanket in an unsure still as he processed waking so suddenly and you could see he turned to look your way beneath a cracked eye.

He whispered your name in a hurried question. You laid as still as possible, not wanting to embarrass him- not like this at least. You could hear him moving in short bursts, almost like he was unsure if moving would wake you or not until finally the plane shook lightly as he carefully walked to the tiny bathroom in the back.

You were left, almost in shock, as you thought about what he was quietly doing behind a closed door. It's not like you didn't know he was a man with _certain needs,_ in fact you even used his insecurity about being lonely and sleeping with strangers as emotional ammo just hours before. It was just unexpected to see him flustered like this.  Your skin suddenly felt a little too warm, you were pretty sure you were blushing at the thought of him leaned up against the wall in there imagining dirty things to get himself off. You tried desperately to silence the part of your mind telling you he was thinking about that night, about you circling in his lap with his fingers in your mouth and his hand at your throat. You shouldn't think about that, you shouldn't have the mental image of him wrapping those big hands around himself- but it was hard not to when you couldn't even remember the last time someone, the last time _Morrison,_ touched you was.

This was mortifying. Were you turned on? No, no there's no way. You buried your face against your pillow and tried to think about anything else. Think about Petras, or small towns, think about snarky baristas or math or fucking _anything_ that wasn't Gabe jerking off to the thought of you in the bathroom. 

Never before had you forced yourself to sleep out of embarrassment, but you closed your eyes and with your body curled together you slipped into sleep. It wasn't for long, your sleep was interrupted by the edge of the cot lowering ever so slightly, his weight was near your legs and you could sense he was trying not to disturb you. It felt strange to act shy, to pretend like you weren’t awake when you were sure he could tell you were. You shifted to lay on your back, hand reaching down for him in the dark.

“Gabe?” Your voice felt distant even in your throat, but he turned to face you. There were so many things you could say to him right now, but you asked the only thing you really wanted to know. "You okay?" 

“Yeah. I'm just..." His words trailed off. "I wish I wasn't just another person who hurt you. You might not be able to see the scars I left like with what Jack did to you, but I know I fucked you up in a way that I can never take back. I know if I could do things over, I would do it all differently." 

"I wouldn't." You fingers landed against the ends of his. In the dark he moved his fingers between yours and held them there, laced together and you realized your heartbeat was picking up as you squeezed him. "Come on, get back to sleep. I'm waking you up bright and early to start training again. We've been slacking." 

* * *

You woke to the plane cabin filling with dull gray light, sun peeking behind tall mountains giving way to a cool morning. Gabe was on his side, usual smoke twirling from his shoulders and grimace on his face and you watched him in the still of the sunrise giving yourself a moment to consider what you were really getting into by committing to your plan to take down Talon. It was dangerous, beyond anything you'd ever done before. One slip and both of you would be in for a fight for your lives, but as long as you had him, it seemed worth it. Your heart still hurt, of course. A dull ache in your chest still pining for Morrison to be the one to comfort you as you slept, but something was changing, something you always felt deep in your stomach finally bubbling to the surface. 

You reached down, touching his hand that was next to his face and gently shaking to wake him. 

"Wake up, commander. It's time for practice." Your voice still sounded tired, words cracking as you spoke. He groaned and moved to wipe at his face, but his hand caught yours and wrapped fingers around instead.   

"Good morning." He was smiling, eyes opening to endless black to look up at you. "It's been a while, are you sure you're ready?" 

"I'll kick your ass any day old man."

He laughed and turned on his side, dark eyes fell to your hand in his and you watched as black slowly crept back to the corners. His lips were closed but he was smiling, maybe it was the lighting, or maybe it was the warm feeling your were getting from seeing him like this, but he looked so soft and that made your cheeks pink with happiness. With a little laugh in the back of your throat you stole your hand back and pushed yourself from the cot, it's squeaked behind you, metal moving as you stood and stretched before you bent forward to offer helping hands. 

"I'm not so old that I need help standing on my own, you know. I'm not even that _old_." He rolled his eyes as he stood, but still grabbed your hands to lift him. 

"You say that, but the grays in your hair say otherwise." 

"Hmph." He grunted as he stood to his full height and popped his back along the length of his spine. "Just you wait until you start getting grays, you'll never hear the end of it from me." 

You dug through your bag for clean clothes, changing in front of him like you had so many times before, but this time you felt hyper aware of the way he glanced at you from the corner of his eyes, you were all too aware of the way he turned his body just enough that he was facing away from you so you couldn't see his front as he hopped into his pants. 

"Do you want to start with sparring or something else?" He asked you over his shoulder. 

"I want to see exactly what you can do with that smoke, then sparring." You tucked your Blackwatch uniform shirt into the thick black pants as you turned to face him. He moved with ease now in his other form, a little too easily it seemed, but you wanted to know the full extent to how he was able to move with it. Curiosity peaked wondering how strong it was. 

He followed you out of the plane, helping you kick rocks out of the way from a small clearing near it. You started with stretches, twisting your body back and forth until you were standing across from him squaring him up. 

“It seems like you can control the smoke pretty well now." You started walking to the side, keeping your eyes on him like a hunter on their pray. 

“Watch this.” He grinned and in a blink his eyes flipped to black, in moments his body fell to the floor, a pile of nothing but black smoke swirled to your feet. You stood perfectly still, watching with with curious eyes as the smoke twisted around your shoe laces and tugged until they were completely untied. The smoke twisted around your ankles, crawling slowly up your legs and you stood still to watch as he rose higher and higher into the air. 

Smoke crept up, over your hand and up your arm. It was a light touch- there was something ticklish about it, like strings of long hair against your skin as he moved up and over your shoulders.

"Can you hear me when you're like this?" You asked to the air, unsure if he would understand you. The smoke fell back down your arm, gently pushing at your skin until you lifted you hand with your palm facing towards you and the smoke formed a vague resemblance of a hand, soft and barely there fingers laced between yours which you took for a yes. It made you chuckle and you stood with him swirling around your arm for a moment, thinking about what he could do that could prove his strength. "Take out my hair tie, if you can." 

The smoke moved up you, carefully swirling from your arm over your neck and into your hair. It was a bizarre sensation, like water moving through your hair almost as he figured his way through pulling the tie out. It didn't take him long, just a few gentle tugs and then your hair was falling around your face in a mess as your hair tie drifted through the air floating in his smoke. You watched it move across the dirt until he was forming again a few feet from you, the hair tie materializing around his wrist as he held it in front of him. 

"I have full control of it now." He breathed out with a smile across his face. "Thank you, for having the patience to help me figure this out. There's not many people that would have stuck around to see this through." 

In the plane you could hear the distant sound of a shrill ringtone, one you recognized as Morrison's on Gabe's phone. His face dropped. Gabe only turned to look at, no movement to anwser, only a deadened glance over his shoulder before you sprinted through the open door towards it. You hit the speaker and immediately spoke.  

“Hey-”

“Hi sweetheart-” He sucked in air sharply through his teeth. “S-sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.”

“Any word on the sweep, Commander Morrison?” You tried to keep your voice as professional as possible but his slip hurt your heart. Footsteps approached behind you, Gabe placed a hand at your shoulder, fingers squeezing you gently in a reminder that he was here if you needed him. You reached up with your free hand, at first resting your hand over his, but you slipped fingers between until they were laced together and you held him, tightening as Morrison spoke.

“It’s going to be a few days, at least. We're triple checking backgrounds on essential staff before we allow them to attempt the sweep.” You could hear him shifting, he let out a sigh you recognized as one he made when he sat down after being on his feet for too long. 

"Have you been awake all night?" 

"I want to make sure we get this done as soon as possible, I'm not sleeping until I know it's safe for you to head back." 

"Jack-" You sat down on the edge of the cot and your whole body cringed as you said his name aloud. Gabe watched the change in your face, the hurt that spread in seconds. "Commander Morrison, please. Get some sleep. I know you need it. Don't kill yourself just to get this done, we're okay for over a weeks worth of food if we need it, we're in a secure location, you don't need to worry about my safety."  

"Please, don't call me that." His voice was breaking, just like your heart. "You've never called me _Commander_ Morrison, please don't start doing it now." 

"Get some sleep, Jack." Gabe interjected, he kneeled down in front of you, placing one hand over yours as you held the phone. "We're safe, I promise. Don't overexert yourself, get some rest." 

The short call ended with a hurried goodbye, the breathless salutations of someone who really didn't want to get off the phone but knew it was for the best, and you sat with Gabe in a moment of quiet again before he took the phone from your hands and moved it to a pocket on the side of the plane to wait for the next call. 

"I know it hurts right now. I promise it will get easier, you just have to give it time and space. I'm here, whatever you need. If you want me to be your punching bag, I will be be. If you want to yell at me, go for it."

The way he was looking at you was softer than you ever remember him looking at you before. A gentleness that you didn't recognize, but one you were sure you'd seen before when you knocked on his door late at night and he'd make you hot chocolate. He touched a hand to your knee, a silent comfort that made your insides turn to mush and it hurt to realize when you weren't fighting he was always this gentle with you. 

Instead of screaming, instead of bickering or punching, you fell forward, arms around his shoulders and your face buried against his neck. He was warm and he stunk like stale plane air, but he wrapped his arms at your back and held you close, a hug that made your heart clench with happiness and you'd never felt more conflicted. You don't even know how long you hugged him. You know that by the time you let go your eyes were burning from the memories of tears, that he had carefully undone the knots in your hair with his fingers as they ran through. By the time you parted the sun was shining brightly over the mountains and he still had a distant pleading look in his eyes as he held your cheeks and studied your face. 

* * *

The days after that were calm. 

Mornings you would wake before he did and dress for practice while you checked his water bottle to see if it needed to be filled. You'd check your clothes and ignore that everything you brought was slowly becoming grimy with layers of dust from the mountain and stinking from days in the heat. In the height of the afternoons you would switch off listening to nearby comms, scanning for any signs that Tishler had somehow caught onto your trail and was tracking you or watching the screens for signs of life passing by overhead. 

In the evenings, when it was cooling down and the sun was setting, you would climb to the top of the plane with Gabe's help, setting down his thin standard issue Overwatch blanket and talk while the sun rested behind jagged mountains. Even though you knew you were being chased by a crazed maniac, even though your heart hurt from a breakup of a man you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with, it was calming to have days to yourself. To spend evenings reminiscing about days of Blackwatch with your second commander, reminding yourself of when times weren't so bad.

You could tell Gabe still felt empty about everything that happened with Blackwatch. Even though he missed so many people, he kept a smile on his face when he spoke to you about the team. Things were easier then, so much easier, and you wished you had realized it before things got so hard. 

Things things get messy. 

Life gets complicated.

Life finds a way of forcing you to face things head on.

The fifth night of being out in the desert with Gabe as you watched the sun setting together and sat on top of the plane, something about the air felt a little different. The sky was just a little brighter, wind touching your skin a little softer. Something about how he was holding himself was like he had something to say. With a deep breath he brought a bottle of whiskey to his lips and swallowed giant gulps that you were sure were going to make him gag, but he brought it down with single cough as he shook at the taste. He'd been saving the bottle, hoping to keep it for a celebration but by the fifth night of being bored in desert you were both looking for something other than just sparring to do. He passed the whiskey bottle back to you and you stared at him.

Already a little tipsy, you knew your cheeks were blushed- his were too. 

“No more secrets.” He said next to you. The breeze was moving his curls, pushing them with the wind and you watched as they shined against the warm light.

“No more secrets.” You repeated back to him in a hush, unsure where he was going with it.

“I don’t…” His voice trailed off as he moved to chew on the corner of his lip. With a heavy sigh he pushed himself up so he was sitting, you followed and curled a knee to your chest holding it there in a loose hug. “I don’t want to scare you away.”

“If you were going to scare me away that would have happened a long time ago, Gabe.” You chuckled and hit his arm but his expression was unchanged as he turned to face you with a particular sadness in his eyes. You furrowed your brows and reached out for his hand, landing on his scarred over knuckles before he balled his hand into a fist.   

“No, this is different. You mean so much to me. You’re my friend, and my confidant, and I meant it when I said you’re my second in command. You’re my partner and-” He couldn’t find the words, or he could, but wouldn’t say them. “I think if you’re going to stick this out with me, you should-” He groaned, pulling his hand away from you and down over his face as he cleared his throat. “You should know how I really feel about you.”

There went your heart beating like a hummingbird’s wings in your chest, blush covered your cheeks and you were sure the sunset was making it look even pinker. He looked like admitting this might actually kill him, his body was curling in on itself, face flushed with the embarrassment of a middle schooler finally admitting their crush. Suddenly all you could look at was the sky and the brilliant pinks mixing with vivid oranges behind wispy clouds.

“You don’t have to-”

“You look beautiful.” He blurted out and your eyes snapped from the sky to him. He looked mesmerized, chest rising and falling with deep shaky breaths as wide eyes studied your face. “You always look beautiful. _Fuck-_ ” He covered his face in his hands again and dropped his back to the plane, groaning in agony. Behind his hands you heard him muttering spanish to himself.

“Gabe, really you don’t-” You reached out, but stopped yourself before touching him again. He probably felt so guilty for thinking this way about you. He was looking at you in this certain way and you _just knew_ these weren’t the feelings of someone who just thought you were beautiful, they were feelings that had been clearly pushed deep down for far too long, ignored while you shut the door to Morrison’s room each night.

“I shouldn’t feel this way about you. I know you were with Jack and it hasn't even been that long since you two broke it off. I know I hurt you beyond anything you should ever forgive me for, but when you're around I just feel… human.”   

“Gabe-” You caught your breath. He was human, maybe not in his eyes, but he was still human. 

“It's completely selfish and maybe you’re right that I am just jealous, but I always want you with me. My room, the plane, meeting rooms and commissary- they all feel too empty without you in them now and when you first got together with Jack I really was lonely. I’ve taken every opportunity I can to have you with me and I know that’s horrible and selfish and it’s only caused problems between you two, but I just wanted to be close to you and- god, I sound _pathetic_ but I'm just so much happier when you're around-” He was still covering his eyes, fingers rubbing at the corners in frustration. You lowered yourself next to him.

“Hey, stop talking for once.” Without giving him a chance to explain anymore, you hugged one arm over his wide chest and laid on your side embraced against him. His body went completely rigid, arms frozen in the air at his head and holding his breath. You laid your head against his chest, lowering it slowly so he knew you were being careful with him.

After a long moment he finally let out the air caught in his lungs in the form of a nervous laugh.

“Please, don’t lead me on.” You could hear his heartbeat, faster than you’d ever heard it before. He dropped an arm, hand landing at the top of your shoulder and squeezing you closer to him. “If you don't feel the same way, please tell me, because now that you’re not with Jack I’m having a hard time holding back this need to hold in the ways I’ve always wanted to. I- maybe I'm just drunk, but I need you to know that when you hug me like this, or when you hold my hand, it means more than I can put into words.”

“Gabe." You squeezed him. "Shut up and just hold me.”

His arm fell along your waist, fingers landing at the bottom of your ribs. His other hand was touching yours on his chest, running over the scarred skin along your arm in slow sweeping motions. Your eyes were to the sunset, the final moments of brilliant color fading down behind jagged mountains giving way to purple darkness and bright glittering stars. In a moment of quiet the wind blew your hair across his body, he reached up, fingers grazing it from your face and running gently through tangled ends. His rapid heart was slowing to a normal pace again.

You sighed and shifted closer to him, pressing your body to his side and fingers playing with loose fabric on his shirt. All this time he’d been comforting you and you never saw the admiration in his eyes, or maybe you had but purposefully ignored it knowing you’d feel too comfortable falling into his arms like this.  

"You mean a lot to me too." You whispered against his strong chest as you nuzzled your face against him. Something about this felt _right_. You didn't feel guilty or distant, you felt comfortable and even... happy. 

Dirt from below was kicking up over the plane, hitting your exposed legs making you curl closer against him.  

“Tell me, what ever happened between you and that girl you loved?” You spoke softly, but enough for him to hear you. The hand at your hair trailed the ends of fingers down your spine lightly until he was holding your waist. His chest would rise and fall with every deep breath as the hand squeezed you and it felt like you never wanted to move.

"I'm hoping I still have a chance." He responded, quietly, but with a smile in his voice. 

The breeze moved across your skin sending goosebumps down your arm and over your legs. Night was coming. Soon you'd both be sliding off the edge of plane and into the cabin readying your nightly routines, but you didn't mind the thought of drifting to sleep resting against his chest in the chilling evening air as he held you. 


	3. Pivot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are taking an unexpected turn.

You were supposed to be heading back to base. A sweep of every floor, in every building, done in secrecy was carried out under Morrison’s direct orders while he oversaw every step of the way led to nothing but more questions. A sweep of every area, double checking with separate agents, but nothing turned up. Nothing out of place. Nothing out the ordinary. No bombs. No reason to avoid returning any longer. It was already early afternoon by the time you were heading back to base, but you heard yelling. A lot of it. Gabe was trying hard to keep his expression unchanged, but you could see the sound of Morrison's voice over the phone was slowly grating away at his nerves. Gabe was making vaguely positive _hmms_ back into the receiver, unable to even get a word in before he finally cut the man on the other end off.

“Okay, Jack I get it! We'll head there now, see you in a couple hours.” He angrily tossed his phone over the console and scooted forward to adjust the controls, you held on to the edge of your seat as the plane started in a hard left. “Hold tight.”

“Where are we going?” You stared at the tiny flashing map with worry.  

“Jack's in London with all the directors. Something big is happening, but he wouldn't tell me what." There was a snarl on his lips. “Some press event. They're requiring us to show up with him. After that we'll head back to HQ, the directors are staying behind to monitor the omnic situation.”

“A press event with…? Gabe, why would he need us there for that?”

“All he said was the directors specifically requested both of us there. I don’t like the sound of it either.” He placed a hand on the back of your chair, twisting it to face him. “Just try to act normal. Play nice for the directors then we can get out of there. It’s probably just some press circus they’re running to save face with the public since Overwatch seems to be making all the wrong moves lately."  

You sunk into the chair. Standing on a stage with Morrison surrounded by fake smiles and flashing cameras was just about the last thing you wanted to be doing right now, not when you could barely even think of him without wanting to break down in tears. Gabe let out a huff of air, pushing his hand over tired eyes and his greased hair off his forehead. The plane evened out from the turn, your feet placed firmly back on the floor and you stared at steel toed combat boots that were covered in desert sand.  

“Listen. Before we get there, before you see Jack again-" Gabe's voice was hesitant, unsure if he actually wanted to be asking this. "I think we should talk about what I said to you. Now that you know how I feel about you, I want to know what am I to you, how you really feel about me.” His eyes were begging. You stared back at him, cheeks burning and teeth gently chewing at the corner of your lip.

“My feelings…” You trailed off, pulling the edge of your dirty Blackwatch uniform sleeves down in fidgeting nervousness. “You’re my closest friend and the only person on this earth who knows _all_ of my secrets, so I know there’s no one else I can trust more than you. You know exactly how to make me smile, how to make me laugh. You know what makes me tick and how to piss me off.” You deadpanned and rolled your eyes to him. This felt ridiculous, you were trying to hide your face but he carefully grabbed at your hands and lowered them to your lap so he could see you, he could see right through your sarcastic armor. “I don’t know, Gabe. Right now I feel… confused. I’m having a hard time telling if the way I feel is is romantic or not. I feel like a terrible person because I want to keep you close, but I don't know if I'm just seeking out any nearby warm body because I’m hurting or if it's… something more than that. I'm overwhelmed, I think.”  

“That's okay." He breathed out. "I don’t want to fuck up what we have.” His fingers laced with yours and he leaned just a little closer. “I’m willing to take anything you’re willing to give. Friendship, or whatever else. If you just want to be my second command, so be it. If you just want someone to lean on, I’m here. If you want something more, I’m more than willing to give you that. If you need me to wait for you, I’ll wait.”

“I’m sorry, Gabe. I’m-” Your hands squeezed his, face scrunching in mixed emotions. “I’m just not sure what I really want right now.”

“Take your time. Nothing changes between us just because you know how I feel about you now. You’ve already given me so much more than I deserve after everything I've said- everything I've done- to you.”

“You deserve to be happy, Gabe.” Your thumbs ran over this skin, rough from practice days on end in the desert.

“You do, too." He squeezed you before slipping his hands from yours and backing into his seat, eyes shifting to the skies. "For now, stay on your toes. We need to expect anything since the directors are gathering for this. Whatever happens, nothing is going to stop us from taking down Talon. We're in this together." 

He held his fist in the air towards you. With a small laugh you punched at it with your own, breaking the light pouring into the cabin with your fist bump creating long shadows behind you. Even though things seemed uncertain and you were terrified of seeing Morrison again, that small gesture, a moment to alleviate tension that made your heart hurt, meant more to you than you could say. The rest of the flight you spent going through the cabin and helping him clean, wiping away dirt and dust, repacking the weapons, reorganizing drawers of clothes he'd had loosely thrown around, he stopped just before he was getting ready to head in for the landing.    

"We still have enough water for a shower if you want to wash before we get there." You grimaced as you looked to the tiny plane bathroom. The shower barely fit you and water almost always flooded the floor, but you'd avoided using it for a few days and the thought of being in front of directors smelling like the desert and BO was almost petrifying. "Make it fast though, we're almost there." 

Landing and being carted away to the press area was a blur. The airport had its own special section for all the Overwatch planes coming in, planes for directors and commanders, for agents, drop ships all lined up. Whatever this was, it was important. It was making your nervous. Gabe was trying to act coy, but it was making _him_ nervous and that was only making you pick at your cuticles more.   

It wasn't long before you were brought to the backstage area where agents were frantically running to head to their seats and adjusting formal uniforms. A familiar voice call to you, saying your name in a way that sent pins directly into your heart. Morrison stood tall above everyone, dressed in his formal blues, face clean shaven and bags under his eyes hanging heavy. Uniforms were laid out on a table next to him, yours bearing the Blackwatch band Gabe gave you from his own uniform long ago and your Blackwatch hat, and Gabe's Blackwatch formals next to yours. Morrison must have brought them, you were picture him rifling through a pile of clothes he packed up but never got the chance to send to you since you disappeared so suddenly.

Your fingers ran over Gabe's band on your jacket arm. You’ve never appeared in public before under Blackwatch colors, up to now it was strictly Overwatch.

Something wasn’t sitting right. This was more press than usual, more official than usual. This wasn't just another press event. People with headsets and clipboards were yelling around you that the cameras were about to begin their live feeds. There was no time to find a private place to discuss things with Gabe, instead you were both stripping to your underwear in front of everyone backstage and pulling on your formals as quickly as you could. You were ushered with your commanders up onto the bright stage where you sat, shoulder to shoulder with Gabe, and Morrison just on the other side of him while the other Blackwatch members sat to the other side of you. 

A weathered Director Petras joined on the stage and the murmuring from crowded journalists hushed as all attention turned to him.  

“Thank you for joining us all today. Overwatch has come to a landmark decision with the United Nations regarding the continued fight to suppress an international terrorist organization known as Talon. Up until now our Blackwatch division has been handling all matters related to Talon's operations, however, we have experienced mass targeted losses and brutal hits on our agents with body counts now totaling to well over a thousand lives lost. This led us to take drastic measures to ensure Overwatch is able to perform the duties needed to protect those we are fighting for, and we have decided to leave all terrorist intel operations to each individual country they are operating in. As of today, Overwatch is dismantling the Blackwatch division. All active agents will either be released from duty or be joining Overwatch forces-”

His voice continued on, but your heart was in your throat. It felt like time was stopping, like your lungs were stopping, it didn't feel like you were even attached to your own body anymore. You forced yourself to stare straight ahead, to not react. If you looked to Gabe you were going to break down. From the corner of your eye you could see Morrison's head turn to face you. He must have seen how hard it was on you to control yourself in the moment, his fingers flexed into the sides of his pants, curling into fists.

“For their service we would like to honor a few notable members of the Blackwatch teams. Our reputable Blackwatch Commander, Gabriel Reyes for leading an incredibly hard working team on countless missions to save lives. Joining him today are his faithful agents who stayed on even after tragedy struck, and an Overwatch captain who served with honor as a part time captain for Blackwatch while also performing their Overwatch strike team duties. For your bravery and faithfulness, please stand and-”

The director's voice faded into the background as Gabe stood, his shoulders tensed beneath the heavy formal uniform, hands gripping together behind his back and it was an outright struggle to not speak, to not yell, or scream at Morrison for not warning you about _any_ of this. You followed suit, standing behind Gabe along with other shell shocked agents to your side. You were too thrown from the whiplash of the announcement to react in any other way than shutting down and moving through a pinning ceremony on auto pilot. Morrison was the one pinning onto the formals, you dropped the forced expression as soon as your back was turned from prying eyes and cameras. When only he could see the look you were giving him it made his breath catch in his chest. His hands shook as he pinned the medal of honor on you and you burned imaginary holes into his head with intense eyes before turning to follow Gabe off the stage.

You stayed silent through the remainder of the press event waiting in the wings. Patiently waiting with your arms crossed in front of you, glaring at Morrison and the directors on the stage. You could see them shifting uncomfortably in their seats, avoiding glancing back your way, afraid to see the way you were looking at them with absolute hatred in your eyes. Gabe placed a rough hand on your shoulder, squeezing you hard and ripping your attention away from them. His face leaned down close until his lips were right next to your ear and you could feel his breath against your skin as he whispered. 

"Come on, we're leaving now." 

"I'm not going anywhere. I have a lot I want to say to that asshole." You hissed under your breath, turning your head his way almost hitting his cheek with your lips. 

"Not. Here." He growled. "They're having everyone with Blackwatch stay at a hotel for the night, fight with him there. _Not_ where the public can see it." 

He leaned back, the hand at your shoulder moved to the side of your arm. When you were face to face with him again you could feel your cheeks burning and you weren't sure if it was because you were beyond pissed off, or if it was because Gabe was so close you could smell the desert on his skin still. You lifted your eyes to look into his and took a moment to let out a hard breath, his hand slid down your arm, to your hand until he was cupping them together. 

"Let's go." He whispered, face angry, but voice softer now. Before turning to leave you looked over your shoulder, icy blue eyes caught yours and all you saw was pure betrayal before you whipped your head around and followed hand in hand with Gabe into the darkened backstage towards a bus waiting to cart away every, now former, Blackwatch agent to a nearby hotel for the night.  

* * *

The handful of Blackwatch agents left gathered with you and Gabe at the hotel bar. All dressed in Blackwatch formals, faces mixed with bittersweet celebration and glistening eyes on the verge of tears as glasses raised in a toast to the past, and to those that died along the way.

"For Blackwatch." One drink with the group, many leaving after the one to ponder their newfound freedom from Blackwatch in the solitary of their own rooms.

"For Genji and Jesse." One drink toasted to Gabe, chugged down just the way Jesse would do before he'd get too lightheaded and have to sit down.

"For broken hearts." One drink toasted to yourself as Gabe said his farewells to agents ending their contracts. 

Your body was feeling numb by the time you got a message on your phone, Morrison asking you to come to his room so he could explain himself. You scoffed, bunched your brows together with a bitter expression as you nursed your forth drink before Gabe swung back your way and noticed that you were leaned far down in a chair with your arms crossed, glaring at your phone. He pushed at the screen with a finger, revealing the message and the picture of Morrison from Indiana with drawn devil horns still showing as his contact. 

You downed the rest of your drink and handed the empty glass to Gabe who looked at you with eyes that asked you not to leave. You shoved your phone in your jacket pocket and wandered your way to the elevators, through the bright halls and down towards his room, ignoring your Blackwatch commander biting his tongue from stopping you. You debated taking off your formal jacket, taking off your Blackwatch hat or your shiny formal shoes to be more comfortable for this, but _no_. He was part of the reason Blackwatch came down you were sure of it, and you were going to ensure he had to stare back at the colors the entire time you got answers from him. 

Something about seeing him open the door, dressed in only his formal pants and his dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, made you increasingly mad and warm like you wanted to jump on him at the same time. His hair was disheveled, lips chapped from hours of flying and days of stress. He looked to you with eyes that tried to hide pain, but he always struggled with wearing his heart on his sleeve. 

"The directors still thought we were together so they didn't book a separate room for you." He was playing with the rolled up ends of his sleeves, his shoulders dropped as he leaned up against the edge of the hotel bed and you closed the door behind you just a little too hard. "I understand if you don't want to stay here tonight, but, I'd like it if you did."

"Are you fucking kidding me Jack?" You spat out. "You just let everything Gabe and I go to waste and you're asking me to _sleep with you?"_    

"All I'm asking is that we have a normal conversation! I don't want to fight with you, I don't want you to hate me because of something I couldn't stop." He reached out to you, but you slapped his hands away.

"Don't touch me." Your head hurt and you couldn't tell if it was the alcohol or just the pain in your heart spilling over. 

“I promise, I had nothing to do with it! It was completely out of my control, my hands were tied!” 

“Well I hope you're happy now! You got everything you wanted, huh? Now you're in full control of me again, no more Blackwatch, no more Gabe, no problems then, isn't that right?" 

Morrison froze, pushing his shoulders back before angrily undoing the buttons of his dress shirt and throwing it to the bed. 

"Fine, you want to fight? What about you holding hands with him and running of like that? You really want to tell me nothing ever happened between you two now?" He really was pissed off. He wasn't even folding his clothes, he was letting his hair that was getting too long fall over his forehead.   

"I'm not fighting with you _again_ about this, I'm not. Ask him yourself if you're so fucking worried! He'll tell you the same thing!" Your arms were crossed over your chest, nails digging into the arms of your jacket. "And in any case, I can fuck anyone I want to now, _even_ Gabe. You don't get to tell me who I can or can't spend time with."

"I'm your fucking commander in case you've forgotten!" He shouted at you and actually shook you to your core. "If I find out you two slept together then I'm not going to let it slide, it's still very much against Overwatch regulations for a _captain_ to sleep with a commander-"

"Oh, but before it was completely okay because it was you?" You were getting angry. Not just angry. Bitter. Vindictive. Mean. If you didn't leave now, you'd be making low blow personal insults. You'd tell him all about how happy you were these last few days spending days practicing with Gabe in the desert. You turned on your heel and huffed as you opened the door the hallway.

“ _Please_ , wait just stay. Talk to me. You've been gone and I've been a wreck without you.” There was finally an ounce of honestly in his voice, but it was too late. 

“Did you forget you _broke up with me?_ Maybe one day I'll be able to have a conversation with you Jack, but it's not today. Not after you've just let everything I've worked towards be ripped out from under me.”

“I tried to stop them. I couldn't. I really tried.”

“Like you tried to stop me from being on that _fucking_ contract?” You spit out at him in a moment of anger and suddenly there was a stillness between you. Like the wind was collectively sucked out of the room. His face flushed and you saw hurt cross him in a way it never had before.

“I tried to stop that too. You _know_ I did.”

Your face burned. You had to get out of here otherwise your heart was threatening to jump out of your body. You heard him suck in his breath as you left, but you couldn't look over your shoulder to him when the door closed. When it shut behind you and you were faced with the bright lights of the hallway, it felt like you could breathe again. Your travel bag had been delivered to Morrison's room, you saw it sitting on the hotel dresser, but there was no way you'd be turning around to knock for it now. Instead you pushed yourself from the wall you were leaning on, and you made a decision. You were going to find Gabe. 

He looked pissed off when he answered his door. His eyes were sunken in just a little more than usual, lip snarling just a little more than it would when he was normally upset. He was scowling, until he realized it was you and that you were angrily holding back tears. 

“I'm sleeping here.” You stated as a fact.

He opened the door more, arm wide and you ducked beneath it into his room just like you had hundreds of times before back on base. You were ripping off your formal jacket, throwing it to the dark hotel floor without a second thought. Gabe stood back, watching as you tore your hair out from a military perfect bun, and kicked your scuffed shiny shoes across the room. He was already down to his undershirt and briefs, a familiar sight now, but he still looked tensed and upset. 

“This is _bullshit_.” You said to him with bobby pins in your mouth, your hands helping you shimmy out of pantyhose from beneath your skirt and throwing them at his feet. “They can’t do this, we’re so close!”

“Hey, don’t get angry at me. I’m just as pissed off about this as you are. But, this is how Overwatch operates. We’ll find a way to work around it, I promise.”

“They don’t know about everything we did to get where we are, they don’t understand how close we are to taking them down. They don’t know about what- about what _I did_ or about what _you_ did.” You pulled the stark white uniform shirt from its tuck at your skirt and started with the buttons, Gabe turned to the side avoiding his eyes, avoiding the chance the stare as your fingers worked. 

“We did what we had to.” He mumbled.

“Murder, Gabe? Was that really what we _had_ to do?” 

“I know you’re not actually upset about that.” There was a smirk in his voice, he knew he was right but you stomped your foot and shook your head in defiance. 

“I’m pissed off-” You inhaled as Gabe grabbed at your shoulders bringing you to a standstill in front of him, eyes burning into yours and staring at you with a knowing glare.

“Jack set you off, didn’t he?” His voice was low. You sucked in your cheeks, eyebrows furrowing with pouting anger and you tried to pretend like you weren’t taking painfully deep breaths in a poor attempt to calm yourself down. Down to just your thick uniform skirt and the white undershirt, hair a twisted mess around your head, you leaned forward, hitting your forehead hard against Gabe's chest before wrapping tight arms around him. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." Was all you could choke out. 

His body leaned against yours, his big hand slipping into your loose hair holding your head against his chest, the other carefully holding you at the back of your shoulders. His face leaned forward, mouth landing on the top of your head in a comforting kiss. You gripped into his back, fingers digging down and holding him as he tried to soothe you by combing fingers through your hair. He'd hugged you hundreds of times before, hugs that always intended to make you feel better, but there was nothing quite like this one. The way he touched you was so much more intimately than he ever had, no longer afraid to have his body close to yours, no longer afraid of the repercussions of holding you like a lover would, and that felt so _good_.  

"It's been a long day. We should get some sleep." He whispered against you. You parted from him slowly, nodding as you continued to remove the uniform, stripping down to just the undershirt and your panties- just like him. 

It was only as soon as you parted you realized he was in a room with only one bed. Your eyes darted from it to his face and his face lit with a small laugh as he realized what you were thinking.

"I can sleep on the floor, if you want." 

"You've been sleeping on the floor _forever_ , Gabe. It's just a bed, I don't care if we sleep in it together." Truly, you didn't. There were many people you've slept in the same bed with an never once did that lead to anything beyond tugging at a blanket in the middle of the night. He smiled, a still semi drunken smile and tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear making your face pink with blush. 

"If everything else has gone to shit, I'm glad you're still with me." His fingers grazed across your cheeks before he turned, flopping into the bed and pulling lush blankets over his tall body. "Plenty of room for the both of us!" He laughed out, patting the other side. 

With only a little hesitation you crawled right from the other side. He clicked off bedside lights and the bed shook as he settled at your side in the darkness. The buzzing of overhead air conditioners seemed louder than it ever had, light from beneath the door to the hall giving you the only visual sense of where you were or what was happening in the room. You laid there, in the quiet and the dark, completely stilled, paralyzed almost at the thought of laying in bed with another super soldier. You tried to sleep. Mind tired with anger and alcohol, you did close your eyes but sleep eluded you.

Confidence grows in the dark when no one is able to see the heavy blush weighing down your cheeks or the way your breath was shuddering in your chest. You were laying with your back turned to Gabe, nail at your lip tapping in thought. You were cold, he always kept his rooms too cold, but was that really the only reason you wanted a warm body against yours? You cuddled with him before, leaned on him on his couch on particularly bad nights. Now shouldn’t be any different. Right?

“Gabe? Are you still awake?” You whispered over your shoulder into empty darkness. There was a pause, a moment where you thought he may have been asleep, but he shifted beneath the blanket to face his voice towards you.

“I am, you okay?” He probably thought you'd fallen asleep and had a nightmare.

With a shaky breath you flipped around, scooting towards him, awkwardly shaking the bed and moving the sheets with you as you got closer until you found his body, drawn to his warmth like a moth to the light.

“You’re _freezing_ -” He gasped out, his arm moved up, over your face then buried itself behind your neck as a makeshift pillow, both warming you and keeping you close to him. He was radiating heat and it felt like you would melt into him. Your hand landed on his abs, fingers falling against hard lines of muscle shaking with every inhale. He tried to hide the way he was breathing as he sucked in air between gritted teeth when you touched him, but that was a little difficult to do when his head was so close to yours.

“Sorry, I know my hands are cold.” As lightly as you could, your fingers trailed over his stomach trying to find somewhere to rest. A little groan fell past his lips, his body rolled trying to adjust but you could tell how hard it was to hide the way you made him feel. Call it intuition, but something told you that was making him warmer than he already was. 

“Careful with that hand.” He breathed out and it felt like your whole body flushed. Immediately you shot up from where your fingers were lingering below his belly button, up his body until it was resting near your face on his chest.

He laughed and picked up your cold hand with his, bringing your fingers to his lips and placing little kisses before returning them to his chest. He could probably feel how hard you were blushing, he probably knew you were adjusting your hips in an attempt to not feel the dull ache between your legs. You rested there for a while, ear listening to a heartbeat that picked up every time your fingers twitched. Slowly, you were finally drifting off, eyes fluttering shut wrapped in warmth and in arms you trusted to keep you safe.  

Like your own confidence, his shifted as well. Just before you finally nodded into sleep, he gently pushed at you to flip you on your side, moving you instead so his chest pressed against your back, arm draping over your waist, and hand careful to land just far enough away from your chest that he wasn’t touching you _inappropriately_.

“Is this okay?” He whispered above your ear. It sent tingles down your skin straight to your toes making them curl. _Is this okay?_ He was asking like you couldn’t feel him half hard pressed against your ass. Maybe confidence from lingering whiskey shots, or maybe just a desperate need to be touched, but you grabbed his hand, lacing you fingers with his and brought it to your chest, pressing the tips of his fingers near your nipple as it poked through your undershirt.

"Only if this is okay." You didn’t even try to hide the smirk on your lips as you felt his whole body tense when your fingers curled into his and held him close to your body.

 _"Oh."_ Fell from his lips, softly and under his breath you just barely caught him say it as the air from it pushed across the skin of your neck. His thumb brushed across the fabric, passing over your hard nipple making you squirm just a little against him. Behind you his body pressed closer and you felt how hard he was becoming, but you were slowly drifting to sleep now, finally wrapped in comfort and you moved his hand further up so it was resting in a loose fist against your collar bone. 

“Night, Gabe.” 

"Goodnight." He had a smile on his voice, a smile that softened him even in the dark. 

Still a little tipsy, but still very much pissed off about the events of the day, it felt almost like a dream to be falling asleep in someone’s arms again, to be held and under the covers of a real bed and not a hard cot. You fell asleep within minutes of closing your eyes, and for once, you weren’t awakened in the middle of the night by the pained groans of a man being tortured by his own mind. With arms around you, body against yours, you both had dreamless nights. For once, finally, you both slept the whole night through.

* * *

When you woke he was still wrapped around you, body flush against your back, hand resting on the height of your thigh. You woke to your cheeks burning against the cold air. In your half sleeping state you were on autopilot, mind slipping back to the thought of Morrison being the man behind you, of Morrison waking you up this way on countless mornings, of _Morrison_ being the one who was rock hard and pressed against your lower back throbbing with need. You didn’t mean to do this to Gabe. You knew it was completely unfair to him, but your mind didn’t click yet when you had been scooting back further against him and wiggling your hips at him to get a rise. He was hard against you, so hard that you almost couldn't believe what you were feeling. 

Now you were still as a statue, horrified that you caused this _knowing_ his feelings, knowing that you’d teased him to this point without realizing the consequences this might have on him. You weren't trying to lead him on, you never wanted to do that to him, but you also weren't sure if you were ready for something like this. You listened for his breathing to tell you if he was awake yet or not, to figure out if he was lucid enough to know if you moved so you didn’t embarrass him. He wasn’t breathing heavy, no catching his chest, so you tried to carefully roll your hip forward and away from him.

Fingers tightened against the skin on your thighs, a small moan left his lips that sounded laced with sleep. Your heart practically beat out of your throat, you could hear your own pulse in your eardrums and you hoped he couldn’t tell how fast your heart rate was.  

“Stay.” Was all his groggy morning voice could croak out until he cleared it. “If you want to.”

You were blushing and so _warm_. He felt so good behind you, something about the way his dick curved against your lower back, the way you could feel him getting more turned on by the second was sending warm shivers down your spine. You adjusted your hips and were suddenly aware of how wet you already were, of a deep ache at your core that wanted this more than you ever thought you did. You gripped into the sheets, lip bit nervously between teeth and you circled back against him in a teasing grind, forcing a moan from him.  

“Tell me you don’t want this.” He dared right up against your ear. He wanted you to stop him. He wanted you to be the one to tell him this was too much, but you didn't feel like stopping. Even though your head was pounding from not drinking enough water, even though the sun was hurting your bloodshot eyes through sheer curtains, you _definitely_ wanted this. In fact your body was begging you to let him continue, aching to be touched after being left alone for so long.  

“Gabe-” You whimpered, unintentionally letting his name slip from your lips.

You lifted a leg as you adjusted your hips, just slightly, enough for his covered cock to poke between your thighs and you stilled for a moment with him between your legs, pushing taut fabric against your panties. His hand at your hip gripped down, a low groan escaping him breathed against your ear. He was moaning deep in his chest as you heard him shift behind you, knuckles bumped against your skin as he hurried to release himself from his briefs. You buried your blushing face in the pillow, away from his gaze as he returned, hard and warm at your thighs rubbing along the length on the outside of your panties. 

“I like the way you moan my name.” His hand wandered up your arm, petting at your bicep as hips slowly and shallowly thrusted between your closed thighs. You were trying not to gasp at the size of him spreading your legs as he pushed between them. He was hot and heavy, his cock pushing and pulling its way teasingly between pressing legs, riding against you and teasing you in a way that left you a panting mess digging fingers into the sheets.

“That feels-” You gasped and felt him twitch against you. Your hand reached down, fingers touching his tip as he pushed through to the other side of your legs with wicked thrusts. He was fucking your thighs, hitting your covered slit just enough to catch a growing wet spot each time he pushed forward. “You’re-”

You heard him chuckle behind you, a laugh that woke him up and had a hint of nervousness to it. You knew from the time you sat on top of him, from all the times you’d changed in front of each other, from his _cocky fucking attitude,_ that he was big, but feeling him between your legs like this was beyond anything you’d ever anticipated. Your fingers were catching his tip, rubbing against the head with his sleepy thrusts as he met your fingers when he pushed through to your front. You were shaking. The insides of your thighs were twitching and your body ached to grind back against him, but you felt dizzy. Nauseous almost from a hangover. You stopped because you were dizzy, but you turned to face him for another reason. 

You didn't want to hold back, not this time. 

You wanted to kiss him.  

“Gabe, wait-” You finally sputtered out.

“Sorry, I-” He pulled back, away from your legs and his hand went straight down to his core to cover himself thinking you were changing your mind about having him fuck you until you couldn't remember your own name. 

“No, don’t-” You turned, meaning to make it a graceful as possible, but in the quick movement you accidentally elbowed his chest hard, knocking the wind out of him. In the process of trying to reel from that you turned too quickly, hitting knees against his and he groaned in pain, curling into a ball against the bed, but his lips were smiling and his cheeks were definitely pinker than usual.

“Geez, you could have just told me to stop, you didn’t have to beat me up-”

You laughed, nervous because this was new and this was scary, but something about this was _right_. His face leaned against his pillow, eyes looking to you under heavy lids and his hands hiding the evidence of how aroused he was, even after the accidental roughhousing. He sighed, happily and through his nose as you looked to him, fingers to your mouth hiding your own silly smile, and his eyes never looked so gentle- even though they were still endlessly black with sleep. 

The smile you were holding back behind a bit lip as you looked to him quickly dropped when Gabe was interrupted by knocking. Your face dropped as you turned to look at the door. You knew that knock. You’d always know that knock.

Gabe hurried out of bed, his eyes quickly shifting back to normal as he tucked himself back in his underwear and cleared his throat before he ran a hand over his face and smoothed out the hair on his head before opening the door.

“Why are you all sweaty?” Morrison’s voice asked just out of view from you. 

“Just tell me what you want, Jack. I’m trying to get my _beauty rest_.” Gabe leaned on the door frame, keeping you out of Morrison’s sight with the door closing as much as possible.

“I wanted to talk to you. Apologize, actually, for what happened. I need you to know I tried everything I could to stop it. They wouldn’t listen to me, Gabe.”

"Not really in the mood to hear this right now." Gabe looked over his shoulder, meeting eyes with you briefly. You brought the blanket to your face, hiding the blush still creeping on your cheeks. "Let's talk about it when we get back to HQ, yeah? I still need some time to think on it. They said I could take early retirement or continue on as a recon commander, I think I need to clear my head a bit before I make any decisions." 

There was a moment of quiet, of legs shifting as Gabe closed the door just a little more. 

"She's in there, isn't she?" Morrison's voice wavered. 

"Even if she was, that wouldn't really be your business anymore, would it?" Gabe sounded annoyed, but you couldn't help feeling some sense of happiness that he was sticking up for you, that he was saying exactly what you would have. 

"No." Morrison cleared his throat. "I guess not. I'll check in with you later Gabriel. Her stuff is being sent to the flight bay now, be ready to fly out in an hour." 

Heavy footsteps left down the hall and you were left with Gabe giving you a nervous face as he closed the door and turned back to you. Instead of words, you reached out to him, hands inviting him back to the bed which he grabbed with care and fell back against the pillows with you. Your head returned to his chest, taking in a moment of peace before it was time to head back to HQ and face the reality that Blackwatch would no longer be your home. 

* * *

 

You quietly packed travel bags onto the plane, bags with a mix of Overwatch uniforms, Blackwatch uniforms, and clothes you’d left in Morrison’s room before you took off on an insane mission with Gabe. Both formal uniforms were zipped up and hanging in dust bags out of sight and out of mind as you moved through the cabin helping Gabe with the final checks before take off. You tried to hide the lingering heartbreak on your face after catching Morrison's plane slowly pulling out through the window, tried not to show that your heart just wasn’t in this anymore. You chewed at your nails. You couldn’t go back there. You couldn’t face Overwatch again.  

Gabe slumped into the pilot’s seat. His eyes followed you through the cabin until you took your seat next to his and offered up the smallest smile you could muster. It was a line of planes. Overwatch and Blackwatch branded alike, all lined up with Gabe’s tiny plane taking off last. You watched as each ship lifted into the sky, slowly distancing until they were dots on the horizon and yours idled on the runway waiting the okay from air control to lift into the airspace. 

When it was your turn to take to the clouds, you curled your legs to your chest as the plane arched into the sky and you held your knees close to you, teeth tapping against the hard backs of your nails. You stayed that way as the plane flew high over clouds, into the endless bright blue far beyond any land or prying eyes as an engine roared and drowned out the shuddering breaths leaving your throat. Gabe kept glancing at you. He knew something was wrong, but he was too afraid or too unsure to say anything.

You finally built up the courage to speak when he flipped the controls to autopilot. You head snapping to face him and his waited patiently to hear what you had to say. 

“Maybe we could just…” Your cheek leaning on a knee, hiding your face as if someone else would hear. “Not go back?”

His brows shot up. Eyes full of surprise and he opened his mouth to say something but immediately closed it, glancing at the controls. He brought a hand to his face, fingers thoughtfully stroking his chin through thick facial hair.  

“You mean just tonight, or-?”

His eyes snapped to yours. Staring directly at you, waiting on your word. As he looked at you, his hands moved to the controls, just one jerk away from turning the plane and abandoning a lifetime of work. You leaned forward too, fingers waiting on the buttons to cloak your location, to drop off the Overwatch radars completely. 

“Ever.” Your voice sounded almost surprised in itself when you said it.

“You understand we would be on watch lists, wanted in every country, marked as traitors. Going AWOL is no joke.” He warned you, but his hands were already working on charting a new course. 

“I’d like to see them try to catch us.” Your heart was pounding harder than it ever had in your life. Of all the life threatening situations, all the combat and tender moments, the adrenaline from just suggesting this was sending your pulse into overdrive. He froze to look at you, his eyes shifting to all black and all at once it hit you how serious this was. How much he wanted this, how _long_ he's probably waited for you to suggest something like this. 

“You can’t contact Jack.”

“Good.” You breathed out.

“No backup. We’d be on our own.” It was like he was trying to talk you out of it, but only making points that he knew would make you want it more. You unbuckled your belt, stumbling to your feet towards him and you wrapped your palms on either of his cheeks. He looked to you with wide endless eyes, head like putty in your hands as he fell into your palms like a touch starved animal.

“I have everything I need.” Your voice was breathless as you leaned forward. 

He must have known what you were going to do before you did. All at once his arms were wrapping at your waist and he was pushing himself up from his chair to meet your lips with his. It was the kiss of someone who's waited a lifetime. A kiss from a man who thought he was dreaming. He was soft, at first. Mouth testing against yours, facial hair tickling your chin, but arms squeezed you in a hold that told you he’d waited forever for this moment. Hands wandered to your hair, slipping between strands and keeping your face against his as he deepened the kiss with his lips crashing harder against yours. He was gasping between each movement to bring you deeper into him. You couldn’t breathe, but you didn’t care. You were giving him air you’d denied him for long and nothing could rip you away from lips that tasted like lovelorn peppermint chapstick blossoming into burning freedom.

You panted when he parted from you, your cheeks burned as you realized you were desperate to kiss him again already, but he dropped back to his seat, his hand fell into yours and fingers curled together as he tried to wipe away a smile before moving the controls faster than you’d ever seen him do in your life. Your other hand moved as quickly as it could to activate the masking of the plane, effectively dropping it from Overwatch's systems and ensuring you could make a quiet get away as Gabe roughly adjusted the controls. 

“Take a seat and hold tight, this is going to be a hard pivot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, watching this comment section very carefully after the madness thirsting for gabe's dick the last few days on my tumblr: (ง ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)=/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿̿̿ ̿ ̿̿ say it, i fucking dare you


	4. Sea Change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY, I guess 37 chapters of build up is enough, although I would LOVE to torture you all some more! (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖) Godspeed Reyes hoes!

The day you abandoned Overwatch was unlike any other in your life. The bizarre mix of nervousness flying into the blue skies of an unknown future and an uncontrollable happiness from new freedom bubbled up in the form of gasped giggles you hid behind your hand. Gabe would turn to you, pulling you to him, holding you in his lap, smiling lips kissing yours until he needed to adjust something on the control panel and you would climb back into the copilot’s chair hiding your excitement. Each time you kissed him was as if it was the first time, hands wrapping at your back holding you close, your fingers combing through curly and unruly hair. He kissed you with a passion you never knew could exist, leaning back afterwards to study your blushing face and watching you with loving half lidded eyes.

“Where do we go from here?” You asked him as the plane flew at top speed high over fluffy white clouds casting large shadows along far away land. His hand was in yours, fingers holding tight and his thumb rubbing small circles on your skin.

“We should keep a low profile for at least a couple days, once Jack realizes we’ve left I’m sure he’ll send extraction teams to all our last known locations.”

You chewed at the corner of your lip, shifting in your seat as you looked back to the navigation panel indicating your location was still being masked from any radar systems.

“Do you think he hates us?” You asked quietly, squeezing his hand as you brought it to your lips to kiss at scabbed over knuckles.

“No matter how hard you try, he would never be capable of hating you.” Gabe’s voice was soft, but you could hear the hint of sadness behind it.

You went quiet again, neither of you willing to push it past that, neither of you willing to bring up the pain you felt leaving behind someone who meant so much to either of you. He let go of your hand, leaning forward and unzipping his usual green hoodie, letting it fall to the back of his chair.

“This isn’t going to be easy.” He breathed out, pushing a hand through his curls. “Once we’ve done what we need to in order to take Talon down we’ll still be criminals. Neither of us will ever be able to return to a normal life if we make it out of this alive.”  

“Let’s focus on taking Talon down first, we need to come up with a plan to _stay_ alive.”

“I have us heading for a remote coast in Albania. We can stay there and figure out a plan, but-” He reached for you again, bringing you into his arms for another soft kiss. Your body twisted as you sat in his lap and placed gentle hands to his chest. “I want to be selfish for a few days and have you all to myself before we go back to Talon.”       

You felt your whole body blush, a natural reflex to hide your smile forced you to bury your face against his neck as he kept you in his arms. How you never noticed the size of his hands before was beyond you, they slipped down your side and rubbed beneath the hem of your combat shirt. His lips wandered across your cheek, down to your jaw, and to your ear with breathy chuckles. He rolled his back forward, hands gliding into your hair before bringing you back into a deep kiss.

“It’s strange to see you so shy.” He laughed, a big palm sliding to your cheek to hold you. “I’ve waited a long time to see you this happy, don’t hide it from me now.”

You smiled, leaning forward and pressing the tip of your nose to his. He waited patiently for you to fill the gap, to kiss him again and take his breath away, but you pulled back and fidgeted nervously with the pockets on your combat pants.

“Gabe, is there some part of you that still thinks you’re capable of hurting me?” You dropped your eyes to your hands, face looking away from his unable to bear cringe of pain that flashed in his own eyes by asking that.

“If I’m going to be honest with myself, yes.” He squeezed your side, laying his forehead to your shoulder with a long drawn out breath. “I never wanted to hurt you in the first place, but I couldn’t control myself then either. I know that’s… scary. If you ever have to walk away from me, I promise, I will understand.”     

You looked at him, head lulling to the side and a small sad smile on your lips. With a push from his lap you stood at his side and held your arms close to you for a moment in thought.

“Give me your hands.” You held both palms out open in front of him.

Slowly, the backs of his hands fell into your yours. You wrapped your fingers around his hands in a gentle touch and watched his face fall to helpless realization as you brought them to your neck.

“It’s okay.” You breathed out. “I told you before that I trust you, but I want you to understand that I trust you, _completely_. With my life, Gabe. Everything we do from here we do together and if we’re going to dismantle a terrorist organization, we have to trust each other entirely.”

You could feel him shaking as you pressed his hands to your throat. He stood, not to his full height, but enough that he wasn’t straining to reach. His mouth was open wanting to say something, but unable to form the words.

“I forgave you a long time ago, Gabe.”

“You’re too good to me.” He whispered, eyes unable to rip away from the sight of his fingers wrapping around you again.

You dropped your hands, letting him slowly feel comfortable enough to touch you like that on your own. His fingers twitched, unsure and testing pressure being put on you. He didn’t squeeze at first. No, first, fingers rested soft against the base of your neck and touched along invisible lines of where dark bruises used to cover you. Then, his fingers carefully squeezed. Not enough to cut off your air flow, not enough to scare you, but enough that he was gasping quietly as he was rubbing thumbs in circles against your skin. Sad eyes stared at his hands around your throat. Sad eyes slowly crept to all black voids and you pushed calm breaths out between parted lips, unfazed by the sight now.

“When I’m like this, I can still see where I hurt you.” He said quietly. “Like permanent bruises.”

His thumbs slid up, pushing at the edge of your jaw to lift your head. You watched him with heavy lids, a small smile creeping up on your lips as he leaned forward to press kisses to your throat and his hands fell to your collarbones. You felt like you would melt into him with each kiss across your neck. He was careful, but firm, following along the line of long ago bruises only he could see. You sighed, rubbing your hands up his chest and gripping at his shirt.

It felt like your bodies couldn’t get closer together, but you pulled at him in desperate need with each kiss that made your skin glow hotter with spreading blush. He was getting rougher, lips catching on your skin with desire and pressed against his body you could feel the response between his legs.

“Gabe-” You gasped out as he groaned through a kiss against your veins. “We need to land soon.”

He drew back, eyes still solid black but a sweet smile on his lips.

“I can’t begin to explain how much this means to me. How much _you_ mean to me.” His face moved to yours again, kissing you until you were smiling. “Round up anything with Overwatch or Blackwatch on it, we’re going to have to ditch anything that connects us to it.”  

He returned to his seat for the final descent back to earth as you braced yourself with handles through the cabin putting everything together. Gabe landed on grassy overhang next to the ocean. It was foggy and windy, but through the gray skies he lowered into you could see the turbulent waves crashing down on spiked rocky shores a long fall below.

You walked with him, arms holding every item of clothes bearing the familiar insignias, any last tie to your time with either organization for the last few years, carried to the cliff edge looking over the water as a cold sea breeze hit your skin. Gabe held the Talon uniforms from the black box in his arms and turned to look at you before reaching the edge. He carefully placed the pile next to his feet, you did the same, mixing together both facets of your lives in one heap.

“To new beginnings.” He said, picking up his formal jacket first and staring at it with just the smallest twinkle of sadness. With a big breath he balled it up and chucked it, as hard and as far as he could, over the cliff. It faded into the mist, the sounds of waves masking any splash the heavy jacket would have made.

You chewed at your lip, hands reaching for something you’d never imagine you’d be tossing into a choppy ocean. Fingers ran over broken seams and little holes on Morrison’s SEP shirt you’d worn to bed for years now. Gabe placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, stilling himself as you said a silent goodbye to the shirt in your mind. In your fist you balled the shirt up, eyes pointed to the great beyond with a fire in you. It was the same nervousness you once had when a blond commander was asking you to throw rocks through glass, a flood of adrenaline coursed through your blood and with all your might the shirt flew into the wind and out of your life forever.

With Gabe at your side you dumped away the last parts of your previous life. At first with hesitation, but then with chuckling vigor as he tossed things along with you. Gone, all of it would be gone, and you would become something more than just an agent, something more than just a captain with a contract.

By the end you were each laughing, practically cheering, until the last one was left. Your formal uniform, dark blue but Gabe’s Blackwatch band attached to the arm. You paused to run your fingers over it and he must have known it was important to you, his hands cradled yours before placing a kiss on your forehead.

“I wish we could keep it.” He tried to comfort you. “We just can’t risk it.”

“I know.” You finally breathed out, lifting your face to smile at him.

A final jolt of courage hit you, your arm tossing the bunched up uniform hard into the gray mist and you were left standing with Gabe on a lonely ocean cliff edge, his arm around your waist.

Even though it was scary and the future was unsure, you leaned against him and you weren’t frightened for what was to come.  

* * *

The first night you spent free from Overwatch you were sheltered in Gabe’s plane eating restocked MREs and making plans for a new uniform so you neither of you would have to wear any organizations colors ever again. From that moment on you were independent, the only rules you followed coming from your own mouths. You were going to take over the world together, and it started with military standard ready meals. The wind outside was dying down, cabin of the plane slowly heating from your body heat and laughter. Even though the food was awful, you couldn’t help but smile and wonder why you hadn’t just left from the beginning. Everything about being there just felt so _natural_. 

“Talon won’t ever see us coming.” Gabe threatened with a plastic fork waving in the air. “Between the two of us we have everything we need to take that whole damn place down. We’ll be unstoppable.”

You laughed through your food at the look of sheer determination on his face, eyes falling to the Reaper mask at his side.

“So now that we’ve thrown my mask and the Talon uniforms into the ocean, how are we going to hide my face?”

“We can go to the same place in Italy where I got mine made. The guy is discrete and quick, we can be back up and running in no time.”

With the final bites of food he gathered up the remnants of the ready meals and pushed them out of the way to help you to your feet. He was smiling, not a toothy smile, but just enough to push his smile lines up his cheeks and curve over old scars. You hopped up on your tippy toes and kissed the tip of his nose making him laugh and his cheeks flush with a pink tint.

“No more Talon talk for the rest of the night.” He decided, snaking an arm around your waist to hold you close to him in a warm hug. His hands fell to yours and he gently pulled you to the door. “Let’s head up to the top.”

You grabbed the blanket and left with him. Big hands helped you to the roof of the plane, he helped you spread the blanket over the metal and you helped yourself to laying your head against his chest just as you had in the desert. Now, under the night sky with clear stars and nearby waves crashing to shore, there was a peace you felt as the day closed and you survived leaving an organization that had changed you permanently. A burst of wind grazed along your skin, and now no longer in the warmth of the plane you quickly came to realize being down to just your undershirt and shorts sent a cold chill over you and you cuddled up against him with a shiver.

Gabe’s hand was running over the scars on your arm as you held him, fingers gentle as they passed over raised skin, a happy noise escaped him as you wiggled closer.

“Have I ever told you how I got the long scar on my face?” He asked you with a smile.

“The one on your cheek? No.” You lifted your head to look at him, to examine the deep mark in the moonlight.

“After SEP I was a captain and on the first mission I ever led by myself. I was scared out of my mind thinking I was going to mess something up, that I was going to get someone killed, so I was doing everything by the book. It went great until we found our target, out of his mind, brandishing a hunting knife in one hand and a grenade in the other, threatening to blow my whole team away.”

“Fuck-”

“He was wiry and a ticking time bomb, and you know me, I tend to not really say the right things at the right times and I said something that set the guy off. Went ballistic, started slashing around with the knife, waving the grenade in the air with one finger ready to pull the chord. I didn’t think we’d make it out of there alive.”

“So did you end up getting it because of the knife, or did he blow everything up?”

“Well that’s the thing. Jack was on my team, he was able to talk the guy down. That’s something he was always better than I was, talking to people, empathizing with them. I could tell he was scared, though. But he did it. He got the guy to lower his weapons, got him to surrender. Took him _four hours.”_

Gabe ran his fingers through your hair as you shifted be closer to him.

“So we get him all the way back to the drop ship, and Jack gets on his high horse and starts bragging. He’s got the defused grenade in one hand, the guys knife in the other and he’s reenacting the situation to the pilot but he wasn’t looking where he was swinging the damn thing.”

“No. Fucking. Way-” You laughed, hiding your smiling against his chest.

“And he swings it, right at me. Two quick swipes and he wasn’t even looking. That damn idiot almost cut my eye out and he just freezes and looks like he’s about to start crying.”

You sat up, pushing yourself to look at the scars in disbelief. You fingers trailed the scars just under his right eye, following the curves that you’d seen so many times but never questioned.

“I never let him live it down. Best part was seeing him on vomit duty for a month afterwards, I was all bandaged up and laughing at him the whole time.”

“It seems he has a problem with leaving scars on people.” You chuckled, genuinely tickled by Gabe’s story. “Well, what about this one?” Your finger traced to a small scar on the left of his nose.

“You don’t… remember?” He sat up, taking you with him until he was up right and your face was close to his still with a finger pressed to the scar.

“What?” You questioned in confusion.

“You threw your medical chart at me.” He lifted an eyebrow and turned his head just a little to give you a better look at it. “That morning when Moira and I… well, threatened you. Understandably you were upset, and you couldn’t speak because of what I did, so you threw the screen with your records on it. Left a nasty cut and gave me the worst bloody nose I’ve ever had.”

“Oh.” You breathed out. The memory of that day was coming back to you, the memory of how absolutely livid you were. It was the day Genji gave you his knives, the day he realized something was _very_ wrong. “Sorry, Gabe.”

A gust of wind whipped through the open field and sent a shiver up your spine, you squeezed your fingers against him.

“Don’t be. I deserved much worse than just a scar.” His mouth moved to your fingers, kissing the cold digits before he shifted to place himself behind you, legs on either side of you, wrapping his body around to keep you warm.

You curled your knees to your chest, head leaned back against him and eyes to the stars. So much had changed.

Gabe was gathering your hair to one side of your head before leaning forward to return his lips to the soft spot of your neck. He kissed at you carefully, almost as if he was testing to see how far he would let you go, but you rolled your head to the side and let a quiet moan escape your lips and it was carried away by the sea breeze. 

“I’m so thankful that after everything I’ve done you’re still willing to be at my side.” He whispered against you between kisses. His hands roamed down your arms, over your wrists and your fingers, to the tops of knees and teasing along goosebumped skin on the tops of your thighs.  

“Gabe-” You breathed out, suddenly very aware of how hard you were blushing. “I wasn’t trying to stop you this morning when I accidentally hit you. I was trying to kiss you.”

A growling chuckle pressed to your skin that made you gasp, his hips grinded against your lower back and you could feel him, half hard rubbing along your spine making you melt further into his touch. You were leaned heavy against him, your back to his chest and you could feel every deep breath he took shuddering behind you.

Even against the cold air, it felt like your body was on fire. Maybe he thought you were shivering from the cold, but you were trembling, wanting so badly to continue what he had started.

"Are you still confused about your feelings?" His voice was low. Your leg fell to the side as his hand dipped low, fingers wandering across your inner thigh until he was slipping beneath your shorts to the front of your panties. Your body pulsed with anticipation, skin tingling under his touch and a deep throb at your inner core. He was good with those big hands, making you blush and giggle, your body was pleading to let him throw you over the edge. "If you're still confused, I can help you figure them out." 

You could feel how wet you were just against the fabric as his fingers slid over you, the heavy puffs of air leaving his lips were hot and teasing along the skin of your neck as he hovered his mouth just off of you. A second chance at your morning, a moment alone and idle conversation was all it took to make you weak in the knees for him. You knew how you felt about him. He knew how you felt about him. But you both left it unsaid.    

“Gabriel-” You moaned out and you felt _exactly_ what that did to him. Against your lower back his cock was twitching to life and pressing hard against you. Feeling him growing only made your blood run warmer and your cheeks burn brighter. His fingers pushed harder against you, dipping between covered folds and circling at a clit begging to be touched. You squirmed, legs squeezing together with his hand between them and a whine leaving you. 

“I want to touch you.” He groaned, even though he already was. Big fingers were running along the outside of your panties feeling the fabric pulled taut against you and he knew he was teasing you but he liked to see you write into his touch. He could almost certainly feel how wet you were already, he could tell how much you wanted this just by the way you were panting at the barely there glides over your covered folds and the way you were rolling your hips with his hand. Gabe was hard, so hard it almost hurt, when your body returned pressing back against him.

“Please-” You started, breathless and begging, head falling back against him as your eyes fluttered. “Fuck. Please, Gabe, I want you to touch me. I need you.”  

"Well," He laughed and rutted against your back again. Hand slowly slipping out of pants as he kissed to your ear and bit gently at your ear. "I was going to make you beg, but since you asked so sweetly-" 

He hooked his hands at your knees and spread your legs wide, moving either leg to the outside of his, hooking them over his big thighs so he could keep your legs open with just his knees. You felt so exposed like this, even with your clothes still on, he had you open from him and he was in control behind you. Once he was satisfied you couldn't close your thighs, you heard a low grumble against your ear and felt the hand return, this time rougher and more needy than before, fingers slipping beneath panties and running along your clit sending a hot shiver across your body. He was so warm and even though his hands were rough they were careful not to hurt you. His fingers were teasing, running along folds making you squirm and whine. He was purposefully avoiding dipping in, only touching you enough to make your body beg for more. Knowing he was keeping you open, your legs unable to close with ease sent heat straight to your core.

“The noises you make are so pretty.” He whispered low against your hair as he buried his face in it.

Lips landed on the base of your neck again, kisses pressing up the side of your throat carefully, each one calculated and precise. Your nails dug into the outsides of his thighs, curling in on him and he grunted, at first you thought in pain, but the swell at your back told you otherwise. A thick finger curled into you, the new feeling more than enough to make you gasp and stretch into the cold air. His hands were _big_. 

While he started pumping with that finger, his other hand slipped beneath your undershirt. He grabbed at your chest, squeezing and rolling your hard nipples between his fingers. Your legs were shaking the natural reflex to close them together stopped by his own powerful legs making him smile against your skin with messy kisses anywhere his mouth would reach. The thoughts of him sneaking off to the bathroom in plane, of him sleeping with woman and putting them on top of him the same way you had been- it was all rushing back to you and make your core pulse just thinking about it.  

“Do you-” You gasped when be brushed along nerves on your walls sending your legs into an uncontrollable shaking mess. “Do you really think about that night?”

“God, yes.” He moaned, fingers getting rougher, a second joining to scissor in you and stretch at your entrance. “I’ve tried so hard not to but-”

“I’ve thought about it too.” You blurted out when he curled against a particularly sensitive area and it felt like fire burst through your veins. You panted as you leaned back harder against him giving in to the fingers pumping you and working you into a frenzy. Every now and then the thought had crept into your mind, the image of an almost naked Gabe hard between your legs and a hand at your throat. You'd always shut it down, but it was more than you'd like to admit that you'd thought about it while your eyes were closed and Morrison was grabbing handfuls of you as he brought you to moaning orgasms.  

You wanted to touch Gabe. You wanted to feel with your own hands how big he was. With determination, or as much as you could muster as fingers worked you open, your arm twisted around behind you at an uncomfortable angle, pushing down with clumsy fingers at the front of his pants. His cock landed hard and warm against your lower back, your fingers struggled around it but he didn’t seem to find the awkwardness of it all. It was difficult to find the right angle, but you also realized it wasn't just that, your hand was unable to wrap completely around him and that forced a low nervous laugh from you that shifted into a pleading moan. 

He nudged at your face with his, bringing you in for a heated kiss. It was sloppy and desperate as your chest rolled into his hand and his legs stiffened to keep yours apart. He kissed you as fingers swirled, kissed you until you were panting, as your sweat beaded across your skin meeting the chilly air. You were so close, but you didn’t want this to just be about you.

Your hand left him, moving instead to grip with his while he pinched at a nipple. Mouths parted when you dropped the back of your head to his chest again with heavy contentment. You smiled to yourself, grabbing and gliding his willing hand to your throat and you felt his entire body buckle against you.

He didn’t put any pressure, just you moving his hand there was more than enough to get him to shaking pleasure with his fingers working away in your panties. You were sure he wasn’t even meaning to stretch your legs so far apart, but his were dropping to the sides lost in his own fantasies. He slid in and out of you, thumb brushing against your clit again and again until he found just the right tempo to make your mind go white with pleasure. 

You came to a moaning orgasm as waves crashed onto the rocks below the cliff side sending mist over your bodies. His name escaped you as fingers held loosely at your throat and curled deep within you as your walls pulsed around him. He was swelling at your back, lips kissing hard at the side of your neck, he was saying something under his breath but you were too lost in your own lust to even comprehend it.    

Riding down from a natural high unlike any you’d ever experienced by playing with yourself, you were coming to the realization that your shirt was sticking to the skin of your back and Gabe was still breathing hard behind you.

“I-I'm so sorry, I've never-” He was panting and it dawned on you that he came against your back without even touching himself, just the feeling of you around his fingers and the moans from your throat were enough to send the strongest commander you knew into an unstoppable fit of pleasure along with you. His face was still against your neck, burning warm with blush that you could feel against your skin.  

“Don't apologize.” You sighed and rolled your spine against him. His fingers were slowly pulling from you, careful around twitching walls and rubbing past numbed nerves. As he pulled them from your panties you could see the sheen on his fingers reflecting in the moonlight and nothing ever seemed quite this lewd as he twisted his wrist around to look at the shining digits.

A low grumble came from, one that quickly turned into a lusty chuckle. He brought his fingers up, past you, to his face and you twisted your neck up watching with half lidded eyes as Gabe sucked the two fingers between his lips and groaned deep in his throat. Little noises escaped between laps of his tongue around the digits and a wicked smile crossed his face when his hand fell back to your open legs to rest.

“I’ve spent so long happy with you just sleeping on my couch.” His hips shifted and you sighed realizing although he’d already found his release, he was still hard against you. “Never in a million years did I think we’d ever be here.”

You grabbed his hand, head still swimming, and a heat still burning in you for something more. Your fingers laced with his, holding him tight as you arched your back and turned to whisper up towards his ear.

“It’s too cold out here.” Your voice was breathy, close to begging. “We’re not done yet.”

He hid a happy chuckle, arms circling around you into a tight hug before he lifted you as he stood. Before you could catch a glimpse he pulled his pants back around him, hiding away the culprit for the mess on your back. You hadn't realized your legs were still wobbly, your body leaning towards him for support, moving together to carefully slide off the side of the ship and down into the wet grassy field. He stayed hard beneath his clothes, either purposefully ignoring or too embarrassed to address it. You bit your tongue and held back a desire to tease him about it until he closed the plane door with a dull thud and turned to face you in all of his blushing glory. 

"Be honest with me, have you ever had anyone not able to handle you?" You smiled, eyeing at his pants, peeling off your undershirt and semi covering your bare chest with your arms. 

"A few, yeah." He spoke to the floor, rips rolling between teeth as he removed his own undershirt. "We don't have to do this, if you think it'll be too much." 

"Don't get cocky now, I can handle a big boy." You side eyed him with a tongue poking between your lips, fingers hooked in your shorts and pulling them down until they fell at your ankles. He was partially turned away, eyes avoiding you like they had so many times when you'd changed in front of each other. His expression changed from embarrassment to smirking, hands pushing down his own pants and he sprung from them, cock throbbing into the air before he came towards you to cup your face. You let your chin rest against his palms, eyes closing in the happiness of feeling him just touch you. 

He chuckled and you felt a hand drop, fingers slipping between your legs and easily past your entrance.

"Whatever you say." He dropped his voice next to your ear. You gasped as a second finger roughly pushed in to join the first, not intent on going deep, only stretching you open. You fell forward against his arm, gripping onto hard muscles for balance as he rolled the fingers around you. His other hand fell to the backs of your shoulders, rubbing in comforting circles until you were shaking with anticipation and unable to stand without the support of leaning against his body. He kissed along the side of your face as he helped you to the ground of the plane, blanket loosely thrown beneath you. 

He placed himself between your legs, your back resting to the ground and fingers digging into your sides as you hugged at yourself. He ran soothing hands along the insides of your thighs, staring between your legs with a hunger you'd never seen before, eyes flickering up to meet yours. The hands wandering your thighs circled around to your hips, roughly grabbing you and pulling you towards him until your lower half was elevated and he was lined at your entrance. His thumbs massaged against your folds and you threw an arm over your face as every pass over your clit made you twitch with need against him. 

"I'm ready, Gabe. _Please."_

He made a pleased noise before stretching your lips open and sliding his tip against you. Your legs were shaking but you were confident, he was big but you were used to super solider. He sank forward and you gasped from deep in your chest. 

“W-wait-” You spoke with an urgency bordering on panic as he pushed in.

“You okay? Am I hurting you?” He froze, hands quick to move to your hips and hold them hovering in the air so you wouldn't fall further onto him. 

“I'm okay-” You breathed out, this was unlike anything you'd ever taken before. “I just um- I- I need a second. You're... really big.” You felt silly even saying it out loud. He wasn’t just _big_ , he was pushing you past your limits and stretching you beyond and it felt _so good_ but it was blinding you. You were eating your own words. Above you he was blushing, cheeks burning with fever and he was waiting with just his tip pushed in you.

“Do you-” He was speaking like he was catching his breath. “Do you want me to take it out?”

“No-” You adjusted your hips sliding him in just a little more until the thickest point of his tip was in and caught your breath gasping out with a high moan. “No, just, we need to go slow. I think.”

You’d never felt more embarrassed during sex in your life and it hadn’t even really started yet. He was throbbing in you, making your cheeks burn even more and his arms were shaking as held you. Gabe was biting his lower lip and holding back a nervous chuckle, but you could feel the swell in you. He liked hearing how _big_ he was.

The way he rocked into you was slow. He took his time. Hands wandering across the outside of your legs, fingers gripping into every inch of skin as he methodically thrusted forward into you with the movements of someone who was trying to savor every moment. Every push past what you were used to, every inch filling you and pressuring your walls it was driving you crazy. You could feel every movement, every pulse, it felt like you could feel the blood pumping through him as he methodically slid in. He would reach a point and make your legs twitch with pleasure, then slowly pull out before sliding in just a little further. Again and again he gently opened you, each time waiting until you made little moans and curses under your breath to tell him it was feeling good. 

“You’re taking me so well.” He whispered down to you, praise that both surprised and delighted you making your body rush with heat. He sighed and threw his head back pushing into you again, your body almost able to take all of him. "Oh, listen to you. Touch yourself for me, I want to hear more." 

You slipped a hand down your body, first letting your fingers brush against your stretched entrance and his cock gliding into you, then to your clit. Your fingertip rolled against your clit, already swelling from being played with and now from the mind numbing experience of being stretched like this, your body was sensitive and all too responsive to the light touches. As he got deeper he held your knees apart, overjoyed at the sight of you like this, at the desperate little noises you were making. He was teasing by the time he was able to fully bury himself, knowing he could push all the way but letting your hips squirm against his to try and take the rest of him. You were begging under your breath, cheeks blushed and body wanting nothing more than for him to take you like you knew he wanted to. 

Once he was fully in you, hips flush against yours, he fell forward. He held your face with both hands, mouth open in a silent smiling gasp overwhelmed with happiness.

“Gabe-” You breathed out before he pressed his lips to yours in a selfish kiss. Even pressed as far in you as he could he rocked his hips to make sure you continued to give him every gasp he could get out of you. 

“Say my name again.”

“Gabriel-” You moaned, intending to add on to the sentence, but cut off with another deep kiss. He kissed you like this would be the only chance he had, like this would be the last time, kissing you with the taste of salty tears but he smiling, laughing even, as he held you and watched you squirm against him.

“I’ve waited so long for this, do you know that?”

"You're not acting like it." You whined with breathless words.

You watched him holding back a cocky smile, all too happy to give you what you wanted after years of pining, years of thinking dirty guilty things about you, years of following in your footsteps content just to make you smile. Still in you, he adjusted his hips so most of his weight landed on his knees. Big hands wrapped at your rib cage, holding you like a handle to help him drive into you with the lust of someone who had been denied these feelings for far too long. With every pump he was swelling in you more, every hilting movement that kept you full threatened to drive you over the edge with even the slightest touch. 

You were lost in him, hands gripped back behind you into the blanket, moans turning into aching cries for release. He never wanted to stop. You never wanted to stop. Even when your limbs were numbing and your hips tightening thinking you wouldn't be able to handle him any more, he continued in you and held tightly to your body. Through thrusts and deep aches he brought your hand back to your clit, watching with lowered eyes and encouraging you on until you were shaking and coming undone around him for the second time that night. A coil of heat burst in you, more intense than it had with just his fingers, ripping through your veins and making your mind soar far beyond the plane into the stars above dark clouds outside. 

Even through this he kept going.

"Don't tap out yet, I know you can take more than that." He teased, driving into you.

He was sweating down on you, smiling with blown out pupils, grunting and moving in you before quickly flipping you around and handling your hips into the air. You felt weak on your knees, upper half bobbing against the messied blanket as your fingers curled into white fisted knuckles and you moaned his name between curses into the floor. Through a lust filled daze your eyes caught the clock and registered how long his stamina was lasting him and you understood why your body was feeling like jelly in his hands. 

"Fuck-" He panted above you. Everything felt like it was buzzing, your blood, your brain, your voice. Your head felt light, almost unable to take it. You were gasping even in your mind, _fuck_ , you should have let him tease you more, should have let him ready you more but you always bit off more than you can chew. Too eager to finally have the feeling of Morrison's hands off your body, too excited at the thrill of fucking another super solider, too lost in the happiness of having someone who cared so deeply for you giving you the type of attention you'd always denied you wanted. Between your legs you knew you felt swollen, already aching from overuse but you were burning, stomach hurting for one last release he'd built you up to.   

"Kiss-" You panted out, almost unable to think of the rest of the sentence. He slowed just enough to lean forward and listen to you. "Kiss me, Gabe please. Kiss me here." Lazy fingers trailed along the front of your throat and you felt the deep heavy pulse press in you. His hand ran along your spine in a soothing motion.

"I'll cum if I do that. I still want you on top of me." His voice was sweet, but partially realizing he may have pushed you to your limit. You hummed into the floor.

"I can't- I can't handle much more." You pulled your hips away from his hands, dropping them to the floor. He watched you with gentle eyes as you struggled to flip yourself back around to face him. "You do realize anyone else would have probably passed out by now? Just because I have your blood in my veins doesn't mean I have your stamina." The hands holding him hovered above you bent to let him push into your swollen entrance again. 

"Be a good girl and make those noises for me again, yeah? I'm almost there." His voice faded against your skin as kisses pressed along your neck and you let out a drawn out moan. He pushed hard into you making your body bounce back. "That's it." Again, a hard thrust that made you gasp and whine until you were shaking and digging nails into his back. "A little more." His voice had never sounded like this and the groans that left him between rough kisses, between little bites to your throat were what sent you over.

"Gabe!" You gasped as your third orgasm hit. Your legs were shaking but he held them tight around his hips. He kissed at your neck, thrusts hard and so deep until you were panting open mouthed and slack jawed in complete over stimulation. "Fuck, Gabriel." You sighed and that was it for him.

The swell that filled you so completely pulled just before he came in long warm ropes pressing against your hips and covering each of you as bodies pressed together. It was more than you anticipated, especially after he'd already released against your back earlier in the night. He didn't seem to care that he was making a mess of either you, instead the mouth at your neck went to meet your lips and kissed you between his own groans as he writhed against your body.

When he was done he stilled, laying heavy on you for a few moments, just catching his breath and kissing you between passing seconds. When he had the energy to lift his head he looked to you, your eyes heavy with exhaustion, mind barely hanging on to the moment before he kissed you, softer than before and lifted himself to give you a bit of breathing room. 

"Do you want some help standing up to go get cleaned off?" He chuckled, face grimacing when he realized _just_ how messy you both were. 

"Gabriel?" You breathed out, throwing an arm over your eyes, body too numb to do anything else. "Good night." 

He thought you were joking, but your mind checked out. Too much. It was too good, he was too much all at once, and in the morning you'd _definitely_ be grilling him about every last fantasy you were sure he was too nervous to tell you about the first time sleeping together. But for now, the last thing your body registered before passing out completely was him laughing and soft lips as a kiss on your cheek.  


	5. Fate

“Morning.” Gabe’s voice was so gentle, a smile obvious even behind your closed eyes. You smiled too, unable to pretend like you were still asleep after hearing him and cracked open an eye to see him.

He was sat in front of you smiling like a fool but he had heavy bags under his eyes. As you pushed yourself up you slowly realized you were sleeping on the cot, nowhere near where you passed out on the floor last night and you were _so warm_  He’d stacked the standard Overwatch pillows beneath your head, his below yours to give you extra fluff and support. Both blankets were laid across you, and you were back in your undershirt but you also felt loose soft sweatpants around your legs and wool socks that were much too big on your feet. You bit back a smile realizing he'd gone to excessive lengths to wrap you up while you slept to ensure you'd be warm and laughed to yourself, shimmying your way from beneath the blankets to sit up. As you moved, it suddenly hit you how _sore_ everything was. An unintentional moan left you when bruised inner thighs brushed together, which you quickly tried to hide with a nervous laugh as your body collapsed back to the cot in a jolt of pain, legs twitching and shaking from even the slightest movements threatening to send you to your knees if you tried to stand.

He had a shy but clearly mischievous smile, trying to hide his coy happiness seeing your reaction to feeling the aftereffects. You rolled your eyes and gave him a mocking glare. 

"Wipe that shit eating grin off your your face-" 

“Here, you need this.” He cut you off and held out his bottle.

You accepted with a shaking hand and gulped down more water than you intended too, drinking for much longer than either of you expected. You drank until the metal bottle was empty and you gasped out for air, body realizing just how dehydrated you were as soon as you were done and ending with airy pants from an open mouth. He looked at you, stunned almost but a hint of pink rising in his cheeks.

“Thanks, Gabe.” You said through big breaths.

“Can I kiss you again?” He was full on blushing, hand curling over yours around the bottle as he moved it away from your face.

You leaned in to him, ignoring the aches across your body begging you not to move, answering his question with as much of a passionate kiss as you could manage after just waking up. His hand fell to your leg over the blanket, rubbing from your knee up to your hip and he smiled as he touched you even through the layers and layers of thick fabric. He gripped into you holding you close, pulled you in deeper, fingers sneaking to the back of your head and tangling with your hair. It was obvious he wanted to take things further. He wanted you, he wanted more, more, more, but you just wanted to make sure he was doing okay after you'd passed out so quickly. You parted from him, studying his face and how his expression held to a lingering smile.

“Did you sleep at all last night?” You asked mostly as a joke, only because of how exhausted he looked. Your fingers fell to his cheeks and thumbs ran over the scars on his face. He leaned back, expression changing to something close to shame and combed fingers through your hair as he mulled over his thoughts.

“I thought that maybe…” A moment to think led to him placing a kiss at the end of your nose, your face burned with blush at the loving gesture and you tried to hide your cheeks beneath the blankets, twisting your brows in concern. There was something behind his eyes, something hurting. “I was afraid if I went to sleep I would wake up and this would have all been a dream."

“Oh, Gabe.” You sighed, gripping a fist full of blanket over your heart. “I’m so sorry, I should have stayed awake so we could talk about everything-”

"It's okay, I know I'm not dreaming." He let out a little laugh and looked so deeply into your eyes. "I'm way too happy for this to be a dream." 

"Come here." You whispered.

You knew his dreams were bad, but a comment like that stuck needles right into your heart and dug around. You shifted as carefully as you could to give him room on the cot to sit next to you. He smiled, leaning forward again to place a kiss on your forehead and tucking messy slept in hair behind your ear. Your heart was pounding in your chest every time he touched you, the brushes against your skin still so new and making you nervous. With tired eyes he looked at you like he would never look away again. 

"Let's have breakfast outside." His fingers laced with yours in a gentle attempt to pull you from the cot.

"Don't let this inflate your ego, but I don't think I can stand let alone _walk_ after what we did last night." You couldn't even say that without blushing. Immediately he was leaning over you with a lusty growl and slipping strong arms beneath the blankets to wrap around your waist. You squealed as he gently pulled your hips up off the bed towards his body. He was surrounding you, muscles swallowing you up and you couldn't help but run your hands over his chest as he brought you close. 

"If you don't get up I'm going to carry you out of here myself." 

“You are _not_ going to carry me.” You gripped your hands around his arms at your waist in defiance and he looked to you with both disapproving and glittering eyes. “So help me Gabriel, I see the way you’re looking at me. If you pick me up anyways I will call Overwatch myself-”

You let out a strained scream as he scooped you up with one arm and tossed you over his shoulder, gathering MREs and a blanket in the other hand and carrying you out the plane door. In the movement the oversized socks fell from your feet and his loose sweatpants at your hips slipped down your body landing at the tops of your thighs exposing panties he also must have put on you sometime in the night. Beating fists against his back you tried to fight back through laughter and gasps of twitching pain between your legs, but he just chuckled as you weakly fought him. 

“You were saying?”

“Gabriel Reyes! Put! Me! Down!”

“I will! _Eventually_.” The hand keeping you steady on his shoulder slid to hold you by the backs of your thighs as he stepped down from the short ramp into the coastal sunlight and you gripped into his undershirt trying to pretend like you weren’t enjoying every second of this. He gave you teasing pats against the backs of your legs that made you bury your cheeks against his shirt. His facial hair tickled the exposed skin on your thigh as he twisted his face against you and placed little kisses on the outside of your thighs, fingers grazing up just a little too far up to be unintentional touching the outside of your panties making you gasp and grip into his shirt harder. What a sight the two of you must have been, him parading you across grass with pants half off and him down to his undershirt and briefs.    

Despite your protests, he took you near the cliff edge. Far enough to be away from the shadow of the plane, but close enough to feel mists rising up on you from particularly high crests below and feel a warm sea breeze rolling over your skin. Above the sun was shining through bright white clouds and you closed your eyes to take in the moment and just breathe the air as someone brand new. Your body was relaxing draped over his shoulder as you opened your eyes to watch blades of grass moving in gentle wind behind Gabe's footsteps. From here it almost felt like you and Gabe were the only two people on earth, everything felt so calm compared to the fighting and bloodshed from the last few months.

He knelt and carefully lowered you off his shoulders onto the blanket in the grass, gentle so he wouldn’t hurt your already sore body. You let out a happy sigh and adjusted your hips against the soft ground, content as he pulled the loose sweatpants back up to their proper place. Laid out on your back, you watched the clouds rolling across the sky and untangled your hair with slow combing fingers. The ache you felt between your legs was new, not quite painful, but not exactly pleasant. For as much as your body felt like one gigantic bruise, your cheeks brightened with the thought of what he would make you feel when he wasn't holding himself back, when he wasn't being overwhelmingly loving and gentle. Just the thought of riling him up and having him press you to the cot after a long day of flying and having him take out his frustrations by burying himself in you- the mental picture that  caused you made you bite your lip to hold back a gasp.  

Head turned to watch him, he still had a smile still lingering on his lips as he started with the MREs. Exhausted eyes would flicker to check on you as he opened the packages and warmed the food.

“I promise one day I’ll take you somewhere with nicer food... on an actual date.” He rolled his lips between his teeth in thought. 

“This is perfect, Gabe.” You laughed. He seemed to laugh to, but you reached out a hand and squeezed his leg. 

While the food was warming he talked about one day taking you to a resturant his father used to take his mother to all the time back home in Los Angeles. He made you laugh and smile and gave you every detail of a date both of you knew you could never go on. He still knew most of the menu by heart, listing off the entrees in order of tastiest to 'good, but not the best'. He told you all about it until the conversation fizzled down to a lingering feeling of emptiness. Two recognizable AWOL Overwatch agents wouldn't exactly be unnoticed if they went to sit down in a crowded resturant, but it was nice to imagine a normal life for a fleeting moment.  

He handed you the warmed food and you leaned forward to kiss his knuckle before taking it from him. he helped you sit up, leaned your shoulders against him and you looked to the rocky cliff edge hanging over an endless blue ocean as you ate. The food was bad, but the effort, the company- that you wouldn't change in any way. During the meal you started discussing ways to take down Talon. First step was getting the new mask for you along with new combat outfits. Together, you would infiltrate Talon and remove those in power, he vowed to make it _personal_ after the crusade to stop Talon took such a significant toll on both of you. 

"I want to be the one to kill Tishler." You said with a thousand yard stare recalling all the 'gifts' he'd sent you. "I want him to know it's me ending his life." 

"We need to plan it out if you're going to do this. I don't want you killing him in the heat of a moment and ending up like me." 

"I'll plan it with you Gabe, but I'm warning you right now, if I see the opportunity I'm going to take it. Him and all of his little lackeys should be scared I'm coming after them." You set down the now empty plastic container of food, turning to gauge his reaction. He was biting the corner of his lip, fingers pulling at his mustache in thought. He wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure how to. You nudged him afraid he'd tell you not to follow what your heart to you to do.  

"There's something you need to know before we head back there." His face looked gravely serious and you shifted unsure what else there could possibly be. "Moira has been working for Talon, she has been for a while. I spotted her at their HQ when I was casing the base and she was the one who gave me the information to kill the Talon leaders."   

"She-" You curled your fists in your lap, you had no right to feel this betrayed and confused. "She's been working with Talon- she-" Why did it feel like you had been punched in the gut? 

"I went there to kill her for doing what she did to you, but it didn't take me long to realize she was much more useful alive than she was dead. She ended up telling me everything she knows about the leadership, she's been working closely with Tishler to create a new super soldier serum for Talon agents but is clearly was only doing it because it gives her the access to continue her own research." 

"Moira can't be-" You were muttering in a state of disbelief.

"She asked me not to tell you. As aloof as she is, I think she cares about what you think of her. But, I think you would be much more upset if you found out in person that she was working with them." 

You leaned back heavy on your hands pressing into the blanket as loud breaths pushed through your nose trying to calm yourself down. You were angry, or hurt, or some weird mix of emotions you could quite place that made you want to scream curses into the sea salt wind. Gabe stilled to watch you, to watch the way you bit at the inside of your cheeks and the frown pointed down at your toes tapping in the air. He wrapped an arm over your shoulders and pulled you against him in a forceful side hug before placing a kiss on the top of your hair. Arms crossed in front of you there was a moment where you tried to protest but being up against him almost made you melt into his body. 

"With her there, we had an ally if things go sideways. Once Tishler is out of the way we just have to get that girlfriend of his out of the picture too, then Moira can take his place and we can start gaining control over Talon." All the pieces were falling in place, the reasons why he was able to rise to power so quickly. She was there, helping from the background and you never knew. "Are you prepared to do whatever it takes, even if that means hurting Arntz?" He spoke softly, but his words had a sense of finality to them. 

"I don't want to, but if I have to I will." You buried your face against his chest, body twisting and aches between your legs sending twitches across your body. With a sigh, you pushed yourself from him, lifting your face to look into heavy bagged eyes. He shouldn't be making any plans when he's this sleep deprived. "You need sleep." 

He didn't fight when you gently pushed his chest forcing him to the ground with you. His arm around your shoulders, you curled against him, head resting on his chest and listening to a quick heartbeat. Fingers rubbed in little circles, roving over your skin lazily as the wind brushed between touches giving you goosebumps. Your fingers wandered from his chest to his side, holding him tight and making him sink further to the ground in happiness.  

“Sleep.” You demanded with a smile. “I promise I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

The hand at your skin slowed until it was still and just barely touching you. His breathing and heart rate evened out, a calmness washing over each of you as you laid together. He really must have stayed up all night to make sure you were okay, it seemed almost as if the moments his eyes closed for longer than it took to blink he had drifted off to sleep. As he slept little strings of smoke rose into the wind, you nuzzled closer to him and raked fingers in the air above through it. Smoke that once scared you into paralyzing fear you were now finding comfort in and something about it felt _right_. He wasn't broken or sick, this was just a part of him and it was a part you liked. Stomach full and skin warmed by the sun, body still feeling the aftereffects of sex with him, you closed your eyes and feel asleep to the sound of his heartbeat. 

It must have been late afternoon when you felt him moving beneath you. You fluttered your eyes open as he was stretching out his chest and trying to silently yawn. Your eyes fell from the dimming sky to his briefs just below where your hand was resting on his abs.Fingers followed hard lines on his stomach over his shirt as you stared down at his bulge pushing against the dark fabric and wondered _how in the hell_ you'd never noticed his size before. Of course, you'd never seen him as hard as he was now prior to sleeping with him, so you'd had no reason to look before. His stomach jumped when your hand moved, breathing hitching as fingers slid down to follow along his length.  

"I must still be dreaming." He chuckled, a low moan slipping from his lips. 

You hand grew bolder, slipping beneath his waistband to grip him and your body rolled against his as you circled fingers around him but unable to meet fingertips together. Between lazy exploitative pumps he let out grunts and groans that made your whole body burn. You were sure this was torture for him, to be touched so gently and carefully, but he gripped into the blanket and let you clumsily push your hand over him again and again until he was moving his hips with each one in and effort to get more of you. His hand wrapped around yours, helping you find a pace he wanted after the slow movements went on for far too long. He was so hard against your palm, the noises from his throat igniting a fire in you like nothing else. 

It didn't take long for him to start pulling at your pants with a lusty growl. His body turned over onto yours, fingers hooking into the loose sweatpants and the edge of your panties, ripping them from your body until they were piled at your feet. Even though you were pushing through the dull pain you were moaning right along with him as he leaned forward to bring you into a heated kiss when he pulled off his own underwear before spreading your legs and placing himself between them. The bit lips and needy laughs came to a standstill as he froze and stared at you like he'd never seen a woman before. You sat up in confusion to stare at him. 

"I am _so sorry."_   He breathed out with eyes glued between your legs. "You- Wow, I didn't realize I was actually bruising you. Oh no, look how swollen you are still-" He was almost whispering and carefully ran fingers up the sides of your inner thighs until he was gliding along your slit. His eyes flickered to yours as he brought a finger to his mouth and wet it with a quick suck in his own mouth. You put your own hands to your cheeks, hiding blush as he tested a finger at your entrance. With even the slightest prod your whole body reflexed in on itself and immediately your legs were shaking beyond anything you were able to control because of a dull, but powerful, pain- and he was only past his fingernail. "You're way too sore to be doing this right now, I'll only hurt you." 

"That's so unfair." You whined as you squirmed against him. "Maybe we could just be careful?" 

"Absolutely not." He was scolding you with a laugh behind it. "As much as I want this too, I want you to _enjoy_ it. Ripping apart your insides doesn't exactly sound appealing." 

He was gentle pulling the tip of his finger out but even just that pressure was enough to make your stomach clench in pain. You breathed out a long sigh. You were supposed to have super solider blood in your veins, it was almost upsetting something like this would knock you on your ass for the day. It was upsetting, but also making you burn with even more desire for him thinking what you'd feel like if he kept going like he wanted to the night before. He must have saw the bitter let down written across your face, with a low chuckle he lifted your knee and kissed up until his face was between your legs.

"Does this hurt?" His voice was low, muffled, but you could hear the smirk on it. 

A tongue ran over you sending hot shivers across your skin. The feeling of his goatee against your skin was different and _oh so good_. You could feel every satisfied noise he made as he built you up with gentle prods at your entrance or flicks against your clit, it didn't hurt, but it was certainly much more sensitive. He almost seemed to be enjoying it more than you were, the smile against you drifting between cocky and open mouthed lust. Even bruised and swollen, the feeling of his mouth against you so warm and wet was just gentle enough to tighten the coil in you until you were writhing against his face and gripping fingers into his growing curls. 

"Fuck, Gabe-" You gasped. "I could have just blown you-" 

"Mm-mmm." His face popped up, facial hair shining in the sunlight and cheeks pinked. "Not yet."

He returned between your legs, this time wrapping his arms at your thighs and holding you firmly against him. The way he kissed and tongued at you made you flutter your eyes and dig nails into his scalp. Without being able to move around, now that his arms held you, it was a struggle to hold on to the loose grip you had of reality at the moment. He was careful, tongue not pushing too hard, holding your weight with his arms instead of letting you press against him.

Lost in your taste, he didn't seem to mind your cursing and rutting when he would accidentally brush against bruises. When he'd get just a little to rough he'd pull back and kiss at the insides of your thighs, rubbing soft hair against your skin making you giggle and moan with need. His tongue ran slowly between swollen folds, over your clit pulsing with desire. You gave over entirely to him, relaxing your hips to give into his support, rolling your shoulders into the grass beneath the blanket, letting the sea wind carry away every moan and gasp that left you until you were shaking and hiding your face beneath your arm util you came against his mouth, surprising yourself when the moment finally hit you. In the height of your orgasm you looked down to him and found his smiling eyes staring right at your face, watching your every eye roll and every opened mouth pant with his name falling from your lips. His rough fingers dug into the skin of your hips as he stared, genuinely enjoying watching you come undone.   

When you were done your body went limp, falling back to the blanket as you caught your breath again. He helped you back to the blanket, lowering your hips from his face to the ground and rubbing little circles into twitching muscles. He sat back to watch you and you stared into the changing purple sky, your head felt light but you could register he was still pumping at his core watching you as legs twitched from aftershocks. With a half smile you motioned for him to move up to you. Hesitantly he appeared at your side and you rolled onto your stomach with a groan from an ache at your thighs until your face was in his lap, body laid out in front of him. His legs fell open for you as you took his cock in your hand and pumped him yourself again. 

With eyes lifted to meet his you ran your tongue from his base to his tip and his head fell back lost in lust. Even just moving your tongue up him you knew he'd be challenging _at best_ to take in your mouth, so you gripped at his base and pumped from the bottom with both hands, elbows digging into his thighs for support. His hand combed through your hair as you opened wide and bobbed down over him, careful with your jaw as you stretched it to take him. 

"You're doing so good." He said almost as a whisper. "Don't push yourself. Even this is more than I could have ever asked for." 

His praise made you smile around him and push just a little deeper, but he was too big. Hands continued to work him over and over again as you sucked at his tip, tongue roaming over the soft warm skin and taking in his taste. Your jaw was already hurting and you hadn't even taken him more than a third of the way in your mouth, instead you continued to lick along his length and watch his reaction above you. He didn't look like he was going last long, but he seemed to be holding on longer than you did with him between your legs. By the time your wrists were hurting and lips swelling, his stomach was pulsing with the need to release.

He reached down, gently tracing your chin and lifting your face to look at him. 

"Get on your back for me." 

Pink in the face, you shimmied down on the blanket and rolled over unintentionally arching your back from pain but he seemed to enjoy the sight. He quickly maneuvered around you placing knees on either side of your rib cage and his body hovering just above yours. You gave him a confused inquisitive look as he pushed your shirt up and over your head, hands wandering across your chest and tugging at sensitive nipples. He was acting playful almost, teasing you again before he made his next move and he smiled above you, a sweet smile that made your heart almost beat out of your chest, then brushing a gentle hand to your cheek. 

Then he pressed his cock to the middle of your chest, big hands pushing your breasts together around his cock and you tried to hide your face with your elbows hiding your burning blush, but he was fast to move your arms away so he could see you. He rocked against you again and again and although new and embarrassing at first you quickly realized just how good he was feeling as his low groans grew more and more unhinged. You let your mouth hang open, his tip grazing against your lips with every thrust. He looked to you with a knowing smile but you smirked back at him and held out your tongue, his response was an almost immediate hard pulse against your skin. As soon as you knew he was close you raked nails down his thighs, not hard enough to break skin, but enough to give him the last bit of stimulation he needed to push himself over the edge. 

He drew back and with final pumps from his hand he shot over your exposed chest and over your chin. 

"Fuck, I-" He panted out. "I could keep going all day." His admission was in the form of a nervous chuckle. 

"We'll work up to that." You joked, but the thought of locking yourself away in a room with him for an entire day was more than enough to send spikes of heat across your nerves. You propped yourself up on your elbows, ignoring the quickly drying fluid sticking on your skin. "Think there's any way we could climb down to the water?" He gave you a mischievous look which you responded to rolling your eyes and giving him a teasing glare. "Without you carrying me there?" 

He stood, holding out his hands in front of you which you grabbed hard and he pulled you to your feet. You were wobbly, aches still threatening to send you back to the ground. Instead of walking, he knelt in front of you offering his back to carry you despite your protests. You clung to him, holding a blanket wrapping up the plastic trays from the MREs and your clothes along with Gabe's shirt. He wandered along the cliff edge for a while, until the plane was out of sight and the cliff gave way to a slope leading down to a rocky beach. With all your things in a pile you both ran over bright sand and smoothed stones into crashing waves. 

There in the ocean water you washed away the stains on your skin and the last smells of the Overwatch uniform lingering in your hair. You played like kids in the waves fighting against the currents and floating weightlessly in water. You made him laugh by diving beneath the blue ocean and pinching at his sides pretending to be sea life, he held you against his body and kissed at the sides of your neck. You stayed in the water until fingertips were pruned and the last of the sunlight was sinking sending the sky into a brilliant orange sunset. Soaking wet and reeking of sea salt, you hopped up on his back again. Each naked and shivering in the wind, you wrapped your arms around him tight for warmth as he carried you back over the grassy hill and across a long cliff meadow until you were back at the plane. 

"As soon as you can stand on your own again, it's back to training." He told you as he wrapped you back in your own blanket on the cot. 

"No way!" 

“You don't get to skip out on training just because we slept together. It's still important we keep up on your practice so you can take me down if you ever need to, even more important now." 

You groaned and fell back into the cot, but pulled him with you until his body was leaned heavy onto yours. After another meal and more planning, you dragged him with you into the tiny bed, cuddling up against him on your sides and basking in his heat. That night was the first night you slept with Gabriel Reyes holding you the way he always wanted, no restrictions, no guilt, no worry of how you might react when you woke up. His hand fell wherever it pleased on your body, he would breathe in deep and smell your hair before lifting his head to kiss you again and again, still almost in disbelief that what was happening was real. 

* * *

 

Nights and days started meshing together, meals had whenever both of you were awake. After sleeping he would wake with his endless black eyes and you would be woken with a barrage of kisses along the invisible trail on your neck until his eyes returned to normal. He no longer turned to change, instead letting his eyes soak you in and enjoy the way you blushed or threw your dirty clothes at him jokingly calling him a pervert. It felt like a lifetime since you'd seen him this happy, and that made you happy. To save water in the plane you'd bathe together in the ocean, sometimes heading back to the plane to dry other times laying on a blanket in the warm sand and having the sun do it for you.  

Training felt entirely different. Instead of awkwardly trying to avoid holding each other, Gabe had no qualms with grabbing you by the waist. Instead of narrowly avoiding a blow, you let him take you to the ground and pin you there. Instead of disapproving scowls you were met with smothering kisses until you were giggling. When he was done kissing your lips he moved to your cheek, kissing until he pulled away and looked to you with sorrowful eyes, always apologizing for the way he was and you would always assure him nothing about him scared you anymore.

It got to a point where neither of you could quite remember how many days had gone by. You guessed a week, Gabe was convinced it was nine days, either way, you knew you were running out of food and needed to head back to some sort of civilization soon. You didn't want to leave, no matter how much you knew you needed to. Being alone with Gabe, away from prying eyes or judgmental commanders, you felt invincible together. Soon you knew you'd have to face reality again, one where you couldn't spend days soaking in the sun on private rocky beaches eating shitty MREs. You were comfortable here, comfortable with laying next to each other, comfortable with living half naked together and finally just seeing each other as people. 

But those days came to an end all to quickly. You sat in the copilot's seat, hand across the aisle in his as the plane sputtered back to life and lifted unceremoniously into the skies to head to Italy. He gave you a smile smile, which you returned, but neither of you wanted to leave the days on the sea cliff behind. Once in the skies he pulled you into his lap, hugging you close and kissing at your collarbones, muttering sweet things and about how happy he was to have you with him. Knowing the reality you were able to face was so much more terrifying than the decision to leave Overwatch behind. 

Plane hidden away, he moved through the shadows and brought you to a shady shop on the edge of the city to have a new mask made. You waited nervously next to him, eyes darting to windows with dark paint smeared across them from the inside, hands wringing in front of you until Gabe laced his fingers with yours and kissed as twitching knuckles.

“It’s a shame, what happened with Overwatch.” The mask maker said as he handed you a completely smooth chrome mirrored mask. You twisted it around in front of you, looking at your distorted reflection in the improved face covering no longer bearing the Talon breathing apparatus or the symbol on the back. 

“Sure?” You responded distracted, not quite sure how to respond- you didn’t think anyone would care about Blackwatch being disbanded. 

Gabe held a low conversation just out of your earshot. What you caught sounded threatening, argumentative almost, something about ensuring no one ever knew either of you were here. 

“We really should get going.” Gabe put a hand at the base of your back, guiding you away from the shop and out the door.

He helped you click on your mask, checking it by moving your chin this way and that before putting on his own. Outside you pulled up your hood, hiding beneath an oversized umbrella with Gabe as rain poured onto the cobble streets below. Masks hidden beneath incognito clothes he led you down poorly lit walkways and along docks abandoned for the evening before arriving on the outskirts of Talon’s headquarters. As you snaked your way through the streets you were making a mental checklist of all the ways to upgrade the mask when you have the time, there were electronic components on the inside for screens, but nothing had been setup yet and you'd need a day at least to work on programs for the things you wanted.

Talon HQ was foreboding in the dark rain. Windows all across the property were lit even so late in the evening, seemingly buzzing with activity. You entered through crew doors on the lower levels, Gabe slipping in with smoke before you to ensure there was nothing suspicious going on. He seemed extra protective of you when he let you in. Instead of using his smoke to move through the halls he was careful at your side, placing a hand against your lower back and guiding you up into the higher levels until you were in the lush dimly lit corridors. 

"Stay close." He whispered. "No one is acting afraid of me, something is wrong." 

To your surprise, everything and everyone seemed to be reeling with excitement. Agents were clearly drunk, obviously celebrating. Masks were off and everyone around you seemed to be in a haze of happiness. Something definitely didn’t feel right. You clung close to Gabe as you followed him until a group of agents called out.

"Reaper!" A laughing voice said before trying to portray seriousness and sobriety by standing up straight and speaking properly. "Reaper, sir. Tishler was hoping to speak to you before-" The agent started giggling, the others around him lifting drinks in drunken cheers and hitting each other playfully. The cackling agent stood from his buckled over position and held a finger up. "I'm s-so sorry, I'm good, Tishler is in his room and he wanted to talk to you as soon as you came back to base." 

With that the group sauntered drunkenly further down the hall and Gabe turned to you. Even though the Reaper mask you could feel his expression of worry and suspicion. As he whisked you towards Tishler's room, you carefully hid Genji's blades in your sleeves, preparing yourself for a confrontation. You each stood in front of heavy wood doors before you let out a deep breath and he knocked with hard knuckles against it. Tishler swung the door open at first with glaring annoyance, but it quickly changed to overjoyed glee. 

“Ah, Reaper there you are!” Tishler’s voice came booming towards you, a silk robed Arntz was clinging to his shirtless side. “We were beginning to think you wouldn’t show!”

Gabe placed himself between you and Tishler, you turned away even though he couldn’t see your face, but your heart still pounded with fear that he would recognize you.

" _What_ is going on here?” Gabe growled out beneath the mask.

“Well, we’re celebrating!” You looked over your shoulder at Tishler who grabbed at Arntz and slipped a hand into the open portion of her robe making her giggle against him. With a roll of your eyes you turned away again, god you felt like you were going to be sick just seeing her be so happy with that monster touching her. “Take the night off my boy, tomorrow we’ll meet to discuss getting Doomfist out of that damned facility.”

You watched two Talon agents stumbling down the hall together, laughing like hyenas and grabbing each other for balance.

“Oh! I almost forgot.” Tishler’s voice faded for a moment. “Officially, welcome to Talon. Doomfist _insisted_ on giving you a room here so you’re more readily available to him. Go on darling, give the man his gift.”

You listened to the sound of soft footsteps moving through the room then returning to Gabe, a lusty laugh and something be shifted. You could feel how uncomfortable Gabe got behind you, his body completely stilled as the light steps walked back where they came at Tishler's side. You turned, watching as Tishler pulled Arntz back into his room and slammed the door behind him with a gross smile at each of you. In Gabe’s hands was an expensive looking bottle of champagne, two electronic key cards bearing rooms ‘313A and 313B, and a small metal circle carved in Talon’s symbol. You looked to Gabe, and although neither of you could see each other’s faces, the stillness that lingered between each of you was unnerving. He grabbed your hand, holding it progressively tighter the closer he got to the rooms, gripping into it and almost crushing you when entering the plain quarters.

“Don’t take off your mask, sweep the room.”

You worked quickly, whipping out your hacking screen and scanning the room for everything you could think of. Radio frequencies, cameras, bugs, trackers, anything and everything that would give off any sort of electronic signature. Gabe nervously stood gripping into the edge of a large bed, leg shaking and mask facing the floor waiting for you.

Nothing.

It appeared Talon really did value privacy. You opened the door to 313B, a bedroom adjacent to Gabe’s clearly meant for security details or hiding away secret lovers. He waited for you to go over that one as well, body tight in a nervous stance and you could see the twitches in his muscles begging to rip his mask off. You double checked everything, hesitating before triple checking just to be sure, but you stood in the center of a room that looked more like a studio apartment and turned your solid reflective mask to him.

"It's clean." 

 

He quickly removed his mask, tossing it to the top of the bed and helping you unclasp yours from your head. As soon as it was off, even though you were sweaty and your hair was matted down, he held each of your cheeks in his palms and brought you to his face in a deep kiss. In that kiss you knew something was off. Both of you could feel it in the air, a lingering worry or a gut feeling that the worst had yet to come. His hand dropped to yours, lacing fingers together before he clicked on a screen in the wall and searched for world news, stopping at a story with somber faced anchors speaking in front of fiery images. 

Your whole body went numb. Not the good kind of numb you'd felt the last few days with Gabe after shaking highs with him between your legs, it was a numb that almost knocked your knees out from beneath you, a numb that sucked all the air from the room and left you in a static filled silence. Your nostrils and your throat filled with the smoke of a forest fire, pain from a long ago gun shot wound pounding at your skin. Was your heart still beating? It certainly didn't feel like it. 

Fate has a funny way of catching up with you.

You can make your choices. You can delay the inevitable for a while, but fate will always find a way to force you into facing what was _always_ bound to happen. Sometimes fate is running into an old friend in a dusty bookshop and falling in love unexpectedly, sometimes fate is your tire going flat before a long drive that would have ended in a fiery car accident, sometimes fate is being on a mission gone haywire that leads you into the arms of two commanders. But sometimes, fate sends you far into the sky turning your back on an organization you called home for years.

Fate doesn’t care for the choices you make. Fate still forces you into a breathless silence as you stand hand in hand, staring wide eyed at a news ticker counting the death toll from a massive explosion at Overwatch headquarters.    


	6. The Beginning Of The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now we're really in deep with Talon, it's time to visit an old friend.

Gabe was deathly quiet. His chest would rise and fall with long deep breaths pushing loud from his nose, eyes glued to the steadily rising number of dead. You had to mute the news anchors, hearing them describing first hand accounts and the chaos surrounding the scene was going to make you sick and you couldn't think of the faces of friends and acquaintances lost in rubble. Thousands dead or missing. Buildings you’d been in, pathways you’d run everyday, all of it destroyed and the worst part was you both knew exactly who ordered it.

You sank to the floor, body curling in on itself and limbs going numb as Gabe was stilled sitting on the edge of the bed with smoke slowly rising from his shoulders. Panging emptiness echoed through your body with every dry swallow of guilt that you weren't there to stop this, that you weren't there to help. In the days you’d spent so happy, living with no cares, you could have been here to prevent this to kill any of the Talon leaders before they had the chance to make the call. 

"They're going to pay for this." You were biting back the urge to rush down the hall and start taking down agents one by one. 

Gabe turned to look at you over his shoulder, endless black eyes fading back to regular whites as soon as he landed on your hate fueled expression. 

"We have to be smart about this." He breathed out, turning back to watch the death count. As he leaned forward with elbows on his knees he cracked knuckles and held tight to his own fingers before bouncing a leg in thought. "Retaliating immediately will only tip them off on our identities, and if we're going to take down this whole damn organization we have to do it step by step." 

"You're keeping an awful level head for someone who murdered their leaders without a second thought because he couldn't control himself."  

"It's not just me this time!" He shouted as he stood, regret from raising his voice immediately showing across his face when he saw you draw back from the volume. "Sorry. It's not- listen, it's not just about my goals and keeping myself alive anymore. I can't lose _you_ because one of us makes a stupid impulsive move. We need to change our plan slightly, but just because they've gone extreme doesn't mean we meet them at that same level. We have to play this in our favor."

"I'm pissed off, Gabe." You stood too, shaking even though all your limbs felt numb. 

"Do you think I'm not?" He grabbed you by the arms, face a horrible scowl as thicker smoke grew around him. "Do you think I don't want to find each one of the scumbags involved in this and put a bullet in their brains? Look around you. Understand where we are and what led us here, we don't have the luxury of being able to grieve. There's only one thing I need you to be right now, and that's a solider. Can you do that?" 

Your heart was beating in your throat, he looked _scared_.    

"Yes." Your mouth tasted like tears. Your hands fell to his hips, fingers gently holding onto him. "Yes, sir." 

“Good. Put your mask back on. There’s someone we need to speak with.” You could hear the anger in his voice, the grinding of back teeth together before he turned to clip his own mask back on. 

TV muted and displaying the destroyed remains of your former home left playing to an empty room as the door to the room slammed behind you. Smoke was trailing behind him as he stomped through halls making even the most jovial agents retreat into shamed silence to let him pass. You were walking through the tails of the smoke, it curled around your body and it felt protective against the drunken enemies. You followed with fists flexing, glaring at every person you shouldered by behind the reflective mask, hoping some sense of your anger could be felt by them. They all deserved to die for celebrating like this. They deserved it and you were going to see to it that they met the same fate your people had.

He was comfortable moving through their base, seemed to know exactly where he was heading before stopping abruptly at a heavy wood door on the fourth floor. Gabe's looming figure obscured your sight into the room but as the door opened from inside you heard a quiet gasp.

“Get in here.” Instantly you recognized Moira’s scolding voice. He slipped into her room with you quickly behind and her whole body seemed to tense the moment she realized there was someone else with him.

Her eyes were bloodshot, face flushed and clothes more unkempt than you had ever seen them. Still in her usual business wear, her shirt was completely unbuttoned revealing the middle of her chest down to her stomach, one side of the button up stuffed into fitted dress pants the other untucked and her sleeves rolled to her elbows. Her hair had fallen from its usual neat state to having messy strands hanging over her face, her eyes were dulled just a bit but she let out a breath that sounded like _‘oh’_ when they looked to you.

Gabe shut the door behind you and before you had the chance to remove your mask suddenly Moira was surrounding you in a hug. At first you froze, thinking it must have been an accident, that she must have tripped on her feet and fallen forward, but long nails roamed across the back of the mask and brought you close until you reached up to loosely hug her back. You were jerky in your movements, the last time seeing Moira was at the coffee shop on base when you told her you'd be admitting everything to Gabe. Thinking back now, she must have known long before you that you were falling apart with guilt. 

"I thought..." Her voice trailed off as she seemed to catch herself in a moment of weakness and she pulled away, ends of nails of a dark veined hand dragging along the jaw line of your mask so you were looking up to her. Her face snapped to Gabe, eyebrows twisting in anger. "Where have you been?" 

"Hiding." Gabe growled out. He motioned to her screen, also displaying the horrific news at a low volume. Your eyes followed to where she must have been sitting and watching, the same brand of expensive champagne that was given to Gabe by Tishler sat half empty on the table to the side of the couch with no cup in sight. Gabe huffed out. "How did this happen, Moira?" 

"I didn't know." She said under her breath, turning her head to look towards an open window with a cigarette still smoking in an ash tray. "Even though I've been able to get high in their ranks, Cornelius refuses to let me sit in during meetings with the other inner counsel members. From my understanding, Doomfist made the call only yesterday and things seem to be sour between him and Maximilian. I did not realize this was what they were planning-"  

"Were you smoking?" You interrupted knowing their conversation was more important, but something about seeing her cheeks pinked with alcohol and a room smelling of cigarette smoke seemed out of place. She froze to look at you as you pulled off your mask and Gabe made an annoyed grunt at your side. Moira shifted her hips and your eyes fell to her open shirt as she seemed to look to the ground in shame, her arm dropping to her side. 

"The last time I smoked was during final exams for my doctorate." 

"This is not what we need to be focusing on right now." 

"I thought you were both dead, Gabriel." Moira snapped at him and he drew back. "You went silent after that announcement about Blackwatch, then a few days ago we intercepted that memo about your new title-" 

"My new title?" 

"The Overwatch memo- your transfer to Combat Operations Commander? You should have come talk to me about this before accepting the position, you knew it was a danger to go back there." 

"Moira, we _didn't_ go back to Overwatch. When Gabe said we were hiding that is who we were hiding from." Your confused expression was met with her unsure one, her mismatched eyes shifted back to Gabe in confirmation.  

"We abandoned Overwatch. Why would they lie about me accepting the position?" He turned to face you with his Reaper mask as he brought hands to his face to slide it off. "Jack isn't stupid, he would have realized that we left. The directors must have stopped him from marking us as AWOL for some reason." 

"All they've ever cared about was their image, I have no doubts that they were probably pushing it off until they could come up with a better cover story." You crossed your arms in front of you, heart racing at the thought of Jack knowing you were gone but not being able to tell anyone. "We can't let anything like this happen again, we need more people than just Gabe on the inside. Moira what will it take to get you in those meetings with the inner counsel?" 

"Cornelius would need to be taken care of." Her voice was cold. "That girlfriend of his, too. If they are both out of the way it would be natural for me to take over his place seeing as I am, technically speaking, his second in command. There's a meeting tomorrow morning where all the counsel members will be present to discuss the next steps. If there's discourse during that meeting then there's a possibility all the other members could potentially vote to oust him-"

"No." You were shaking, speaking with an anger you were all too familiar with. "I don't want him voted out. _I want to kill him_." 

"We need to learn their plans first." Reaper mask in hand, Gabe turned to you with a look of bitter disapproval. "If you do not think you will be able to handle yourself in that meeting then I will leave you here with Moira."  

 Contrary to Gabe's anger, Moira was looking at you with a face fallen in morbid curiosity. She reached up again, brushing the hair from your face and tugging at the skin around your eyelids. Gabe seemed to quietly stare at your willingness to allow her to poke and prod at your face, at the way she touched you without even so much as a flinch. You almost pulled off your pullover as a habit, ready to present your arm for a blood sample or an experiment. The way she moved over your pulse was lazy and trailed down until her hand dropped and she started towards the window. 

"Careful, you're starting to sound like Gabriel." She looked you in the eyes and you could see the glazed over pain she was keeping to herself, for once her emotions readable. "Since you're both here I guess now would be a good a time as any to tell you I've finally found more information on Mrs. Lacroix." 

"Amélie?" You gasped out. "You found her?" That almost knocked the wind out of you. Moira turned her gaze to the icy waters outside before blowing a long drag of the cigarette through the window.

"Not quite, but I do know she is still alive. Cornelius admitted to using my unfinished reprogramming drug on her and turned her into..." She looked annoyed, or sad. "Well her field name is Widowmaker. She's being used as a sniper but I can't pinpoint her without a higher rank. With you here now there's a chance we could help her." 

"Could you reverse it? The reprogramming?" You dug your nails into your palms with a curled fist.

"It depends on how much he altered her mental and physical state. The man is an absolute psychopath, so I have little faith he used my drug without adjusting it in some way. It might be troubling to hear, but she may be in a worse state alive than she ever would have been dead." 

"We have to try." Your voice was wavering.  

"As much as it pains me to say this, Amélie can not be our priority right now. We'll head into that meeting tomorrow and dig up any information I can. Once we know the details we'll meet up and plan when the best time frame to get rid of him, as well as the other Talon leaders, will be." Gabe was using his commander's voice, grasping on to the feeling of still being in control. You shared a knowing glance with Moira who nodded, leaning against her window sill with another long exhale of smoke. 

"It's good to see you. Both of you." Cigarette between her fingers, the edges of her shirt were fluttering in the cold breeze coming through the dark open window. You could smell the sea, but it wasn't the same sea you had been jumping into with Gabe the last few days. This sea smelled of bitter salt and long dead ocean life. "Goodnight, my friends." 

Gabe grunted as he clipped his mask back over.

"Goodnight, Moira." You dropped your eyes away from her before pushing your own mask back over and turning back towards the door. 

* * *

While everyone was passed out, or close to being passed out from drunken celebrations, you and Gabe raided through the armory searching for anything and everything that didn’t have the Talon logo branded across it. New outfits, new _uniforms,_ to match your new life. 

What you ended up with were uniforms head to toe in black. With just the basics you could find the fundamentals of your outfits were the same- black combat pants for each of you with leg armor across the thighs, shirts also covered with built in protection mainly over the chest and stomach. He buckled on heavy metal boots with sections that glowed in the signature Talon red and heavily armored gloves that rose to his elbows, luckily the uniform shirts fell beneath the edge of the long metal gloves. You sheathed Genji’s blades into a thigh holster, tied up armored combat boots, and found augmented gloves to replace your hacking screen, gloves that covered from your fingertips to your shoulders in vein like red lighting showing you where the circuits where. Perfect covers, functional and giving you the ability to hide your scars. Over the uniform he clipped on his heavy belts and attached his guns and ammo at his hips. In a sea of black, between you both the only things the stuck out were his bone like mask and your sleek mirrored mask.  

Back in the room, you stood at his side, fists curled against your thighs. Across you stood a tall mirror, reflecting back the two glorified all black uniforms and masks that hid pissed off expressions. There was something unnerving but powerful about seeing the two of you like this. Together you looked scary, you looked dangerous, and that felt _good_. After a good look over you each removed the masks and placed them next to the bed. 

“I think I’ll make a jacket to go over this.” Gabe’s muffled voice said as he twisted his head this way and that to look over the put together pieces. "And add a couple of pieces to make it move functional." 

“They already call you Reaper, might as well have a cloak that matches it.” You mused, the comment making him chuckle. "If you're feeling up for it, I could use something with a hood." 

His arm curled at your waist bringing your side closer to his and his face turned, mask pressing to mask.

"I'd love to make you something." You could hear the smile on his voice, but felt his grip loosen to step back. Now in the privacy of a room to your own, he carefully removed the armored clothes and placed them waiting on a simple cushioned chair in the corner of the room. Down to simple boxers he pulled you towards the bed, sitting on the edge and looking over you with heavy lidded sad eyes. "I always knew you'd look good in black." 

You leaned forward, slipping fingers through his hair and pressing kisses on the top of his head. His hands slipped up the sides of your legs then under the edge of your shirt to help you out of your clothes. The way he touched you was making your skin jump and your breathing quicken, something about being touched like this made you both twisting with pleasure and horribly guilty. People died, people you knew and places you used to see every day were currently being cataloged and marked as evidence after an explosion ordered by an organization you were now actively a part of. 

"I'm not sure how I feel right now." You whispered once your shirt was pushed above your chest exposing you to him. "I know I'm angry and worried." 

"Me too." He stood, carefully bringing the shirt off you. "If something happened to Jack after we left like that, I... I don't know how I'll handle it. That's why we need to stay focused for now, if I get distracted thinking about what I could have done to prevent this, or what we could have done if we were on base- I can't think about it. I'll drive myself crazy." He kissed at your shoulder, hands roaming across your body and over old scars. "You have no idea how badly I want to lose control, how much I want to put bullets in every single person who's had any part in not just this explosion but those who also brought down Blackwatch. The only reason I haven't gone completely ballistic is because I have you. Please promise me that if anything happens tomorrow during that meeting, if talking about them doing this starts to be too much, signal me so we can get out of there. We can't lose our cool yet." 

"I'll be okay." You twisted locked of hair over the ends of your fingers. "I think right now I'm just... numb to the idea of facing any of them. But I'll be able to handle it. If I've learned anything, it's how to be a solider when it counts the most." 

He nuzzled his cheeks to yours, scratchy facial hair growing in as a beard around his already overgrown goatee brushing against you but you didn't care, you held onto him and breathed in a deep kiss as he pressed your chest to his. Something about the kiss put you on edge, a hint of something aching leaving your lips as you parted. Maybe it was the lingering feeling that any kiss could really be your last, or the overprotective claim on you after a doctor checked your pulse, or maybe it was the fear that one day you'd be looking into endless black eyes as hands wrapped at your throat. Regardless of the reason, you watched him carefully and chewed at the side of your lip as he helped you from your pants, pooling them at your feet on the floor. 

Down to underwear, he pulled you beneath black satin sheets and clicked off the lights leaving you in an unfamiliar quiet as the room settled. You laid side by side on a wide bed, bodies closer together than they needed to be with fingers lazily laced together under the blankets. You didn't like how dark it was in this room. Even with the curtains opened overlooking the sea outside, the ocean was dark, the sky was moonless and you couldn't see if smoke was rising into the air or not. Your heart hurt, it squeezed in your chest and drained heartache into your blood. 

"I miss movie nights." You choked out. Gabe's hand squeezed yours hard. "I miss laying on the couch with you, and Jesse getting drunk after two shots, and Genji teaching me curse words in Japanese. I miss our little family." 

"Maybe some day we can all find each other again." His voice was soft. "I doubt either of them will ever forgive me for being what I am, but I'd like to think that we could get there." 

"I miss Jack, too." Now you didn't mind the dark, it hid the tears falling at the sides of your face. 

"It's okay." He shifted, moving his body against yours, pushing at your hips gently until you were on your side and spooning you with a tight hold. "It's just us now. If you want to cry, you can." 

Your chest was jumping as you tried to control your breathing, his arms around you helped as a reminder that you weren't dealing with these emotions alone, you weren't going through this alone. Before your body gave into sleep you could have sworn he brushed his face against your hair, acting as a kiss, but you could feel the drops of tears also falling from his face. 

* * *

The darkened meeting room was set up just a little differently this time. Instead of open chairs, projected screens took places on the table showing members of Talon from all over the country. Faces you didn't recognize sat waiting for everyone to gather, their projections flickering every so often if someone bumped the table just a little too hard. At the far end Tishler sat with Arntz standing alert at his side, he had one hand lazily resting at the back of her hard light knee, thumb grazing up the lower part of her inner thigh. She was dressed in what you could only assume was her own version of a combat uniform, with the exception of rolled shorts to show off legs she was seemingly proud of. You stood behind Gabe, who donned in the Reaper mask tapped fingers impatiently on the table sitting as far from them as possible. Between were the projected faces of those you didn't recognize, and some you did- Akande Ogundimu, Doomfist who was still trapped in a cell somewhere. Maximilian, an omnic now in charge of everything Antonio once ran. Sanjay Korpal, the son of the man Gabe killed leading the technology company used by both Overwatch and Talon.  

After short greetings the angry spats started. Maximilian dug his robotic fingers against a table and even without the expressions of a human, you could feel the absolute rage radiating off him through the projected screen.

“We were not prepared to do this properly, Doomfist. It’s absolutely reckless, dangerous even, to have gone ahead and ordered this without discussing with _everyone_ first. Do you understand how much money we have lost out on now because you couldn’t think for even a minute about how this would affect us _business wise?_ _”_     

“Relax, Max. We’ve just done something no one else could ever do! We bought Overwatch down and you want to argue about logistics or money. Can't you see? We own the world now!"

"Own the world? You are a child. By continuing on without approval from us you've risked my agents in the field, you even killed some of undercover operatives in Overwatch. You're a goddamn idiot is what you are, and I'm ready to let you just rot in that prison cell-" A woman with an obscured face shouted towards her screen. 

"Did you even get your targets?" Another voice asked. 

"If we had someone that could actually hack into their systems and not just an idiot who phishes people's emails then we could look into their official deceased list, unfortunately _Tishler_ failed completely to recruit our target." Doomfist was wrapping something around his knuckles, looking to ready for a fight. Your heartbeat jumped across your body, the fear of them finding out you were right there suddenly sucking the air from your mask. 

"Lightning can do it." Gabe grumbled out behind his mask, a gloved hand patting your arm. "Best hacker out there." 

"Can you do it now?" Tishler leaned forward against the table, a disgusting smile across his face. "I would love to find out if Doomfist jumping the gun was worth it." 

You nodded, the reflective mask sending streaks of light across the room as you moved to sit in the chair next to Gabe. The new augmented gloves were awkward to use compared to your screen, but maybe you were just old fashioned. It felt outright silly to be typing things in the air, even more so realizing only you could see what you were doing on the inside of your mask. As you worked on hacking into back end systems the counsel leaders around you continued to argue between themselves. 

In their bickering you could hear much of the blame seemed to fall on Korpal okaying the explosion with only Doomfist's order. They fought about who was really to blame, fought about the mess it was causing for ground agents now scrambling to work around the disruptions to their lives. You were never more thankful to have your face covered, you bit your lip knowing full well a fight would likely break out once Gabe's name didn't appear on the deceased list, but you had to know, you had to see for yourself if Jack was on it. 

Gabe stayed quiet, he faced forward but you could see the way he kept curling his fist against his leg almost as if he wanted to reach out for your hand. Your stomach jumped when you finally reached the unofficial lists, agents and civilians on base who were being tagged in morgues across the country. The room suddenly felt freezing, like ice poured straight into your veins. 

Stay calm.

Don't react. 

With no fanfare you dragged the document from your own system into the projections in the room. Conversation died instantly as the leaders read the first few names on the list ordered by rank in Overwatch. 

"Well, I'll be dammed." An unrecognized voice sighed out. "Jack Morrison and Gabriel Reyes? You actually got them you crazy bastard. Look at how many other commanders and lieutenants there are too." The voice seemed amazed, but you looked to Arntz who paled as she read further down the list. Her eyes searched the air for a moment before tapping Tishler on the shoulder and pointing. 

She was pointing at your name.

Somehow your name and Gabe's name were listed with the dead. Tishler snarled in anger, Arntz seemed shocked almost. 

"What did I tell you?" Doomfist laughed out. "I'm always right. Now, let us focus on how we're going to get me out of this shit hole, yes?"  

You stopped listening after that, instead staying perfectly still in your seat, hands in your lap, eyes zeroed in at a pattern in the stone table. You couldn't breathe. You didn't want to think about Jack dying thinking you hated him, you didn't want the people you left behind to think you were the type of person who would leave missions behind for no reason. You'd never be able to explain to them, never be able to show them the blood of the Talon leaders and that everything you'd done was worth it. 

Completely focused on staring at this imperfection in the table, you felt a heavy hand land against you, Gabe silently standing behind you and his Reaper mask bearing into your soul. The projected screens were off, other leaders gone but Tishler and Arntz lingered behind. They seemed to be having a low angry conversation and Arntz was angrily pushing him away from her as he tried to put a hand at her waist. Tishler's face snapped to you as soon as you stood and he immediately had that disgusting smile before calling out. 

"Where do you think you two are off to in such a hurry?" He lumbered towards you, Arntz trying to pull at his muscled arms to stop him but nothing would until he was standing between you and the door. You both stayed silent, Gabe crossed his arms tightly over his chest and you could almost feel the absolute anger he was controlling within himself. “Oh, don’t be a spoilsport Reaper! Where do you have to be that is so important right now?”

“Business.” Gabe growled out.

“Business, or _pleasure_? You two seem to be awfully close for just being partners.” He turned to Arntz, dropping his voice low with a smile. “What do you think pet, do they keep the masks on or take them off while they’re ravishing each other?” Tishler seemed to purr out with a sick grin. She didn't seem to be in the mood for his sick flirts, instead she grunted out and curled her lip at him. You both stared at them through your masks, you were sure with the same expression of disgust and hatred before Gabe turned a hard shoulder to the man.

“I’d suggest keeping comments like that to yourself.” Gabe growled out, his gloved hand opening the door.

“Don’t act like that, I’m just teasing." Tishler slammed the door shut, staring down into the eyes of Gabe's mask. “Say, Reaper-” Tishler dropped his voice low when he spoke to Gabe, clearly making a show of it pretending neither you or Arntz could hear him. “What would it take to swap out my darling Kiri for your little sidekick for one night?”  

You were absolutely blinded with rage by the comment, turning on your heel with Genji's blades ready in your fist Gabe caught your arm in the air punching towards Tishler without even looking. His big hand gripping around your forearm you were left frozen, chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. Arntz stumbled back, almost looking as if she was going to cry. 

“Say something like that again, see what happens.” Gabe, no _Reaper_ , threatened.

“Relax. We're all friends here aren't we?” Tishler smiled and threw his hands in the air, stepping back but something in his expression twisted your stomach. He roughly hooked an arm around Arntz at her waist and she glared at you under low brows. Tishler leaned your way before exiting with Arntz at his side. "Welcome to the team, be ready for your first official Talon mission by the end of the week. I think we're going to work well together." 

He slammed the door behind him and you were left even more pissed off and upset than you were before, shaking at Gabe's side until he gently placed the forehead of his mask to the top of yours.  

"I can't wait to watch you kill him." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one is a little shorter than normal! Gearing up for the big stuff! (ﾉ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧


	7. Timor Mortis Conturbat Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You win a battle, but not the war.

"Then it's decided, Doomfist first. Throwing a coup is almost never successful the first time, we'll need to have a backup plan." Gabe had his arms cross tight over his chest, brows down in annoyance. Alone with him and Moira you felt free to discuss your battle plans, but things quickly turned sour when Gabe refused to let you march down to Tishler's office to kill him then and there. 

Be patient, he told you.

Don't act in anger, he used his commander voice.

Trust the plan, you parroted back to him. 

It will all work out, Moira whispered with a nail lifting your chin. 

"You'll need to weed out his supporters. It appears many seem to think of him as the head of Talon." Moira was eyeing you, silently saying it would likely come down to you to figure out who was still loyal to the man behind bars. You still felt numb from the explosion, still somewhat disconnected or like it wasn't real, and that made the daunting task just the tiny bit easier. You were sure she was reading you like a book, your emotions threatening to come unhinged, but there were no other people in this world that you trusted more than Gabe and Moira to see this through. "With Doomfist out of the way, you and Gabriel can take control of the field agents. Then we can move onto the next leaders."  

"It's not going to be easy to grab power from the inner circle once Doomfist is out. We'll need to do something to keep them compliant. Something to prove that we're serious if they don't consider us a threat." You were already mentally ticking off the ways you could do this. 

"What do you suggest?" Gabe rested his body against the wall, a little glimmer in his eye hoping you were going to suggest something that he's _desperately_  been fighting back an urge to see you do again. He knew exactly what you were thinking. 

You stopped a full blown smile and he covered his own mouth with eyes locking into yours. It was unspoken, the idea shared between two like minded people who were bloodthirsty for revenge. It would be a slaughter of Doomfist's agents and you wanted Gabe to touch you the same way you had after you killed those Talon agents trying to track down Tishler, you wanted him to look at you the same way he had with empty black eyes, but this time you wanted him to have the guts to kiss you as you rode a mental high of taking lives.  

"Would either of you care to actually share what you're thinking?" Moira's annoyed voice cut through your grins. 

"We're going to control them with fear." Gabe's smile finally came out full force. In the blink of an eye his were solid black, Moira stepped backwards at the sudden change but you'd never wanted to jump on him more. "We're going to show them _we're_ in charge of who lives or dies." 

* * *

Plans in place, it was time to integrate yourself with Talon forces. Masked as Reaper, Gabe walked you down through the training halls, overlooking agents who shifted on their feet at the sight of him. Even with his face covered you could see how much he was enjoying being in power again, you were sure he missed the thrill of commanding, especially now that Talon was his only option. 

It took a few days to settle, but those days seemed simple to the plans you were setting the stage for. It was a few painful days of carefully laying out every detail of the plan, of watching and noting the higher agents responses to questions of loyalty. During the nights you crawl into the bed with Gabe, he'd hug you close and you swore sometimes you could hear him mumbling about Overwatch in his sleep. 

He was still having the night terrors. Smoke still rose high into the air late at night but it was becoming easier to see, normalizing night after night and sometimes you would curl fingers in the air just to see it around you. Something about knowing what he dreamed of, knowing the horrific urges deep inside him, it didn't scare you all that much now. Instead you'd run hands through his hair and touch growing facial hair until his body settled against the bed and you'd fall asleep soundly next to him.   

Scars and hands covered with augmented black gloves, you checked a list of messages, now that you were part of the organization it was a strange empty feeling, all too reminiscent of working in Overwatch but you swallowed your pain and scrolled to one from Tishler saying he needed to meet with you later that day. 

"Do you want me to go with you?" Gabe asked in a hushed voice as his body surrounded you when you tried to leave. 

"It's going to be suspicious if we go everywhere together. I don't enjoy the thought of being alone with him, but I'll be okay." 

"Just remember, don't speak unless absolutely necessary." 

"I know." 

Off you went, reflective mask bouncing light to the walls down further and further until you reached a large man standing at the entrance to a closed off hall. He had a lab coat on over his usual fitted dress shirt, shoes shined in competition with your mask. Something about Tishler looked just a little off, the scar along the side of his head was just a little fuzzy with thick hair growing in. He hadn't shaved, dark orange facial hair speckling across his rounded jaw. Usually pointed dark eyes were dulled with exhaustion and he didn't bother with a usual creepy smile as he motioned for you to follow him down the halls towards the medical wing of the massive Talon base. 

"Glad to see you're the kind of person who knows how to follow orders." He groaned out as he walked. "I am not the kind of person who will ask twice." 

Your steps were careful as you followed him, fingers hovering over a gun holstered to the side of your leg. With each step further and further in you were met with your stomach sinking further and further to the floor. You didn't want to be here. You didn't want to partake in any of this, but it wasn't like you had much of a choice now. Here, you were faced with the reality of exactly what Tishler and Moira were doing: human experiments. 

Just the sounds were making your stomach weak. Groans of pain, aching agony came from behind thin glass doors where you could see people. Some were dressed in Talon uniforms, strapped to metal beds with dark purple liquid pumping into their blood through long tubes and veins dark like honeycombs vivid across their skin. Others were dressed as if they'd been taken from the street, their faces in a hazed out confusion with wide fear in their eyes. He walked you down a long hall, too many rooms with too many people being tortured and tested all the way to a laboratory at the end. 

"Doctor O'Deorain is in charge of the lab while I'm away. While she is my second in command here, do not forget who is actually in charge." He turned to glare at you over his shoulder before continuing down the hall, ignoring the screams of nameless people calling in anger towards him as he passed. "She and I have very differing views about how test subjects should be handled. Such a shame really, I chose her specifically because I know she does not have qualms about testing on humans, but she seems to have a gentler approach. Currently she's focusing on improving the super soldier enhancement program abandoned by the U.S. government, we've made some significant advancements. Perhaps one day you'd be willing to take off that little mask of yours and test it out, what to you say?" 

He was smirking now, obviously mocking you and trying to goad you into declining him, but you kept your mouth shut. 

"It really is no fun if I'm just talking to myself." He huffed and led you to a table in the back of the lab with documents spread across it. "Talon has been in need of hacker for quite some time. You will be heading out with me on a mission later this week to take back some items that were unfortunately stolen from my lab back in Scotland. You will need to get through three security gates and possibly a few basic omnic forces. With such a brilliant one like yourself on our team, I imagine this should be no problem for you."

Stolen was a loose term. These were police documents, warrants, and court orders to search and seize any property belonging to Tishler in Scotland. You nodded to yourself, so _that's_ why he's been spending so much time in Venice. He was expecting you to help him break into a holding facility for open cases and pull from evidence lockers. You leafed through the papers, one by one, scanning over them with your gloves so you could keep track of exactly what he was expecting you to get. 

Three red leather bound journals of hand written observations and graphs. 

Six vials of an unknown liquid, in the margins of the page Tishler wrote in little block letters that it was samples of the original U.S. super soldier serum.

Official documents, Tishler's passport and identification for multiple countries. 

A box of jewelry. He noted he didn't care for most of it, but he required you to retrieve were two tungsten men's rings, a matching set of pure diamond ear rings with a long chained necklace and a woman's ring.   

Some of things he'd crossed out were various supplies of medical equipment, wads of cash and other expensive things that he could replace in a heart beat. 

"It also seems my darling Kiri is playing a cute little game of hide and seek. She's like this sometimes, _feisty_ you see, but she knows she can't stay away for long." He pushed up the sleeves of his lab coat to his elbows, across the inside of his forearm against pale skin and around dark orange hair was a long faded tattoo. _Timor mortis conturbat me_ , it read in a simple print from his wrist to his inner elbow. "I believe she's likely holed herself away in my home, and you're going to help me bring her back." 

You turned to study him. It hit you like a speeding bullet. _He looked like a mess because Arntz was gone._ Something about a man like him being broken up about a woman like her running away made your stomach do flips. Those two together were sick, a terrible equation for disaster. 

He must have taken note of how long you were looking at him, at the feeling of your eyes taking in every tired feature of his face.

"I can give you something to stare at, if you like." There it was. The creepy smile, he leaned back against a counter with his hands resting at his belt, broad shoulders lifted in the air as he settled to a smirk.  

You shouldered past him, done with getting the documents you needed and too annoyed to deal with his snarky comments. He reached for your arm which you shook off with a hard elbow to his side hoping to remind him that you could hurt him if you wanted to. 

_"Fuck you."_

In the heat of the moment you forgot one of the few rules Gabe gave you when working with Talon: Don’t speak.

You stopped dead in your tracks to snap your head back and gauge his reaction. He still had that gross smirk but his eyes were burning with something darker now. Your heart beat loud in your ear drums, if he _did_ recognize your voice he had a damn good poker face- expression unchanged from moments before he raised a brow to question why you turned back to look at him.

"Well, you seemed like you were in a rush. Don't let me stop you." He adjusted the rolled up sleeves of the lab coat and lowered lids into a blood chilling stare. "Run along."   

You walked at first, a speed in your step that could be understood as angry, but as soon as he was out of sight you were sprinting. SEP blood pumping through your veins, you were shoving horrified agents out of your way all the way until you reached the high levels of the building, until you were bursting into room 313A, terrified and alone. Gabe was still gone.

You bit your lip, maybe he didn't recognize you, maybe he really thought you were dead and you could play this off. 

For now, you sat heavy on the edge of the bed, wiping off cold sweat from your forehead and vowing only to say something to Gabe if Tishler acted suspicious.  

* * *

He didn't seem to act any differently to your relief, so you were still sticking to the plan. The morning before leaving for Scotland with Tishler and his squad of agents for protection, there was a council meeting. One Reaper called, which drew all the attention of the leaders. He went to the meeting room in the basement without you, sat at the long stone table with projected screens of leaders who couldn't make it in person. It was time to overthrow one of the leaders.  

It happened simultaneously.

Reaper stood in a dimly lit conference room, arms resting heavy on a dark stone table and growled out that Doomfist would no longer be considered a council leader. The other leaders sat back in their chairs, watching the reactions of everyone else before grumbling their support to overthrow him. You expected some of them to argue against kicking him out, expected Korpal or Tishler to offer reasonable explanations why Doomfist was still viable to them, but they kept their mouths shut as Doomfist burst into an angry rant on the screen projected him from his cell.

You wondered if they feared in because of what he'd done to the other Talon leaders, a slaughter when he found out his own blood was pumping through your veins. There was one thing you knew for sure however, it appeared making the life altering call of destroying Overwatch didn't exactly make him popular with the other leaders, especially not Max, who had already betrayed him once before and seemed positively smug about Reaper attempting to take. You could swear if the omnic could, he would be smirking. 

"You can't do this! I am still in control! The army is mine and they will _only_ listen to me. I will order them to kill every single one of you if I have to!" Doomfist screamed at the council.   

Your cue. Floors below you stood in waiting, ready to go at the opportune moment.

You opened your own screen, revealing to the Talon leaders two rows of high ranking lieutenant agents bound tightly to simple metal chairs, lieutenants who pledged their loyalty to Doomfist and that you'd gagged and covered their mouths. Even more selective, you targeted the ones who were involved in organizing the attack on the Blackwatch base so many years ago. This was both an example and revenge. 

You could see Doomfist's reaction, his expression fell, the sinking in his stomach obvious as he watched you move behind one in the center of the screen. You readied a handgun, pointing it at the back of a crying agents head, waiting on Gabe's signal. 

"Anyone who follows your orders will be considered a traitor to Talon." Gabe's voice was low, frightening low, and even through the screen you could see smoke rising from his shoulders. He was _loved_ seeing you like this. "And let this also be an example to anyone else in this room should they choose to fight against me." 

There was a calm over you, the same calm you felt murdering Talon agents before. You'd never held a gun so steady, never felt so focused on your breath before you squeezed the trigger. 

You smiled behind your mask, his loyal executioner. 

You waited for his nod, heart slowing to a calm as you pulled the trigger against the back of the first agent's head. Those gagged and next in line gasped through the cloth in their mouths with muffled cries in horror, many unable to look away from the now dead agent slumping forward in his seat. With no hesitation it was a neat ordeal of pointing the gun to another, firing one shot, moving on to the next, and listening to the whimpering of the rest until all of them sat dead for their loyalty. Your eyes turned back to the screen, masked behind the reflective covering and you saw the color drained from some of the leaders faces, many unable to look at the gruesome sight. They'd watched you take the life of a dozen Talon agents, no masks over their faces, no bags to hide their terrified expressions. They only saw the death you brought. 

Max sat straight in his chair with folded hands over the table, Tishler leaned forward with a sick smile and eyes glued to the scene. 

"We've given you a glimmer of kindness, Doomfist." Gabe started, his mask turning back to the screen with Doomfist watching in anger. "We only killed your highest ranks. Mark my words, if you retaliate in any way the rest of your supporters will be slaughtered." 

Doomfist stood, chest rising and falling with long heavy breaths. His fingers were curling at his side, anger controlled but about to blow over the top. With an awful grunt ripping from his throat he hit his camera hard and knocked it out of commission sending his signal offline.

All eyes turned to Gabe, turned to  _Reaper_ , who stood looming over the meeting table and he tapped the ends of gloved fingers against stone. He was almost done with a cloak, talking about adding claws to the uniform and you couldn't wait to see it put together.  

"Tishler, send your team to clean up those bodies before you head out for your mission today. I expect Lightning to be well taken care of while she's under your lead." This wasn't just a commander's voice, this was something so _much more_ and you liked it.

No, you  _loved_  it.

"If anyone has any concerns about Akande's departure from Talon come talk to me personally, I would love to  _convince_  you this was the correct decision." You could hear the smile on his voice. 

"I can cut him off from Talon funds within the next two days." Max mused as he leaned forward towards Reaper. You listened in surprise as you walked through each of the agents and checked if any of them had miraculously survived point blank shots to the head, the bottoms of your boots sticking with blood to cold cement floors. Oh Max, always quick to turn things in his favor, he could see the tides shifting from Doomfist and jumped ship at the first wave. 

"We'll order the undercover agents out of Helix." Another leader over a blue monitor said. "Without our agents there is no guarantee of protection while he's in prison."

"Excellent." Gabe growled out. 

The first phase of the plan went off without a hitch. It seemed surprisingly easy to throw a coup against Doomfist, but with tensions high after the Overwatch explosion opinions were easy to turn. If you had to guess, they were already looking for an out and this was the perfect opportunity.    

The first step of many now locked in place, it was time to head out in a caravan to Tishler's home to help the organization you only wanted to destroy. You hurried out of a room where the air hung heavy with blood, trailing dark red footprints behind you as you turned your back on the ruthless killing of agents who never saw you coming when you asked where their loyalty laid. It was a long walk to a small flight bay in the back of the base that hung over the edge of the water. 

A huddle of agents were together and whispering with hurried voices as you approached, only to be met with deafening silence when they realized you joined them. They already knew what you'd done, word spreads fast. Even behind masks you could feel it. You could feel a blanket of fear and that made your skin buzz with power. 

At that exact moment you realized you wanted nothing more than to hunt Gabe down and pin him to the floor. It was a sick mix of adrenaline and agency that was driving you to think that maybe Overwatch had only been holding you back this whole time. Their rules, their contracts, strict morals that kept you from feeling _like this_ , from getting the job done. You were standing taller, shoulders dropped back and although no one else could see it, you felt _good_ and you wanted nothing more than to feel this way with Gabriel between your legs. 

Tishler joined you after making his way from the meeting room, brushing his hand picked team into the drop ship but stopping you just before you stepped onto the plane. 

"That was quite the show." His voice sounded like he was talking through gravel directly behind you. Even though you couldn't see it, you could feel his smile. "What other plans have you and Reaper been making behind closed doors, hmm?" 

You didn't move. Didn't react. Kept your breathing steady and your mind sharp. You weren't going to let him shake you. Tishler didn't deserve your fear. Instead after a silent moment you jerked your body away from his and stepped into the drop ship, joining agents who faced their bodies away from you on the wall for take off. 

As you sat still on the flight to Scotland message after message came through to your helmet, displayed on an internal screen visible to only you. 

 _Reaper [12:21:01]_ You looked incredible

 _Reaper [12:21:47]_ Stay smart out there with Tishler 

 _Reaper [12:22:28]_ When you get back I won't be able to keep my hands off you

 _Reaper [12:23:02]_ Just thinking about you doing that is driving me crazy 

 _Reaper [12:23:55]_ You've given me everything I could have ever wanted and then more

 _Reaper [12:24:23]_ I wish you were here right now 

Your skin was burning up, he had no idea how much you wished you were there with him too, but you had a guess his messy string of messages meant his mind was a little preoccupied at the moment.  

 _You [12:25:34]_ i'm going to call you. keep going. i want to hear.

With that you dialed out, biting your lip and turning the volume down low so only you could hear him in the earpiece of your helmet, the roaring sound an engine hiding his unmasked voice from the agent napping next to you. 

"I don't think you really want to hear this." He sighed into the phone and it lit every nerve in you on fire. You could hear it in his voice, could hear the lust he was trying to hide. You wished you could be there with him, bouncing in his lap taking in inch after thick inch. You tried to focus on your breathing, tried not to look at Tishler sitting on the other side of the drop ship with dark eyes pointed to you. "Fuck. How do you do this to me? No one has ever made me feel like this." 

 _You [12:28:51]_  tell me what you want to do to me 

You messaged him while he was between breaths and heard the hitch as it came through to him. There was a deep groan, a shift of clothing and skin. Your cheeks were burning, never more thankful to have a mask you were sure your face was obvious with lust you tried to hide the obvious signs of lust as you sat strapped in to your seat. 

"Oh, if you were here-" He stifled a moan and you could just feel that his hand was working at his center. "I don't even think I'd be able to tease you. I'd have you pressed up against the door as soon as you came in. I wouldn't want to wait, I'd want you right there the moment I saw you. I want to fuck you so hard you can't see straight or until you pass out again." He laughed, but it ended in a lengthy breath. "I-I don't think you understand how much I've thought of you like this. Having you all myself now, having you moan my name, I'd keep you against the bed for rest of our time here at Talon if I could." 

 _You [12:33:12]_  you sound so good like this 

"Hah, I hope you're ready for me when you come back. I want to get you to a point where I won't hurt you if we go a few rounds. I want to hear you begging me to let you finish. Want your nails leaving marks down my back. Fuck, I want to choke you. _Really_ choke you. Want you gasping for air, gasping my name-" 

Shit. You let out a little moan, a little shutter and tried to catch the way your body shook in on itself, not being able to slip a hand between your legs was killing you. Tishler raised a brow at you, the agent at your side shifted away. 

"Sounds like you liked that?"

You could hear him. It was a soft thudding noise on the other end of the call, a familiar sound that made you squirm in your seat. Knowing he was touching himself to you listening, knowing he was thinking of you, it sent your pleasure over its limit. 

"You can do whatever you want to me, you know. I'll take anything you're willing to give. Fuck- Fuck, I'm so close." He sounded so needy, and that was _exactly_ how you liked him. 

Now you were really warm. 

 _You [12:37:58]_  let me hear you 

"Fuck~!" He sighed and you could hear the steadily increased beats.

Moments passed, your name spilling from his lips as he released and you were blushing so hard the inside of your mask was fogging up. This made you feel powerful too, in a completely different way. Maybe this is what people meant when they said someone was drunk on power, because it made your head swim and only want you more. You were in control of Commander Gabriel Reyes, he was hanging on your words, on the sounds your breaths, he'd wanted this for so fucking long that he'd give anything to have you and that almost pushed you over the edge on the spot. 

"Fuck." He groaned. "I need you back here as soon as possible. Don't spend too long on that mission. When you're back here I expect your full attention." 

 _You [12:57:12]_  yes, sir 

"Talk to me like that and you won't be able to walk like that for a week." He laughed but you knew he meant it. "Good luck out there. Moira and I are keeping an eye out if you send any distress signals. Come back safe." 

 _You [13:08:02]_  see you soon commander 

Ending that call almost ended you. The feeling between your legs was unlike any ache you'd ever experienced, but you'd have to set aside the pain of not getting off with Gabe in order to focus. You steadied your breath, looked away from Tisher's prying eyes and opened your mission report. Get his 'stolen' goods, find Arntz, get back on the ship- all within the day. You wanted to fight back, wanted to argue that he was asking the impossible, but you bit your tongue and ignored the feeling dropping from your chest that he was setting you up for failure.

The plane ride without Gabe's voice whispering dirty things into your ear was long and uncomfortable. No one spoke. There was no jovial sharing of agents lives like there was back in Overwatch, it was all business all the time. The ship itself landed behind wet grasslands of his estate, and from there you were dispatched with three ground agents for protection as you approached the evidence facility. 

It was only when you were faced with the hacking screen hovering over an omnic's information that you hesitated. 

 _"Now_ , Lightning." Tishler demanded into your ear piece and your hands shook as you opened the screen with your augmented gloves. 

It was a simple omnic, not one meant to have human features, not one with unlimited learning abilities, or the knowledge to put up a fight, it was built and coded simply to monitor security and report anything unusual. Something about it still felt wrong, rooting around in its code felt almost like what you imagined reprogramming a human brain must be like- something Tishler was all too familiar with. It probably had memories, a life outside of serving the evidence lockers. What scared you even more than recoding the simple omnic was how easy it was to switch their main function. You were sure somewhere this would set off a silent alarm, some sort of alert that the building's security was compromised but you rolled your lips between your teeth wondering how far you could take this, mind wrapped with curiosity at the possibilities, but with unsure fingers you typed out lines and lines of code to force the omnic away from its core functions.    

You wanted to feel bad. You knew you should feel terrible for what was essentially changing someone's entire moral compass, but something about it just felt _natural_.     

It acted exactly as you coded it to. Turning its back and a blind eye to you entering a normally secure facility. You shook your head, it was almost laughable how easy it was to get through security systems when they weren't protected with international sanctions-  clearly this small facility was never worried about being hacked by someone like Talon. You rifled through their cabinets, drawers and rows of evidence for active cases that they'd left in the hands of easily hackable security. Tishler would speak over your comms every now and then, chiming in with unhelpful comments but you never spoke back.

It was so easy to hack into an omnic.

Hacking into an omnic was something you never would have done with Overwatch, Jack would have been so disappointed in you. 

Jack.

Jack Morrison was dead. Jack Morrison made his choices. You didn't have to make him proud anymore. 

"Hurry it up, Lightning." Tishler's voice boomed over the mic at you. 

"We'll leave without you if you don't get what I need." He was so demanding. 

"Reaper must really have it bad for you if he's willing to have a mute freak like you as his second in command." You couldn't wait to kill him. 

You held your breath almost the entire time you were sneaking through the building, ignoring Tishler's shitty comments in your ear piece. You didn't want to, but you got everything he asked for. Hand written notes, serums, jewelry, identification, you tucked them all away in a pouch at your back and saved them to bring back to a man who you hated, a man who you were silently screaming that you were now working for.

Things got tense, police cars converging on the building as you were exiting and for a few brief moments you almost thought you might have been caught sneaking his evidence away. You hated it, but against every internal instinct you returned to Tishler exactly what he asked for and he couldn't have been more elated. 

To your dismay, things didn't go quite so well at his estate. 

After you'd given him everything from his evidence lockers you searched his home with his hand picked team at your side. His house was massive, an old stone building that might as well have been an estate from a Jane Austin novel. Long grass fields and murky ponds surrounded the home keeping it isolated. Every corner, every cabinet, every dark hiding space was looked over for any trace of Artntz and to your horror, there was none. You swallowed your pride, wondering if she had in fact followed through with her threat to follow Doomfist, but a sinking feeling in your stomach told you she wouldn't actually be able to stay from Tishler for long. Together they were this terrifying power couple that shook you to your very core, and you could just feel how powerful Arntz felt when she was with him. You returned empty handed and with no news to Tishler about Arntz's whereabouts and that made him angry- so angry you had to distance yourself from the team because you were afraid he might just drive a scalpel into you out of rebellion. 

You were a day away from returning home when you found out Reaper had been sent on a mission to the middle east, something about dealing with halfhearted supporters- you assumed by dealing with, Talon meant murdering innocents until full faith was put in the organization. You held your breath almost the entire ride back to base, ashamed of the work you'd done but sickly happy of knowing what you _could_ do.     

There was nothing stopping you from taking it further than this. You could be just like Moira, you could control people if you really wanted to. 

The thought of reprogramming was halted as you arrived back on base, Tishler tailing you off the drop ship and up to the higher floors. At first you thought he was just heading back to his own room, but he was on your heels and he wasn't letting up. Your whole body ached from days worth of hacking and sneaking, legs shaking with every step, knees threatening to buckle under the pressure but you had to keep walking, you had to maintain just enough strength to make it back to your room then you could slam that heavy door in Tishler’s face.

Gabe wouldn’t be back yet, but when he was back all you wanted to do was curl against him and fall asleep.

Tishler’s steps were heavy behind you. He was too close and you assumed it was just to intimidate you. You could hear his breathing at your back, could feel his presence close behind you, forcing an escort back to your room you'd never asked for. You stayed silent still, too afraid to speak, too afraid for him to hear you and draw the connection, but still he kept up after you and part of you thought you might be in for the fight of your life as you neared closer and closer to your room. 

"No need to be in such a rush, pet. Reaper wanted to ensure I got you back to base safely, I'm just seeing to it that I keep that promise."

His voice had something horrible behind it, a smile or a smirk that told you there was so much more, but you tried to push past the stomach clenching feeling. 

Everything in your body told you not to open the door to your room. You stopped at 313B, the side room attached to Reaper's where most agents assumed you were stayed, where Tisher thought you were living. Your mouth was dry. Your palms sticking to black gloves. You couldn't explain the horrible gut feeling that something wasn't right. Then you opened your door, freezing in absolute fear at a sight that almost sent you falling to your knees.

A larger than life hand landed on the side of your arm as you stared in at the room, Tishler’s grinning voice behind you creeping close to your ear.

“Did you _really_ think I wouldn’t recognize you?”   

Roses. Deep red rose bouquets, petals, single stems. Your room was covered in them the same way the scene of a grizzly murder would spray blood across the furniture and floor. You couldn’t feel your heart beating or the sensation of your skin, you couldn’t breathe or move. If you thought you felt numb before, this was nothing compared to being paralyzed in shock. This wasn’t fight or flight, this was absolute bone chilling mind blanking fear. Beneath all black combat gear you were breaking out in a cold sweat, Tishler’s hand sliding from the side of your arm to the back of your neck.

“Let me guess, it was that damn geneticist that introduced you to Reaper? She’s always had it out for me.” He was squeezing at the back of your neck, holding you in place to look at the litter of red. “Tell me _‘Lightning’_ , does Reaper know who you really are?”

It felt like you were slowly sinking into cement. Your tongue swollen three times its size in your mouth, unable to form any words or any thoughts. You could feel him undoing the clasps at the back of your mask, big fingers working with medical precision to reveal you and you were so numb you couldn’t stop him.

 _“I asked you a question.”_ His voice snarled behind you and it started your heart again, you could feel it pounding like a war drum against your chest, could feel your pulse in your throat.

You had to think fast. You had to be smart about this. Don’t let him shake you.

“No.” You breathed out, slowly gaining your composure. “No, he doesn’t know my true identity.”

“Good.” His voice curled around you like smoke, his smile sticking to your sweat making you shiver and tense.

You wanted to throw up, or pass out. Your helmet was off, and in his hands.

You wanted to turn around and pull the trigger to the handgun strapped to your thigh at his throat.

“Don't worry, pet. I can keep a secret.” He was so clearly happy, so clearly smug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> >:) Trust me, it's worth it in the end.


	8. Control

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stick to the plan, and maybe you won't end up dead.

Mask off and in Tishler's hands you were still partially frozen in fear. Everything in your body told you to turn around and fight, turn around and shove Genji's blades as deep into his chest as you could bury them, but your body wasn't listening. Instead, Tishler shoved you hard at your shoulders into the room. You went stumbling forward, unable to catch yourself on your feet before tumbling down to the ground over petals, smearing them into wood tiles. Your heart beat came back to you, pounding against every vein in your skin. Adrenaline was hitting you hard and fast, survival kicking in as you scrambled across the floor. Tishler’s massive body was looming above you lit behind from white light pouring in through the hallway, fists curling and cracking as he tossed your mask across the room and slammed the door shut behind him.

“You’re going to do exactly what I say, when I say it. Your little secret is only safe for as long as you listen to me.”

“Don't-” You turned in horror to look up at him, surrounded by his shadow. 

“Do you understand your worth to Talon right now?” He bent forward, grabbing you by your armor at your shoulders and pulling you as you kicked and squirmed until you were eye level with him. “You’re surrounded by my agents at all times and you will be under constant supervision, even one wrong move will result in you being dragged down into my lab where I will _personally_ reprogram you.”

“Fuc-”

 _“Language.”_ He growled. “I am being too kind to you, I hope you realize. Kiri was the one who wanted you dead, she would have done anything to ensure your suffered far more than she ever had, but I know you are much more useful with a sharp mind and I will only resort to extreme measures if you give me no other choice. So you're going to be a good pet, otherwise I will make sure every agent in this damn building knows who you are and that you were the person who killed five of my agents.”

You scowled and quickly sprung a knee to his chest knocking the wind of out him, followed by a hard punch to his jaw from below that knocked his teeth together with a horrible clack. The quick succession of hits made him lose his grip on you, your feet fell to the floor and immediately you tried to sprint away so he couldn’t attempt to grapple you again. He twisted to watch you making a break for the door, but his reach was too long and he grabbed tight at your arm forcing a pained groan as he gripped hard into you. 

“There’s no one to run to now!” His voice, his damn voice that dug beneath your skin like worms in dirt, it bellowed out at you.

His grab turned into a body lurching pull, then a throw and you went flying to the other side of the room crashing against an empty desk and sending a shock of pain at your back. The wind was knocked out of you, there you stayed for a moment trying to catch your breath, but he wasn't done yet. He lunged forward attempting to put his big hand on your face but you elbowed him at his side, dodging his grasp and spinning around him. Seeing your opportunity to take him down you jumped to his back, sending an armored fist across his face before you wrapped an arm at his neck, squeezing tight in a choke hold that he smiled through. You could see his face pinking where you hit, could see little scratches from your armor cutting his face open, his nose leaking just a little blood. He tried to shake you off, tried to claw at your armor digging into his skin but you were determined, and super solider strength be dammed, you had a rage inside you that told you to keep holding until his eyes popped from his skull. 

With a terrible grunt, Tishler slammed his body down. You landed on your back, his heavy body crushing yours as you still attempted to choke him out, the back of his head made contact with your lips and you immediately felt the pain of a bruise forming and a cut opening. Rose petals scattered into the air and fluttered around, down down down until you realized he was pinning you and forcing you to release him otherwise his weight would stop your breathing. Your arms went limp at his neck, slipping off and he took that opportunity to flip around and grab at your chin, his entire hand digging nails at your jaw. His usual cocky demeanor was gone, smirking and witty inappropriate comments left and replaced with pure physical strength and horrifically unfeeling eyes.    

“Your commanders are gone. Reaper isn’t here. It’s just you and me now, finally getting that alone time. Tell me, what exactly is it that you’re gaining from working under Reaper, hmm?”

“I’m using him.” You stuttered out as he gripped hard on your chin, your blood running over his fingers. Your mind was panicking trying to quickly come up with a cover story, any lie that could prevent the truth from spilling out of your mouth. “I-I was using him to get to Max.”

“Interesting.” Tishler was chuckling. “Max is just the money man, there are much more powerful people you should be worried about.”

“He’s the one Overwatch has been after for years.” You were shaking, body caught in deep aches from a fight you should have seen coming. “I have to finish what we started.”

“Cute. You’re a real soldier, loyal to Overwatch even after it’s _untimely_ demise. Did Commander Reyes know of your little side gig as Reaper’s second in command?” He was speaking to you as if you were a child, dark eyes under dark lashes looking at you as if he won. You almost wanted to laugh. He was so high and mighty, but he couldn’t even think past what he saw to consider Gabe _was_ Reaper.

Don’t let him shake you. Gabe said to be smart. You hesitated to speak, searching every corner of your mind for a way to twist this in your favor.

“This was my plan.” You snapped your face away from his hand, the bottom of your boots pressing hard to his stomach and kicking you off him. As pathetic as it looked, you crawled away before grabbing the desk for support to stand again. He stood too, waiting for you to continue, impatiently watching as you steadied yourself. You let out a long shaking breath. You'd have to be confident, swallow your pride, for what you were going to say next. "You figured it out. I get it, okay? You own my secret now. What exactly is it that you need me to do?"

"You'll find out soon enough." That creepy smile of his was going to make you sick. "Don't look at me like that, pet. I may try to get a rise from her sometimes, but I would never be unfaithful to Kiri if that is what you're worried about. You'll be doing real work for me and I expect it to be done without questions." 

He turned on his heel, the back of his hand wiping away blood from his nose. Dark eyes studied it for a moment before he looked over his shoulder to you. 

"Yes, sir." You responded through gritting teeth. 

"Come here." He motioned with two his fingers, blood quickly drying against his skin and bruised knuckles. You didn't move and he curled the fist, beating it on the door he stood in front of. "Disobey me again, see what happens." He threatened and you pushed yourself forward to him. "You've given me a lot of trouble now. For your own sake I suggest you really think hard about the position you're currently in."

You should have known he was distracting you with speaking, you were glaring into his eyes as his hand fumbled with something in a pocket. 

All at once you gasped, a hard breath down your throat hurting as air filled your lungs as he grabbed the back of your neck with one hand and pushed something cold to the center of your throat with the other. It felt like you were swallowing jelly, not enough air passing through you to even choke out a cough. He smirked and studied your surprised reaction, dropping his hands to his sides, enjoying your struggle. It felt like a pin prick to the center of your throat, a burning spreading around your neck like a collar but when your hands reached up to touch you only found skin and a small metal piece over the center. Everything was shaking, your hands, your chest, every bone deep in your body from absolute fear. You were trying to scream at him, trying to curse, but nothing was coming out.

A sickening realization hit you, it felt like your neck muscles were straining, like your vocal chords were being squeezed.

It felt like you were being strangled from the inside out.

“That’s my girl.” Tishler smiled at you, his hand pushing blood from your lip to smear across your cheek. “This is just insurance. With this little device I can control whether or not your voice is heard. If you try anything cute you’ll be in my lab before you realize it, so behave. Otherwise it would be my pleasure to watch you breakdown and you'll belong to Talon forever."    

You were deflating, the fear of not being able to talk again, the fear of feeling this strangulation again- it was almost paralyzing. You looked to him with wide begging eyes, unable to tell him that this was far worse than any punch he could land, worse than slowly going crazy with a dozen roses. 

Red blood bleeding into the thick orange curls of his beard, he was still smiling at you. Eyes burned into you. He grabbed your helmet from the floor, checking his own bleeding face in the reflective surface before spitting a mouth full of blood to the ground.

“Be at my lab by 7am sharp. You and I have a lot of work to do.”

The only thing you could do is stare. Neck muscles straining, your whole body threatening to collapse in on itself, you forced yourself to glare with all the hatred you had for him. Something was shifting in your stomach. A feeling of anger and bitter acid. You wouldn’t rest until Cornelius Tishler was dead by your hands.

* * *

“What’s with the troopers outside the door?”

Gabe returned with a half laugh behind his Reaper mask as he slung a heavy bag over his shoulders and locked the door behind him. His jovial mood died off as he laid eyes on your worry stricken face, at the way your shoulders tensed and your fingers nursing a swelling split lip. You couldn't look at him, shame of everything that happened forcing you to consider all the ways he'd be disappointed in you. 

In a flash he was at your side, mask thudding hard against wood, endless black eyes focused on you and plumes of smoke rising into the air around him. His breath was heavy through his nose, controlled but shaking. He dropped his bag heavy to the floor, metal clattering as he fell to his knees in front of you. Jaw clenched, muscles straining, he searched your face for an explanation. You were pressing a bloody tissue to your lip, tongue pressing hard on the back of your teeth trying to make a noise but nothing came. You lifted your eyes to the open door between 313a and 313b and he snapped around to look in. The roses sat there, disturbed from a struggle, deep red petals ground into the wood grain and thrown throughout the room. At a glance the stained wood floors almost looked like a murder scene.

Red roses made you sick now.

Your armor was off, piled neatly at your feet along with the rest of your uniform. Always a creature of habit, you'd searched for a way to feel close to Gabe and painstakingly dressed in one of his plain shirts. The way it hit your body was more like a dress landing on the height of your thighs, but being out of the armor and into something soft was one of the small comforts you could allow yourself until Gabe returned. As you waited for him you'd been tinkering with the metal at your skin. It seemed to be hooked deep into the tissue, if you tried to rip it out on your own you'd bleed out in minutes, and that's being generous. Whatever it was, it wasn't hackable and seemed to share only a one day connection with a remote that you assumed Tishler kept for himself.   

You were patting the tissue to your lips. It hurt to move your mouth. Your lips hurt, your teeth hurt, your whole body ached after fighting back Tishler. Gabe gently pulled the tissue away from your face, looking at the drying blood against stark white. He looked beyond pissed off. A face that radiated not just anger, but absolute hatred.

“Tishler did this to you?” Through gritting teeth his voice was strained, clinging to control.

You nodded slowly and touched the metal piece stuck in the skin of your neck. You opened your mouth as if to say something, but it hurt to lift your lips and you returned the tissue to the split as it began to bleed openly again. You pointed to it and shook your head, eyes begging to tell him you couldn't speak. He grabbed at your face with a calloused hand and forced you to look in his empty black eyes. He understood the look on your face, he understood that the pain you were feeling was familiar. 

“Where is he right now?” He had death in his eyes, a rage that burned deep into your soul.

You studied rising smoke curling into the air above him, watching as the air slowly became black surrounding him. You ran a hand through hair, fingers over greased locks growing longer than you'd ever seen it before- it was flopping down over his ears now. Your fingers trailed along the side of his face, over stubble and into the thick hair around his mouth before you pushed up to touch old scars. He sat perfectly still, allowing you to touch him until smoke around him was separating. Even without pupils you watched his endless black eyes drop their gaze to your neck, staring at long ago unseen scars and the new gift Tishler left you sitting dead center in them. He traced what he saw with light fingertips, his face shifting from pure rage to distant sadness. You leaned forward, parting your lips and keeping a steady gaze with him as you kissed him as gently as you could. 

The hand on your neck moved to your shoulder, his fingers grazing over your skin making you tingle. 

"Fuck our plans." He whispered, moving to kiss a growing bruise on your jaw. "I'll go kill him right now, if you want me to."

You shook your head. 

 _You_ wanted to be the one to kill him. 

Gabe searched your face, biting at the inside of his cheek you watch acceptance slowly growing. He sighed and leaned forward, his face to the crook of your neck and hands slipping over your waist. He held you, hugging you tight until his smoke subsided and you could feel the sweat from his forehead soaking through the collar of the shirt. You twirled curls of his hair around your fingers as he leaned on you to think, raked nails over his scalp as you focused on how satisfied you would feel once Tishler was gone. 

When he lifted his head and his eyes returned to normal you kissed him harder. Kissed him through the pain of a split lip and he had to pull away as you cringed at the feeling of your lips swelling. 

You would have to play this cool. Reaper would need to seem like he was none the wiser, you would need to play along with whatever horrific tasks Tishler asked you to do, but with the help of tapping away messages on your phone, you decided with Gabe on a time table for when you'd put the next pieces of your plan into action. Before you could lay out every moment of Tishler's death, there were still a few puzzle pieces that needed to be put into place- starting with the loyalties of Talon agents. You would need to slowly turn everyone's favor to Reaper, most it seemed were clinging on to specific leaders after Doomfist was removed from power, you'd heard rumors of infighting about who was actually in charge, about who they were most afraid of, and you wanted to ensure Reaper was their top dog before you turned on Tishler so an entire army wouldn't rise against you. 

Morning hours were creeping up on you when everything was set. Your lip scabbed over, constant internal choking becoming more of an annoyance than a constant pain, you curled under the sheets with Gabe. As your exhausted body fell asleep he held you, your bruised face carefully buried in his chest, even when trying to sleep you could feel the rage radiating from him. 

He woke before you did, or he never slept, you honestly weren't sure which. When you cracked open your eyes he was shrugging on a heavy black cloak and pulling a hood over his reaper mask. You watched him, watched how he moved in front of the mirror to twist and turn seeing how it moved over his body. He looked downright terrifying as he clicked on long sharp talons to his fingers, shiny metal that bounced morning sunlight around the room. You pushed yourself up to watch him and felt his gaze land on you in the mirror. He turned to face you as he clasped a metal band over his wrist. 

"What do you think?" He sounded timid, but slowly spun in a circle to show off a full ensemble. Besides the addition of the cloak and the hood he'd made some considerable changes to his gloves.

You furrowed your brows in question and mimed two spikes on his right arm along with the single bracelet. 

"It puts more weight in my punches." He locked the heavy metal bracelet in place. "These-" 

He punched through the air and showed how the spikes on his arm would hook into a body if they were too close. That, additional to the claws and adding more weight to his punch- he was making himself as deadly as possible. You looked to him for a moment, taking in the sight of the terrifying all black uniform and he'd never looked more dangerous. With a small smile you could muster beneath a bruised and swollen lip you threw the blankets off you and walked in a circle around him, pulling at the fabric on his cloak and dragging a hand along the clip of his belt. 

"Keep touching me like that you won't leave this room all day." Gabe growled as you stopped at the front of his waist.

You smirked as much as you could and slid fingers down the front of his pants over the outside of his zipper and felt a familiar jump against your touch. His hand shot down, metal claws resting dangerously against your skin and you genuinely considered what the consequences would be if you just didn't show up when Tishler told you to, if you just stayed in the room with Gabe and let him have his way with you while he wore the uniform of his murderous persona.       

"Put yours on, I have something for you." He purred as he leaned down and slowly moved your hand away. 

As much as you hated to, you pulled on your own armored clothes, shoving your feet into metal Talon boots and clicked your mask over your face. As you stood before him, he brought a similar version of his own cloak over your body and strapped it to your armor. It had the same spine protection as his did, metal pieces curving down your back and the hood, but you left your hood off. He'd left the sleeves open, allowing your hacking gloves to be completely seen. Then he knelt before you, attaching a row of spikes to the front of your metal boots, over the knees and down to the top of the toes. If you kicked anyone with these it was bound to be a gruesome bloody mess.   

Even though your voice was stolen you felt powerful as you looked like this. What Tishler tried to take from you, your pride and your sense of worth, he would never be able to do that as long as you had Gabe at your side. You clicked off your mask as he pulled off his and you pulled him by the shotgun shells strapped to his chest until his face was at your height. 

'I love it.' You mouthed his and you had no idea if he understood you or not but you felt the heat on his cheeks and his arms slipping beneath your cloak to hug you tight. He was trying to be gentle with your injured mouth, but you could feel just how much he wanted to throw you on the bed and not let you out of his sights. 

You wished you could stay, too.

But duty demanded you, and that duties name was Tishler. 

* * *

This time you wandered down the halls of the labs alone. You were able to take in the sights of passed out agents, hazed out men, screaming women, omnics with flickering lights, each person was in the worst shape than the last. Everyone's eyes looked distant, dulled with the same feeling you knew from being under the effects of Moira's drugs. You wanted to help all of them, you wished you could, but the only way to get anyone out of this alive was by sticking to your plan.

It was only Moira in the lab when you opened the doors. She turned to look at you and set down a pen hard to her notebook as she furrowed her brows. The lab smelled like coffee, black coffee just the way she liked it and just the way you remembered it. You wished you could ask her if she missed those days, if she missed you wandering into her lab in the middle of the day and brewing a fresh cup as she scribbled away at something you couldn't understand, but you were doomed to silence and she looked outright uncomfortable that you hadn't said anything yet. 

"It's fairly early for a visit, is there something you need?" 

You looked to the door, anticipating Tishler but you turned your shoulders to face it and pulled down at the covering over your neck to reveal the tiny metal piece in the smallest hope that she knew what it was. Always unreadable, she didn't react to the object and instead shifted on her feet. 

"Is that a no?" 

Fuck. She didn't know. You shouldn't have expected her to, she was never one to try to silence people with technology. You took heavy steps towards her, pushing the fabric back up your neck and stuffing it beneath the mask. She seemed taken aback that you were getting so close to her, but she stood tall with feet firmly planted as you took the pen from beneath her fingers and wrote on the next line in her notes. 

_'He knows who I am.'_

You heard her suck in a sharp breath, felt the way she snapped to look at the door. Her voice lowered to a whisper, even though it didn't have to be.

"Is Gabriel aware?" 

You nodded your head as you backed away. She looked down again, continuing to stare at your handwriting, sucking in her cheeks in worry. Her mismatched eyes stared back at your neck, staring at the spot beneath the fabric where the metal piece was embedded into your skin. Your heart skipped a beat as you heard loud footsteps approaching down the hall, a projected clock in your helmet told you Tishler was three minutes late and you backed away from her hoping she would be able to keep her poker face.

He looked terrible. His freckled skin was marked with bruises from your fight, the darkest mark landing on the base of his chin spreading up to his lips and across his cheek to a swollen black eye. A small victory, you smiled beneath your mask knowing you hurt him even the tiniest bit.  

"What a lovely thing to see in the morning, my two favorite girls." His smile curled over his face and you almost reached for the gun on your thigh to kill him right then and there. 

"Refer to me as such again, Cornelius, and I will see too it that you are sedated for the remainder of the day." Moira turned her back on both of you, quickly snapping her journal shut and shoving it in a bag on the floor. 

"It's always a pleasure, Dr. O'Deorain. You can head out for the day, Lightening here will be my temporary assistant." 

Moira shot you a pointed look, eyes that you knew were her way of telling you stay safe. Wordlessly she hoisted the bag over her shoulder and hurried out the door, her watchful eyes offering you one last glance as she disappeared away and you were left with the only man in the world you didn't want to be alone with. As soon as the doors shut his smile dropped and he glared at you with a dark grimace. With a flick of his wrist and a small button in his hand all the air in the room hit you at once and you were gasping finally able to fully breathe again. 

"Do you remember what I had you do with that security omnic?" He clicked his tongue, getting straight to the point it seemed. You nodded and sucked in deep breaths as if you wouldn't have a chance again. "You're going to help me extract some information from one of my former team members, an omnic who ran details for me back home. I want you to hack into them and force them to tell the truth about betraying me to the police." 

"You're not asking me to do something easy, Tishler." You breathed. "The security before was simple, programmed for one function. Those that are meant for free thought and to interact the same way humans are is next to impossible to change their coding." 

"I was once told it was impossible to reprogram a human." He stared into your eyes, even though the mask. "I suggest you figure it out." 

He led you to a room with a glass door. Buzzing cuffs were keeping an omnic in place, held to a metal chair and you could hear every clink as he moved when Tishler greeted the terrified omnic. He'd been stripped of his clothing, left as metal and lights knocking against the chair and struggling against restraints. You wondered what you would do if you were in his position, mind wandering to even the most extreme options of losing a hand just to escape. Although the voice restrainer was on, you stood silently at the omnics side, mask scanning the internal workings of its model for anything you could exploit to hack in. 

Tishler made himself comfortable, sitting with his legs wide at a chair in the corner of the room. He was watching your every move, watching to make sure you were doing exactly what he wanted. You wanted to cry. How do you program free will, or a spirit? In humans you could break them. Drug them and trick them just like Tishler did, but with an omnic you were breaking into their very brain, scrambling around their thoughts and memories, rooting through things you'd never be able to on a human, things the brain was made to hide. At least humans could be pushed to a limit if someone continued further and further into their subconscious. At least humans could die. Omnics weren't given that luxury.

Instead you silently let tears fall down your cheeks as you hunted through lines of text, roots of codes that made this omnic who they were. You accidentally sent sparks down their body a couple times, a pain that you could only imagine would be similar to being prodded at. You felt dirty. You felt disgusting and wrong. Tishler was encouraging you with every enhancement of your hacking system, smiling every time you dug out little pieces of information.

The omnic used to work for Tishler back in Scotland. He was essentially the head of the household, the protector of all Tishler's secrets. You bit back a quivering lip as he admitting to ratting Tishler out to the local authorities, but even after that exhausting process Tishler still wasn't done. He was convinced the omnic knew _something_ about Arntz's whereabouts.     

You stayed in that cell with an omnic prisoner and Tishler blocking the door for the whole day. You'd mumbled about needing to eat or use the restroom, and he straight faced it as he told you that you were more than welcome to use the toilet in the corner of the cell. You weren't allowed the basic human needs, you weren't allowed privacy until Tishler got what he wanted, and that meant staying there writing out code nonstop for over ten hours. He was going to find out where Arntz was, he was convinced the omnic knew where Arntz was, and you weren't leaving this room until he knew. 

At the ten and half hour mark, you broke the omnic. 

"Indi-" Its voice sputtered out. "In-In-In-" 

Lights died. 

The body of the omnic hunched over, lifeless. Your chest was rising and falling with hard terrified breaths. Your whole body felt like it broke out in a cold sweat. This felt different, this felt _wrong_. This omnic didn't deserve the fate it got, being tortured by a faceless woman demanded by a man mad with power. 

You were wrong about omnics not being able to die from this. 

You pushed him too far,  _killed_ him.  

Tishler had a rage in his eye and he stood with fists already curled.

 _"India?"_ Tishler yelled. He turned his face, seemingly in thought, lost in anger. "Have a bag packed by tomorrow, you and I are going to India first thing in the morning."

You tried to speak, tried to stop him but he clicked the button between his fingers and all at once you were dropping to your knees unable to take in full breaths again. 

You could pack your bags. You could go with him. You would do what he asked, but you knew as soon as you heard it. Arntz wasn't in India. _She was in Indiana._  


	9. Let's Take Over The World Together

Tishler was downright smug when Reaper stopped you as you boarded a private jet with the Talon team. In his eyes he'd won. In his mind you were an object that belonged to him, one he could use to hack anything he pointed at, one that would fight his fights for him at his command. It made you sick. He thought he was _your commander._

“Some second in command you had, Reaper. So easy to convince her to switch to my team. Don’t worry, I’ll allow you to have my sloppy seconds.” His thin smile spread across a still bruised face and you wanted nothing more than to scream how fucking _stupid_ he sounded.

You heard Gabe chuckle beneath his mask, sure he could feel you rolling your eyes behind your own. His little messages sent to you encouraging you to keep going, that the pay off would be worth it, were the only thing that kept you sane as you pretended to work for the redheaded idiot.  

“Lucky for you I do not need her skills at the moment. Don’t forget who she’s loyal to, Tishler.” He was leaning close to Tishler, talons curling into his fist. "One word and she'd drop you." 

“Jealousy is an ugly color on you, my friend. I’ll be sure to return her in, at least, one piece.” Tishler placed a tight hand on the back of your neck and squeezed. You wished you could cough but your air restriction wouldn’t allow it. He turned to you with a terrible smile. “Anything to add, Lightning my dear?”  

If you could spit on him, you would have. Instead you sat in your forced silence staring at a smug smile that you couldn’t wait to wipe off of him.

"Good pet." He praised and pushed you towards the plane door. 

You turned to look at Gabe, one last longing stare before you were whisked away with a team you didn't trust, under the orders of a man you couldn't wait to kill. If you had known how long it would be before you returned back to the Talon base, you could have just finished the job there and then. You would have pushed him into the blades of the propeller, you would have cracked his skull on the pavement. You would have never stepped on that plane. 

You couldn’t breathe for five months.

Five fucking months.

The longer this lasted, the more it felt like you were being choked to death. He refused to let you have your voice for five painstaking terrible months. Each day you grew all the more angry, you bottled up a rage that threatened to explode at any given moment. It started with sweeping Tishler's home in India for Arntz. You search nearby Talon safe houses, known addresses for as he put it "mutual acquaintances". All the while you stayed silent. Some nights you almost broke down and wanted to explain your theory, wanted to scream to Tishler that she was probably at the home of the man who started her downfall- but the thought of going to that home, to a home that you were going to share with someone who at one point you thought was the love of your life? You couldn't bear it. If she was there you were going to face her, and you were going to face her _without_ Tishler. 

So instead you went on a wild goose chase for five months. When you weren't "of use" Tishler would keep you locked away in a private room in the back of the drop ship, you were a prisoner to him although that's not how he saw it. When you were alone you would message with Gabe, long conversations about how training Talon agents was going, you'd dig up dirt on the other Talon leaders and send it to him to deal with in person. He was aching for you to come back, and it was killing you to be away. As you hopped from country to country, home to home, you increasingly noticed his team's fear about you subsiding. They saw you as weak. They saw you as someone who was bending to the will of their commander, unwilling or unable to push back. 

And you snapped.  

Under Tishler’s watchful eyes and with a team of five other agents you cleared through his extravagant apartment in the heart of Japan. You led the head of the pack with scans for traps and signs of life. You were already in a bad mood after comms went down for over a week, you hadn't been able to message Gabe like you were. That day, not being able to speak felt particularly strangling. Not being able to breathe under the mask was slowly building a feeling of panic trapped at the back of your throat. You were breathing as hard as you could. A feeling twisting like smoke in your stomach desperate to pour from your lips both scared and drove you. It felt like annoyance, or pure anger. The agents he sent you in with twisted through halls and into rooms with weapons drawn and flashlights searching every corner. The anger in you was boiling away.

“She’s not here.” One of the agents mumbled into his headpiece. “Do you want me to put together the usual-”

Enough.

You had _enough_. 

While he was distracted talking to Tishler, you raised your gun to the back of his helmet. Five bullets left in the chamber, five agents. Five was your lucky number.

Before he could finish his sentence you pulled the trigger, the echoing shot that rang out drew the attention of stunned agents who froze and stared your direction.  

“Sir-!” Another agent started, but you shot straight through their helmet as well.

Their body crumpled to the floor in an instantly lifeless mess. Even though your air was restricted, you tried to breathe in deep calming breaths. Something about executing people this way, something about one bullet a head, clean shots and dead Talon agents, it just put your mind at ease. You reached up to your helmet and disconnected the earpiece to Tishler, throwing his voice across the room so you wouldn't have to listen to him screaming for updates. Instead you calmly stepped over bodies and to the window over looking a long city skyline. He may be an asshole, but he had good taste at least.  

When Tishler found you there among the bodies, you had already wiped blood from your mask. Stark white towel soaked in red you threw it to the floor next to one of his lifeless agents.

“You fucking bitch.” He growled through gritting teeth as he stepped over their bodies towards you.

You gave him a disapproving face even though he wouldn’t be able to see it through your mask and squared your shoulders, ready for another fight with him. For someone who always told you to watch your language, he seemed quick to resort to fighting words. He was big, big enough that you were at least a little scared when he came at you, but Gabe taught you how to fight against someone his size. He swung at you, intending to hit your mask and break it, but you dodged and quickly tried to roll to evade him. He grabbed you by the arm, pulling you back his way before slamming you down to the floor and pinning you with a heavy knee to the middle of your back. 

“You're going to regret this, you stupid brat." 

He unlatched your mask, lifting it just enough to get to the nerves at the back of your neck. You would have gasped, if you could, as you struggled beneath him and thought back to the time he pinched you in France and forced you into unconsciousness. 

* * *

 When you woke your neck was stiff and sore, it was dark and you were trapped in something small, maybe not that much larger than a coffin. Frantically you ran a scan on your mask to find out where you were, only to be more confused when it indicated you were back at Talon HQ. Outside of your stone encasement you heard two voices arguing, deep ones that sounded almost as if they might just start an all out fight. As you were focusing on the voices the front of the case slid open, and you stumbled out into a dimly lit room- as you stood to attention it dawned on you that you were in the Talon council meeting room, the long marble table sat stoic as ever in the center, the cases on the side of the room all laid dormant expect for the one you came falling out of.

Hands gripped you before you could orient yourself, Tishler grabbing at your arms and twisting holding them tight behind you with one hand. You struggled against him before looking to the person he was arguing with, Reaper who was shaking his head slowly at you. Trusting him, you stopped fighting against the man. If it seemed to easy for him to subdue you he didn’t notice, he was riding a power high of being able to control you. You wanted to laugh. Poor Tishler couldn’t have realized how entirely _little_ control he had, but Gabe did and he stepped towards you both. In your stomach you knew, you could feel that this was it. Behind your mask you were smirking, you were biting your lip just thinking about how good it was going to feel to watch his smug expression change.  

“You’re a fool, Reaper. Trusting a woman like this, you’re even dumber than that outfit of yours. Haven’t you ever wondered who she is under this mask?”

“I never needed to question her identity.” He was pacing towards you like a predator to prey. You were smiling at his deceit. “Her skills are enough.”  

“You ought to know-” Tishler pulled at the zipper on the front of your uniform, opening an armored jacket to a black tank top. With an angry grunt he revealed the long scars on your arms dropping your jacket to the floor, burns and cuts from a lifetime ago when things were simply black and white. “Do you recognize her? She’s got some lovely little pictures online with a former Overwatch commander.”

You struggled against him at that. The thought of Tishler using those pictures against you again made your blood boil. Morrison wouldn’t want anyone to use those pictures as leverage, if hurt you to even think about what he would say now seeing this. His grip returned to your now uncovered arms holding you back and you watched as smoke started above Gabe’s shoulders. Tishler slid a hand up the side of your arm straight to the latches on the back of your helmet.

In a moment of focus you took in a shaky breath.

You could feel it in the air, you could feel Gabe’s energy in front of you.

A silent agreement that this was it.

He took a few heavy steps forward until he was directly in front of you. Sandwiched between the two gigantic men, Tishler ripped off your helmet and tossed it far. He was holding your arms behind you hard enough to bruise, threatening to break, but you pushed your hips towards Gabe with a little smile spread across your face and he reached out a clawed hand, holding at your jaw carefully as if he was inspecting you.

“She’s a spy, she’s still working for _Overwatch_.” Tishler growled, a certain smugness obvious in his voice. “I have the perfect plan for her, too. Once I reprogram her she’ll never be disobedient again and we can learn everything about Overwatch we weren’t able to since Doomfist made his impulsive decision.”  

The Reaper mask cocked to the side, behind it you could feel him smiling but to anyone else it would be terrifying. Tishler let out a satisfied laugh. He _really_ thought he got you. The smoke around his shoulders was getting thicker.

His claws moved in comforting motions across the skin of your cheek and Tishler made a repulsed noise as he looked down to see you placing a kiss on a metal talon with a sly smile.

“Where is the remote you use to control her voice?” Gabe asked and you felt his words booming through your body like an earthquake.

“You already knew.” Tishler stepped back, the breathless horror obvious in his gasp.

As he moved away from you, he released you from a rough hold and you caught yourself before stumbling backwards. He moved to grab something from his pocket, but Gabe dropped to the floor in a flurry of smoke and appeared behind him, throwing his arms to the side and digging talons into the backs of Tishler’s hands. With a pained scream a button flew from his fingers to the ground, one you dove for and pressed. Immediately air hit your lungs and you felt as if you were breathing in life itself. Too long, too damn long you spent in silence and unable to breathe properly. Gabe slammed Tishler against the wall with a terrible crack when his face met the cold stone. He was holding him down, sharp metal talons digging into the skin of his back to keep him still as the backs of his hands bled from being ripped at with the claws.

“She’s the enemy, don’t you care?” Tishler groaned out as his eyes glared over his shoulder. “She’ll turn on you!”

Still trying to talk his way out of this, still thinking Reaper was on his side he groaned as talons sunk into his skin. Gabe laughed, a dark laugh that at one point you would have been scared of, but now it sent a warm shiver down your spine. He carefully clicked off his own mask. Watching Tishler’s face fall, watching the recognition, the _horrified recognition_ , now that was something you wished you’d recorded so you could watch to put yourself to sleep at night.    

"No, you're both supposed to be dead!" He trashed around beneath Gabe's claws, attempting to swing at Gabe. 

The two punched at each other as you cleared your throat and found your lost voice again.

"You really are everything Arntz said you are. Useless. A failure." Tishler turned his attention to you and shoved Gabe away before lunging your direction. 

" _Don't_ talk about her, you don't even know her anymore." His brows were furrowed, bruised knuckles curling readying to fight you down.   

You flipped Genji’s knife from your pocket into your palm motioning at Gabe to hold him. He circled the redhead and grappled both arms behind him then holding the butt of one of his shotguns to the side of Tishler's head. He squirmed against Gabe, glaring down at you as you teased the tip of the blade against the fabric of his shirt, down, down, down, from his wide chest over hard muscles. He was shaking. 

"If you kill me, you're no better than I am." He tried to reason with you, tried to reverse the inevitable. 

You faked a gasp, feigned surprise at the revelation that you were sinking to his level. His eyes darted around the room searching for ways out as you clicked your tongue and held the edge of his shirt as you pushed the knife up, cutting open the front of a skin tight shirt. He moved with confusion as you tore off a large section and tucked the blade between your arm and side. He froze when you moved to his belt, undoing the front and ripping it from his hips.

“What is this?” He demanded, voice unsure where you were going with the aggressive undressing.

“Can’t have you alerting the other agents, can we?” You spoke to him like he was a child.

He opened his mouth to question, giving you the perfect opportunity to stuff in the balled up section of shirt. He snarled and tried as hard as he could to resist it, but you pushed the fabric and held it against his lips as Gabe helped you wrap the belt around Tishler’s head, the magnetic buckle resting over his mouth.

Shirt hanging open at his sides, mouth gagged, Gabe kicked at the back of his knees sending Tishler to the floor. You stood above him, power and anger coursing through your veins. Seeing him like this, weak without his backup, weak without his drugs, weak without Arntz was everything you'd ever wanted.

“Look at me.” You growled.

Tishler lifted his eyes, dark beneath furrowed brows and the scar curling over his skull, he locked eyes with his death. You started with a hard blow to the center of his face. Your knuckles cracked his nose, blood steamed out of nostrils and down over the belt buckle. He stayed conscious, he stayed _angry_ , so you hit him again. Gabe stayed silent, stayed observant as you struck with all the super strength you could muster against his cheek. When you pulled back there was a growing pink mark across his skin, you could hear him swallowing his own blood but he was trying to keep a straight face.    

“Get him up.” You demanded to Gabe, he leaned down and lifted him by hooking his arms beneath Tishler’s.

As he stood you circled around them, dragging your hand along Gabe’s belt, beneath his cloak and to the back clip. He stood still as you unclipped a tactical stick, a heavy tool meant to break thick glass, but you knew you could put enough force on it to do what you wanted to do. As you rounded Gabe you passed his smirking face, endless eyes watching you with unbreaking attention.

“You look good like this.” He smiled.

“Angry?”

“Deadly.” His _voice_ , you could have jumped on him right then, but you couldn’t focus on him just yet. Instead you tossed the breaker in the air, spinning it around until you were back in front of Tishler.

“Let go of him. I want to see if he’s still got any fight.”

Gabe released him and stepped back as he removed his cloak, seemingly preparing for the mess that was about to be made and placed it to hang over the back of the red chair at the head of the meeting table. Tishler was unsteady on his feet, eyes still pointed to you through a swelling lid. He lunged forward, as he did you got a good look at the damage Gabe’s claws did to the back of Tishler’s hands. He’d torn the skin open, blood covered knuckles and fingers and he could barely move them. You dodged him, clicking your tongue in judgement.

“Try again, asshole.” You dared and he ran at you with arms attempting a grab, but you dropped low to the ground and with all your strength slammed a pointed end of the glass breaker into his kneecap.

From the gag in his mouth he cried out an awful muffled scream. As soon as the tool made contact you could feel his body give, you could feel the bone beneath the skin shattering. He fell forward, bloody hands reaching for his knee attempting to hold it steady but you were quick, you caught his pants pocket and pulled hard forcing him to the ground and you kicked him with all of your strength at his side landing with the spikes on the front of your boot. You broke the skin in a line up his side causing him to writhe in pain. He tried to get up, tried to push his body and will.

Again. You kicked him again, and again, and again, until his side was an unrecognizable guesome mess that you ended up hitting bone on.

 _“Get him up.”_ You demanded a second time. Gabe lifted his twitching body, you could see the fight still left in Tishler’s eyes. A smug smile that told you he thought there was no way you’d go through with this.  

Your fingers curled around the grip of Genji’s blade again, slowly drawing it from its place at your side and you eyed Tishler’s throat for a weak point. Gabe held his arms behind him, his body was leaning heavily on one uninjured knee and a destroyed side forcing him to hunch over. A clawed glove grabbed Tishler by the top of his head and jerked it back, giving you as much room to work with as possible across his neck.

You traced the tip of the blade down over Tishler’s chin, over a bobbing adam’s apple, then to the center where you hesitated for just a moment, looking into Gabe’s endless waiting eyes. The air shifted just a little bit colder, your skin buzzed with excitement. Somewhere deep in your nostrils you breathed in the smell of forest fire, you released all the anger you had towards towards the life you had before and breathed in acceptance that you were about to be someone you spent so long denying you'd become. With Genji's knife to his throat you become Gabe's worst nightmare and his greatest prodigy.

With  all the strength you could manage, you shoved Genji’s blade into the soft center of Tishler’s throat.

It felt different than any time you’d used the blade in combat. There was no hard armor to get through, no bone stopping the blade. Instead it was soft tissue, digging the sharp edge severing nerves, you could feel the little twitch of give as you pushed it as deep in his neck as you could. Bright red crept between the blade and his skin and you offered him a sweet smile before you joined both hands over the handle to twist the blade in his neck with the same motion as a key in a lock.

The noise that he made was horrific, a crunching choking sound of a throat in distress before blood spurted from a stretching wound and sprayed over your face and chest. At first you gasped from it, sickened from the noise in an otherwise silent room but then to hear Gabe’s satisfied sigh, to see the light flickering in Tishler’s eyes was just _everything_ you wanted it to be.

After a moment of shock, a moment of looking into Gabe's endless eyes and feeling absolutely unstoppable, you twisted that blade hard. Hard enough to make up for every rose and horrible gift he’d sent you, hard enough to make him suffer for warping Arntz into a vile version of herself, harder still when you thought about all the dead bodies he’d left behind from failed experiments.

Your breathless shock turned into a sadistic laugh and in that laugh you tore the blade through his muscle and skin far to the side, opening his neck wide.

Months ago during some late night messaging where you talked about all the ways you wanted to take Tishler out, Gabe warned you the neck would bleed a lot but you didn’t expect it to spray out the way it did when you severed a main artery. His body was twitching, chest jumping trying to catch breaths it never would, eyes so wide they looked like they would pop right out of the sockets.

“Nothing to say, Tishler?” You wiped his blood from your lips with the back of your hand, effectively smearing it across your cheek.

Gabe, holding Tishler back now much looser, was breathing hard with his endless black eyes and smoke surrounding the air above him with the taste of death in front of him. Tishler tried to use what was left of his strength to swing at you, Gabe let go of him to see what he would strength he had left, but instead of swinging at you, or trying to fight, Tishler’s body stumbled backwards at an impossible angle to the meeting room table falling heavy against the side. His bloodied broken face landed with a dull thud onto the hard marble top, his chest weighed him down like an anchor as his legs hung off the edge of the table.  

Beneath your skin you felt burning hot, a rush of something unlike anything else you’d experienced before in your life. You locked eyes with Gabe who was shuttering and keeping his gaze only on you. Your body felt hot. Was this how Gabe felt when he killed the other Talon leaders? It felt _good_. You didn’t want to stop now.

Tishler was hunched over heavy on the stone table, curling weak hands near his throat and suffering through horrific pain. His skin paled and his lips looked like they were turning ashy, he was trying to trash around but couldn’t find the strength. With a cheeky smile to Gabe, you climbed onto the edge of the table, next to Tishler’s body and you watched his eyes frantically searching for help that would never come. His body was still clinging on, struggling to a thread of life.

As you sat and stared as smoke caressed your skin, sneaking up your arms, curling into the base of your hair and the smoke held you until Gabe was directly in front of you. You were studying the pool of blood quickly growing beneath him on the tabletop and the way he tried to move his body but was too weak. He was laying in a growing pool of his own blood, you could hear the struggling choking sounds still leaving through the hole in his throat. 

“Ugh, how long does it take to bleed out?” You turned to Gabe. He stared back at you with blank eyes and a chest falling with heavy controlled breaths. 

He shot a hand to your throat, palm pressing down but fingers loose. You sucked in a sharp breath, unsure if he was finally giving in to nightmares after seeing you commit your very own atrocity or if he loved what he was seeing just a little too much.  

“I can't wait anymore.” His voice was low and he pulled you forward, one hand on your neck the other on your leg, claws on his gloves digging in just enough to send a spike of heat through your nerves.

He pushed his body between your legs, spreading them wide as he brought you into a desperate kiss. He didn’t care about Tishler’s blood splattered across your skin. He didn’t care that you smelled like death. He kissed you hard, he kissed you with a mouth that told you from this point on you were his and his alone, that he was going to support you through even your wildest of decisions.

“I missed you.” He smiled against your cheek.

"Fuck, Gabe." You were pulling off your belt, undoing the front of your pants with frantic hands. "I missed you so much."

His fingers left your throat to help pull your pants off, heavy with protective armor they fell to the floor with a dull thud along with one of Gabe’s gloves. You didn’t even get the chance to lift your shirt all the way before his ungloved hand was between your legs. You moaned and dropped your head forward against his chest as he teased a finger along your folds. The smoke at his midsection was still swirling into the air and even though you knew he was dangerous like this, even though you knew you should have told him to calm down, all you wanted to do was give into him and let him take whatever he wanted.

With a heavy sigh you dropped your back to the table and pushed your tank top and bra over your head and to the ground. You laid there, wearing only blood splatter and a metal chip at your throat, next to a man with lifeless eyes as Gabe pushed thick fingers into you. Your toes curled in the air, your body squirmed with his movements as he quickly started pumping in and out of you. As fingers curled in you against your nerves, he ran his gloved hand down your body and pooling blood crept against your skin, curling up against the scars on your arm and side. Sharp talons dragged over your skin light enough not to cut.

“You’re beautiful.” He smiled, fingers leaving you as the backs of claws grazed down your stomach, past your belly button, further and further. You caught your breath as cold metal rolled over your sensitive clit, dragging down between wet folds before he stepped back and fell into the red leader’s chair next to the meeting room table.   

“Gabe, I want you-” Your hips lifted from the table, squirming with a need to have him in you. Sat low in the chair he watched as you withered and whined for him.

“You’re not ready yet.” He chuckled. “Show me how much you want me.”

Pushing yourself up with an annoyed huff you leaned on one arm and brought your hand between your legs. Thighs shaking, your legs hung off the side of the table while you slipped fingers easily in. You lifted your eyes, hair falling over your forehead with blood soaked ends obscured your view of Gabe slowly pumping himself as he sat across from you. He had a lazy smile on his lips, endless black eyes fixated on you beneath heavy lids. You tried to breathe in time with your own fingers, watching his hand around his cock twitching every time you made little noises made your whole body rush with warmth. He’d managed to get his tactical shirt off, but the pants stayed on, opened at the front and pushed down just enough. He leaned his chin in the palm of his gloved hand, his longer than normal hair flopping over his head to the side.

“Enjoying yourself?” You sighed with a sarcastic tone as you parted your fingers, hoping to stretch yourself even just slightly enough to be able to take him with no challenge, but you knew that was a blissful pipe dream.

“Absolutely.” Stupid smirk. That dumb smile. He knew he was driving you crazy.

You groaned and pushed yourself from the table, moving to stand between his wide legs. Making sure his eyes stayed on you, in one graceful movement you brought a foot up to press against his hip, the other standing steady on the floor and you made a show of sliding your hand between your legs to return fingers to your soaked hole. The gloved hand he was leaning his chin on moved to wrap around your calf, keeping you in place with your foot against his hip as he watched you finger yourself.

His breathing was picking up, the hand at his lap moving faster. It wasn’t long before you were shaking, spending all those months as what was basically a captive, nights often spent listening to Gabe talk about all the dirty things he wanted to do to you- you were beyond pent up. It had been too long since you’d been touched by anyone, let alone by Gabe, and still riding the mental high you were riding on after killing Tishler wasn’t making it any easier to hold back.

“You're so wet-” Gabe said under his breath as his black eyes stared between your legs. Your cheeks burned as you realized your inner thighs were slippery mess and you were quickly becoming insatiable.

“Fuck, Gabe please. I’m ready for you, I promise. I need you-”

His hand left his center to grab your wrist. With a wicked smile he brought your glistening fingers to his lips, sucking them hard as claws curled around your leg in unhinged pleasure. He kept sucking, eyes locking with yours, daring you to take your fingers from him. With your free hand you ran fingers through his hair, softly at first, loving even at first, before you reached the back of his head and pulled at the base of his hair hard enough to make him gasp and chuckle low from his chest.

“Gabriel Reyes, if you don’t fuck me right now I swear I’ll swap you out for the dead man-”

“You're lucky its been so long, otherwise I'd make you keep going.” He pulled you down against him, rocking his cock against your folds and hitting your swollen clit. You let out a long moan, burying your face in the crook of his neck and digging your nails into his shoulder as your body settled with your legs on either side of his lap.

He lowered his hands to your thighs, fingers and claws running up the back of them until he was grabbing you right where your ass and thighs met. He lifted you, adjusted you into place over him as you held tight to his shoulders and tried to move your hips until you felt him pressing at your entrance. A long breath left you as you closed your eyes in a moment of preparation, you shook as you were reminded just how big he was. 

You were never good at being patient.

All the air from your lungs left you as you slowly lowered yourself onto him. There was a brief a moment where you thought maybe you had somehow managed to stretch yourself enough and not feel like he’d break you in half, the end of his tip slid in easily, but once his head pushed deeper you were seeing white as your walls constructed and your entrance twitched. You froze, legs shaking and nails sunk into Gabe’s skin. He was smiling, on the verge of laughing that you once again got ahead of yourself, too desperate to have him in you. Some of the stress on your body was eased with Gabe holding you above his lap, otherwise you feared you might just collapse and force yourself to take him all at once- a thought that almost made you pass out just thinking about.

While you were busy breathing, Gabe slowly began rocking his hips. You groaned, every gentle push further in making your head light. He tried to warn you that you weren’t ready, but you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of being right, instead you tried to relax your body and allow him to do the work of working you wide open.

“That’s it.” He whispered against your blood soaked hair. “You’re doing so good. Just a little more.”

 _Just a little more_ , you would roll your eyes if you could. You’d barely taken a quarter of him and already you were sensitive beyond belief. He leaned forward and kissed along your throat, his lips dragging on your skin as he lowered you against him with gentle pushes to your hips. You realized you were twitching with every rock deeper, your walls pulsing against him making your heart jump and your nerves spark. He was stretching you past your limits, reminding you of why you sat weird after the first time you slept together, but you wanted him, more and more of him, you wanted all of him. He wasn't even in you all the way but your fingers had worked you into a frenzy, your long wait without him making you too sensitive to the rush he was giving you.  

Your head was spinning, you were already so close. 

“I-” You tried to speak but your mind wasn’t catching up with your body yet. His hands squeezed at you, lips curled into a smile against your skin.

“It’s okay, I can feel you.” He was sighing. He knew your body just as well as you did, maybe even better than you did at this point. He knew you were close, your body just one right push away from breaking out into an orgasm. His face lowered, mouth curling around your nipple with a testing bite before he spoke again. “I’m going to move a little faster. Cum for me.”

You gasped as he bit harder, as he pulled out only to rock in just a little further hitting a bundle of nerves in you that bursted heat across your body. You shook and tugged at his hair, mouth open and eyes staring up to a dark ceiling lost in a sea of pleasure that rocked through you. He was done waiting. You were done waiting. Now that you had him you were going to ride this high for as long as you could. While you were coming undone around him, he took the opportunity to drive deeper and deeper into you. Bouncing your blood covered body in his lap. 

As you spiraled down from a high he was holding your body close, hugging it against him and riding into like this would be his only chance. Your mind was blanking, mouth hanging open as he hilted in you and you’d never felt so full before in your life. He seemed like he would be able to break you in half with just a twitch of his hips, or like he’d puncture right through the center of you.

He lifted his head to stare at your dazed out face, nudging you with his nose to make sure you were still responsive. 

“You’re too fucking big, Gabriel.” You sighed as you slowly worked your way into a bouncing movement.

With fingers pulling at the ends of his hair he parted his lips which you took in with a deep kiss. He moaned against you, soaking in every moment of pulsing against your walls and tasting the power on your lips. Hands held you, supporting your back. One soft and warm, fingers that slid from your spine to your ass to grab you hard and feel your body bouncing, the other cold and clawed digging into the skin at your shoulder blades. Even though you were the one on top, your hips circling in his lap, he was still pumping up, pushing deeper and deeper in to you with thrusts that told you he was still in charge.

Endless eyes looked at you with a dark expression. His hand traced up your skin, fingertips leaving behind goosebumps that gave you shivers until he wrapped his hand around your throat. Just touching you like that, the sight of his hand at your neck, you could feel the deep twitch from his cock in you, could feel _exactly_ how much he’s wanted this.

“If it’s too much, pull my hair.” He said with a pause, waiting for you to respond before he gave in to fantasies he’d spent so much time denying.

“Yeah.” You breathed, lacing one hand in place at the back of his hair, dropping the other to your center and circling a finger against your clit.

He adjusted his hand a few times, moving the fingers to place them just right. By the way he was gripping you, it almost seemed like he was trying to cover the bruises only he could see with his black eyes. Satisfied with the angle, a slow pressure built as you began to bounce again in his lap. You kept your eyes on his, at first watching for any subtle changes, any tell that this was more than just a fantasy meant to get him off. You could feel him staring back into your eyes, fingers rubbing against your skin with some hesitation, he was chewing at the corner of his lip, focused in on the feeling of you tense beneath his hand.

“I trust you.” You whispered, allowing your body to completely relax, your shoulders to drop and letting your body fall as deep as you could against him. Bouncing became careful grinding as you dropped your head back and he sucked in a sharp breath before squeezing at your throat.

Stifled moans left you as he gripped harder. Lazy fingers at your clit became fast, rubbing in frantic circles as the feeling of him filling you completely and holding you like this took over. Your skin felt like it was tingling, mind flying high in the clouds in pleasured bliss. You could hear him, could hear the heavy shaking breaths, the worshiping whispers slipping between his lips. He was getting exactly what he wanted after all this time, you were giving in to him completely and nothing in the world could ever bring him down from knowing you were completely his. Air was limited. No worse than it was when the device in your skin restricted it, but the hand at your throat continued carefully past that point. Your fingers shook on your clit as Gabe’s face was lost in lust. Between his own breaths he was sighing, moaning and begging thanking you with sweet nothings.

“You’re too good to me.” He whispered as he swelled in you.

“Harder.” You choked out with a smile.

Too eager to please you he squeezed rough and for the first time you finally felt just the smallest twitch of fear you had the night he first wrapped his hands at your throat. You grabbed his gloved hand, moving it from the side of your leg to meet his other hand at your neck and you circled against his lap working yourself, chasing the edge.  

“It’s too much.” He gasped, dropping the clawed hand away back at its place on your side.

You felt him, felt the pulse deep inside that almost lost control. He was so close, you could feel how close he was and all you wanted was for him to have every thought of you like this fulfilled. Your head was going light, skin going numb and fingers loosing feeling. He choking you, really cutting off your air the way he had so long ago. He watched your face dropping, felt your body giving into him too much.

After a shuddered breath he released your throat, sending you into an unintentional coughing fit. He waited with his hand hovering away from you, watching your reaction as air filled your lungs once again. With a defiant big motion you lifted your hips and dropped down hard on him, forcing a deep moan from the man with the endless eyes.

“I said _harder_ , Gabriel.” You finally managed to cough out.

His nervous expression quickly changed to one that challenged you, this time he shot to your neck and squeezed with no hesitation. With a smirk on his lips he pulled you forward as he held you tight, bringing you in for a breathless kiss. Beneath you he snapped his hips up, driving into you again and again as his grip tightened.

Over and over he would build you up to a point where your mind went foggy, only releasing you the moment before you knew you’d start to fade. You were shaking, trying desperately not to cum again until he was ready. Between his size and his hand you were almost at your limit.

You kissed him again, softer this time with blushing cheeks pressing to his and his hand fell loose from your neck, back down around you to hug you close. You could feel how sore your neck was where he was holding it, could feel the red warmth of a hand now at your back. You kissed to the side of his lips, over a scruff covered jaw and down to his neck.

“You need to shave.” You laughed before kissing the side of his throat.

He chuckled and that chuckle quickly turned to a lustful moan as you sucked on sensitive skin. Your hips were tightening as you worked him, the feeling of being so close to the edge almost being too much to bear when he grabbed at your ass and snapped into you enough to make you see stars.

“F-fuck, keep going Gabe-”

“In or out?” He breathed in a hurried question, his face told you all you needed to know- he was about to lose his grip. 

“In.”

You snapped your hips down as hard as you could and grinded against him feeling the much needed pulses of a man who couldn’t control his release any longer. Your coil snapped as well, heat bursting from deep in your stomach making your entire body tingle. You felt your sweat rolling down over blood soaked skin. Gabe looked like he was in a state of exhausted bliss, his head dropping back against the deep red leader's chair. Deep groans led to long sighs, his clawed glove held you gently at your back but his uncovered hand was gripping hard enough to bruise at your ass. You felt him, warm and thick inside you, pressing between your walls and his slowly softening cock.

In the quiet of the meeting room you listened only to the sound of Gabe catching his breath, and you turned over your shoulder to look at your handiwork.

Tishler laid destroyed and lifeless against the marble table. Blood from his throat and bashed in side spread across the top of the stone and spilled down onto the floor, still dripping every so often. The knee you shattered was now resting beneath him at a horrific angle, the skin of his hands and skull ripped from talon marks and a belt still tightly bound over a face that was tinting a sickly blue. He was dead. He dead because you murdered him and it was the best you'd felt in a long time. You felt vindicated. Logically, you knew he wasn't the reason Jack was dead, that he wasn't the reason Overwatch was burned to the ground, that he wasn't the reason you had to choose between love or loyalty, but seeing him like this validated all the choices you'd made to get to this point. 

“We should get dressed, contact the other council members.” You wondered aloud as you stared at Tishler’s bloody twisted body.

Before Gabe could protest to staying in you for just a few more moments, heavy knocking came from the door to the hall.                   

“Sir? Sorry to interrupt, we-”

Black surrounded you. Smoke obscuring your body and face, it was a bizarre sensation completely engulfed in wisps of him. You could feel him absolutely everywhere, on every inch of skin, tangling through your hair, over your lips and between your legs. He was surrounding you in an impossible way. It was soft, but also holding you in your place as if you were still sitting in his lap. He felt solid, but light, it tickled almost. 

One of Tishler’s shocked lieutenants stood in the doorway, frozen at the gruesome scene and you turned your voice to call out over your shoulder. Formally claiming loyalty to Doomfist, you had managed to scare all but those under Tishler’s power into submission and you were sure this would do the trick to turn anyone who was unsure where they stood. His mask pointed to the body then to the cloud of black smoke in the head member’s red chair, you were sure he could see the vague form of your body and the clothes scattered throughout the room.    

“You answer to us now.” There was a smile on your voice. “Tell everyone he’s dead.”

The lieutenant caught his footing as he tried to back away from the door. After another glance to the bloody scene he stood straight at attention and nodded his head.

“Yes, ma’am.” He sounded scared.

 _Good_.  

The door slammed behind you and Gabe formed beneath your body again. His smoke fell to his body, the high of murder and sex no longer at the forefront of his brain before he kissed you one last time before pulling you from his lap. He smoothed out your hair, wiping it away from your face and placed a kiss at the top of your forehead before moving to zip his pants up. As you redressed you stepped around the spray of blood and helped Gabe back into his cloak. He handed you the reflective mask, now splattered with red after a severed vein shot blood across the room. You moved to clean it off, but he stopped you, instead helping you with getting it over your head and a wicked smile spread across his lips.

“Didn’t put you to sleep this time.” He said as he clicked on the latches, he had a hint of smugness that made you blush. “Think you’d make it through a round two once we get back to the room?”

“I’ll let you know once I can feel anything below my neck again.” You laughed, but some part of you genuinely meant it. Your skin felt numb, the tight uniform now on you not helping in any way.

Gabe clicked on his own mask then turned to face Tishler. He moved you to stand next to the body before bringing up a screen, motioning for you to stay quiet and calling out to the whole of the Talon inner council. Many of them answered angrily, some being woken from sleep, others clearly in the middle of a day job, leaders from all over the world popped up around the active call screen and each quickly realized they should shut their mouths as they realized what the image was on their screens. Gabe waited until all of them were silently staring, each Talon leader present to hear the news.   

“So sorry to call you all on such short notice.” Gabe said low beneath his mask. “We would just like to inform you of Cornelius Tishler’s death. Doctor Moira O’Deorain will be replacing him as a council lead effective immediately.”

The call stayed silent, faces of other leaders attempted to remain stoic but many curled in disgust as you stepped away to give the camera a full view of the blood across the table. You studied their reactions, particularly Max who seemed more interested in what you were doing to the side than on the freshly dead body.

“That’s all.” Gabe disconnected the call.

He turned to you in the silent room, rolling his neck to crack it. If there was going to be any fallout from this, you were prepared to meet it so long as you had him at your side. Many of the leaders were already in your pockets, blackmail being used to keep them compliant and quiet as Reaper gained more power within Talon. One person continued to elude you, one bothered you deep to your core and Gabe could feel there was some skepticism coming from you. He crossed his arms, waiting for you to form your thoughts.  

“We need to work on a way to control Max. He didn't react at all to this. He’s the only one we don’t have any dirt on if he tries to disappear. I know he’s hiding something, but I still can’t get into his accounts and the way he acts is just… unnerving. He definitely has someone else running his accounts through extra protection. I'm going to need a lot more than just me if we want to break his code.” You had your arms crossed over your chest, eyes glaring at the useless body gone cold.

“Absolutely not, we're not bringing anyone else into this. Moira knowing what we're doing is already enough of a liability, more people just leaves more opportunities for errors.”

“Then what do you want to do, Gabe? I can't do this alone. The coding itself would set our plan back months and Tishler already wasted too much of our time.”

“There has to be another way. We can’t kill him. There has be something we can do to take him down without causing an uproar with the agents, people will start getting suspicious if the leaders start dropping like flies.”

"Maybe I just need to sleep on it. I'm sure we'll figure something out." You stared at the Reaper mask in bitter silence. Thoughts about ripping apart circuits and wiring from his body passed through your mind. He only cared about money and manipulation. If he knew you were after him he’d just buy his way to another organization to protect himself. Beneath your mask you chewed your lip.

Gabe seemed distracted, staring back at Tishler's corpse before he started searching the body for anything useful. He pulled two phones and a mostly empty wallet. One phone looked like a burner, mostly devoid of any personality and on the last bar of battery, his other phone filled with pictures of him and Arntz many of which you wished you hadn't glanced at. 

“There’s also the matter of Arntz, we should find her before has the chance to find us.” Gabe said scrolling through the recent messages. 

“I have a guess where she is, but I really hope she’s not there.” You shook your head.

“Do you want to send a recon team to check it out?”

“No.” Heart beating in your ears, you knew it had to be you to find out if she was where you thought she was. “I don’t want Talon anywhere near there.”

“Where?”

“Indiana. I think she’s hiding at Jack’s farm.” Saying his name aloud cut like a blade into your heart. Neither of you ever had the chance to even grieve. His death hung like a wool blanket in the air, Gabe shifted on his feet in an uncomfortable shuffle. He curled his hands into tight fists, and anger obvious in his posture that you didn’t expect.

“How soon do you want to leave?”


	10. 10-52, Morrison Farm

“First things first, we’re getting this damn thing out of my neck.”

Clothes bloodied, helmets on, you left that horrific mess of a meeting room hand in hand with Gabe running down the halls towards Moira’s lab. Agents were sprinting past, many turning their heads to glance your direction as you led Reaper through the dimly lit corridors and down through now all too familiar passages. Months you'd spent trying to hack it to turn your voice on, months you spent digging fingernails beneath it trying to pry it from your skin. Now that you had your voice back, you were going to make sure no one else could ever take it away. 

You burst into Moira's lab to find her angrily jotting down notes across long papers. She lifted her face and pushed long hairs falling over her eyes from her forehead as you tore off your helmet and dropped it to the side. She eyed you curiously as you b-lined directly for a chair in the center of her room, usually reserved for experimenting on unsuspecting agents. In the months you were Tishler's silent prisoner, her veins hand grown darker and no longer isolated to just her arm- veins spread from her left eye and the edge of her mouth.

“You’re covered in blood.” She deadpanned at you, almost as a scold.

“I killed that asshole.” You sighed with a hoarse voice as you made yourself comfortable in the chair. “We’ve already told the council you’re taking over his position. Now that he's out of the way we need to focus on controlling the remaining council members, especially Max. Once we have everyone under our control, we can start phase two." 

You were speaking with such _confidence_. Maybe it was the mental high of taking a life so violently or knowing you were surrounded with the only people in your life who you could trust, but with both sets of eyes waiting for you to continue, you could feel the importance of your mission surging through you. Sure, you were taking the messy route to get things done, but you were avenging every last agent who never got the opportunity to fight against Talon, you were bearing the weight of taking down this organization and you had never felt more ready to take on the world.

"So long as it does not interfere with my research, I am willing to help however I can." She rolled from her spot riddled with notes to your side and looked over every inch of dried blood on your skin. "It is nice to see you again, even in this state."  

Gabe placed his mask on the counter next to him, placing himself opposite of Moira at your other side and ran gloved claws carefully through your hair to bring it away from your face and off your neck. 

“I need you to take a look at this, I want it out.” You touched the tiny metal piece in your throat, fingers resting over it before Gabe's hand grazed down your cheek and you turned to kiss the metal talons. 

“I’ll see what I can do.” Moira mumbled as she turned to an array of cabinets, searching for a cloth and bringing it to a tiny sink in the corner of her lab.  

As she prepared a small tray of things she thought she might need, you lifted your head to look into Gabe's eyes. He still looked at you so gently, still looked at you with such absolute love- even after witnessing the horrors you were capable of. Lost in his stare, his hand slid over your jaw and bloodstained metal grazed over your lip. The touch was so small, an insignificant brush of weaponry over your mouth, but the implications of just how much you trusted him with claws that could just as easily tear your face wide open made your heart race.

Moira returned and Gabe dropped his hand to his hip, stepping back as she pressed the wet towel to your throat, carefully wiping away dried blood on your skin. You bit back a smile as you leaned your head heavy against the backrest, stretching your neck long and looking to Gabe with low lids, enjoying the blushing jealousy sweeping across his face at Moira touching you in a way that seemed almost as intimate as how he'd been running his hands over you. Once cleaned, she lifted your chin and held it high in the air as her face leaned close and she pulled at the piece with long tweezers. She hummed disgruntled to herself and searched around on the tray at her side for a handheld scanner.

Each minute her expression grew darker, the room got quieter, and your breathing was starting to catch with fear. She seemed to be exhausting all of the tools at her disposal and your neck was getting rawer by the second. 

“It’s not good news." She finally sighed after what felt like a lifetime with her hands at your throat. "It appears the device has micro-hooks along the edges that embedded into the muscle of your vocal cords after it was injected. Removing it would mean major surgery and likely damage if not completely destroy all the muscle in that area, you wouldn't be able to speak. In my opinion, since it no longer seems to be harming you, it is not worth the risk of attempting to remove it.”

You looked to Gabe, expression falling to devastation. The last thing you wanted was a permanent reminder of Tishler, of what he did to you and how he changed you. It seemed almost more cruel than the months you spent silent to be locked in with this device for the rest of your life.

"There has to be something-" Gabe snarled, but Moira immediately cut him off.

"Do you really think I would suggest this without realizing what it means for her?" She snapped at him before turning to look you in the eyes. "Unfortunately I see no other options. I know it is not the answer you wanted to hear and it is not fair to you after everything you have been through, but it is the reality of the situation. Either this is part of you forever, or we can attempt to remove it with a high likelihood of you never being able to speak or breathe properly again."   

"Fuck." You breathed out as you buried your face in your hands. Moira attempted her best sympathetic look and you stood from the chair with a hard huff. 

They both waited in silence as you paced to the other side of the lab and raked fingers through your hair, breaking apart dried chunks with your nails in anger. It seemed like no one could leave a mark on you without it being permanent. Morrison just had to leave you with scars covering your left arm and your left side. Gabe had to leave bruises only he could see wrapped around your neck. Tishler had to leave his sick version of control hooked into your throat. Moira had to change your genetics to make you stronger and faster when you never even asked for it in the fucking first place. Genji left you with blades that were now almost an extension of your hand. Jesse- you stopped on your heels. 

Neither of them was on the deceased list. What would they think of you now? Jesse would scold you for being a crybaby, for not rolling with the punches. Genji would grimace and look at you with disappointment for even making a big deal about such a tiny piece of metal- at least you still had all your limbs. You sucked in a hard breath, reminding yourself that even though you were left it, you were in control of how you handled it from here. Tishler wasn't there to speak for you anymore. Moira stood and straightened out her stark white lab coat, fiddling with the latches in the front until they were perfectly in place. 

"If it stays, I'm finding a way to manipulate it." You decided as your fingers rested over it. "Gabe and I are heading out to take care of Arntz, I'll mess with it while we're in the air. Contact us immediately if anything happens." 

"Understood." Moira nodded.   

You tucked away the anger you felt bubbling in your stomach. Stored it in your heart to be unleashed towards Arntz as soon as you found her. Mask circled back on, briskly stomping through the halls, you stopped briefly at the engineering to pick up a small bag of things to hopefully rewire the chip with. With his terrifying and now bloodied mask, Gabe was giving orders to Talon lieutenants to hold everything down until you returned either with Arntz in handcuffs or a body bag. Pieces were falling into place and things just felt right for once as you boarded a familiar matte black plane that had been stored away in the back of the Talon airfield for too long.    

Being in the familiar plane again was almost cathartic. The smell of dust and sea salt was still trapped in the compressed air, your plain clothes still laid folded perfectly in the drawers at the back next to an array of repurposed Overwatch weapons. 

"You're positive she's in Indiana?" Gabe asked you as the plane lurched into the sky.

"I'm not, but I can't think of anywhere else she could be after searching for her all this time. Tishler used to go on and on really late into the night about how she always came back after running away, how she always apologized to him in his _favorite way_. Ugh, just thinking about all the shit he told me makes me want to kill him again." You pressed fingers to your temples and rubbed in tiny circles, trying to ease the headache of remembering that wretched man. 

"If she's not there, we'll be back to square one. We have to find her before we move forward with the plan, if she's out there, she's too much of a liability." 

"I know." You sighed, nail picking at dried blood.

"Go get washed off. I'll take a shower after you." He smiled at you and you squirmed in your seat with a sly smile back. 

"You could always join me in the shower, you know-"

"In that tiny thing?" He laughed. "As much as I'd love to, you know I can barely fit in the whole bathroom myself. Besides, I'm sure you're still sore and I don't want to push you." 

 _"Fine."_   You relented and placed a kiss at the top of his head before making your way to the back of the plane. 

In the tiny onboard shower, you watched as blood fell from your skin and swirled down the drain. Years ago, when you scared to even look in Gabe's eyes, even not so long ago when he first brought you onto this plane, if you knew you'd be standing in a pool of someone else's blood washing down your body you would have never believed it. The thought of killing used to scare you, it used to haunt you, but now that you've tasted it, it felt _good_. Killing Tishler with your own hands, not with a proxy or a gun, it made you feel a calm strength like nothing else ever could, and you weren't even scared to admit that you liked it. Part of you wanted to believe it was Gabe's blood in your veins that made you feel this way, but it was more than that, maybe something that always felt like this. If that was the case, then you got the short end of the stick. Homicidal tendencies, but no black eyes that see details, no smoke that can sneak you through door cracks.  

Now you were doubting all of your actions. Why didn't you say something when your team was about to walk into bombs? Was it because you were afraid of authority, or were you morbidly curious? 

No. No, can't think about that. Thinking about Morrison and how horrified he would be in you was the last thing you wanted to care about- so you refused to.  

The shower still had the Overwatch standard issue soap. It smelled like boot camp and laundry and you allowed yourself a moment to just inhale it and remember all the times you'd ignored the scent on base. Guilt hit you. Guilt that you tried to push down by telling yourself you were doing the right thing, that since Overwatch was no longer around, taking Talon down yourself was your only option. Don't cry. You rubbed the soap just a little too hard over the spots where Tishler's blood had stained your skin. You scrubbed at it until your nails were ripping into your skin and you realized you had to stop, that the blood going down was no longer his. You just wanted it off.

Steam poured out behind you as you stepped into the cabin and covered in only a thin towel, dug through the drawers of old clothes left behind. Gabe turned to watch you dress with a biting grin on his face, leaned over his lap watching you hop into an old pair of jeans and a plain black shirt. You grabbed at one of his sweatshirts, the oldest and most faded one stuffed in the back that was riddled with holes at the ends of the sleeves and you drowned yourself in it before returning to the copilot's seat at his side. 

As you were staring out the windshield, eyes looking over fluffy white clouds and bottomless blue of the sky, Gabe stood and ruffled your hair. You kissed his fingers as his hand moved away, watched him with heavy lids until he disappeared into the bathroom at the back of the plane. You were contemplating all the ways your showdown with Arntz could go, all the ways you could take her down, both deadly and not when you thought you heard a low buzzing coming from behind you for an abnormal amount of time. When you finally got curious about what was taking Gabe so long, you turned to look back and he came stepping out with a smile on his face and freshly shaved.

“Very nice.” You stuck your tongue out at him, eying down his now buzzed head and neatly trimmed facial hair.

Gone was the dark beard growing in, curls down to his jaw shaved away. He was back to his military standards, you were sure if he thought he had the authority too he would have made you get a haircut too. A little part of you missed waking up in the mornings to see Jesse's hair shaved down because Gabe was having a bad day, or Genji trying to cover the scars on his skull and complaining about never being able to grow it out long enough to dye. After dressing in his old plain clothes, he sat in the pilot's chair and leaned towards you, your hands fell to the top of his head and felt the fresh trim before falling down to his cheeks and pulling his face towards you. 

"I like it when you get handsy with me." He chuckled as you grabbed his jaw and kept him inches from your face. 

"Let's get a room when we get there." You breathed against his lips, kissing him hard. "First shitty motel we see if we have to, I just want you to fuck me until I pass out and sleep the whole day again." 

"Aren't we on a bit of a time crunch?" He was smiling, knowing you'd want to be with him more. 

"If Arntz has been hiding out in Indiana for months, letting her have one more night won't hurt." 

Gabe grunted against your lips, arms falling to your waist as he dropped from his seat and to his knees at your side. He made you laugh and wiggle against him as he lifted you, hooking your legs around his waist and keeping your weight against him as he stood and carried you across the plane. You were biting your lip holding back aching moans at the dull pain between your legs where you had been stretched past your limits. He pressed your back to the cold metal wall of the ship and kissed hot and heavy at your neck, lips falling over missing bruises and down over sensitive sides.   

"You don't understand how much I've missed you." He groaned with lips on your neck as his body grinded against yours. "There's so many things I've wanted to tell you in person, but now that I have you here it's like I can't think straight. You looked so fucking beautiful like that though, seeing you so calm and focused, you took all my training to heart and you've done so well. If I had you from the start we could have taken Talon down from the very beginning." 

"Save it for the hotel room, Gabe." You sighed as your core circled against his. You knew you couldn't take him again so soon, but riling him up like this was too good to pass up. His kisses were getting sloppier on your neck, lips trailing across skin until he pulled his face away and you saw gentle eyes. 

"Someday, I'm going to tell you how much I love you." He stared at you with a small smile.

Your heart fluttered, beating against your chest echoing his words. Sure 'I love you' had been shared between the two of you, but it was long before you committed to treason and murder. 'I love you' before was always platonic, familiar, and casual. Now the meaning of it had weight. It's not like you didn't know how he felt, it's not like you were unsure of his deep feelings, but hearing it from him almost sent you into a blinding numbness. Your last 'I love you' ended in heartbreak and mourning, and Gabe was careful with his words knowing the impact they would have. 

"Not today?" You finally caught your breath and ran your hand over his shaved head. 

"Not today." He kissed you, kissed your lips until you were smiling and over your cheeks until you were laughing. 

"Well, if I'm not going to get a sweeping romantic speech about how much you love me then I think you should put me down so I can work on the chip in my neck." You tried to sound coy, but he knew he was making you shiver and whine with hands roaming beneath your shirt and teeth nipping at your throat. 

He kissed you one last time as he pressed you to the metal wall, his lips parted with a smile before he carefully let you slip down from his pin and you steadied yourself on your feet. Even as you stood on your own, you couldn't leave his hands holding you at your back and you fell forward against his chest into a tight hug. Your arms held him at his waist, his fingers curled into your hair and you could feel him placing kiss after kiss on the top of your head. He was a gentle giant as he held you away from everything else in the world, all you wanted to do was stay there in his arms, warm and so entirely safe and even though you could breathe for hours now at this point, you truly felt like you could breathe again.   

As he returned to watch the skies, you stood in front of the small fogged mirror of the bathroom. With an array of screwdrivers and tools from your kit you managed to at least get the faceplate of the metal piece off. Beneath the plate was a simple receiver, no longer controlled by a destroyed remote, you tinkered with frequency until it connected to your hacking gloves. With a deep breath, you tested to make sure it worked and managed to cut off your air supply for only a moment before confirming you never wanted to experience that again. Instead, you overrode the basic code of it, instead of cutting off the voice entirely, you played with it until you landed at a voice that was nowhere near your own. Instead of turning it on and cutting off your air, it changed the tone and made you sound almost metallic. 

"Hey, Gabe. Listen to this." You sat yourself next to him and motioned on the voice changer with your gloves. "How does this sound?" 

"Holy shit." He said, hand fumbling with a protein bar wrapper. "You sound just like an omnic." 

"Perfect." You purred, rolling out your speech the same way Max would during Talon council meetings. Gabe grimaced and looked to the metal in your neck with doubtful eyes. "Don't worry, I plan on keeping silent most of the time-" You flipped it back to your normal voice to his relief. "This is is just in case."

* * *

Gabe landed the dropship just outside the city limits of Bloomington in complete darkness after countless hours of flying. In the middle of a field you deemed as abandoned from the military data you were able to access, you exited the plane with bags of your armored uniforms and basics for a few nights stay, dressed as casually as you could. You tucked your hair behind your head and wore your hood up, he brought his old beanie low over his brows. As the sliver of the moon above lit the fields, Gabe darkened his eyes to see any potential threats as you made your way through dead farm fields and out to the main road just a short walk from a motel rated with two and a half stars.      

The lights surrounding the place were dim as you walked through the parking lot, large bugs orbited around the tall lights and you couldn't help but stare at the faded and flickering "VACANCY" sign. It wasn't a great place, not even good, but it was better than the hard cot you'd been strapped to sleep in for the past five months. Anything was better than that. As you approached a rattling of trashcans caught your attention and Gabe immediately went into attack mode with fists forming before you heard him laugh and turn to look at you with his endless eyes.

"Raccoons." He chuckled, pointing to the darkened corner where you watched beady reflective eyes turn your way. 

He leaned down to kiss you on your cheek before you went into the rental office alone and he waited outside, scanning the darkness. A woman who smelled like diapers and cigarettes didn't even offer you a second glance as you paid for a few nights in cash and asked for a room as far away from others as possible. She handed you an old plastic card, you took it between two fingers not wanting to get too much of the grime on your skin as you looked at the old outdated room key and walked with Gabe to the second to last room on the first story. 

Almost everything was decades behind. The technology, the decorations, everything about it screamed the 2020's and it was _hideous_. Gabe helped you unpack your uniform and place it over the beat up table, you worked on running any diagnostics for any unusual activity near Morrison farm. Sick of jeans and sick of oversized clothes you changed into a more familiar nighttime outfit, old running shorts and one of Gabe's shirts from his bag. No longer constricted with armor, with buttons pressing into your stomach or the lining of jeans constricting your movements, you stretched and fell against the bed, cracking an eye to see Gabe waving a dollar at you with a goofy smile.

"I bet they have those old vending machines here." He was tempting you with candy and after months of premixed meals from agents that hated you, your heart leaped at the idea of finding a bag of gummy bears. "If we're quick, we should be okay." 

Down to sweatpants and a skin tight shirt, you held back a giggle as he pulled you from the room and down an outdoor hallway to a stained door that read "VENDING". Inside the ground surrounding the machine was sticky with years worth of spilled soda, and the door closed behind you with a heavy thunk. You shushed Gabe with a finger to your lips and a wink, scolding him for letting the door shut loud enough to wake up everyone in the motel.

"Aw." You sighed in disappointment as you cross your arms in front of you, staring at your reflection in the vending machine glass. "No gummy bears." 

"See anything else you want?" Gabe asked behind you, but you caught his eye in the reflection. 

"Hmm, I see one thing." You let your voice trail off as he caught your eyes and you watched as his lips curled into a smile. 

His body pressed to your back and you caught yourself as you fell forward against the glass with a gasp. Leaving palm prints, you curled your fists as his hand shot between your legs and roughly pushed until they parted. Your knees went weak as you leaned to the machine for support and fingers pressed along your covered slit. With a mouth open and panting you could see your breath hitting hot against the glass and he slipped fingers down the front of your shorts making your body jump. 

"Here? Where just anyone could come in? Tsk-" He faked scolded you, clicking his tongue. "You kill one guy and suddenly you're _so bold."_  

"I-ahhh." Your body was shaking as his fingers pinched at a sensitive clit. "I was actually thinking the room-" 

"I think you want me to take you right here." He sighed and you felt his cock pressing hard to your ass, pinning you to the glass.

His fingers curled down, slipping between sore folds. You were almost embarrassed how wet you already were, just the anticipation of having him again was enough to have him against you in a sudden heat in a place where either of you could get caught and recognized was a level of danger that sent your heart rate spiking. You moaned and let him work you with fingers carefully pushing at your entrance, fingers slicking the inside of your panties as he rocked against you and grew harder. With a lusty laugh you pushed your shoulders back against him unexpectedly, he stumbled back and leaned heavy against the wall and pushed his beanie back on his forehead. 

In his moment of confusion why you shoved him away, you grabbed the edges of his hoodie and pulled him to your height for a long kiss. Just as he was about to say something smart again you trailed down, pushing the bottom of his sweatshirt up and hooking fingers at the front of his sweatpants down just far enough to release him and have his pants rest low on his hips. He let out a hard breath as you grabbed him, wrapping both hands around his length and dropped completely to your knees between his legs. With a smile he brought the fingers previously in your panties to his lips, making a show of sucking in the taste of you while he watched you slowly pump him and bring your tongue to his tip. 

"If I didn't know better, I'd say _you_ were the one who wanted this, Reyes." You teased before kissing a throbbing tip and running your tongue from the base of his cock slowly up.

His breath caught as you sucked what little you could, his hand fell from his mouth to your hair and gripped in to push you with your movements as you slowly opened your jaw wider and wider to take him. He rolled his neck and bucked his hips, impressed you were taking him more than you had before. 

"Do you know how many times I thought of you like this?" He sighed as you moaned around him. "Would have loved to have you like this in my office. Thought about you doing this so goddamn much when you'd sleep on my lap- fuck. Fuck, I know it was bad and I should have never thought anything like that but you're just so fucking pretty, you know that?" 

You smiled and pulled off him with a long breath, your mouth filling with the taste of his skin and your jaw aching. His fingers trailed from your hair to your lips and he pushed beneath your chin so you were looking up at him. 

"What else did you think about?" You asked between deep pants. 

"Taking you in my office, I can't even begin to tell you how much I thought of that." He snapped against your thigh and you felt him curve against you. 

He groaned and crouched to lift you by your waist bringing you to your feet. With a gasp leaving you, he slammed you against the door and pulled your shorts to your thighs. His fingers returned to check that you were ready, starting with two that pushed against swelling walls, then another added to stretch you as he growled and rocked his cock against the back of your thighs. You gripped onto the door handle as he held nothing back ramming fingers until you were shaking and clawing into the door. He wanted you on his level and he wanted you begging for him. 

"On nights when you'd come to my room after nightmares, and you'd fall asleep on the couch, oh-" He rutted hard on your thigh, pushing between them and rocking. "Sometimes you'd be crying and I'd think of kissing your tears away. You'd have your head in my lap and I'd wonder what kind of noises you'd made. I'd think of you coming into bed with me, waking me up with that pretty little mouth of yours. I'd think of you begging for me to take you, but I'd never betray my friend like that and I'd deny you. You would just lay there next to me-" He groaned, curling in on himself as he fucked between your legs. "You would lay there and touch yourself and tell me all the things you wish I was doing to you."      

"Please, Gabe-" You whined before he curled against a bundle of nerves and left you whining. 

 _"Please?"_   He growled outside of your ear before kissing your sweat-soaked neck. "Tell me _exactly_ what you want from me." 

As your body rocked against the door, beneath your hand the door handle jiggled and you sucked in a breath turning to look back at Gabe who had a devilish smile. He slammed his hand over the frame, curling fingers against it as a hard stop if anyone were to try and push it open. As you were distracted watching him lean on his weight on the frame, he took his opportunity to slide into you with a deep groan. Something about being swollen and sore from the morning with him, and embarrassingly wet from him riling you up in such a public place was both pushing you past comfortable limits and lighting every single nerve in your body. The first push was fast, in you again and throbbing against needy walls. 

"What the damn hell?" Outside the door a thick-accented voice slurred out. "Why's this shit always gots happen when I jus' wan' some ice?" 

Uncaring if you were heard by the drunken on the other side, he drove into you hard enough to make you squeal out a loud moan and slap a hand over your mouth. He filled you to a point where you lost your breath, where you couldn't see straight or see the lights flicking above with his hard thrusts. He didn't bother to try to hide what he was doing to you. Even to strangers, he was proving who you were with, he was claiming your body as his and his alone and that animalistic protection of you only made your blood run warmer. Something about the way he was handling you, about his teeth hitting your skin between hard kisses to your shoulders, it lit a fire in you that reminded you not only was he a super soldier, but you had his strength running through you- and you wanted to give him a jolting reminder of that.     

"Harder." You demanded under your breath. He paused to grip his hands into your hair and pull your head back so you were looking at him.

"Couldn't quite hear you." He breathed against your lips, not letting you kiss him.

"I said _harder_ , Reyes. How many times do I have to ask you before you give you me what I want?" There was a sparkle in your eye as you saw his reaction. 

His body left yours, letting your legs fall weak to the floor before he grabbed at your hips and turned you around, crushing you against the glass of the vending machine. Your shorts fell down your legs, around your ankles then stayed on the floor with slip-on sandals, as your shoulders made rough contact the glass behind them cracked and you reached up to grab onto the top with all your strength as he spread your thighs and pushed himself back in. Everything inside you swelled as he went deeper, you could feel him rubbing you raw inside but you couldn't care less about the pain, all you wanted was more of him, you wanted everything he was willing to give you.  

"You're too tight. Isn't this hurting?" He panted as he bounced you against the vending machine. 

"Keep going." You gasped with each thrust, head bobbling above your body in a blissed out state. 

He kissed again at your neck, fingers pulling hard at your nipples and pressing over bruised skin he'd caused by holding you before. You could feel him twitching in you, pulsing deep each time he bottomed out and made you see white. With each thrust you heard glass cracking further, your fingers curled tighter to keep yourself in place. Faster and deeper he drove into you again and again leaving you no time and no room to think about stupid it was to do this here but that didn't stop him from biting down on the soft spot of your neck and moaning from deep in his chest as he spilled without warning. You shook out a sigh feeling how much further he pushed your limits, his cum following him out and messing your thighs. As he brought you away from the glass it shattered with one loud crack and rained down over the candy inside and around your feet.

Still, in your own high having not yet been over the edge, the sound of shattering glass briefly made your heart jump to your throat with a panic you hadn't experienced in a long time and you scrambled away from it with a high pitched scream before you slapped a hand over your mouth and realized you'd stepped barefoot over broken glass. Gabe, almost in as much shock as you were, looked between you and the broken vending machine before quickly shaking the glass from your shorts. He held your hips as he quickly brought the shorts over you, trying to steady your shaking legs before he picked you up and cradled you in his arms with your sandals dangling from his fingers.   

"So, did you want any candy?" He asked breathlessly.

"Gummy _worms_ will do." You said as you tried not to move your feet.

He bent down enough for you to reach in a grab a bag, tossing it over your stomach before carefully opening the vending room door and hurrying as fast as he could to the motel room. As he carried you back, your arms held tight around his neck, your stomach clenched with an orgasm unintentionally denied. By the time you made it back to the room, both of you were giggling with nervousness realizing just exactly what you'd done. He sat you down on the edge of the bed, dropping to his knee in front of you and handling your leg with care as he lifted it to look at the bottom of your foot. 

"Well, it's not that bad. You'll probably have some pain for a day or two, but nothing major." He leaned forward and kissed the ends of your toes before opening your kit and using tweezers to pull out little shards.  

"Thanks, Doctor Reyes." You teased as you fell back against the bed and he gripped your ankle to keep you still. 

Your body twitched with a needed release. Just a little more, just _something_ , and you were sure you'd be able to cum but the pain of glass in your feet and Gabe's attention to making sure you weren't in pain was bringing you down. He eyed the way you were shaking, saw you curling fingers over the fabric on your stomach and he paused to watch you wriggle your hips in the air. With a gruff sigh, he scooted forward, pulling your ruined shorts back down over legs and hooked your knees over his shoulders. He smiled against you as your body rippled with pleasure feeling him press a warm tongue to your core. He was slow and gentle but flicked over your clit in ways that made you wish he still had long hair so you could pull at it. Instead, you opted for riding against his goatee and raking nails across his skull until you were moaning into your arm thrown over your face and whimpered for him as your thighs twitched with release. 

He kissed along your hips, down your inner thigh and to your knees before returning to continue his work at the soles of your feet. You laid with jelly limbs and a happy buzzing mind as he took care of you and kissed along bruises from an unfair fight and rough sex. 

* * *

He let you sleep in that morning. 

Maybe it would have been better if you'd just slept through that whole day, or even that whole trip.  

It was late afternoon when you rolled over in a bed too small to share with a super soldier, your arms reached out for him but he was already gone. As your eyes opened he came into view, sitting with his combat gear on in a shitty motel chair, meticulously cleaning off Tishler's blood from your mask and armor. Your whole body ached. Insides were sore, arms twitching with pain from overuse, your throat hurt, your feet felt like they were going to just outright fall off. With a deep groan you pushed yourself to sit up, he looked to you through the side of his eyes and smiled. 

"How are you feeling?" His voice was tired. 

"Like I was hit with a truck." You laughed as you fell back against the pillows. "But, good. It's nice to wake up to your ugly mug." 

"Right back at you." He placed the reflective mask on the table and gently pulled the blankets away to check your feet. "See, already almost healed. Super soldier blood isn't so bad, is it?" 

"I can't even _imagine_ what I'd been feeling right now without it." Honestly, you didn't even want to know. 

You rolled up, slowly cracking your spine as you stretched and rotated sore shoulders. You'd need to force yourself out of bed, knowing you were going back to a place that only held precious memories to you was one thing, but expecting to find someone who you were either going to beat up or beat to death there peaked your anxiety levels at even the thought. 

"Alright, enough rest. If you don't get up now, I'll make you run ten laps around the property." He held out his hands to lift you which you graciously took but groaned the whole time he stood you up. 

When you readied for the day, when you put on that reflective mask and those hacking gloves, you didn't know what to expect- but you also didn't know what not to expect and that's what scared you. Gabe could feel your nerves, trying to comfort you with little touches through the day as you double checked all your weapons and codes. As soon as the sun sank behind low mountains you were moving out with him across the parking lot in the dark finding the most inconspicuous car to hack into. He patiently waited as you overrode one of their systems and made it untraceable. He sat in the passenger seat as you entered in the coordinates for Morrison Farm, a farm you never thought you'd be returning to without a Morrison in tow. 

As you got closer, you turned off the lights and parked just up the road so you wouldn't be detected by Arntz. That was the tricky part, avoiding her- back on the strike team, she was the stealth expert. She knows how to hide and is damn good at doing it. If she was here, she may even be able to fool you. Before crossing the fence you scanned for any motion detectors. Finding none, you sent Gabe in first. He curled across the dirt in black smoke, snaking his way to the side of the house as you stayed low in dead corn stalks. Most of the lights were off, save for one in the loft above the main room and one in the bedroom at the back of the house. There was movement up top, something fast and moving with purpose. As soon as you were close enough, you clicked on heat sensors in your mask and scanned the house. 

To your surprise, you found Arntz in the loft upstairs already in the process of fighting someone. 

"What the fuck?" You whispered into your earpiece. "Gabe did you tell anyone we thought she was here?"

"Why would I do something like that?" He growled back at you annoyed. 

"Somone is _fighting_ her, it looks like it could be one of our soldiers. Do you have an opening to get in?" 

"Working on it." 

He went silent with a hint of static that told you he'd fallen into his smoke form. You kept your eyes on the fight happening above in the loft, punches being thrown and missed and blocked shots seemingly too soft for a real fight. The more you stared at it, the more something seemed _off_. 

"Made it in, heading upstairs." His voice was deep in your ear but you were stuck on the way the fight was moving.

The man held her arms behind her back, she struggled before she broke the grab and shoved him away seemingly turning to point and yell at him. All you wanted to do was hear what Arntz was shouting, you could only hear her muffled from this far away. Something wasn't right. You grabbed Genji's blades from your pocket and readied them as you crouched towards the house. It was a gut feeling that something wasn't right, a sick twisting that you were ignoring because you didn't want to believe it could be true. Through the heat-seeking filters in your helmet you could see speckles of Gabe moving as his smoke form, coming to an abrupt stop at the top of the stairs. Suddenly his form materialized in the kitchen, leaning heavily against the oven. He stayed completely silent.        

"What's going on in there Gabe?" Your voice was becoming more panicked the closer you ran towards the house. 

"Do not come in here." He snapped. "I repeat, do not enter this house." 

"What the _fuck_ is going on?" You hissed as you made your way up the porch and looked in past thin white curtains, clicking off your heat seeking on the helmet. Inside Gabe stood in the kitchen, head lifted looking up to a loft as a fist curled over his chest. Above, you could see Arntz wildly waving her arms and having an animated argument. You let out a shaky breath. "Engage Arntz, Gabriel. Or I will."   

His shoulders dropped and he shook his head before bursting into black smoke and snaking up the stairs. You moved across the windows trying to find a better viewpoint in, only able to see the obscured forms of bodies in the loft above moving in the light as shadows. In your headpiece, you heard the sounds of Gabe grunting with punches being thrown and someone being tossed across the room. Your palms were sweating against your gloves. Forehead beading against your mask. The only thing louder than your heartbeat in your ears was Gabe's groaning as someone threw him against the railing above the front room. 

You were done watching. You were getting in there. As much as it broke your heart to destroy a home you only loved, you flipped on your voice modulator and backed up across the porch to run full speed at the front window. Gabe came crashing down from the second story, hitting his back hard on the dining room table you had breakfast with Morrison at a lifetime ago. You jumped up on the balls of your feet, mentally psyching yourself up for the inevitable noise you thought you'd put behind you. Above, Arntz stood overlooking Reaper and readying to jump down as you shattered through the window and jumped over him.   

A loud scream came from above before Arntz dropped down and tried to tackle you. As she came at you there was an opportunity to send her stumbling to the ground, you grabbed her arm and circled her over your shoulder sending her to the floor on her back which made her cry out in pain. As you punched towards her with Genji's blades drawn and ready for her throat too, the ground shook with a heavy thud and someone grabbed your wrist. You snapped to them ready to throw a punch an immediately lost all your fight. 

"Get out of my house." He snarled at you before slamming an elbow into the side of your mask sending you reeling across the hallway, down towards a bedroom you used to sleep in. 

This was a trick. Arntz was tricking you somehow. This man. This _phantom_. He looked and sounded just like Jack Morrison. 

His hair was lighter, his skin lighter, almost as if everything about him was just a little ashier. His face and arms were riddled with deep scars that scared you, they were the scars of a dead man.  

In your moment of complete confusion you stumbled backward, Gabe pushed himself from the floor and lunged at Morrison grabbing his legs and bringing him to the floor. As they threw fists at each other, Arntz flew towards you, finally finding her footing and running you into the back of the house, into the bedroom with all the furniture you'd built with Morrison and suddenly you weren't feeling quite as confident as you were after killing Tishler. 

Tishler. 

That's how you would throw her off, too. You'd tell her _exactly_ what you did to her lover. 

As she came barreling your way, you stepped to the side and twirled a blade over one of your fingers. 

"He's dead, Arntz." You growled. She grabbed your wrist which in turn you sharply jabbed the blade through her forearm. As she let out groans of hot pain you got right next to her ear, speaking low in your robotic voice. "Cornelious is dead and I fucking killed him. He was so weak he couldn’t even fight back and he died knowing how pathetic he was."   

“Shut up!” She screamed, pushing you hard at your shoulders sending you crashing against a wall covered in old floral wallpaper. As you were separated, she stared down at the gaping wound in her arm, shaking as blood covered the wood below. 

"He had me locked up for five months like some kind of animal as he tried to hunt you down and you were here the whole time?" You screamed at her. "And with _Jack Morrison?"_ Even through the modulator, she could hear your voice cracking. "He's supposed to be dead!" 

She looked to you with burning eyes, an expression that washed over her of understanding. You were both breathing hard in the silence. She was gripping tight at the wound on her arm and you were shaking from pure adrenaline. 

"There's a lot of people that are supposed to be dead in this house, I think."

She released her arm and reached for something at her back. You ducked just fast enough for her to miss a shot with a bright blue revolver, her and Tishler's names were engraved across the chamber along with twisting lines forming a heart in the center. The bullet flew over your head and hit a small frame where Morrison had framed a page of sheet music. You rolled around her, sprinting out the bedroom door and down the hall only to be met with Gabe trying to hold Jack down and struggling to do so. You came to a skidding halt as Jack freed himself from Gabe's grab and came running towards you with fists curled ready to make contact. 

Behind you, Arntz slid into the hallway and aimed directly at your head. You dropped, again, not realizing where the bullet would hit.

This shot was deafening. As you avoided the bullet, your heart sank to the floor. It was too late to change your mind, you weren't fast enough to take back how quickly you dropped. As you fell to the floor a bullet made contact with the center of Morrison's chest and knocked him back to the floor. You stumbled next to Gabe who was breathing hard and holding his stomach with a curled fist. You both watched as Morrison fell heavy at your feet, and Arntz stood with a dumbfounded look on her face, eyes focusing on the gun in her hand. 

At your side, Gabe growled something that sounded almost demonic. He fell to smoke and darted towards Arntz who tried to drop the gun and run back to the bedroom. She was able to get out of your sight, but not out of Gabe's grasp. From the bedroom, all you heard was a terrified scream, and the all too familiar sound of a neck breaking before the house fell to silence. 

You fell to your knees next to Jack, pushing shaking hands on the wound at his chest as tears pushed from your eyes and fell against the inside of your mask. 

"I don't understand." You sobbed but it came out garbled and robotic. His eyes were wide and searching across the reflection of the mask. He looked so tired. He looked so _old_. 

It hurt. It hurt in your chest like you were the one who had been shot. He was supposed to be dead and this was supposed to be easy and you were supposed to be able to move on. 

You were muttering curses under your breath, desperately trying to apologize for something you never could have seen coming.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry- I’m so sorry, Jack. You weren’t supposed to be here. I never wanted you to get hurt.”

“We need to go, now.” Gabe groaned behind you as he gripped his claws into your shoulder. 

Your hands shook as you pressed into the wound on Morrison. You knew what leaving him here like this meant. They’d find him. The neighbors, EMTs, the town, everyone would know he was alive. 

"Someone's coming." Gabe said with more urgency this time. You turned to look out the window, in the moonight you saw the neighboring farmer and the omnic you saw with him when you were here last were sprinting over the fence with modified shotguns in hand. "We have to go."

He had to physically rip you away from Morrison who was still looking at you with such a bewildered expression. You looked at him laying there one last time before you turned to run with Gabe back towards a stolen car and as far from this messy scene as you could get. 

You wished you had just slept the whole day, but that night, you wished you hadn't slept at all. 

Love is a fucked up thing.

You can still love someone and know they’re the worst possible thing for you. Love can leave you sobbing in the cot of a small plane on the way back to Italy as you realize there’s still heartache from seeing a former flame looked to you with such confusion and hatred. Love made your head hurt and your heart sink, love held you during the night until you slept against a steady falling chest.

Love however, could not prevent you from slipping into a vivid dream as you tried to forget the evenings events flying back to the base you were claiming as a home. Gabe had you in his lap, curled together in silent solidarity. A dream of smoke and fire, of confusing shadows and whispering voices. That night your mind bursted with the memories of dreams, pent up feelings and wishes all smashing together in your own personal horror show making you sweat cold against Gabe’s chest and beg for forgiveness under your breath. As your fingers gripped hard into his shirt, he tried to wake you, but once sleep dug its claws into you there was no coming back.

That was the night your dreams came back, and they were far worse than anything they had been before.  

 

 


	11. Identity Crisis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do your job, or someone will force you to.

You avoided it for a while, the blue-eyed blonde-haired heavily scarred elephant in the room. 

Alone with Gabe you held your breath, too afraid of admitting how much it hurt your heart to see the ghost of Morrison. Gabe would lay in the bed next to you, surrounded with darkness and starlight spilling in through an open window, your hand in his as your skin would prickle from the cold air. You'd hear him open his mouth to ask something, then the long push of a breath knowing things would probably be better left unsaid.

For a while, he let you process. He watched your reactions to his words carefully, he held his tongue and waited for you to be ready, until you were standing over the sink in the bathroom with elbows to the counter, hands pressing freezing water to your face in the early hours of the morning. He came up behind you, loving fingers trailing across the small of your back before he leaned his forehead against your shoulder and let out a sigh. You felt like you'd been awake for days, your eyes were burning, everything felt heavy, it was a terrible sensation of being completely numb and unnervingly alert at the same time.  

"What are we supposed to do now, Gabe?" You shook as you spoke, wiping cold droplets from your cheeks. "What the _fuck_ do we do now?"  

"We have to continue with the plan, Jack being alive is a shock but it's also a distraction. We can't put off what we're doing just because that boy scout managed to make it out of an explosion." He kissed at the skin on your shoulder and it made your curl in on yourself. Every once of confidence, every block of power you'd built up in yourself had been kicked full force from your stomach the moment you laid eyes on the scars across Morrison's face. "This is hurting me just as much as it's hurting you." He whispered, a hand resting at your waist. "We have to keep it together."  

"I don't understand how..." Your voice trailed off as you collapsed into Gabe's arms. There were so many things you didn't understand. 

"I know it's unfair of me to ask you this-" He spoke against the top of your head, lips over your hair and your heart beat in your throat at just the anticipation of his question. "Do you still lo-" 

"Don't." You warned.

On top of all the things you didn't understand, the last thing you needed to feel was conflict or regret about turning your back on Morrison. Confusion about feelings that now felt like they weren't even yours was enough to make you want to gag. Gabe ran his fingers through your hair and hugged you close. You tried so hard not to cry, you were running a terrorist organization for god's sake you shouldn't have been crying, but everything was overwhelming and you hadn't slept properly in days. Every fiber in your body wanted to run back to Morrison farms just to see him again, just to really make sure what you saw was real. 

Moira could offer no explanation for Morrison's living state but she seemed determined to find out. She was convinced it had something to do with the super soldier serum, almost in awe she'd pace around her lab and mumble about how Gabe technically should also be dead each time his body completely degenerates. When she'd talk about it you could see glimmers of obsession in her mismatched eyes, you could hear the determination in her voice. While you were avoiding sleep and spending morning in her lab she started drawing your blood again, running it through test after test compared to Gabe's with results that never seemed to make much sense. 

"Immortality is an impossibility." She'd snarl each time Gabe snapped some comment off about Morrison surviving. 

"Don't look at me like that." Gabe would ask in shame whenever you walked in on them testing enhancements to his _condition_.   

"I don't know if I can do this." You'd whisper to yourself behind a reflective mask whenever you thought about how far you were from the girl who just wanted to serve under a bright-eyed commander and was thrown into a minefield. 

Seeing Morrison put your mind in a haze, a dark smokey haze that reeked of campfire. While you were checked out, months of monotonous work went by.

Moira took to Tishler's role easily. She began running the medical division as if she was a natural, but this now meant she was busier than ever. You felt numb as you sat in Moira's chair at the center of her lab night after night avoiding your nightmares. Sometimes you wondered if she ever slept- those days you wondered if you ever slept either. When your dreams came back they hit you hard, they tortured you with happy memories of a past you couldn't return to, they reminded you of every wrong turn you made to bring you to this point, they meshed together all the worst parts and it made you hopelessly delirious as you started avoiding sleeping because of it.

Not having dreams was so much better than not being able to escape them. 

At ungodly hours in Moira's lab, you'd curl up in her chair and wordlessly watch her do her work. Sometimes she'd cover you in a lab coat and try to convince you to sleep, others Gabe would join you and list off all the things left to do before the plan to destroy Talon could move forward. Pressure was building on you, weighing you down heavy to the floor with stones on your shoulders and chest threatening to crush you if you didn't do _something_. Everything was waiting on you. In order to move forward, you needed to cross a line that you never thought you'd have to. It was denial that kept you walking, you liked it most when you could just shut down and not really think, instead listening to the chittering of bunnies in cages locked up waiting for another experimental injection. 

The next part of the plan would take practice. You couldn't come out with blazing blades to throats that deserved them, no the easy part was over, now it was up to you to throttle the final hold of control. After hours of watching Moira, when it was late enough, when you'd taken long enough to build up your courage, you'd wander into the medical holding cells down the hall. 

"You can do this." Your hands would shake as you psyched yourself up beneath your breath, hot air hitting the back of a reflective mask.

Most of the rooms sat empty now. Here, Tishler tortured people because he could, he experimented on innocent people. Moira over the release of most of them, Talon orchestrated payments and threats to keep those who were mentally able to quiet, and anyone that did make a fuss, you had to turn a blind eye as Moira reprogramed them to forget their horrors. You watched her do it, once. Reprogramming seemed so simple, but it twisted your stomach. A Talon agent who threatened to go to the UN, one who had nothing left to lose, they begged her not to and cried as she tried to shush them and strapped their wrists to a metal chair. Gabe watched your reaction instead of the procedure itself, he knew all too well that you found nothing satisfying about having to use reprogramming as the last resort to your problems but he found it curious that death bothered you less than erasing a mind.

Perhaps that's what made the plan even worse for you. After five months of listening to him talk about his experiments as if they were a game, you told yourself you were better than Tishler, better than what he was doing because you were doing it for a _noble_ cause, but late at night each time you'd wander to the furthest holding cells by yourself and pull on your hacking gloves to reprogram 'trouble' omnics you knew you weren't that different than him. You didn't want to think about that. 

"They're just omnics." You'd sigh into your hand trying not to lose control of your emotions. 

When you couldn't sleep, propped up in bed in the middle of the night you'd research everything you could about what you were doing. Gabe's hand would twitch in his sleep against your thigh, you'd turn your back hoping to block the light from your screen to not wake him. 

Officially, on the United Nations list of war crimes committed during the first omnic war, what you were doing was called Hacked Unwilling Modification of Omnic Nature, or HUMON for short. Most people just called it circuitwashing. The simple omnics were easy, robots built for one or two tasks, ones with no personality or thoughts of the greater world outside of their duties. Hacking them was the same as hacking a keypad or a toy. Then there were the complex ones, individuals with actual names instead of assigned numbers, they chose their own clothes, they had jobs that humans, they had emotions and thoughts and all they wanted to do was live a normal life. Those were the ones you struggled with- how were you supposed to hack free will, or hopes and fears? Just like with humans, it was tricky and took a few tries to get it right. 

You didn't like to talk about your failed reprogramming experiments. The ones whose light's faded after pleas to let them go. You wouldn't talk to Moira about it, you wouldn't take to Gabe about it, instead, you left robotic bodies behind and black grease stains on your clothes and tried to tell yourself it was okay because they were _bad_ and you were _good_ and you were doing this because you were _right._  It was okay because you needed to make sure you knew exactly what you were doing when you confronted the final step of this phase: Maximilien. Unfortunately for Max, he wasn’t a human that you could hand off to Moira and forget.

Since nothing else could get to him, you were going to hack into Max and you were going to control him in every possible way. Searches for blackmail, threats, anything to hang over his head, it all turned up empty until you were left with the final conclusion that the only way to take everything from him while still being completely in control of everything he had, was to completely override him. If you couldn’t get to his money or his power, you’d have to settle for _him_. You tried to go other routes, tried with everything you could to find some other way to force Max to your side. His accounts were locked behind walls you could never break through. His hold over Talon's money and properties firmer than any formal military. You'd have to extract the information from him you needed, but you also needed it to appear as if he was still running things- raising suspicions now would only ruin the plans.

He was smart with his money, smart with his secrets and smart with his inner circle. He trusted very few and guarded himself well. Whenever he had a few moments to speak to you it always seemed like he thinly veiled personal questions prying into your life as offers to work for him as a personal hacker. He was open with his invitation to join him, even offering once in a conversation where Gabe was standing to the side seething beneath his Reaper mask, but it would take far too long to gain the kind of trust you needed. 

* * *

Cracking knuckles beneath your gloves you were mentally running through all steps it would take and how long you'd be working with circuits when you got a frantic call to meet Gabe at the docking bay- finally after months of tracking everyone down, agents previously in the field under Tishler's orders were returning, some had even been in the field since Antonio had been running a branch. Now with all the Talon agents returning to base, Gabe reorganized their structure. The reorganization was methodical, strictly set out to what would worsen the relationships between agents the most. Part of taking down such a massive infrastructure started with making sure no agent felt like they had job security or that they were surrounded by people they could consider a family. 

The air felt different after the restructure of agents. There was a tense way between their interactions that had you and Gabe smirking with satisfaction. Infighting was at an all-time high, trust between them was strained at best. Fear of retaliation, fear of Reaper and what he would do if anyone spoke out of turn kept them quiet. He'd watch them and note how different agents interacted with each other in the mornings. He seemed to be getting tenser too. Everyone seemed rigid as you made your way through the docking bay, agents held their shoulders square and spoke in unenthused quick bursts. Comradery seemed to be a thing of the past, replaced with anger and distrust.

Normally Gabe ran these alone, noting every agent who came through and marking any particular ones that seemed like they would be easy to manipulate. When you got his call, you were hitting the ground running before you could even finish your thoughts, there would be only one reason he'd want you to come meet him while he was working with agents- he found someone. 

 _"Holy shit."_   Shocked words fell from your lips without the voice modulator on as you slowed your pace to stand at Gabe's side. 

There was a group of four agents all gathered in a circle turning in their field weapons and removing armor. You watched in curious horror as they moved and spoke like humans, but all maintained the same emotionless expression and disturbingly unsettling blue skin. Amélie stood tall above the others, her eyes wandered around the base as if she was scanning for threats and hair longer than you'd ever seen it falling down her back. In the months Tishler had you voiceless he tormented you with stories about Amélie's reprogramming, how she was a 'perfect subject' for one of his sleeper agent experiments. He made sure to go over every excruciating detail about how she screamed for days as they moved around the functions of her mind. After she killed her husband and returned to Talon, he bragged about how quiet she became, how quiet he made her after injecting her with his own version of Moira's nerve blockers to prevent her from feeling, he complimented himself on the tone of her skin transitioning into something more out of a science fiction novel than real life. He'd told you what he did to her with the help of Moira's serums, but you weren't prepared to see it. 

"I need to stay to oversee the remaining agents returning, I want you to take her to Moira immediately." Gabe said low beneath his mask. 

"Yes, sir." With a flip of your voice modulator and a friendly wave to the team of reprogrammed agents, you pointed to Amélie who had no reaction to your approach. "Widowmaker, we need to run some additional tests before we can clear you back to fieldwork, come with me please." 

She didn't respond, instead she wordlessly followed you through the docking bay. Behind your mask you nervously glanced to Gabe who was tapping his foot and drumming clawed fingers against his arm watching you leave with her. The chances of Moira being able to reverse something like this, especially after all this time, it seemed almost impossible- but you had to try. Widowmaker followed you just like a good soldier, silent in her obedience and unfaltering in being just a few steps behind you all the way until you reached the medical wing, at the doors leading in she abruptly stopped moving and shifted her weight on her feet. You turned to look at her, raising a brow she couldn't see behind the mask. There was something behind her blank expression, some sort of fear in her eyes that made your skin crawl. 

"Please come with me, I promise we are not going to harm you." 

"I-" She seemed taken aback that she was even speaking, a loose fist fell above her chest resting over her heart. "I don't want to go in there." 

"It's okay, I know you don't." After everything you listened to Tishler did, after you knew what it took to preprogram someone, you wouldn't either if you were in her position. "You're safe. The man who was here last time, I killed him. We're trying to help you." 

"Help me?" Her accent thickened and for a brief moment you almost saw the Amélie you knew before. 

"I don't want to force you." With a flick of your voice modulator you dropped your omnic tone. "I want you to remember who you are, I want you to be able to feel again. Please Amélie, trust me." 

"Amélie." She whispered as if she was trying to chase a memory. "Do not call me that." 

You reeled back, caught off guard by her sudden sharpness. She dropped her shoulders and it almost looked like she was readying to fight you. 

"You remember your name?" 

"Of course." The way she spoke was almost as if she was spitting on you. "I know exactly who I am and I know I am not going in there with you. Whatever _additional tests_ you needed to run can be proven at the practice range, I am perfectly capable of performing the duties I have been made for." 

With that she turned on her heel, her long hair whipping around followed with a glare to you over her shoulder. Your heart felt like it was jumping around in your chest, a mess of beats that didn't know if they wanted to be slow or fast or stop altogether. You were left in a cloud of confusion and denial and in a moment of frustration, you watched her disappear back down the hall and around a corner because you even attempted to move your feet again. 

Gabe was pissed off when you told him she walked away, he didn't understand the way she looked at you or the bitterness in her words. Instead, he took matters into his own hands. Anytime he watched Amélie at the shooting range, or across the room during hand to hand combat practice, you could feel just how badly he wanted to just take off his mask and shake her. You could feel how angry he was that she was unremorseful of killing his comrade, that she was working for an enemy he was trying to take down. He wanted Amélie to admit to what she'd done. He assigned her to his personal strike team, vowing to keep her safe and change her mind back. 

With the reintroduction of one Lacroix, and the enhancements Moira was making to his body so he could strengthen himself while in a smoke form, you were left to the sidelines to watch as he grew all the more powerful. When you were avoiding sleep you'd hear Gabe mumbling in his night terrors. Mostly you'd hear the usual, low threats, dark laughing, your name, but once Amélie appeared back in his life you were hearing Gérard's name and cries to bring him back. In the mornings you'd ask him how he slept and what he dreamt, and even though you knew better, he always tried to hide it. 

"Sunny mornings with you." Were always his answer, even when you were sure his mind had conjured up far more horrific things. 

As you perfected your craft, not long after Amélie returned, a riot started between the newly structured strike teams. You were making your way to Max's office, shaking with the anticipation of dragging him down to the medical wing. You were ready to finally get it over with when agents who had their roles changed around, those who flipped ranks or lost privileges, threw real fists during a morning practice session. What started out as an isolated fight quickly grew to something beyond control, lieutenants and runts alike were in the mix, the noise from hundreds of people fighting at once boomed through the entire base and must have woken up all of Italy as shouts carried through the stone courtyard, over the base and into a cloudy sky.  

By the time you made it there those who stayed out of the fight had locked themselves away in hiding places waiting for the chaos to be over. You burst into the massive courtyard catching a glimpse of Gabe in his Reaper garb looming over the sight at a window high above, his arms were crossed and he seemed so pleased with himself making no effort to stop agents from almost killing each other. With a sharp breath, you had to think quick and assess the seriousness of a riot between agents who all knew hand to hand combat. At the very least you were thankful the riot at least started during morning practice and not at the shooting range, at morning practice you were one of the few people with a weapon and within seconds of taking in the sight of agents pounding each other's faces into bricks you were firing warning shots.   

Three warning shots and the courtyard quieted down.

One warning shot above the skull of an agent who tried to turn the blame on you.

One shot to the forehead of another who agreed. 

An unsettling silence overtook the courtyard. Behind your mask you were scowling, having to deal with this instead of Max was just another bump in the road you wanted to get past and the form of Reaper watching your every move from the high window was the moment only an annoyance. You looked around to faces you'd studied in agent files. So many of the people who stood before you were part of Talon because of desperation, people with skills not applicable to anything outside of mercenary work. People who had to claw their way from the slums, people with guns in their hands from childhood, people who watched a world fall into war and took full advantage of it, people with absolutely nowhere else to go but a terrorist organization that paid their bills. Not everyone was a bad person, you knew that, but you couldn't face the question of who had a good moral compass when you were proving a point to a crowd beating each other to death. 

"Everybody return to their service stations immediately." You shouted with an amplified omnic voice. "Since no one here seems to understand how to deal with each other like adults, all missions are on hold until further notice. No weapons will be distributed and all agents will have their permission levels reverted to one." There was a low groan among the large crowd. "Complaints will be heard on a shoot first ask questions later basis." 

Shit like this wouldn't happen in Overwatch. This, riots and glares from agents who were just trying to survive, it felt more like running a prison than a military. Gabe's plan to create infighting worked a little too well. He thought it would take months for fights to break out, to see people turn on each other, but within weeks agents were getting fed up with the way things were being run and dropping from Talon. Things were moving fast and you had to keep up, you knew you did, but you were almost deathly afraid to. 

* * *

On a foggy fall morning you wandered down to Moira's lab. The skies outside were shrouded in a dark gray, sunlight blocked from reaching the choppy ocean pounding against the side of Talon headquarters.  Even Moira's usually vivid orange hair looked dull in the flickering fluorescent blubs as she cracked open the window and offered you a cup of overpowering black coffee. 

"You can't avoid sleeping." She warned you, bringing the mug to her lips when you refused to take it. 

Your gaze dropped, fingertips grazing over old scars on your arm. As worried as Moira was about you, her appearance was also growing seeds of concern in your stomach. Her hand was getting darker and losing muscle mass, veins sprouting from corners of a blue eye slowly overtaking the entire area under her lid. As she pushed her hair back over her head and blew steam from her coffee into the air you turned your eyes to the bearly visible waters far below the open window. How hypocritical she was, demanding that you take care of yourself when she was continuing to experiment on herself to the point that veins were slowly dying beneath her skin.

It was supposed to be a boring day. That morning you were supposed to be filing through the riot reports and security footage to determine which agents would be permanently removed from Talon, but life and apparently your partners in crime had other plans for you. As you thumbed through news stories on a screen in your lap you came across the first one that almost made you drop it out the window and into the water. 'Jack Morrison Alive!!' read the headline of the local Bloomington articles, 'Overwatch Strike Commander Found Shot In Home: A Story Of Survival' read another written by a wannabe journalist off the east coast. The world knew. They knew he was alive and there was nothing you could do about it. Just as you were getting to the parts about a mysterious woman found dead in his home, Gabe came into the lab seemingly in a rush and nodded to Moira behind his Reaper mask. 

"Is everything ready?" He asked voice strained. It was too early, they were up to something.  

"Of course." Moira didn't even look up from her papers to acknowledge him. She looked to you through the side of her eyes, locking with yours beneath low lids. "Maximilien will be joining us in a few moments under the assumption that is he is here to sign off on the medical division's expenses. I suggest you put your mask on." 

Before you even had a chance to catch up to your thought process your mask was over your face and a small team was holding the lab doors open to Max who strolled in adjusting his cuffs perfectly in place. You stayed still at the window, frozen in fear pretending as if your heart wasn't racing, pretending as if you couldn't see black smoke sticking to the dark shadows in the corner or the way Moira watched you with an anticipating stare. They'd set him up and just expected you to follow through with their plan, they were forcing your hand and you chewed at your cheeks stewing in the humiliation of knowing they were likely having conversations about how you'd failed all too many times to follow through, about how you were too weak to get Max on your own. It stung in the center of your heart thinking if you didn't do it now, they'd forever hold it against you. 

As he read through documents and flipped for signatures you could feel his head turning to look at you, robotic eyes falling on you as you forced yourself to look out the window and wonder what the consequences would be if you just jumped straight into the deadly ocean to avoid your duties. 

"Lightning, a pleasure to see you. What brings you to the medical wing so early in the morning?" The fake chipper in his voice could have made you sick. 

"She helps me organize from time to time." Moira butted in, flipping to the next page for him. 

They made forgettable small talk as they finished up the monotonous task of office work before he thanked her and began to leave with his team. Knowing just where to look, you followed a black shadow across the ceiling that dipped behind the door and into the hallway waiting for you to follow the omnic and his team. Moira was tight lipped watching you carefully and darting eyes between you and Max disappearing through the doors.

"Fuck." You muttered just beneath your breath before you flipped on your voice modulator and called out to him. "Max!" He stopped and turned to face you, somehow smug you'd got to your feet just for him. You didn't want to do this. You couldn't do this. You shouldn't- "I was hoping I could talk to you about joining your team, do you have a few minutes?" 

He nodded to his agents at his side, sending them away as you stood in silence and Moira's lab doors closed behind you. Alone. Alone with him in the hall and now you weren't sure what your next moves were, you couldn't see Gabe's smoke anywhere. 

"Well? You have my attention. What are you offering?" 

"Your personal hacker. I can get into anything you'd ever need. I can code you programs that would run analytics to maximize your profits at your casinos and hotels. Anything you need." 

"Cute." Patronizing. He cocked his head to the side and robotic eyes squinted just so slightly. "Considering I know you've been attempting to access my files for months and have been unsuccessful. What exactly are you searching for, hmm?" He was circling you like a predator to pray and his horrible little voice was just about to push you over the edge from reluctance to livid. "Perhaps you're looking for something you could use against me? Just like you have with all the other council members."   

That was your switch, the whisper of seedy confidence that forced your veins awake and had you turning fast to grab him by the shoulders. 

"We can do this easily." You threatened, pushing down on him but his robotic strength was holding up against you. “On your knees, Max.”

“You have gone absolutely insane to think I would ever follow orders _from you._ ” He was speaking to you as if you were having a temper tantrum like a spoiled child not getting what they want. 

“I said-” You kicked at his chest, leaving a dirty boot print on his freshly cleaned suit. He stumbled backward, almost falling to his knees but gaining his composure. “ _On your knees_ Maximilien.”

With that, you brought a code up in your mask, one that temporarily disabled motor function for omnics with a high pitched frequency. Within seconds of activating it he crumpled to the floor, hand covering his face almost as if he was in pain before his body appeared to breathe with life again as the frequency burst died down.  

“You do not need to take anything from me, this could be a partnership. Everything would be so much easier if we could just make a deal, don't you agree?” His voice was starting to gain an undertone of panic but he sat back on his knees as you towered above him.

“We know how you operate. You'll always choose the more convenient option, always play to the team that can offer you the most. I don't want your deals or your flimsy excuse for loyalty. I want complete and undeniable control of you, and there is only one way to get it.”

"We could run this place, together." He tried to get up but missed the reflection of smoke forming behind him in your mask. 

"I don't think so." Gabe's voice growled out as he gripped around Max's arms and dragged him into one of the operating rooms. 

You hurried to follow, mind racing as you frantically overrode the door code so no one else could attempt to get in. Poor Max was strong, but he was never a fighter. He always had other people doing his dirty work, always was the first to run and throw everyone else under the bus even in the direst of circumstances. He struggled, he tried to fight Gabe off but you knew just how strong he was and just how little of a chance there was that he would get out of Gabe's hold. Through kicking feet and flailing limbs you helped and Gabe held him down with sharp claws curling between pieces of metal into his body and he struggled against you unbuttoning his expensive suit and forcing his clothes from him, he fought against restraints as you strapped him against the table.

It was a messy and horrible event to reprogram a complex omnic completely, especially one as complicated and with as many modifications as Max had. Unlike humans where you could get away with reinforced straps to keep them against a chair, omnics had to be held down flat to an operating table, restrained using metal cuffs at the neck, wrists, ankles and knees that sends electric pulses to their internal codes to keep them still. You held off on the one to his neck, part of you somehow reasoning _that_ would be too cruel. 

Once Max was perfectly in place, Gabe stepped back and examined him laid over the table. Black cloak dragging along the edge of the table, he circled around to check for any chances that Max could pry himself away before he turned back to you and lifted the chin of your mask so you were looking into his endless mask's. 

“I can stay through this if you want me to.” His voice was gritty and unsure. A clawed hand landed on the height of your waist to pull your body to his.

“No. I don’t want an audience to this.” You dropped your voice and touched the shotgun shells strapped to his chest. “Besides it’s going to take hours and I’ll probably be in a terrible mood afterward. This isn't like Tishler. I don’t enjoy this, you know that.”

“Okay. I hear you. I’ll be in the room when you’re done.” He pressed the foreheads of your masks together, his hand curling at your side before he slipped from the room in silence. You wished you could have kissed him, wished he could hold your hand through the whole horrible process, but you didn’t want him to see you like this.

“How sweet.” Max sarcastically said after the tension was too much.

“It’s better if you’re quiet through this.” You growled at him before moving your tools on the rolling table.

Steady yourself, control your breathing, stop shaking or you’d fuck this up for everyone. Suddenly all the tools looked foreign, numbers running down the screen on the inside of your mask looked more like hieroglyphics. How long could you stand there pretending to choose which screwdriver to use first before he knew something was up? This felt so wildly different than taking a life, especially when Max wasn't a monster that you could project your feelings onto and relish in him becoming a husk of an omnic.

You looked back to him and let out a long breath. His head was lifted, dulled eyes watching your hands hover over tools that belonged in a red box in the back of a garage somewhere in suburbia, not on an operation table. Sweat was rolling down your forehead and into your eyes blurring your vision almost as if you were crying. The longer you let sweat fall the more it was burning and the more you were considering how it wouldn’t really matter if he knew who you were now. You left the tools in place and made your way to the opposite side of the room where you carefully piled all your armor and unneeded weapons in the corner. His neck strained as he tried to watch as you stripping down to basic combat pants and a shirt bearing the Talon logo on the arm. Last to go was your mask, you faced away from him as you removed it, steadying your heart rate as you pulled it from your head and pushing every shaking breath from your lips as you looked back to him through the corners of blurred eyes.

“Ah.” He sighed with realization and the back of his metal head thunked against the operation table. “I guess I should have known. That’s quite funny, isn’t it? Talon had its eyes on you for so long and no one seemed to know you were right here.”

“Shut up." 

"Is that why Tishler is dead, did he realize who you were?" 

"Shut up Max." 

"I always thought you'd make a great addition to Talon. We had our eyes on you ever since you used to fight with that strike commander, did you know that? We had agents watching you for so long and yet still somehow you slipped under the radar and managed to become one of the council members with no one the wiser." 

Grinding your teeth together, your fingers curled around a screwdriver, you sat hard in a chair next to the table and twisted it against the highest notch on his shoulder. His arm seemed to twitch away, almost as if in pain before he lulled his head to the side to watch you wordlessly wiping sweat from your eyes and removing tiny screw after tiny screw and gathering them in a box all sectioned out so you knew which pieces would go back where the belonged. The buzzing of the cuffs fought against the sound of muffled waves outside a window sealed shut behind drawn blinds. 

“I never took you for someone who would circuitwash. Will you tell me if I'll remember anything?" There was a sudden sincereness in his voice. 

“I’ve got pretty good at pulling the useful stuff. Accounts, passwords, contacts, you’ll remember people but you won’t remember why. Any memories with emotions attached to them, anything that’s not pure data will be dumped. You'll know the basic things you were initially built with, like how to operate large properties, accounting, leadership. You'll still be you, but with fewer memories and once I'm done I'll essentially be in full control of what you can or can't do, any process function I don't approve of prior will trigger an alarm with me to approve or decline."  

He laid in silence for a while, watching you and pretending as if you were hurting him by unscrewing the plates from his arm. You tied your hair away from your face, accidentally smeared some type of oil from his internal pistons across your face and continued to work in focused silence until he decided to speak again as you were tugging on the connectors between his arm and the torso section. 

"This truly is a shame. Someone as gorgeous as yourself wasting away in a place like this. Tell me, what is your end goal? Will you bring Talon down just like Overwatch always planned to do? Even if you control those at the highest level, there will always be those who continue on with our work. Talon is not just the power of a few wealthy people, it is a global collective, a family of agents who need it to survive." 

"Keep talking and I'll detach your voice controls next." You threatened as you carefully popped off the socket to his arm and laid the limb on its own to the side.

He groaned, his metal body seemingly jumping in response to you removing the tightly woven pieces keeping his arm attached to his chest. The hand still attached to him curled into a tight fist, knuckles pushing hard against the table beneath them.

“Don’t tell me you can actually feel that?” You asked almost sarcastically as you pried apart interlocking wires on his side.

“An unfortunate side effect of the many modifications I made to feel more like one of _you_.” His voice sounded like he was in pain and that made your heart jump, this wasn’t supposed to hurt. None of the other omnics ever told you they felt pain. “You do not need to look at me with such sad eyes. I understood what I was doing when I installed sensory functions. The price for the ability to feel pleasure is also the ability to feel pain.”

“Oh.” You leaned back, using the back of your wrist to push your hair back from sticking on your forehead. For a moment you considered allowing him to feel it, to deal with the pain of feeling every limb removed from his body but you shook your head concluding you drew a line somewhere. With the screwdriver at his throat, you tapped the end and leaned against his chest for a better angle. “Which wire controls that?”

“The thin red one.” He stretched his neck, hydraulics pushing it as far back as he could go to give you the most access. “Be careful which one you cut, the thicker red one controls motor function.”

“I’m not going to cut it.” You grumbled as you unscrewed the plate from his neck. He was holding back groans of pain as you pushed around bundles of now exposed wires to reach where the thin red one was plugged into his motherboard at the base of his metal skull. Hoping not to cause him any more pain, you watched his reaction as you tugged on it just enough to unplug. “I know what I’m doing is terrible Max, but I’m not trying to torture you. Once you’re completely reprogrammed I’ll plug this back in, you can still go have your kinky sex or whatever you do with a pleasure center.”

“Would you like to know why I had it installed?” His voice was just a little different now, something missing.

“Sure.” You tried to sound disinterested as you slid across the floor on a stool to the other side of him staring on the other arm. His head followed your hands and it almost felt like he couldn’t look away from the dirty work you were doing.

“I wanted to know what sunlight and sand felt like.” Don’t fall for it. He’s just trying to manipulate you, he’s just trying to make you feel bad for him. "I would constantly see my guests and friends alike back in France come back from a day at the beach, they would always have tans that I was jealous of, their smiles would be so big and they would be laughing. For a long time, I believed they were mocking me, teasing me with something I could never have." 

"Hmm." You chewed at the inside of your cheek, offering a half listening response knowing full well you could leave that memory of experiencing the feeling of the sun and the sand for the first time. It wasn't worth the risk of having any memories that could corrupt other files. As much as you wanted to leave it, you couldn't.

"We could still make a deal, I can see how much you do not want to be doing this." His head was turned towards your face, eyes no longer on your hands at his arm but instead meeting yours. 

"No, Max." You sighed. You had to change the subject, you couldn't feel bad for him. You cleared your throat and darted your eyes to a very human looking phallic object made of flexible metal laying between his legs. "You're the first omnic I've seen with such intricate... stuff going on down there. Trying to be human in every way you can?"

"I was trying to become an improved version of a human. I've had many lovers who enjoy it, most omnics built for sex work are unappealing. Lucky me, I worked with the top designers of the industry to get exactly what I want." He seemed to almost laugh as you made a disgusted face back at him. "If you are so curious I am happy to give a demonstration if you let me out of these restraints."   

"Nice try." You deadpanned. 

You couldn't take hearing him anymore, hearing his cheap attempts to trick you into stopping. Instead of allowing his voice to win you over, you popped in earbuds and blasted a playlist of old songs Gabe mentioned over the years. 

Two hours for the arms. 

Fifteen minutes to wipe the grease and oil from your face. 

Four hours for the legs. 

Fifteen minutes to chug water as you stared through a crack in the blinds to the ocean outside. 

Half an hour to remove the massive plate from the front of his torso. 

As you looked into a mess of wires and lights, the core functions of all of his systems and where all the data of who Maxilimien was it hit you just how absolutely fucked up this was. You were doing to him what was done to Amélie and there was no excuse or justification for the cruelty that was keeping someone alive but having them become a complete shell. With a heavy sigh, you removed blasting music from your ears and stood at Max's side, fingers resting against the coolant junction in the center of his chest that cleaned and pumped out grease all through his body- the closest he had to a heart. 

No longer strapped down, just a head and a broken torso he seemed horrifically vulnerable completely exposed to you.

“Don’t do this.” He begged softly. 

“We’re almost done.” Your voice was quiet too.

One final override and the Max you knew was gone, the Max who betrayed everyone he knew at the earliest convenience would disappear. Your chest felt heavy. He wasn’t asking for much, wasn't resorting to manipulation or sympathy, he was sincere and you could hear it in every scared word. Your hand pushed past bundles of wires until fingers were holding lose and you weren’t sure if your thumb was rubbing against his very core to comfort you or him. 

“After you’ve done what you need to do, would you be so kind as to take me back home to Monaco and let me experience the beach for the first time again?”

What a cruel thing it was, to hear the ocean just outside the window knowing it would be one of the last sounds he would hear. There was a lump in your throat, one that prevented you from making empty promises. Heart aching painstakingly you started up your programs to run multiple codes that would search for data you needed to keep. Accounts, passwords, contacts, knowledge of things that were useful to you.

Luckily for you, unluckily for Max and all over omnics out there, personal memories were stored differently.  

“Goodbye, Maximilien.”

He waited, almost as if you would change your mind at this point.    

“Adieu.”

In total it took 17 hours to disassemble and reassemble such an advanced omnic. You left him in rest mode as you reassembled him and dressed him back in an expensive suit, adjusting his pin on his lapel to a perfect angle. When you were done and the room was unnaturally silent you tried to wipe the stains of black from your skin, you found his oil soaked into your clothes and beneath your fingernails. You left him locked in that room as you quietly slipped out, Moira was sitting in her lab still with the doors open and lifted her tired face to meet yours before you clicked on your mask and hurried to your room. Whatever happened to Max's team seemed to be something you didn't want to question as you hurried by Moira's night crew mopping up puddles of red in one of the rooms. 

Gabe stayed up for you too. He was waiting with bottles of wine and a bouquet of hydrangeas and anemones. He saw the way you sucked in your breath when you saw him, his smiling face dropping as he watched you gather your go bag from the back of the closet. 

“There’s just one more thing I need to do.” You said pushing oil stained hair from your face. “I’m sorry Gabe, I’ll be back in a couple days. This was so sweet of you, really… it’s just, I need to do this for my own sanity.”  

You don't even remember what he said before you were out the door and heading back to the medical wing. 

With your mask covering your face you reactivated him, waiting with the corner of your lip between your teeth as he whirred back to life. Not wanting to frighten him you had him sitting in a chair as opposed to waking up on the table, he blinked his eyes open with sights adjusting to the bright lights before he chipperly greeted you and asked where you were going with the bag strapped over your shoulder. He acted like someone who was trying to be polite to a person whose name they couldn't quite remember- kind, but something was off.  

Talon secret ops flew you to his home, dropped you off at a private landing pad on the top of his hotel. Workers rushed to geet him, fussing over him will all sorts of questions and issues since he'd last been back to run his business. You let him do what he needed, stayed off to the side and hidden behind your mask until a sunny morning when you greeted him for a quiet walk down the sidewalk stretching the coast along white sand beaches and morning drinking vacationers. You walked with him and implanted selective information for Talon all the way until you reached an empty section of the beach far away from any prying tourist eyes. 

He paused in confusion as you reached down and untied combat boots before kicking bare feet into the sand.

"Come on, you too." You said through a small smile as you clicked off your helmet and exposed your now unfamiliar face to him. You watched him closely, watched the way he rolled up the legs of his pants, tucked socks into expensive shiny shoes and carefully sank omnic feet in the shape of human’s into the sand.

“It’s so warm.” He exclaimed, even the smallest chuckle somewhere behind the surprise. “Won’t you come with me to the ocean edge?”

He held out his hand which you took and stepped over hot sand until you reached the shoreline. Waves rolled over your feet and up against the edge of your pants but you didn't mind it. 

“I feel...” He stopped, pondering his next words before turning to you and you swear he would smile if he could. His voice was so chipper, almost a laugh to it. “Very much at peace here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (˵ ͜。 ͡ʖ ͜。˵) we're nearing the end my friends...


	12. Countdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loyalty in Talon falters.

Phase two.

Phase two began with you being sent off at the top of Max’s casino from a private landing pad. He walked you to the dropship, lending an arm for balance as you started up narrow stairs in. He insisted on having you dress as 'one of the locals', sending you off in a dress down to your feet split to your knees in the center. He chose one with long sleeves, long enough to hide scars that he was far too polite to ask questions about, but he genuinely seemed to understand that although you were working with Talon, you did not want to be recognized. He had a sharply dressed bellhop load up your one bag, something you could have easily done yourself, but he insisted. At the landing pad high in the air the dress fluttered in a chilling breeze, your hands tried to hold it at the bottom to stop it from exposing you indecently.   

“Will you be visiting again soon?” He asked in his most pleasant voice.

“When I can, Max.” You spoke gently with him. Too gently, you knew, it wasn’t like he could suddenly remember what you’d done to him, but the only thing you could offer him now that you controlled every aspect of him was kindness. 

As the ship lifted into the air you were left looking out a dirty dropship window to an omnic adjusting the pin on his suit to be perfectly in place. You brought your nail to your lips, biting at it nervously before moving to raw cuticles. With the back of your wrist, you rubbed at tired eyelids. You never were one for sleeping on flights, but you were so exhausted with guilt that you could have passed out on the spot. Sinking low into your seat and crossing your legs over soft French fabric, you laid your mask over your face and waited for sleep to finally hit you.

Your dreams were becoming too vivid.

Your mind slipped into a memory of a farmhouse and a blue dress with flowers on it, you were wandering from room to room but everything about the home just felt a little off. The appliances were updated, the furniture looked too close to the rooms from the Overwatch base, it was a mixing of memories and you were trying to find someone but you couldn't think who it could be. A man stood in the kitchen, tall with broad set shoulders, you made your way across the room to them, wrapping arms from their back and clasping fingers together at their chest. You spoke to the person but they responded back with a drowned voice, speaking almost as if they were in a fishbowl. 

In your heart the super soldier in your arms was Gabe, but he turned, striking blue eyes meeting yours and strong hands gripping you by the chin. Jack, but with Gabe's usual scowl. Jack, but he was dragging you to the back room in the house and you were trying to get away. Jack, but this wasn't a house at all and you were being strapped to an operating table and he was looking at you with such sad empty eyes. 

Dream you tried to thrash around, tried to shake the bindings off, it felt like every which way you were moving you were leaving ghostly trails of yourself and sinking further against the metal table, but Jack was silently watching as your body gave up a fight.        

'Don't do this, don't do this, don't do this-' You were begging behind unheard sobs as he checked a tray of tools to his side, finally landing on a screwdriver with a tip that splintered out looking like a broken star.

The operating room slowly became foggier, Jack slowly disappeared behind brown smoke leaving you in a cloud of confusion. Then, hands were on you, hands undoing the restraints and sliding up the bottom of that blue floral dress. You didn't have to see him to know the hands belonged to Gabe, they touched you the same way he did, rough with little squeezes as he handled your body and lifted you from the table. 

'Are you still confused about your feelings?' His deep voice rumbled at you, a large hand slipping between your thighs. 

'We can help you with that.' Jack's voice mumbled at your ear, his fingers curling over the skin of your neck and chin before two fingers pushed past your lips and deep into your throat without a care of cutting off your air. It was like your body wasn't your own anymore, you were giving yourself completely to the unseen men in the smoke touching you in ways both of them had. Roaring of farming equipment deafened the room as your moans were caught on the fingers of a former lover, roaring that grew louder and louder and louder-

You woke with a hard gasp that sent your body curling forward and your mask clattering to the floor of the dropship. The roaring of the engine had made its way into your mind and startled you awake. All alone on a dropship, you curled your knees to your chest and pressed your face between them. Hold it together, you just needed to hold it together long enough to dismantle Talon, then you could focus on facing your flip-flopping feelings of a dead man being found very much alive.

Wiping sweat from your forehead, you pushed out a long steadying breath knowing you'd need to put a brave face on for the next steps. You changed into your usual uniform, all black with a reflective mask and tried to shake off the guilt of what you'd done to Max, the guilt of Jack still being alive and not knowing he saw you, you tried to leave everything behind in Monaco. 

* * *

With all the leaders under strict control, you began making massive changes to the day to day operations. First came the breaking of arms deals, weapons and ammo no longer being carted through smaller criminal organizations- with Gabe's orders Talon ceased providing guns and bombs to syndicates from all over the world. It was a quick cut, supplies no longer being sent out and warnings to the organizations not to retaliate proved to see crime in war-torn areas freeze for a brief moment. Then the chaos started, now unable to get their weapons from a steady source gangs were resorting to attacking each other or attacking shipments across the country. Talon agents were turning to these organizations looking for a payday if they provided information on when certain weapons were being transported to be destroyed, a problem you dealt with by having multiple teams thinking they were sending out loads only for one of them to actually have the weapons- anyone attacked on the decoy loads would be detained and you would turn a blind eye as they were carted down thrashing all the way to Moira's lab. 

It was wrong, you knew it was wrong, but dammit you couldn't let one agent ruin your plans now.

One of the inner council members tried to turn, they thought they were being slick by going straight to their highest government to testify against everything he knew Talon had done, but it only proved detrimental to him when his extramarital affairs and documented treason were 'accidentally' slipped into the court files. You and Gabe laughed about his downfall for days after that.   

Then it got to a point where your own agents were turning on you.

You were escorting a decoy truck, the back filled with empty space and Talon agents surrounding you all holding their guns just a little too close to their chests. Instead of the radio playing lightly the car sat in dead silence, every shift of an agent snapped the attention of the others almost as if they were waiting for something, almost as if they were waiting for a signal. The driver slowly turned down a road that was not part of the route and you became acutely aware that although you were the highest rank, you were completely outgunned. In silence, you watched as the car pulled up to an abandoned home in the outskirts of the city where three other vehicles were already parked, your other decoys and your truck filled with weapons that were supposed to be melted into heaps of metal. 

"Where did you take me?" You asked in your most calm voice beneath the modulator. 

Instead of answers the agents poured from the open doors, guns drawn at you from every angle as one held out magnetic cuffs waiting for you to attempt to fight him. Behind your mask you looked around, you were surrounded but you weren't scared. No yelling or fighting, you just had to see for yourself where this pathetic attempt at a coup was going, you held out your wrists together and waited as the agent circled the cuffs at your wrists with shaking hands. They pushed at the small of your back with their guns guiding you forward into a massive empty warehouse that reeked of far gone meat. 

They walked you through other agents readied with their weapons, tapping your fingers together you counted how many were taking part in this, 21 in total. You huffed out an annoyed breath, there were a lot of them, all with guns, but you could take them down. You'd probably be hurt in the process, or make a big mess but beneath your mask you had a smirk- they had no idea how easy it was to take down agents who never paid attention in morning practice. These agents were too stupid to even realize you were far more dangerous than just being held back with a pair of weak magnetic cuffs. 

It appeared you were not the only one entertaining this little power play. The agents led you to a room where Reaper was strapped to a flimsy chair. You almost felt pity, or like you were going to laugh- to give them credit, they tried their best. They had him cuffed, wrists bound to the back of the chair. Afraid he’d be too strong, someone had the bright idea of binding his ankles with rough rope and it looked almost comical to see him sitting there in that chair looking almost _bored_.   

"You too, huh?" You asked him, trying to hold back a smirk. 

"Figured they'd be bringing you along." There was something in his voice, an anticipation of something. "Let's get this over with." 

"No talking." A Talon agent demanded, shoving at your shoulders towards a chair just on the other side of Gabe. They sat you down in the chair but ignored tying up your ankles, a misstep that would be their downfall. "You two have made changes that have only hurt Talon, and since the inner council won't do anything about it, we're taking things into our own hands. We all want our ranks returned to us, and our pay to increase back to what it used to be."

"You don't get your way from being a whiny brat and taking your leaders hostage." You growled out. 

"No, but if you don't comply with us we're going to hand you off to the leaders of all the gangs you cut off weapons from, they've been organizing and they're not happy about your decisions." 

"Is that right?" Gabe chuckled behind you. "Which leaders would that be?" 

Agents shuffled on their feet, no one willing to snitch on who would have the gall to come together behind Talon's back. Your wrists were beginning to hurt from the cuffs, the angle they were being held at behind your back causing your shoulders to pinch together in pain. They were discussing something about how they could convince either of you to give in to their demands and you were digging your boot heels against the floor moving your hands around. Behind you, clawed fingers tapped impatiently against the chair. As the agents mumbled among themselves, you gently pried apart the cuffs until you popped them from their magnetic hold and your arms came swinging out at your sides. 

"Wait-!" The agent in front of you stumbled back surprised to see your strength at being able to rip apart the two cuffs. You threw a hard fist at his mask, landing a blow that made even your armored knuckles hurt before you pulled his gun from him and kicked him to the floor. One shot directly to the skull went straight through his mask at point blank range and his body went limp beneath your foot before you turned to the other agents readying yourself for an attack. 

They outgunned you, but you outsmarted them. You grabbed the freshly dead man from the floor and lifted his body in front of yours as a makeshift shield all while agents were scattering and you were firing back. Their shooting was chaotic, unorganized and lazy. Yours was focused, a cold determination that aimed every bullet until you dropped the body and your chest rose and fell with steady deep breaths. 

20 bodies on the floor. A door slammed shut on the other end of the building sending an overbearing echo across the warehouse. During the fight one managed to get away, but you didn't mind. He would warn the others, he would tell them how his team failed, he would tell them they'd have to try harder next time- but you were going to ensure there would be no next time. Having killed again you more annoyed than anything else, and you knew you should have been scared about your reaction, but you couldn't help turning back to Gabe who never once left his seat. 

"What, you fall asleep or something? Could have used the help." You stood in front of him, hands on your hips staring down before you leaned forward to click off his mask. You let it fall to the floor with a dull thud, disturbing the trail of blood lingering between his feet.   

“Have to make it interesting sometimes.” He smiled and dropped his head back, half-lidded eyes watching you as you circled around him to check the Talon agents for their pulses. His wrists bound together with magnetic cuffs he clearly wasn’t struggling against their hold, no intention of leaving his restraints.  

“We both know you can get out of that.” You couldn’t help but smile back as you spoke over your shoulder.

“I was enjoying the show.” He growled, a noise of something happy with a hint of a laugh low in his throat.

He lifted his hips into the air for a moment then sat back in a more comfortable position to show you _exactly_ how much he was enjoying it. You undid the clasps at your mask, carrying it lazily at your side before standing in front of him again. Your reflective mask fell next to his on the floor and you ran your fingertips over the line of his jaw. 

"You look good like this, commander." Bent forward with your face too close to his, you spoke against his lips. One hand pushed through rough facial hair, grabbing at his chin while the other fell against the top of his pants. He made a guttural moan as you stroked over his quickly hardening cock through combat pants. 

"Do you know how damn good _you_ look? My perfect agent, I don't even have to tell you what to do anymore, you know exactly what I want." He was smirking and pushing his hips against your palm. His voice dropped, breathless and gruff. "Get on your knees for me."  

"Hmm, I don't think so." You pushed your hair to one side and dropped your pants, biting back a smirk yourself. "If I have you like this, you're not the one calling the shots." 

"Is that right?" He dropped his head to scowl at you and he looked so dangerous but _god_ did it send a rush of heat across your body. 

With a dull ache between your legs, you straddled over him, your legs on either side of one of his thighs. He sucked in a sharp breath as your core made contact with his covered leg, one hand wandered to grip at the base of his short hair, the other loosely over the base of his neck. Locking eyes with him, you slowly rocked yourself against him, carefully humping at his thigh to build up the heat you were feeling in your core. As you were grinding on him you made no attempt to stifle the gasps and moans that left you each time you rocked just the right way. He was moving his arms, both wanting to rip himself from his flimsy binds and force himself to stay still so you could continue. 

He was trying to kiss you, leaning his head forward, but you pushed back at his throat and kept your lips just out of reach. As you were against him, hips rolling over his leg, you could feel yourself ruining the front of his pants. A wet spot was growing, one that you were sure would leave stains but nothing mattered as much as the way he shook beneath you trying desperately to contain himself. Your fingers gripped harder into his hair, the hand at his throat falling to roughly palm at the front of his pants. Tightly contained you could feel him throbbing with need. Beneath his hard demeaner you could see his blushing cheeks and the way he was tightly grinding his teeth together. 

His thigh pushed hard beneath you, bouncing to make you ride harder and harder against him. 

"These cuffs aren't going to hold me much longer-" 

You cut him off with a deep kiss, one that stole his breath away and made him moan from deep in his chest. As he was lost in your taste, you maneuvered over his lap and undid his zipper. His chest fell with a heavy sigh of relief as you angled yourself against him, pressing his length between socked folds and grinding against him. His content breaths quickly became shaking whines as you continued your teasing now this time along his cock. Fingers pressed along the underside of him, keeping him in place for you to rock over him again and again.   

He was breathing hard, neck straining with flexed muscles as he dropped his head back and moaned hard enough that you thought he was about to break free. You gently pulled at the top of his shirt, exposing his neck as you fell forward to kiss along a vein throbbing with his heartbeat while you lined his tip to your entrance. His body shook, chest shuddering with every ounce of self-control to not wrap his strong arms around you and topple to the floor. You tried to tease him still, even as his tip sunk into you and spread you far apart you were torturing him by going as slow as you could, by sinking over him then pulling away again.

"You can take more than that." He groaned, rolling his neck and bucking his hips up. 

His sudden movement beneath you caught you off guard, pushing in further than you were anticipating making your mind white for a moment. Your hands landed at his shoulders, gripping for support as he thrusted up between your legs again. The noises you made were involuntary, soft gasps that left your lungs as he pushed tight against aching walls, deeper and deeper hoping you would lose your balance and sink completely over him. 

Even with arms behind him, with ankles tied down, he still managed to control the pace. Powerful hips snapped up against yours each time forcing you deeper over him and your body was giving into him completely. By the time you were completely surrounding him, your legs were shaking from being worked so wide, walls twitching with every throb deep in you against your every nerve. 

As your mind caught up with your body you started moving again. Using his shoulders to support yourself you circled your hips up and down against him, using his body for your own benefit. At his back, fists were curling, clenching and moving with the uncertainty of breaking out but you continued to bounce him his lap mercilessly chasing your own high. 

Teasing him even more you leaned forward as if to kiss him again, only to fall to the side of his head and letting all your dirty noises loose next to his ear. As you were panting and whispering curses beneath your breath you felt every pulse deep inside, felt how close he was already- it was so easy to rile him up when he couldn't touch you. With a smirk pressing to his ear, you dropped your hand low, fingers teasing against your own clit.   

"I bet you wish this was your hand." You whispered, making a show of how you were touching yourself as you continued in his lap. 

He grunted and you watched as he attempted to flex his arms to break the cuffs.

"Ah-ah." You scolded, stopping in his lap. "I didn't say you could get out of those." 

He relaxed his shoulders, dark eyes glaring at you until you started moving again. He looked like he almost couldn't take it, the feeling of you above him working yourself until you were trembling. You were so lost in your own high, almost on the verge of falling over, you didn't notice black smoke curling around your thighs and slipping over your skin between bouncing cheeks. 

It was nothing, at first, just a simple prod at an unused hole that at first made you moan until you abruptly stopped to twist and look behind you. A hand formed in smoke was curled at your ass, whispy middle finger waiting patiently ready to push further in, you followed the trail to see the smoke over your skin and going to his back where his wrist was still bound, but his hand was a puff of black. 

"I'm still in the cuffs." He said smugly, finger at your ass gently pushing in with the feeling of a solid one. As he sank in he pushed against your wall, feeling how full you were with him on the other side. 

"Brat." You whined, leaning heavily onto him.   

Too close to stop now, your hips continued their frantic movements now with a digit pushing against you making you feel already so much fuller. As you were leaned forward he kissed at your throat, messy lips all over your neck until you were squeezing your thighs together, until you were digging fingernails into his hair, until you were moaning out his name and your walls were twitching with unbridled pleasure. 

As you were rocking through an orgasm he pushed as deep as he could in you, riding out your high with you before a warm release spilled around him. He stayed buried in you for a while, letting you catch your breath before a careful finger pulled from you and smoke returned to his back. Sweaty and filled to your limits you were limp over him in a loose hug before you felt his shoulders flex and heard the sound of magnetic cuffs being pried apart. 

He was gentle as arms circled to keep you over him, his gloved hands with sharp claws landed at your shoulders and back just carefully enough to not cut. He kissed at your throat again, this time softer and with more thought, slow kisses that made you smile and close your eyes to enjoy completely. 

Once he pulled his lips away, you cracked open your eyes to look around the room. It reeked of blood and something rotten, you snarled at the twisted bodies and the idea that anyone could ever think they could take you down. It was carnage, carnage that was coming to you just a little too easily now.  

"Am I a monster?" You asked quietly, looking at the bodies. 

"No more than I am." His expression was somber, clawed fingers rubbing at you trying to give you any comfort he could. He kissed at your shoulder. "We're almost done, I know it's been rough but you're doing great. When all this is over, we never have to do anything like this again if you don't want it." 

"After we've destroyed Talon, where do you want to go?” You spoke low against his chest in a hushed moment. 

“Somewhere far from here. As things start winding down we should start looking for somewhere to settle down to.”

“Settle down.” You repeated softly. "Let's find somewhere quiet, somewhere no one would ever be able to find us. I want to wake up in the mornings and not have to worry about putting on a mask or being chased down by assholes with grudges. I want to go back to being on the beach with you not worrying about anything other than what we were going to have for lunch that day."

"That sounds perfect." He kissed you with a small smile. "We'll find a place on a coast somewhere. I'll wake you up every day with a bag of gummy bears and we can jump straight into the ocean." 

"I'd love that, Gabe." 

"Me too." That small smile fell as he looked to the bodies surrounding your loving moment. "For now we need to focus, we still have work to do." 

* * *

Late into a foggy night, you were curled in Moira's chair as Gabe was getting one of his enhancement treatments. He always looked so exhausted as he was getting them, ironically while the serum was pumping into him his body was too weak to much else other than to sit back and stare at the ceiling. He reasoned with you that if he was going to keep an iron grip over Talon he'd have to be at his peak strength, but part of you wondered if this is what he'd wanted all along when he hired Moira. Since he started the extra treatments he'd become quicker, his senses sharper, but he was also slipping into long moments of endless black eyes- even when nothing was happening. 

There was a fear there, a very real one, that he was slipping past a point of being able to return, that these serums would push him over the edge from Gabriel to Reaper permanently, but he always snapped out of it the moment he realized he was scaring you. When he'd look at you just a little too mean, or raise his voice just a little too loud, those black endless eyes would fade away and be left with loving ones that would water and constantly ask if he'd done anything to hurt you. He never did, but the fear that one day he may just slip a hand to your throat and squeeze just a little too tight kept you on edge.

The room was buzzing with equipment, you were shifting beneath her coat resting over your body as your mask lit with notification after notification. The alerts drew both of their attention, faces raised in question as you brought a screen into the air above you to check what was alerting so urgently.     

Hits on Jack Morrison's name, news articles and social media stories coming in one after another saying a press conference was being held in ten minutes where he would finally emerge to the world again and announce that he was alive. Gabe and Moira could see the color draining from your face, they watched the news ticker counting down the minutes until Morrison would be taking to a podium outside of Washington DC. 

Weak from the treatments, Gabe was practically glued to his chair as Moira joined you at your side. Waiting for the press conference to start was the longest ten minutes of your life. The air around you felt stifling, every bone in your body felt like it was completely aching. Your head hurt, but maybe it was just because you bearly had any sleep. Your stomach twisted, but you didn't want to admit it was nerves of seeing him again. Gabe watched you with longing eyes, ones that begged for you not to break down as you chewed at raw cuticles.

One minute and you thought about the first time you saw him smiling behind a podium on TV, a moment that inspired you to join Overwatch. 

Two minutes and you thought about burning the picture of him over a trash can, vowing to make his life hell. 

Three minutes and you knew you'd done just that.

Four minutes and you wondered if anyone else you knew was waiting with bated breath for him to take the stage. 

Five minutes and Gabe was shifting in his seat, trying to sit up so he could watch you, but shaking as the serum ripped through his bloodstream. 

Six minutes and you were picturing how he used to look in that plain red hat beneath Indiana skies. 

Seven minutes and you were silently wiping away tears hoping neither Gabe or Moira noticed. 

Eight minutes and you no longer felt like you could breathe.  

Nine minutes and _fuck_ you couldn't do this, you've let him down, he'd hate you now, everything you've done is everything he would have never wanted for you. 

Ten minutes and- oh, there he was.  

Dressed in a striking dark blue suit that looked not completely unlike his old formals, he stood at a podium behind bulletproof glass. Security details off to the side and former Overwatch directors sitting in a row at his back, he was lit with a soft light that highlighted his blond hair was fading to a light white. Along with the plain suit he wore a serious expression, brows down and eyes scanning a crowd unseen by the cameras, scars on his face enhanced with worry lines across his forehead. He adjusted the top button of the jacket before leaning forward to the microphone and standing with his shoulders back, just like he always used to during long ago press conferences.

“My name is John Francis Morrison, many of you know me as Jack Morrison. I grew up on a rural farm in Indiana, joined the military the day I turned 18, and was the Strike Commander to Overwatch’s assault division, as well as the face of the organization for many years and up until now, many people believed me to be dead. Today, I am ready to reveal the truth that I survived the terrorist assault on our home base in Switzerland by an organization known as Talon and have been slowly attempting to piece together exactly what happened just over two years ago. 

As many of you know based on what has been reported by news outlets across the country, I was found shot in the chest in Indiana at my home with a former agent of mine found dead along with me. At the time, I was attempting to hide myself because I was not ready to face a world without Overwatch, I could not imagine what I would be able to do without them behind me. I was weak from multiple injuries caused by the explosion, but I managed to make it home where I knew I would be able to recover. As arrived back to my childhood home, I found an agent by the name of Kiri Arntz occupying it. She, like me, was attempting to return to a normal life when we were attacked by the same organization that is responsible for the explosion on our headquarters. Agent Arntz was attempting to fight back against our assailants and was brutally killed by a Talon agent known to the public as Reaper.  

Overwatch had been investigating Talon for quite some time, however, it appears two new leaders have emerged and were the ones who attacked me in my home and killed agent Arntz. With the help of these former Overwatch directors and combined intelligence forces of the US government, we have determined that the two Talon leaders known as Reaper and Lightning were the ones who personally came to kill agent Arntz after her involvement with the terrorist organization. It is our understanding she was being forced against her will to participate in the activities of the organization and her involvement is still an open investigation. We are encouraging anyone with additional information to come forward, as we are now operating together to take down Talon by any means necessary. Reaper and Lightning are currently at large and are wanted dead or alive by multiple government and private agencies.   

Due to the serious nature of Talon and the continued fighting between human and omnic kind, we can no longer sit back and allow individual government agencies to try and stop these terrorists. With such dangerous and unpredictable criminals embedding themselves into every point of our cultures, we believe that the world now, more than ever, is in dire need of help. Talon was able to knock us down, make us doubt what we can do temporarily, but the world needs _Overwatch_.

With caution and unfaltering support from you, the public, we have come to the decision to recall the organization and start up with anyone who is willing to enlist. In the coming weeks, we will have more information for anyone who would like to join us in returning to our main goal of world peace. I, along with the directors, will be working tirelessly to continue the organization's mission and will not rest until criminals like Reaper and Lightening are brought to justice. 

To the world, and all the people who believed in me, I want to apologize for being away for so long. Continuing to serve for you remains my only goal and I am making this promise now that going forward Overwatch will become a beacon for hope and put a stop to the fear that Talon and all other organizations like it, have filled your lives with. Together we can create a better world, I believe it."

You couldn't breathe. 

"We will begin taking press questions now." A sharply dressed woman pointed to someone in the crowd. 

“Commander Morrison, you were officially listed as deceased- would that not lead you to believe that you may have other agents who survived the explosion?"

"Overwatch medical teams after the explosion were overworked, understaffed, and dealing with the worst kinds of trauma you could ever imagine. I do not blame them for marking some agents as dead if they were unable to find a body in the rubble. If there are any agents out there, I welcome them to join Overwatch again- we will work with local governments to ensure all the proper steps are put into place to return them to a normal life."  

You could feel their eyes on you, watching your every reaction. 

"You mentioned agent Arntz previously served under you, however my team isn't finding any supporting evidence of this. Can you elaborate on what she did with your strike team?" 

"She... agent Arntz was part of a strike team I assembled many years ago that only served one mission... For full disclosure she was a disgruntled former agent, who had every right to hate Overwatch as much as she did."

"Jack-!" Director Petras stood from his seat, face riddled in red. 

"On her very first mission under me, I made a wrong call that mutilated her and almost cost her life. Many of her teammates died that day, others left with physical and mental scars that I alone was responsible for. Only her and one other team member survived an explosion caused by my mistake and Overwatch went to great lengths at the time to cover it up. I fully intend going forward to be absolutely transparent about Overwatch's mistakes. If the public is going to trust us, if we are going to help anyone, we have to be completely honest. I believe agent Arntz originally sought out Talon with the intention of revenge, however she proved herself to be a kind and caring person who, like me, just wanted to feel whole again."    

You felt numb, eyes dropping to stare at scars on your arm.

"Will you be returning to your same role within Overwatch?" 

"We are still in discussions regarding this. I fully intend on joining my teams in the field to bring these scumbags to justice." 

"That's all the questions we can take for now, thank you, everyone for coming." 

Jack looked away from a sharply dressed woman with a microphone cutting him off, then to the dead center of the camera and you _swore_ he was looking right into your eyes. You saw the same eyes as you did when he was _your_ commander. Angry. Determined. Fighting back every urge to something he knows he shouldn't. Instead he adjusted his tie, leaning forward on the podium and your heart felt like it was tumbling far out of your chest. 

"Please, join us if you can. If we're going to take down the evil that has ruined so many lives, the world needs heroes." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The race is on, who breaks first? (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)


	13. ATLAS News

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Different formatting for this one... (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)

**A New Brand Of Hero: Interviews With The Faces Of Overwatch**

Olympia Shaw, ATLAS NEWS

 

The world was shocked to find the former Strike Commander Jack Morrison alive and ready to return to battle once again just over two years ago. Since the announcement, we have seen an unprecedented number of signups to join this new and improved version of Overwatch, everyone from graduates fresh out of high school to agents who survived the explosion which killed so many back on that fateful day in Switzerland, to those in retirement hoping to take up arms for their country again. With new hope and a worldwide collective mission to put an end to terrorism and war, ATLAS news was given once in a lifetime access inside their new home base facility running out of Gibraltar. Our team spent a weekend with the brave souls who are putting their lives on the line to bring peace back.

The Gibraltar base boasts an impressive military presence for how unassuming it appears. A launch pad accessible by aircraft for sky and space alike, a port where a French Navy ship was docked, training grounds and practice rooms that likely rivaled their successor in Switzerland, shooting ranges, massive control and command centers, this place is the true hub of activity for the new iteration of the organization and the enhancements made available with help from the US military prove it.     

Upon arrival, the new Overwatch headquarters was abuzz with activity, humans and omnics alike working together to prepare for a speech to be given by Jack Morrison. We were whisked away to barebone bunkers deep in the mountain that must have at one time housed thousands of agents but now seemed hauntingly empty. Our guide was the ever bubbly and recently promoted to captain, Lena Oxton- or as most of the public knows her, Tracer. We were given full access to the base, able to record and talk about anything we saw there- part of the initiative for Overwatch to be completely transparent.

 **SHAW:** How have things been going for you here so far, Lena? 

 **OXTON:** Amazing! It's a bit weird being one of the senior people, having agents looking up to and all that, but it's fun! I mean, it's a lot of hard work, don't get me wrong, but it's been very rewarding. 

 **SHAW:** What's been the biggest challenge for you so far now that you're back at Overwatch? 

 **OXTON:** Working with the people that have come over from Talon, [she stops us, her signature smile dropping] the things some of these agents have had to live through? It's unimaginable.  

Captain Oxton was as chipper as ever, if not a little apprehensive about the future and her role in it. She gave us the names of some of the agents who were part of a plea deal that transferred from Talon forces to Overwatch. Although knowledgable about day to day processes and mission tactics, she still appears as the happy-go-lucky pilot from London. Sources indicate she was with Overwatch merely just over a year before the explosion that brought the base down, at the time she was undergoing supervision from then Commander Morrison to become a captain, but that training was sadly cut short due to the unfortunate incident. 

The first night we were able to see how things usually happened on the base. Dinner for the ~8,000 person military base occurs between 17:00-20:00 (that's 5pm-8pm for our American readers), during this time we saw the hustle and bustle of familiar faces and new ones just joining the fight. Getting an inside look at these soldier's day to day life was, in a word, sobering. Their common areas are sparsely furnished, much of it left behind when the facility was abandoned after the PETRAS Act three years ago. Their barracks often do not have functioning doors, many agents choose to bunk together despite the overwhelmingly available beds on base. Each room boasts a modest fridge smaller than the size of the average soldier, a lonely microwave and sink, and a bathroom that would envy a commercial flight's.   

It was on this first night that we popped into a room shared between two former Overwatch agents who, despite the tragedies at hand, managed to fall in love and find comfort each other. One agent, Dr. Angela Ziegler was formerly the chief of medical staff with Overwatch, the other a former Blackwatch agent who has opted to remain unnamed. 

 **SHAW:** It must be strange working for Overwatch again? 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** Very much so. It took... a lot to agree for me to come back, but I am happy I did. The world needs the hope that Overwatch brings, the world needs people who want to help and those willing to sacrifice everything to ensure Talon is taken down. 

 **SHAW:**  It must be nice to be around familiar faces this time around. 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** It does, very much so. Initially, I joined Overwatch as a way to make the world a better place after the death of my parents during the first omnic war, but now I know I have a family here. We all watch each other's backs, take care of each other. It really feels like we're all finally on the same page about what Overwatch _is_. 

 **UNNAMED AGENT:** No more secret teams, or threats from higher up-

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** He means to say that we believe this version of Overwatch is already having a much more positive impact on the world. Since Overwatch is being so open about what they're doing now, I really feel as if I've been able to take place in some life changing work. Not only are we making incredible advancements in bio-omnic enhancements, but we're making significant strides regarding the mental impact these elements have on a subject. It's fascinating work!   

 **SHAW:** Sounds like it! But, it must be difficult too. Overwatch had a much larger medical team before, although your team is larger than private practices it's still nowhere near what it used to be. All the people who couldn't be here, the friends and people you must have considered family who you lost in the explosion. 

 **UNNAMED AGENT:** We can not dwell in the past, but we also do not forget that we are continuing on the fight for those who can not.   

This agents words rang true through the rest of our time spent on the base. As the night was coming to a close and the sun was sinking beneath a rocky mountain edge we were left to wander through the halls to experience the day in the life of an Overwatch agent first hand. Just outside of their barracks is a long hall, filled floor to ceiling on each wall of projected pictures rotating through the ID pictures of every agent who lost their lives while under Overwatch's care. Among them are the agencies formerly secret branch, the Blackwatch agents who lost their lives not only in the explosion at the Swiss headquarters but also those who died in a much less publicized explosion years prior in Oslo. Agents who died on missions, who went missing and were never heard from again, everyone including the now infamous Kiri Arntz. 

The Arntz Act allowed global leaders to detain and try worldwide cases in front of a global council instead of being sentenced to one country's legal system alone. Following the initiation of the Arntz Act to today we have seen six Talon, a dozen leading CEOs of companies in fields like pharmaceuticals, banking and manufacturing, and a handful of smaller terrorist organization leaders all brought to justice. The act sought out in her name has been instrumental in the dismantling of such a large organization that seemingly had made its way into every crack of society.

Looking at her ID picture displayed so proudly on the wall next to the rotating images of other agents who lost their lives in the name of Overwatch really grounded the reality of how serious the so-called 'Second Omnic War' had become. Talon is frequently cited as being the instigator for kicking off the fighting between human and omnics, often the brutal murder of Kiri Arntz referred to as the key moment that fueled the tension between Talon and Overwatch and began this second war. Looking to her picture among all the others in that hall, it's hard to imagine an agent who was part of Overwatch for so little a tiny would have such a huge impact on the world. That seems to be the message of Overwatch, however- anyone can be a hero.          

Gibraltar was experiencing a rare clear night the first evening we were there. From our room, old windows looked out over a calm ocean and a lonely lighthouse casting its foglight toward passing freight ships. Every so often the sound of whistles from the boot camp on the other side of the island would drift through the air and bounce off our window, all night until we woke in the morning to join agents for their regular breakfast meal time from 05:00-09:00. We were joined by the agents we'd met the night before, they kindly allowed us to sit along with them as they discussed their recent success on a field mission a few days prior. 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** Everyone is recovering quite well, I went and checked on our injured members before heading down here! [she turns to me to explain, she is already dressed in her lab coat] Our latest mission was to apprehend Talon agents at a known hideout. We're attempted to recover as much of their memories as we can, however, we're still struggling with the intensive reprogramming many of them have gone through. We're taking care of as many as possible. 

 **SHAW:** These are agents, both human and omnic alike who were reprogrammed to become between agents, correct? We're referring to brainwashing and circuitwashing? 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** In the crudest terms, yes. 

 **SHAW:** Have these agents been of any help in taking down Talon forces? 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:** Ah, I think that might be a better question for our captain- [she motions to a man who we'd sat next with but paid no attention to, with a scruffy beard and, of all things, a cowboy hat, the man smiled at us] McCree? 

 **MCCREE:** We've been able to extract some real interestin' pieces of information from 'em. From what we can make out it seems the leaders over there are intent on no one bein' able to rat them out. Anyone that tries to leave is either killed, reprogrammed, or straight up missin'. Despite the doc's best efforts we haven't been able to get any solid evidence against the person doin' all of it. 

 **SHAW:** It sounds as if you might know, but just don't have the proof to get them. 

[Captain McCree and Dr. Ziegler share a look that told us they knew exactly who was responsible for the brainwashing but would refuse to say anything else regarding it.] 

 **DR. ZIEGLER:**  We're getting closer to having something solid for the crimes of brainwashing humans, however, it's proving incredibly difficult to track down someone with the skillset needed to reverse engineer the circuitwashing. 

It was at this time the Unnamed Agent and Captain McCree seemed to have a silent conversation with each other. The mood around the table became increasingly uncomfortable as we all settled to an all too familiar silence. Overwatch may not be keeping secrets, but it appears some of its agents may very well be. ATLAS News refuses to leave any stones unturned and has been diving deeper into an investigation on the increasingly terrifying horror that is circuitwashing. Stay tuned next week as we reveal the secrets and attempt to unravel the mystery of who would have the knowledge and ability to perform such heinous acts.      

After a morning of bearly warmed frozen waffles, we were led to the seating area to listen in on a speech to be given by Jack Morrison. Recently appointed as a director for Overwatch, he was honoring three agents with the rank of lieutenant. Two newcomers and a face who was removed from the hall of missing and dead agents: Ana Amari. Previously a captain, reports indicate she went missing during an attempted recovery mission of a former Blackwatch commander's wife (who we now know joined the ranks of Talon and is on the global wanted list). Her pinning of the lieutenant rank was an emotional and healing move seemingly not just for the whole of Overwatch, but also for her daughter who watched alongside us in the crowd as a new agent still earning her place within the organization.  

After a three hour long ceremony, Jack Morrison walked into the interview room looking just as handsome and sharp as he used to back when he was the most well-known commander. 

 **SHAW:** Thank you all for taking some time to sit with us, we know you must be very busy these days. 

 **MORRISON:** I'll always make time to interview with you, it's always a pleasure working with you Olympia. 

 **SHAW:** Always the charmer, Director Morrison, happy to see you haven't changed too much since the world thought you were dead. How have you been, really? 

 **MORRISON:** Things are getting better. After Overwatch fell and I was injured, I was not going great. For a while there I gave up on my life's mission, on everything I'd worked for up to that point. Then we were attacked... [by Talon], things just changed. It was like I became the person I'd always set out to be again. As I'm sure you know, I lost a lot of friends, a lot of loved ones that day, and I know I need to keep working harder every day to make them proud. If I can't tell myself that I've done something they would be proud of, then I'm not doing enough. Sorry, I think I must be rambling, it's been a while since I've done an interview like this [he laughs], in short, I guess the answer is I've been okay. Taking it day by day. 

 **SHAW:** The world is thankful to have you back in action, it wasn't the same without you. 

 **MORRISON:** So you say. [he laughs again] It's good to be back, as much as I know I'm getting too old for this I can't help but feel the need to be back at this again, you know?  

 **SHAW:**  Right where you belong! So, Overwatch has become the global leader for equality, the current workforce is 50/50 human and omnic and is fighting for the rights of omnics everywhere to all be created on the same level with standard intelligence ai chips as opposed to the normal one task omnics we've seen for years. Previously Overwatch had a 10/90 split, why the big change? 

 **MORRISON:** I really came to understand the meaning of day to day life between humans and omnics while was home. Before, like many people, I saw omnics as tools or as lesser beings who were there just to serve the only functions they were built for. With a lot of humility and learning, I came to realize that having a soul doesn't have anything to do with your body being organic or made of metal. Omnics have every right to take part in serving their countries or falling in love. After living through the first omnic war I was initially hesitant to believe that, but now that I'm seeing the world go through it again, I just can't imagine all the lives that are being ripped apart because of needless hate.    

 **SHAW:** You, along with the US military are leading a global initiative to bring human rights to omnics, is that correct?  

 **MORRISON:** Exactly correct. In addition to our goal to bring in the Talon leaders and prevent them from spreading fear, we are attempting to outlaw discriminatory practices to omnics across the globe. 

 **SHAW:** Now these Talon leaders, most of them _have_ been detained isn't that right? 

 **MORRISON:** We have been able to easily apprehend all but four Talon inner council members. There is a strong suspicion of a former Overwatch and Blackwatch agent practicing illegal medical trials on agents within their organization who we have yet to gather any solid evidence against. A businessman who used to be their accountant and has worked with Overwatch before but seems to be completely clean on paper and claims to have no memory of working within Talon. Working to gather evidence on both of them is frustrating. Their funds are quickly depleting along with their agent force, things are looking up for us to be able to stop them soon. 

 **SHAW:** What about the other two?

 **MORRISON:** The other two are most wanted criminals by every global government agency. Reaper and Lightning are wanted on [he unfolds a list from his jacket pocket and reads off it] espionage, kidnapping, torture, Hacked Unwilling Modification of Omnic Nature, perfidy, the intentional and unintentional killing of civilians, illegal arms trades, use of guerrilla warfare, manslaughter, and every degree of murder, among so many other things. Reaper and Lightening are considered the most deadly terrorists currently alive and we beg the public to tell us if you have any information on their whereabouts but to stay as far away from them as possible if they have the unfortunate chance of happening upon them. Their last standing base of operations is found in Rialto and is, frankly, a fortress that seems almost impossible to take down. That's where the two final leaders are hiding out and we beg the public to stay away.  

 **SHAW:** We understand you've personally had some run-ins with the Talon leaders, is that right? 

 **MORRISON:** Unfortunately, yes. After they attacked me in my own home I have had direct contact with them four times now. 

 **SHAW:** Are you able to share the details of these encounters? 

 **MORRISON:** The most I can share is that they are incredibly dangerous. Reaper seems to have some inhuman power that allows him to maneuver around tight spaces, he appears to be much more of a brunt force leader than Lightning does.

 **SHAW:** You can't share anything more than that? You are a director now after all, surely you could give us something.  

 **MORRISON:** [he thinks for a few quiet moments, checking his phone before he removes his formal jacket to speak candidly with us] The first three times I came face-to-face with them they were not expecting it, the first, I was running an ambush squad on what we thought was a low-level gun run. As soon as we confirmed they were in the convey I pulled my team from the mission because I was not willing to put them in danger, but Reaper and Lightening seemed to realize I was there and found me before I could get everyone out. It is my belief, not the belief of Overwatch, that Reaper is far more dangerous than Lightening despite the articles your company has written claiming she was personally responsible for countless murders within Talon. 

 **SHAW:** Why would you believe she is not as dangerous as she is? 

 **MORRISON:** She hesitates to kill. Not with everyone, but I could tell with the way she fought that she's holding something back with certain people. I can't explain it, it's a gut feeling that there's something more there. My greatest fear is that she is one of the agents who was being trained under the most skilled hacker I knew in Overwatch, I think she may have some sort of connection to the older agents here. 

 **SHAW:** You said the first three times you came into contact with them they weren't expecting it, did they anticipate your fourth attack? 

 **MORRISON:** No they... they came to us, actually. More specifically Lightning found us on what was supposed to be a highly classified mission to a former Talon data center, to our surprise she was alone- or so we thought- and she actually tried to tell us we were all on the same side. These people are so diluted they actually believe what they're doing is helping the world. It's disgusting. Taking them into custody is my top priority.   

 **SHAW:** If they were reading this right now, is there anything you'd want to say to those criminals? 

 **MORRISON:** Overwatch will find you. Dead or alive, we will make you pay for every crime you've committed that has hurt and killed countless innocent victims. I will do every last thing in my power to ensure both of you are stopped and Talon is destroyed with no trace of it left. Even if it's the last thing I do, you will be brought to justice.   

Strong words from a strong director. Jack Morrison has taken to his new role quite well, despite continuing to serve with his agents in the field. 

We here at ATLAS News try to bring you the most honest take of every story. The new version of Overwatch is still figuring out the bumps in the road, their organization is shaky at best, but their goals are clear and they're achieving much needed advancements in terms of medical discovery, basic rights, equality and the pursuit of justice. The road to a peaceful life with Overwatch at one time seemed like an impossible dream, but with the guidance of Director Morrison and the many familiar faces, we know Overwatch is in good hands to be led exactly where it needs to go to serve the world in a way the original Overwatch never could. For the first time in years, the road ahead looks bright with a hopeful future where humans and omnics may truly be at peace together and we could see a world prospering without being on the brink of, or in the middle of, war.    

On our final day of the weekend on their home base, we sat with all different agents and just listened to their life stories. Tales of everyday heroes who took up arms to serve for a new military that is bringing the world into a new era. Our interviews with these agents will be airing throughout the week on ATLAS News. If you are or know someone who has joined Overwatch, please contact us to have your story heard!   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to be a tease with such a short chapter ( ° ͜ʖ °) Big things are coming, can you feel it?


	14. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It would be nice to just stay at home.

"It's fucking freezing here." You shivered and hugged your arms against your body. 

"Hey, to be fair, I asked you to choose between Alaska or the tropics and I seem to recall your exact words were, 'Are you kidding me, Gabriel? I'd rather die than be in the sun.' to which I responded, 'So you'd rather be cold than warm?' and then I'm fairly positive you lowered the air conditioning as far as it could go."  

"It was a little unfair to ask me that on the _hottest day of summer_ while we were at that terrible compound in _Brazil."_

"Alright, maybe I was trying to influence your choice a little." Gabe laughed as his arm fell over your shoulders, bringing you close to him under a gentle snowfall. "I think you're going to like the place though, what do you think of the outside?" 

Paid completely in cash, done through Max’s accountants and three proxies- here you were finally seeing a house Gabe chose months ago as a place to land once everything falls into place. Situated just off a small private dock from cold waters in the Gulf of Alaska, the tiny cabin wasn't modern by any means, in fact, it looked like no one had touched it since it was built on the rocky coastline decades ago. Above the door hung a broken decorative ship wheel, snow fell from the tiny covered porch down to rocks below making old wood steps slippery with ice. Windows shuddered close, lights off, surrounded with morning fog, it looked like an abandoned cabin you'd see in horror films. 

"It's perfect." You smiled at him, resting your head against his chest. 

He helped you from the small boat onto the slippery dock then carefully held you as you approached the front door together. There was a little chill in the air, a cold that snapped at the skin on your nose but it felt nice against how warm he was and he gasped softly as soon as the door clicked open.

"Wait-" He looked to you with a smile, holding out his hands before falling to smoke and slipping between the crack into the house. You listened with a held smile as he reformed and lights flickered on as he pulled the door open wide for you. "Welcome home." 

The first time you stepped into your home with him he held the door far from his body, you ducked beneath his arm and entered the same way you would have entered a very tired commander's room after nightmares long ago. He laughed and turned with you as you took in the dated decor and a black iron fireplace with a hefty chimney that rested on a stone slab between the open kitchen and living room. The house wasn't large by any means, but there was room enough to spread out. The large open floor plan in the front half of the house led to a cozy bedroom and a bathroom with an iron tub that sat in front of a window overlooking the water. He followed you around the house with arms at your waist and kisses along the top of your head, practically giggling with happiness that he was finally able to share this with you. 

"It's wonderful, Gabe." You sighed as you twisted in his arms until you were holding the sides of his face. "I love it." 

"Good." He tickled your face with his goatee, facial hair lifting as he smiled and kissed you over and over again. "Only a few more weeks until we officially move in." 

His arms fell from your waist to the backs of your thighs, wrapping your legs around his hips as you cried out in a happy laugh and he kissed along your cheek carrying you into the sparsely furnished bedroom. As he pinned you to the bed it squeaked from the sudden movement and sent both of you into a laughing fit. The blankets puffed with a layer of dust, you were almost positive they must have been there from the original owners they looked so old. The list of things you needed to get to make this place truly feel like your own home was growing quickly, and it started with sheets that didn't have prints of polar bears on them. 

"I can't believe we're actually doing it." You sighed as he unzipped the down jacket from your body. "We did it Gabe. We did what Blackwatch, what Overwatch never could. We destroyed Talon from the inside out." 

"Don't jinx it just yet." He laughed as he kissed a bruise on your arm from a fight with Overwatch agents just days ago. "We still have one thing left to do."          

Everything was falling into place. All the leaders who helped bring the terrorist organization into it's prime were gone, either behind bars or six feet beneath the earth. The troops of dedicated agents had dwindled down to the last dozen or so teams of true die-hard believers, people who molded their entire personalities about staying loyal to Talon. The money was almost all gone, most of it transferred in secrecy to helpful nonprofits that needed the funds- it was blood money, but it was blood money being put to good use.

You were so close, so fucking close you could taste the bitter victory on the tip of your tongue. It was time to prepare for the final moments. It took years of preparation, years of struggling to find a balance, but it was coming to an end. The secondary bases and outposts had been decommissioned, something Gabe saw to himself. You'd put all of yourself into making sure Talon was driven straight into the ground, protected who you could along the way, but it was almost time for the final step in destroying Talon from the inside out. Moira would be moving on to teach at a university full time that focused on genetic research. After a long night and her third cup of black coffee, she told you in the quiet of her lab that all she wanted to do was return to the work she'd started long before she worked with Gabriel. Max would be exempt from any crime, you ensured he was completely untraceable with any ties to his involvement. Part of you was sad to know you likely would never see him again after all this was done, but your heart hurt like a knife twisting in your chest every moment you were around him. 

Now, you were waiting on one last piece of the puzzle, a grand finale of doing to them exactly what they’d done to you: An explosion that would send Talon's base sky high before tumbling it broken and soulless as it was into the Italian sea. While you were playing house with Gabe, Moira had reprogrammed agents rigging the lower levels of the base with explosives.

Gabe's hands were slipping up your sides over bruise after bruise, pushing at your shirt as you sighed and looked to him with a somber face. 

"Do you want to talk about it?" He stopped, asking with a quiet voice. 

"I wish he would listen. How can he not see that we're all on the same side?" Your fingers pushed against the largest one, touching where a pulse bullet hit you in the stomach and embedded deep into your armor during a fight days before. Morrison knew what he was doing. If he was trying to kill you he wouldn't have aimed for an armored section. "Do you think he would have shot me if he knew who I was?" 

"We can't-" Gabe groaned and pushed hair from his face, letting your legs fall off his hips down to the bed. "You know we can't let him found out. Not yet. We have no idea what kind of reaction he would have to us, based on how trigger happy he is now, my guess is it wouldn't be good." 

"I should have never tried to talk to him." You grumbled, rolling your eyes to stop tears from forming. "I just thought maybe some part of him would still want to be that guy who talks their enemy down, I really didn't think he'd immediately order everyone to start shooting. I still can't believe the way he looked at me, there was just so much... disgust." 

You tried. You tried so hard to tell Jack through your omnic voice that he just needed to trust you, that you were doing the right thing, that if he just let you work then there would be no point to trying to fight Talon. You almost broke when he raised his rifle, almost switched off your voice modulator to scream his name and make him recognize you. You almost did until you caught the glimmer of a gun at your side just in front of a black cowboy hat. Ugh, you were kicking yourself now, why did you say his name out loud? 'Jesse?' like some kind of lost fool seeing a ghost. In the smallest moment of distraction, Morrison must have fired as you realized just how many familiar faces were surrounding you. 

"Thanks for getting me out of there." You sighed as Gabe kissed softly at the bruises on your stomach. "I'm sorry for going to them even when you told me not to. I was just hoping maybe I could convince him we really are trying to help but-"

"We just need to keep our heads down, stay out off their radars. I can't lose you to bullets or prison when we've come this far." He was smiling but smoke was lifting from his shoulders, smoke that over the last two years and all the treatments Moira had pumped into him was becoming thicker and more erratic. He stumbled away from you hooking one hand over a balled fist and eyes shifting to black. "Shit- not now." 

"It's okay." You pushed yourself up to your feet, patting his chest as you shrugged the snow jacket back on. "I saw a little town on the island across from us. I'll go take the boat and get some supplies for the night. Leave the porch light on okay?" 

"I'm sorry." Gabe whispered in defeat as you lingered at the door looking in at him. 

"Don't be." You left with a smile, dropping it in the cold as you revved up the boat to head across the waters. 

His nightmares were only becoming worse with the treatments. Physically he was at his strongest, his smoke could move within a matter of seconds, his aim had gone from fairly accurate to rarely missing a target, even his mind was sharper with the ability to calculate probabilities unlike anything he'd ever done before. It also made him just a little more unhinged. Luckily he could feel it coming on, the undeniable urge to wrap his hand at your throat that cursed him to a point where he was practically immobile for anywhere from minutes to hours. It wasn't just an urge for you, his mind tortured him with the faces of familiar friends, Morrison, Ana, teammates from Blackwatch, but you- when he was fixated on you he became blinded. 

The worst part was, it wasn't the thought of him following through that made you leave. No, you'd encouraged him far too much to give in to the darkest parts of himself, just as he had stoked the flames of your anger. It was better to leave him alone when he was like this, the moments of confused emotions where he would easily slip away from the Gabe you knew and become a husk that filled you more with sadness than it did with fear. You could fight him off if you needed to, that was no great feat. What forced you to turn your back on him at times like that was purely the emotional toll of watching the man you loved so deeply wither into someone you no longer recognized. He liked it better that way too, then he wouldn't see the pity in your eyes when he came to.     

In the foggy distance, you could see his dark form pacing back and forth in front of the bedroom window getting smaller and smaller as you drifted away. At least cold northern weather gave you the ability to really hide your face, and a reason to cover yourself beneath layers to hide recognizable scars. You docked the boat just off a lazy little town lined with fish hatcheries and small businesses along a row of metal-sided buildings. Most of the hustle and bustle around you came from a fishing boat, men and omnics shouting at each other about something or other that had broken but one of them waved hello at you as you passed by into the general store with a sign outside missing some of its wood letterings. 

Armed with a wire handbasket and a dull colored scarf covering half your face, you wandered fluorescently lit aisles for toiletries and snacks that weren't as old as the MREs packed away for this trip. Tired townspeople paid you no attention as you passed the few you found in the store, something you were not used to after spending so long in giant compounds filled with faces that turned your way with every step. Here you felt invisible, here you were a ghost and you liked it that way. In the back of the store was a tiny candy section, all locally made, mostly imported nuts covered in dark chocolate, but at the very bottom in the corner was a row of indistinguishable colored gummy bears. With a smile, you tossed a bag of those as well as ingredients for Gabe's hot chocolate into the basket. 

"New here?" A cashier with deep wrinkles and a croaking voice asked as you patiently waited for her to scan your basket of things. 

"Yeah." You smiled at her. "We're moving onto a nearby island. It's nice up here." 

"We get a full restock of everything just before the end of October. Be sure to stock up before the ice caps freeze over and you can't take your boat anywhere. Our drones can't fly out the heavy stuff, no wood or anythin'." She spoke so bluntly it took you back, it was almost as if she's given the speech to far too many people far too many times before. "If you need anything we don't have the next store is 20 miles up the road, if you came by boat that means you're gonna have to walk it."

"Thanks." You awkwardly shifted on your feet. When Gabe said he wanted to make sure no one could find either of you, it seemed that also meant at certain times of the year you wouldn't be able to find anyone.

She told you more about the harsh winters, about locals to look out for and where to go to get other supplies. She was helpful, which was nice, but it also made you realize just how few people must come through each day if she had over fifteen minutes to talk your ear off after you'd already paid for your stuff. After you had a load of brown paper bags, you set off back towards the port. Gray clouds covered the sky with a threat of bad weather but that didn't stop you from climbing into the boat to head back to your shadow prowling across the walls. 

The trip to and back took almost two hours, you checked the time nervously hoping you'd given him enough space for his smoke to pass. A yellow porch light lit behind fog as you drifted up to your own worn down dock. You approached back with caution, listening intently on noises behind the door for anything telling you he was still experiencing terrible mental anguish. Hearing nothing, you pushed open the door to find Gabe down to fatigues stoking a fire in the black iron fireplace. His face lifted with a smile as he saw you, opening his arms to welcome you with a hug. Relieved to see his usual eyes and smokeless body, you set the bags on the floor at your side to wrap your arms at his neck. 

"All good here?" You mumbled before kissing the end of his nose. 

"Much better now that you're back." He pressed soft lips to yours and zipped your jacket off for you. "I was going to make us some food then start cleaning out the rooms, how does that sound?" 

"What a perfect housewife you are." You teased, kissing along the edge of his facial hair. 

"Ha. Ha." He sarcastically laughed, leaning forward to gently nip at your neck. He leaned back with a smug look. "And here I was, finally going to tell you how much I love you after all these years. Just had to ruin the moment, didn't you?"     

You squealed as he picked you up, tossing you over his shoulder only to drop you hard against the bed. You arched your back at him, blush rising to your cheeks heating them after the biting cold froze over your skin from the boat ride. He made you laugh as he riled you back up, hands pushing across cold skin, teasing you by unbuttoning the top of your pants then moving to kiss you softly. 

"Get into something comfy. I want you to relax while I do some work around here tonight, you can help me in the morning when those bruises are mostly healed." His voice was so sweet but he knew he was being a tease, especially by the way his fingers lingered just a little too long on the inside of your thigh. 

After you changed you laid down on the bed, thinking you were just going to close your eyes for a second, but your body had other plans. Days of travel and being overwhelmed with things finally coming together, the moment you steadied your breaht and shut your eyes long enough, sleep dragged you down faster than you could fight it away. 

With sleep came dreams. Dreams are bullshit.

One moment you were following a trail through Alaskan spruces, then in the blink of an eye you were in the thicket of some backwoods country. You were still in a forest, but it was the wrong one, your body refused to move faster, to run out from the trees and into safety. White signs were nailed to trunks, warnings to stay away, warnings that whoever you were there for was willing to kill. Warnings that you couldn’t read because all the letters were jumbled around, instead a familiar voice whispered them to you- Tishler’s voice mocked you with words of warning.

In a flash you were on the ground, struck down by an unseen force and crawling across thick underbrush. Your body was aching, especially the sharp pain in your shoulders. Gravity felt like it was magnetizing you to the ground as you tried to reach for a pair of cowboy boot clad feet far enough that they were just out of reach.

You tried to open your mouth, tried to scream but only smoke poured out. Thick black smoke, Gabe’s smoke choking you from the inside out. You couldn’t breathe as it wrapped and coated your throat, you couldn’t move as it forced you to reject everything in your body.

Hands.

Hands pushed over sensitive skin until your body was limp and someone was lifting you. To them it was nothing, you felt as if you were being pulled to the very center of the earth, but they lifted you as if you were lighter than air. Commander blue, you were wrapped in a commander blue jacket, but this memory was getting fuzzy. You lifted eyes to see Gabe taking you from the forest.

“That’s not right.” You wondered aloud to yourself, black smoke spilling from your lips and mixing with a blazing forest fire.

He didn’t say anything, only smirked. You watched a trail of red blood creep from his nostril, down into his goatee and over his lips. You could feel your body breaking out in a cold sweat as you reached for it, trying to touch the blood, only for him to pull away and slow his pace. He stared at you, eyes shifting to all black before carefully lowering you from his hold. Still in a forest, your feet somehow landed in warm sand. As you stared down at toes curling in the nonexistent beach, drops of blood landed near your feet, Gabe’s body pressed closer to yous.        

“Stay with me.” Gabe said, gentle eyes glistening against the light of flames. His lips fell to your neck lazily, words nothing more than a hushed whisper. “I’ve got you.”   

“That’s not-” You were gasping through smoke. “ _You’ve_ never said that to me-”

“Stay with me. Stay with me. Stay wi-”

“No. No, those are Jack’s words-”

His kissing sent you crashing to the ground, you fell hard against the forest floor of sand and loose nails only to be staring up at the roof of a metal plane you’d spent too many nights in. Your usual fold out cot on the wall of the plane replaced by an examination table, your wrists strapped down as Max loomed over you with a screwdriver in one hand and a wine glass in the other.

“I was kind to you.” You pleaded, but his expression never changed. “I’m sorry, I was only doing what I needed to do.”

The screwdriver plunged into your side, a white hot pain shocked you enough to wake you.

As you sat up in a breathless gasp you grabbed for your side, fingernails digging into your shirt and clutching at phantom pain. Gabe’s side of the bed was empty, dim light on in the living room told you he was still working on something. You made every effort to appear as if you weren’t waking from a nightmare, wiped cold sweat from your forehead and forced your hands to steady before you quietly slipped from the bed to the door looking in at him.

“Too cold?” Gabe’s voice was soft as he looked up to you joining him on the dusty old couch.

“Can’t sleep.” You stared into the low burning fireplace, eyes heavy but mind sharply awake.

There was a feeling of deja vu, of entering his room on the base years ago in the middle of the night in tears. Dressed in a shirt three times too big for you, shorts that showed off your legs, Gabe was waiting for you on the couch, it was a small comfort but it made your heart warm.

“Want some hot chocolate?” _His smile._ You’d give anything to see him smile like this all the time.

“Hm.” You slid into the seat next to him, flopping over so your head was in his lap and your legs hung off the armrests. He was clearly exhausted from the trip up, but he was preoccupied by documents open on a glowing screen. Content just to watch him smirk with a happiness only you could see, you wiggled against him on the couch, making a show of getting comfortable. “Not right now. I'm still a little groggy from an unexpected nap.”

"I thought you'd definitely be out the rest of the night, you usually are after long flights." 

"I had another one of those nightmares that woke me up." 

"At least you weren't sleepwalking this time. Scared the shit out of me when I saw you wandering the halls without your mask that one time." 

"You and me both." You sighed, picking at your cuticles with chipped nails. As Gabe grew stronger, you almost felt as if you were going just a little crazier every day. 

Once you were living out here all your stress would go away, you told yourself. Only a little longer and you wouldn't be on a verge of screaming about how annoyed you were with Overwatch every second of every day. Gabe pushed at your chin with careful fingers, lifting your gaze to him and his worried expression. 

"You're so strong. Just a little longer and we're done with everything." His thumb rubbed against your cheek, a gentle caress that had you curling your face against him. "We have a few days here before we head back, I know it's hard but try to relax, okay? We're almost there." 

"What are you doing right now?" You managed a small smile, pretending like you were putting the looming end Talon at the back of your mind. 

"Checking the final roster to ensure any remaining agents will be captured and in custody before we ignite the building. Moira's working on the headcount right now, it should update within the next couple hours." 

"Boring." You teased, arching your back at him. "You can't tell me to relax then still be working. You have to put that away too." 

"Well, look at you. So demanding all the sudden." 

He smirked and you saw the same expression of the man who used to steal your fries in the commissary, the same man whose eyes lit to life with each one you took. As you held your breath, his hand slipped beneath the neckline of your shirt, fingers curling around your chest to grab you before pinching at soft nipples. The way he touched you made you squirm against the couch, you lips hang open in a silent beg for more, but you wanted to see where he would take it without you prompting him.

With a sigh, he dropped his head back. No longer gluing his eyes to the way his fingers rolled against your chest, allowing himself to get lost in the feeling of you and the needy breaths you were holding back. With every touch he was lighting your skin, sending a heat through your veins that had you blushing just as if he was touching you the first time. Behind your head you felt a jump in his lap, a growing pressure that made your cheeks burn.

“I wish I could have done this back with Overwatch.” He chuckled with his voice to the ceiling, hand pulling from your shirt only to slide down your body between your thighs. Fingertips pressed against you through your shorts, your legs squeezed together around him as a writhing moan left you. “All those nights you were just a few feet away from me, I wanted you so bad.”

"You were always there when I needed you, Commander Reyes." Your voice was breathless, but he took the hint as he heard you refer to him by a title he no longer held. "I wish I realized that sooner." 

As one hand pushed at the waistband of your shorts, his other curled into your hair holding you gently but firmly enough that he could lock your gaze with his. Eyes burning and unwavering, he studied your every squirm as fingers trailed over your slit. When you moved too much, he pulled harder at the base of your hair, silently telling you to watch him as he worked beneath your panties. Your mouth hung open, soft gasps leaving you as a think finger pushed past your entrance and curled deep in you until he was making you catch yourself. Your fingers wrapped around his strong forearm, keeping him exactly where you wanted him to be, working fingers at your core until you were a shaking mess. 

One finger became two, two curled and opened you, bringing you to the verge with every knowing movement. Still, he held your hair in a fist and forced eye contact with you, even as you whispered pleas for him to go faster, to give you what you were chasing after, he maintained a slow and deep pace that drove you crazy. What made you even hotter, what made you work your hips even harder against his hand was knowing just how hard he was pressing against his pants at the back of your head in his lap. You knew he absolutely wanted you to touch him too, that he would give anything to have you hopping into his lap and take him then and there, but watching you come completely undone with just two fingers made him feel so much more powerful than anything else in the world. 

He worked you so long, denying you so much that you were almost in tears. Your entire body buzzed with desire, just one right move and you'd be screaming his name and squeezing thighs around him, but he wanted so much more than that from you. 

"Please- please Gabe, I can't- I can't take much more of this." You begged him, chest exposed with your shirt pulled up and his hand working hard at the front of your shorts. "I'm so close." 

"I really don't think you are." He purred out, a smile on his lips. "You look so good like this." 

"Fuck!" You screamed as his fingers pressed hard to a sensitive spot on your walls. 

His hand in your hair moved to pet you, fingers combing through in a comforting motion but it only made you all the needier. Your body was beyond frustrated, desperately in need of release. You were so ready, wanting him so badly that tears formed at the corners of your eyes, dropping from your cheeks in a pent up emotional release as he continued working you open. 

"Good tears or bad tears?" His voice became gentler. 

"Good." You sobbed out. 

"Oh, look at you." His rough hand slowed before it left your shorts all together. "Come here." 

Too strong for your practically jelly body, there was no resistance as he scooped you up, removing your panties and placed your legs on either side of his. Knowing exactly what you wanted he released himself from his pants, rutting himself against your soaked slit. He sighed as his lips fell to your tear stained cheeks, kisses covering your crying and begging for him. Big hands curled at your back, fingernails digging into your skin beneath the oversized shirt as he felt his tip twitching at your entrance and tasted your frustration for him on his tongue.      

As he pushed into you, your tears became happy sobs. He was still so large, pushing at every nerve and working you wide, but your body had grown mostly accustomed to him. All too happy to be filled, you sank against his lap as your hands clawed into his hair. You could feel every inch of him, throbbing deep on you having teased himself almost as much as he had teased you, he was silently edging himself waiting for the moment he would have you in his lap. 

"You're all mine." He growled against your cheek, fingers holding you hard. 

"I love you Gabriel." You whispered in the heat of the moment, kissing at his forehead as he bounced beneath you. 

This declaration only made him snap harder into you. Even though you'd let it slip a few times, even though you knew he loved you too, he'd refused to outright say it. You blamed it on the fear of losing you to his own hands, on the gnawing voice in the back of his head that probably told him you still had feelings for a blond fighting against you. Whatever his reasons were, you tried to respect his hesitation, tried to be patient with his beating around the bush of 'one day I'll tell you how much I love you', or his dodging by kissing you instead. 

Already too close, he chose to suck hard at the front of your neck the moment you moaned his name and spilled over with walls squeezing every inch of him. Your body seized up, nails digging into his hair only making him groan in a mix of pleasure and pain before he held each hip hard and bounced you against him to chase his own high. You were still riding out your own, long overdue and much needed, your body was twitching around him as you felt deep pulses within you. Evaded whispers pressed against your face with lingering kisses, his lips catching final tears crying just for him. 

Limp and catching your breath in his lap, his arms still held you loosely in a gentle hug. At the front of your throat, you could feel a large hickey forming as claw marks surfaced on the back of his neck. The moments of quiet afterward, that moment of a fireplace crackling and his breathing slowing with his heartbeat. Unable to move or do much else, you kissed at the exposed skin of his neck, nose tickling him each time you nuzzled against him. He was still buried in you, soft and no longer in a moment of passion, but the feeling of love you knew was shared between you, an absolute trust could be felt in the air.

"I think I'm going to make you that hot chocolate." 

With a kiss to your cheek, he wrapped his arms around you tight and flipped you around so you were resting with your back to the couch. Before he left he kissed at your hips, down your thighs and to your knees where he rubbed his face against you as he pulled ruined shorts back over your body. You sighed and ran your fingers through his curls, melting into the warmth of the nearby fireplace.

"Stay here." He kissed at your ankle before finally you heard the shifting of flannel pajama pants and a low groan as he pushed himself from the floor. A rush of freezing air hit your back making you arch in surprise before a wool blanket landed over your body. 

“When it’s just us and we have all the time in the world, what do you want to do while we’re here?” You asked him as you settled beneath it.

“I think I’ll pick up guitar again.”

“Again?” You laughed.

“Knew how to play when I was younger. Think I still know the basics, but it’s been a while. We could learn together.” There was a smile on his voice as he rummaged through the rustic kitchen. 

"Sure." A chuckle left you as you stared into the fire, the image of him slaving away in front of a sewing machine you could conjure up in a second, but him picking away at a guitar just seemed downright silly. "We should get a dog or something. An omnic one, maybe."

"Anything you want." Pots and pans clattered around as he laughed. "Dammit, looks like the only pans here are old. Another thing to add to our list of stuff we're going to need before we officially move in." 

As he whipped up his infamous hot chocolate, you thumbed through the report he'd been looking at while you were sleeping. The agents left made you nervous, they were the ones most dedicated to the organization, ones that stayed even after all their leaders were dead or gone. They wouldn't go down without a fight and that unsettled your stomach. You almost wanted to just stay here forever, never go back to Italy or Talon, just hide out here for the rest of your days, but you knew that was an impossibility when you were so close to finishing what you'd started. You could get used to the happiness you felt at that Alaskan home, to the sounds a pot simmering in the kitchen with mixed ingredients and the sight of Gabe moving without the weight of the world on his shoulders.

As he finished, he brought you the drink and placed a kiss on the top of your head over the edge of the couch. He combed his fingers through the top of your hair, pushing it from your face so he could see pinked cheeks. It was there, over steaming tin mugs on a snowy afternoon where the forest behind the house was quiet and the windows were frosting over, Gabe looked to you with such soft eyes and a small smile.

“I love you more than you love gummy bears.”

“What?” You laughed turning to him, mind not quite clicking yet with what he’d said.

“I love you more than this hot chocolate, which is a lot. More than the feeling of free-falling in the plane. I love you more than the moon loves the ocean, more than thunder loves the lighting. I love you more than the blood that pumps through my veins to keep me alive because _you_ have done more for me than my body ever has. I’ll love you till the end of the earth and back again then another lap around if I have to run it every day. I loved you when I begged you to kill me, I loved you every night you came to my room, I loved you when I made you run laps in the rain even if at the time I didn’t even know it. Every time I see you I fall further and further in love with you, and I will continue to love you more every day with you here at my side, even when we have bad days, even when we’re old and senile, even if eventually I… I just love you. Even now, I know I don’t deserve you but I’m so thankful you left with me. I fucking love you.”

You couldn’t form words. Instead, you were pressing knuckles to your lips as happy sobs started. Sure, you knew he loved you, but it was a whole other feeling to finally hear him say it out loud in a way that wasn’t just to tease you or pull you along. He said it with such sincerity, with a voice that was unlike his commander or Reaper tones, a voice just for you. He loved you, loved you beyond a super soldier bond, beyond becoming wanted criminals together. He loved you, all of you completely, even the parts that no one should, and that was enough. 

* * *

Those few days you had with him all to yourself you spent making the most of it. 

Walking hand in hand through a makeshift snowy trail behind the house that led deep into a wooded area with trees so thick snow didn't even reach the dirt below. Sitting on the old wood doc on clear afternoons next to the rocky shore that led to the house, overlooking a calm cold ocean and far away boats motoring from island to island. Together you completely scrubbed down the kitchen and made your way over to the store on the island across from you, making Gabe carry a box of new pots and pans all the way back to the boat from the store further inland. It was a glimpse, a happy glimpse, of a life you were so close to tasting. It was a quiet life. A simple life. A life where you and Gabe could have grown old together and died together without the entire world knowing either of you had ever lived beyond the expiration date Overwatch had set. 

Your final morning there was a cold one, clouds hung heavy in the sky with a brilliant pink sunrise spreading over distant tree lined islands. You were sat on the rocky shoreline, comfortably wrapped in the old wool blanket just enjoying the view across calm sea water when Gabe tapped your shoulder. WIth a serious face, he handed you a screen projecting an ATLAS News article. Already knowing it was bad news, you held it close to your body and skimmed the headline. Gabe grunted, sitting behind you and cuddling up to your back as you read through it and through the interviews with familiar names from Overwatch. 

“He hates us.” You sighed quietly as you finished the article, setting the screen on the freezing rock at your side.

“Jack hates _Reaper and Lightning_.” Gabe’s arm circled to the front of you, holding you close to his body and you almost melted against him trying to cling onto any happiness in the moment you could. “He doesn't hate us, he hates _them_. Once we’re done and everything has settled we can come up here and hide away for a while. We’ll give them some time, we’ll lose the identities, we’ll start over again. We can do exactly what we did before, start over completely. We never have to be those people again. Maybe one day we’ll join Overwatch again, when we’re ready.” 

“That might be a long time for me, Gabe.” You shifted, craning your neck to twist and meet his eyes. 

“Only if you want to. I’m more than happy to live out the rest of our lives here. It would be a nice change of pace to be somewhere quiet.” He had a small smile beneath his thick facial hair, the smile looked like it was weighing him down before he leaned against you and placed a warm kiss to your cheek. 

You had to finish what you started, otherwise, what was the point? You don’t even know how many people you’d killed or reprogrammed. You’d destroyed life after countless life in the name of meeting a goal that in theory was simple, but in practice was messy. Your actions, your decisions, the things you’ve done to get to this point- to someone you were the bad guy. You were their boogeyman, the shadow that kept children up at night right alongside Reaper’s. In the end what you were doing was good, you knew that, but the world didn’t.  

With a heavy sigh, blinking away the tears of someone weaker, you leaned against him to place a kiss to the tip of his nose. He hugged you as tight as he could.

“Let’s get this over with.” 


	15. The Tragedy Of Gabriel Reyes

Traveling back to base took more than just a simple boat ride between islands. Gabe’s plane hid in a private hangar deep in Alaskan woods, from the cabin on the coastline it was a boat ride on an icy ocean and a long drive into the forest just to reach it, but you knew at the very least no one would ever find it there. After the journey to the plane, Gabe wrapped you up in a warm wool blanket and made the fold out cot as comfortable as possible for the long flight back to base. He made you giggle with the way his curls flopped around on top of his head and how he kissed the tip of your nose and blushing cheeks. 

“Try to get some sleep.” He ran a hand through your hair, laying it on the pillow beneath your head. “It’s a long flight to Rialto. Dream about coming back home.” 

“Remember to turn on communications once we’re up again. I'm sure our lieutenants will have something to report after we were gone for a few days.” You reminded him with a smile and a kiss to the inside of his wrist. 

Turning to your side, you closed your eyes hoping to dream about your home waiting for you on the freezing coast, but you knew better than to believe that you’d dream of anything other than tragedies and smoke. Your body stiffened as the plane lurched up, lifting to the skies with a roaring engine that loudly lulled you to sleep. With sleep came dreams, nightmares that although were nowhere near the caliber of the ones that kept Gabe awake at night, still haunted you.  

Your mind swirled with forest fire, with the blood of a man who you’d taken all too much pleasure in killing. Dreams with Max hurt you the most, your mind would torture you with replays of reprogramming him. Cutting between red wries only for dark blood to spill out over your feet and still he would be calm accepting his fate. You'd frantically try to piece him back together, try to patch together quickly appearing bullet holes in his omnic body but nothing would ever save him. Others you would chase voicelessly after Arntz, never able to catch up to hard light legs until a shadowy figure would appear from nothing and crack her neck with a noise that would beat against your eardrums for hours. Sometimes you would catch her, only to drive a knife into the soft center of her throat forcing her to meet the same fate as her maniacal lover. These night terrors clouded your brain, shutting off your ability to even attempt to wake yourself. 

While you slept on the plane, your mind tormented you with visions of what could be. Of chasing after a cabin deep in a forest and a ground soft with spilled blood. You ran and ran and ran as fast as you could but nothing would move. That's where you were trapped, your brain locked on an endless loop where it all began. Surrounded with dense trees, there was a break between trunks in the forest that almost blinded you with a bright white light.

A flash of light your mind believed was a mine exploding startled you awake, only to find you were sitting in the copilot's chair as Gabe angrily spoke into the headset. 

You blinked at the bright sunlight pouring in through the windshield, squinting your eyes as they adjusted to being suddenly awake confused if you'd moved yourself there in your sleep or if he sat you next to him. Hours you must have been out, even after such restless sleep of nightmares you could hear in his voice that something was wrong and you needed to pull yourself together fast. Your entire head felt like it was pounding, you opened your jaw and popped your ears to ease the pressure from being so high in the air. Adjusting in your seat you reached for your own headset, listening in on whatever it was that had Gabe so riled up. 

“Reaper, sir, it’s worse than we thought.” An agents voice crackled over the plane radio. “Intelligence indicates Overwatch agents are planning an infiltration of Doctor O’Deorain’s off site lab. We’ve been trying to reach her for the last hour but her lab doors are locked, we believe she may be running an experiment and none of her agents can reach her. You’re about an hour from her location, the closest Talon agents are two hours away. It is our belief Overwatch is gathering and readying their troops.” 

“Shit.” You breathed out, turning to Gabe.

Moira had taken over Tishler’s lab at his home in Scotland, although a horrifyingly creepy place that boasted labs deep below ground of an old brick style home, it was the only lab she could continue her personal research after new laws were passed making it much harder for her to get away with her morally gray experiments. If Overwatch was moving in on Moira that means they must have some sort of evidence on her for her involvement with Talon and reprogramming former agents. She had been making more mistakes lately, her role with Talon reduced to something she loathed now although she knew it was necessary- something must have slipped through the cracks.

Your heart was pounding. Overwatch can't charge her, not yet, not when you needed Moira there for the final steps and she was so close to freedom. 

“Put all agents on high alert, advise the ones at her location they have my permission to interrupt the experiment- break down the lab doors if you have to. I’m changing our flight path now, Lightning and I will check it out. Send in anyone you can as backup, just in case. We can’t risk this being a false alarm. If they think they’re going after a leader of Talon that means they’re going to be pulling out all the stops they can. Prepare for a firefight with the best they have, they will not send rookies for this.” 

“Understood. All lines are open and waiting for your orders as you land, sir.”    

You were chewing at your cuticles, nerves flipping your stomach over and over again at the thought of Overwatch apprehending Moira. As stoic as she was, as much as she seemed distant over early morning coffee and distracted during late night conversations, you could see the toll her own body was taking from the stress of bringing Talon down. Veins from her left eye had grown uncontrollable, dark purple veins splintering off up her forehead and down over her cheek beneath dark circles of exhaustion. She’d ignored your worried questions and left her arm to rot, tips of her fingers practically black with purple following down her skin far past her elbow, only to pop with more dark veins all across her skin. She wasn’t taking care of herself, in fact, she was continually making her own symptoms worse as she tried to experiment serums in her own blood- serums that at one point she would have tested on you knowing your super soldier enhanced genes could withstand it.    

She kept quiet about it but you knew her research had shifted. No longer was she working on perfecting a reprogramming drug, that study was long since completed and in practice as an almost daily part of her job. Now her mind occupied with theories of inserting false memories to override ones people would rather forget. What worried you was the gnawing doubt that she'd attempted one of these on one of the agents who should have been reprogrammed to forget anything with Talon, a fear sat in your stomach that she'd attempted to insert a new memory and it failed, causing that agent to remember everything and blab to Overwatch officials.

Even if she had, even if she'd slipped up, you would do everything in your power to protect her. As controversial as her work was, she continued to work towards things she believed would better the world in some sick way, but she knew the devastating effects it had on failed test subjects. She was your friend and you were going to make damn sure she came out of this unscathed.   

“If Overwatch is trying to get Moira, it's likely Jack will be there.” Gabe sunk into his chair, dulled eyes staring straight ahead at the sky. “Keep your guard up, don’t get lost if you see him. Our only goal is to make sure Moira is safe, get her on the ship, and get back to Italy. We can’t get distracted now.”

"I won't." Your face was stern, sheened in a cold sweat of nightmares as you held out your palm to him. 

He slapped his hand in yours, fingers locking together and holding tight. As your hands fell in the air, hanging together between the pilot's and copilot's seats, you stared out into the wide open sky at an all too familiar blue that made your mouth dry and your heart race.

Don't get distracted. Don't lose your cool. Don't focus on a love that was cut off at the knees. Don't think about him crumpled on the floor of his farmhouse, bleeding out from a gunshot wound. Don't react when you see his familiar face. Don't be anything but the perfect soldier.   

"You look worried." Gabe's voice was no longer speaking in gritting commander tones, instead it was gentle. " I'm nervous to see him again too, you won't be alone out there. Just listen to my orders. His fighting style has become so much more aggressive, but he's still predictable. If he's there for Moira he'll focus on her even if he knows we're there, he'll only try to fight or capture us if Moira escapes capture. His mission is always his first priority." 

You nodded, chewing at the corner of your lips. This feeling sat at the base of your stomach anchoring you to the chair. Not nervousness, not worry or bitterness. It was that feeling of doom that rests in the back of your throat, it was a symphony of violins swelling in your eardrums that warned you to turn the plane around and head back to Alaska. That gut feeling that told you everything you were about to do was a mistake, that the cracks in glass bones were just one punch away from breaking.

The beginning of the end had already started and landing that plane in the grassy field behind Tishler's old home was the winding up to the most powerful blow you'd ever receive.   

* * *

"If I stop this procedure now we risk leaving this test subject brain dead." Moira snarled out at you and Gabe from her stool next to an unconscious body. 

"We need to get you to a safe location immediately, our agents believe you're being surrounded even as we speak. We're waiting on backup if we need it, but we need to move _now_ Moira. Overwatch agents likely saw us land and know we're aware of their presence in the city which means they could attack at any moment." Gabe had his Reaper mask lifted to speak only to her as you guarded the smashed in heavy metal lab doors. 

They bickered back and forth as you listened in to the chatter between Talon agents through your earpiece while running security details on the hacking screen in your helmet. The feeling still sat unsettled in your stomach, floating around like smoke but you forced yourself to think past it. Moira only had five agents with her, you'd ordered them to spread out across the manor watching for any signs of a potential attack. With a simple motion, you flicked on your voice modulator and spoke over your earpiece.  

"Agents, check in." Your omnic voice still freaked you out sometimes, it was too convincing. 

"Roof clear." 

"Quadrant one clear."  

"Quadrant two clear." 

Silence. 

"Quadrant three, check in." You growled, fists balling at your side. 

Silence, still. 

 _Shit._ Your eyes frantically searched the map of the estate. Quadrant three, which one was quadrant three- the lower back section of the house, quadrant three was your only clear path back to the plane. Moira and Gabe were still arguing, she was adjusting electroshocks on the forehead of the person at her station. You turned into the room to make sure they could hear you asking again.

"Quadrant three, check in. Are you there?"

Gabe and Moira froze to look at you, Moira's eyes were bloodshot and wild, Gabe quickly snapped his mask back in place readying for action. You threw an earpiece at Moira in the brief moment of silence waiting for a response.  

"Three's clear, over." Came a voice so familiar that it almost ruined you, but it wasn't one you should have heard in your Talon comm line. None of your agents spoke as if they had something in their mouth. You froze trying to place the voice, it wasn't until Gabe balled his fists and snapped into smoke heading straight for the doors that it hit you. That slight southern drawl gave it away. 

"Quadrant four?" You asked, playing along for now.

"Quadrant four clear." Came an unsure voice, you knew the agent didn't recognize who was reporting in at three either. "Ma'am-" 

"All clear, team stay at your stations." As you spoke you typed out encrypted messages with your hacking gloves, advising the four agents you did recognize to converge at your location, you were under attack. Moira sat at the stool next to her test subject, face distant and disheartened about leaving them in such a state. "We need to go. Your life is at risk Moira, you have to leave him behind." She didn't move, long nails rested on the chest of the man breathing shallowly in his drugged unconscious state. "I will drag you out of here myself if I have to." 

"There's no need for threats, I'm coming." She stood, straightening out her lab coat and pushing hair that had grown out ever so slightly back from her face. 

As you ran with her out the doors, towards the compromised area only stopping for her to grab her gear- a makeshift weapon that acted almost like a gas to make enemies sick. At the very least you were happy she would be able to protect herself if she needed to, but you ran with your gun in front of you held low just in case someone had slipped past Gabe into the estate. You didn't run at your full speed, instead keeping it to a pace that her long legs would be able to keep up behind you. The other agents joined as you moved towards the center of the home, joining Gabe who was half smoke curled around a door frame. Once you had your agents and Moira you remotely changed the comm channel as Gabe snapped back solid, dropping his voice to a whisper. 

"Twelve agents so far. The director, three leads, teams of three agents with each of them. Reinhardt and three agents are surrounding the plane, two teams are sweeping the house, and the director's team is holding back. We need to get out the front and approach the plane from the back if we want this to end without a fight." As Reaper, Gabe pointed to the long hall leading to the front door. "You two out the door first, check for any signs of agents in the front. Lightning, Dr. O'Deorain, I'll escort you once we get the okay that it's clear. My remaining two agents, keep an eye on the Overwatch agents sweeping the house then follow us. If Director Morrison moves let me know immediately." 

"Sir!" The agents confirmed in a yelled whisper. Two agents sprung into action, keeping low out of sight low to the floor as they hurried out the door. Gabe turned back to you. 

"If there's no one out front then we know they're here with a limited number of people. We need to keep this quiet, backup won't be here for another half hour or so." 

"I understand." Your heart was in your throat. With a gentle touch to his arm, you leaned in close. "You said Jack, Reinhardt, and Jesse are all here. Did you recognize anyone else?" 

"Ana, Genji, a couple of former Blackwatch agents. They're bringing in their best. I'm starting to think this wasn't just an op to get Moira. If it was just her they wouldn't need this many of their top agents." He paused, looking back towards the doors. "I think they knew we'd come to protect her. There's a lot of firepower, a lot of people who are the best at what they do. I think they were planning to lure us out here, I don't think they're just after Moira. I feel so stupid, they probably weren't moving in on her until they got confirmation we were here, they wanted  _us_."

"This isn't good. We don't have all of our weapons, I don't have my programs ready-" 

"Do you remember the rules I gave you when we joined Talon?" His voice was stern. "Never leave my sight. Don't fight unless you have to. Don't speak unless absolutely necessary. I need you to follow those right now. Keep a level head and we're getting out of this."

"I also need you to trust me." You sucked in a breath. Focus. You had to focus. You needed to get an upper hand in this before Overwatch agents reached you, your hands were shaking but agents on your earpiece rang out that the coast was clear out front. "Start heading out with Moira, I'm going to see if I can get into their communications line."

"You have three minutes. If you can't get it in three minutes I need you out of this house and following my location." He nodded, motioning for Moira to come wait by the door with him. 

You could do this. You just had to breathe. You could feel the eyes of the Talon agents on you, of Gabe and Moira holding their breath the whole time you typed into the air with hacking gloves. You already had an advantage, one the Overwatch agents would never see coming- you already knew how they would set everything up. You knew their tricks, you knew their emergency codes, even if the original base had been blown to smithereens it was just human to get lazy and use the same old thing again. The trick was remembering all the old strings of code for those lines you once helped make secure. 

Seconds were ticking down in the vision of your helmet, you were either rusty with their systems or they had actually improved the security of their lines enough for this to be a challenge. Hushed voices were slowly getting closer as the rooms around you were being swept, Moira was getting antsy with her hand shaking as it waited to push the front door open and run for her life.

Nerves were getting the better of you, your teeth were grinding together. One minute left. 

It seemed impossible with how much your palms were sweating. You should have grabbed more weapons from the plane, should have been more prepared than this, but you were too busy being distracted at the thought of seeing Morrison again.

Voices were too close now, you could hear them shuffling on the other side of the walls, there was no way you were getting in there-

"This section is clear." _Ana._

"Understood, Director Morrison and team moving in." Another agents voice followed with an army of steps entering in through the back patio. 

"Team, spread out and search the remainder of the house. They likely already know we're in the home, be prepared to put up a fight at any moment. Lethal force is permitted on any and all Talon agents." Morrison and his commander voice.

You sucked in a breath, you needed to get out of there _now_.

You signaled to Gabe and Moira that you had what you needed and they threw the door open leaving in a silent fury. Taking off after them, the two Talon agents at your side ran behind you with weapons drawn ready to hold off any attacks if anyone heard you running. Gabe seemed to be heading through the streets around the estate, weaving through homes condemned for reconstruction that laid silent and broken for cover. His plan involved skimming around the homes on the edge of the property that backed up to the massive grass field just behind the estate so he could smoke into the plane, get it in the air and drop a line for you and your team to get into the plane with as he flew you to safety. It was risky, but he knew you didn't want a fight, and you thought a little part of him also didn't want to hurt his former friends. 

As you ran, footsteps on the other side of the wall paused.

A loud thud burst into the hall, crashing open a door just in time for the front door to slam shut behind you. Shouting and heavy running stampeded inside the home as you sprinted down an uneven cobblestone sidewalk into the neighboring buildings that all looked as if they could collapse on themselves at any moment. Gabe and Moira were already far enough ahead that they could slip away unnoticed, but you were not as lucky.    

"Sir, three agents are running from the front of the property! Looked like two fighters and Lightening." 

"Amateurs. Continue to search the home, my team will head out and personally check this out." Morrison's voice was so gruff, it actually sent a just of fear through your heart. 

"Shit, we're about to have company. They spotted us. Morrison and his team are coming out after us, some are staying to search." You huffed into your own earpiece. With a nervous breath, you turned to your two Talon agents. "Do not come with me, split up and hide as far from the house as you can get. Stay silent and I'll draw them to me so you can escort Reaper and O'Deorain to the plane. If they find you, do not fight." 

"Understood, ma'am." 

"And stop calling me ma'am." 

They nodded, splintering off in different directions as you ran as fast as you could, far from the estate in the opposite direction. 

"Where are you going?" Gabe's voice curled in your ear. 

"Get Moira to the plane, I won't fight but I'm going to draw their attention so most of you can get to safety. Once you are all at the plane I'll head to the church at the end of the street, the one with that tall belltower if you can see it, you can throw down the line there and I'll catch it. Just get everyone else out of here."

"I told you I wasn't going to leave you alone out here!" There was an anger in his voice that you recognized, one that you knew meant his eyes would be turning to black if he didn't compose himself. "I told you not to leave my sight-"

"If I come to you I'm only giving them exactly what they want. We don't have time to argue, I need you to trust me on this. I'm making the right call and you know it. After all we've been through can't you trust me when I tell you I know this is what we need to do?" Your lungs were starting to hurt from the running, you knew Morrison would be hot on your trail and that he was fast, but you hoped his prior injuries would slow him down enough to give you more time. 

"I trust she's doing the best she can for her circumstances, Reaper." Moira's monotone voice came over the headset. You sighed, thankful she finally spoke up to defend you. 

"Do not engage with him, do you understand me? That is an order." Gabe's voice was just as deadly as he was. "Make your way to the church and keep your eyes on the sky. Good luck, Lightning." 

You shook off your nerves, assessing the area around you now that Gabe had your back with your impromptu plan. Echos of running feet were following you somewhere down the road, he was coming and you had to prepare yourself. Breathe. Ignore the twisting in your stomach. Ignore the history of minefields and farmhouses, of times when you would chase after people just like you. Running only afforded you glances over your shoulder to them. They were just distant indistinct shapes at first, shadowed bodies with drawn weapons running from the shadows into the bright sunlight of day. Then they became clearer, clad in a familiar blue and in a tight formation, the first thing you saw was the distant glimmer of blond hair and a long blue jacket. 

"Hey, poster boy! Over here!" You screamed with your omnic voice, drawing their attention. Guns raised, pointing at you, one with a red light of sight that circled over your heart on your black armor. 

"Lightning spotted, do not fire. Try to take her alive if we can. Does anyone have eyes on the two agents she was seen escaping with?"

"Negative, sir."

"Amari, McCree, have you found anyone else in the home?" As he spoke into the headpiece, he stood far at the end of the road staring at you, waiting.

"Found a man here in the basement, he ain't lookin' too hot. No sign of enemies though." Jesse, _god_ hearing him felt like a knife to the chest. "Looks like they left in a hurry. I think they're fleein'."

You watched the group of Overwatch agents as you stood in silence, the breeze around you blew tiny green leaves at your feet, swirling around at your feet like the center of a storm. It would have killed you to stand here like this and not hear him talk back, to wonder what he was waiting on, but luckily you'd broken into their communications lines. Morrison turned to his team, facing away from you. 

"She's fast, considered armed and dangerous. Give me your cuffs, we're going to try to bring her in alive so she can be tried with the UN, but if she tries anything take her down. This is either a capture or kill mission, she can not get away." In the distance, Morrison turned back to you. "Stay alert, Reaper is likely closeby with the other Talon agents. Draw your weapons."

"Oh come on, it doesn't have to be like this." You yelled through a fake laugh as you threw your hands in the air. The nearest cover was a sprint away but with three agents and Morrison aiming at you, it was very unlikely you'd run away from them unharmed. You'd have to be smart about this. "You can put your guns down, I don't want a fight." 

"Where's Reaper?" Morrison shouted at you, taking just a few slow steps closer. 

"He left without me. That's the problem with working with criminals, they'll turn on their allies the moment they see trouble." You carefully tried to inch your feet back. 

"Don't. Move." Morrison shouted as his gun raised to his sights. "I won't ask again, where is Reaper? He must have left with O'Deorain. Cooperate with us and maybe you won't be killed." 

"He's-" You froze, even from far away you could see the anger on his face. You needed to come up with something believable. "They went to a safe house in the city center, I can take you to it!" 

Had your heart ever beat like this before? It felt like it wasn't sure if it wanted to beat fast or slow, it couldn't stop fluttering at the fear of dying to a man you used to love. He was getting too close, still far away but steadily coming at you and it was making you lose your nerve. You wondered if he could see you shaking, it sure felt like he could. 

"Take your gloves off and put your hands back in the air." He demanded. 

No, that was the one thing you couldn't do. He'd traced your scars too many times, kissed your arm up and down and at every angle enough for you to know he would have no doubt if you took them off. Having him know who you were was your worst case scenario. Whatever you were going to do, you needed to make a quick decision, the closer he got the worse it was going to get and you were on the verge of outright panic. 

"Fuck." You muttered to yourself before joining Gabe's communication line again. "You're about to hear gunshots but I'm okay. Keep going." 

"What-?!" His voice growled in your ear and you turned as fast on your heel as you could running straight into one of the abandoned houses.  

"She's on the move, fire!" 

Gunshots. Too many to count or try to dodge, you just ran and hoped for the best. One definitely made contact with the armor on your back as it split with an audible crack, but you knew better than to stop moving. Bullets struck wood beams around you, sending splinters flying into the air at each side and the house into a creaking mess. Abandoned furniture rested on the ground as an obstacle running from home to home using decaying wood and fallen bricks as cover. Morrison was faster than his team, jumping over beams and supports with no effort as his team fell behind struggling to get around them. He was still agile, still able to keep up with your speed- still a super soldier. 

"You can't run from me anymore!" He barked at you with such anger in his voice. "You're going to pay for everything you've done!" 

Run, run as fast as you fucking can. Your legs hurt, your whole body was shaking. His team had fallen so far behind you couldn't even see them anymore. You were almost to the edge of the neighborhood, almost to the church miles from the estate and far from putting Gabe or Moira in Morrison's sights. You'd managed to duck in and out of houses, ran fast enough and smart enough that for a moment, for a brief moment you wished you could have stayed in forever, he lost you. Hid in the alleyway of two tall homes crumbling from the inside, you had your eyes set on the church. If you could just make it there without him seeing, you'd be able to hideout without a real fight, you could bide your time until Gabe came with the plane. 

Breathe in.

Breathe out. 

Steady your heart. 

Focus. Focus on getting out of this alive. 

If you didn't focus, fear would consume you. He lost you, but that also meant you lost him. You needed to stay low, move as quietly as possible to hopefully avoid detection. The only potential issue you could see was the open field before the church, there was bearly any cover apart from a statue out front of an angel kneeling with wide wings and eyes looking to an unforgiving sky. You could do this, you just had to be quick. 

Keeping to the side of the building, you clung to the shadows with eyes scanning the area for any signs of blue coats or blond hair. If he was hiding, he was doing a damn good job at it.   

"Heading to the church now." You spoke into your earpiece. 

"Morrison has not returned to his team, be cautious." One of your agents rang into your ear. "I'm almost at your position Reaper." 

"Make it quick." Gabe snarled. "Lightning, do you have visual on Morrison?"  

"Negative." 

One last deep breath and you sprinted for it, straight to the church.

Shots littered around you, the sound of a pulse rifle you were all too familiar with. Bullets scattered against the cobblestone road as you swerved to avoid them.

"Fuck!" You couldn't turn around, but you could tell from the angles he'd been watching you from cover in one of the crumbling brick homes.

Never happier to have super soldier genes pumping through your blood, as he fired a pulse bomb you dodged just in time with the hit landing feet from you sending the area around you into a cloudy dusty brick mess. He missed you, he'd be reloading right now, you needed to use the cover to your advantage. 

As you moved through the low cloud, you were quick to duck but a new round flew at you and a bullet grazed along the top of your helmet. It made a deafening sound, one that made your head split into an instant headache like the loudest nails on a chalkboard that were scratching against the very insides of your eardrums. The augmented vision of the helmet around you burst into static, effectively blinding you as you felt wind whistling in from a new crack going up the side of your helmet. You were gasping in shock fearing the bullet made contact with your skull and you just couldn't feel it yet. The statue was crumbling in on itself as bulletholes tore through it, ruining its structure.   

"I've made contact, moving in." 

"What the hell was that?" Panic, _absolute_ _panic_ was in Gabe's voice. 

"I can't see- fuck Gabe, I can't see anything. He hit me, he got the top I think- fuck! I have to take my helmet off." You were breathless as you spouted off, the weight of the situation weighing you down like stones in an ocean. Morrison was coming for you, there was no more running from this, there was no relying on Gabe to get you from the plane. You hadn't made the right call, now you were just utterly and completely alone.   

"Target still moving, possibly injured. Strike team hold, wait for my order." 

"He's going to know it's you." Gabe's voice cracked in your earpiece. "You won't be protected. If he shoots again I can't get to you in time, even if I use my smoke." 

"I don't really have much of an option here." 

You ducked beneath the angel statue as you squinted through the visual static, grinding your teeth together as you bore through the pain of your helmet splitting from a bullet grazing the top. Morrison's heavy footsteps were rushing toward you, quickly closing in on your cover as you pulled off the now split reflective headpiece. Through it, you could see the own fear in your eyes, the color that was draining from your face. No blood in your hair, but you didn't want to even think what that would have done if you hadn't been wearing your helmet. 

"Fuck. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry-" Focus. Now wasn't the time to cry.  

Everything was moving too quickly for your hurting head, the noise in your ears was buzzing louder and louder with static that seemed to be coming from your own skull. There was no escaping Morrison. There was nowhere to run, no time to be saved, no mask to hide behind. Instead, you stayed sitting behind cover, relented to final moments convinced these last few breaths may very well be your last.

“Approaching target.”

“Get to the plane. If I can't get out of this, finish what we started. I can take all the blame for this. For everything.”

“I’m not leaving you behind!” 

“It’s not worth both of us getting caught. You need to go. I'm so sorry. I love you so much, please go.” 

"No-"

“Target is hiding behind a stone statue at the Saint Margaret church. She's speaking, likely communicating with Reaper. Stay sharp, he could be anywhere.” 

You couldn’t listen to Morrison in your ear anymore, fingers pulled the small device and tossed it off to the side. You stared at it, catching sobs in your chest, knowing all too well you’d also pulled your lifeline to Gabe.  

“You’re surrounded! Remove your weapons and gloves, then put your hands in the air!” Morrison barked at you from behind. 

Hands shaking you unholstered your pistol then slid it across the cobblestone into his vision. With a fluid motion, you flipped over your voice modulator and pulled off your gloves, no longer hiding behind either of them. Vulnerable, you were alone and completely vulnerable to him, hoping beyond hope that Morrison wouldn't shoot first and ask questions later. Your throat was dry, he wasn't the kind of person to do that. If you knew anything about Jack Morrison, even if he had changed over the years, you knew he'd try to deescalate first and only harm if he had to, but still, there was some doubt stirring in you.  

Metal boots circled around your makeshift barricade and you hung your head over your lap as you lifted palms into the air. Looking down, Genji’s knives stayed strapped at your thigh- your only defense if Morrison tried anything deadly. 

“Keep those hands where I can see them scumbag. Bringing you in is long overdue, your acts of terror are finally-” The footsteps stopped, you could just see his combat boots in the corner of your eye with flashes of the end of a bright blue jacket. His voice trailed off, distracted and distant as you assumed your scars and face came into his view. 

Static was gone.

Footsteps silenced.

Heartbeat paused.

Even the breeze moving the trees rested as you lifted your eyes to meet his, jaw quivering with fear of which version of Morrison you’d be looking to. 

Shock, that was the best way you could have described it. He stood as still as the statue you hid behind, pulse rifle lowered to his side, his face was blank but his eyes carried every memory of you flashing before his mind. His blond hair was fading to a soft color that almost looked like it had been dyed to hide grays, the scars on his face were deep and gnarly things much more horrific than they were on TV- the power of makeup artists before press conferences, you guessed. A familiar blue eyepiece hovered in front of his face, and that jacket, that stupid blue jacket that you loved so much had been outfitted with the best armor any military could provide. His chest began to rise and fall with deep heavy breaths of disbelief, scruff on his jaw caught the sunlight every time he opened his mouth only to shut it again. 

A garbled voice was asking him something over his earpiece only for him to continue staring at you in silence.

You locked eyes, wanting to cry, wanting nothing more than to break down but that would only show him just how weak you were- and you weren't weak anymore. His whole body looked like it was about to shake, every muscle constricting in on itself and hands twitching with nerves. 

The voice came again and Morrison snapped at it. 

“Apprehending target now, do not approach. All agents focus attention on stopping Reaper. I'll handle this.” His face was twisted in a snarl, eyes narrowed to glare across the roads looking for signs of Reaper before he clicked off his eyepiece cutting himself off from his own communication. 

You couldn't breathe. He can’t take you in now, not when you were almost done. You needed to fight back, you needed to yell at him, create a diversion, you needed to do _something_. But you were frozen. The section in the back of your armor where a bullet was buried ached with a forming bruise, everything hurt. Hands at eye level hanging in the air, he circled his gun to attach it at his back.

Your heart was beating in your throat as he reached out, familiar hands offering to help you to your feet. 

“Did I hurt you?” He sounded rough, like he’d been yelling far too much. 

“No, you just grazed my helmet. I’m okay.” You spoke softly, gentle as you placed your hands in his and felt his fingers wrap around yours then pull you up.

He seemed to hold his breath as you stood, watching you with bitter carefulness. He moved in a flash and you gasped thinking he was going in for the kill, your body stiffened and resisted only to realize he was hugging you as tight as he ever had. It felt too kind. Too intimate. To flip from shooting you to being so careful in the way he touched you- it felt wrong. His breathing was labored, from running or adrenaline or just the fear of seeing a dead woman. A hand tangled with the back of your hair, holding your head to his chest, keeping you close. Maybe you were afraid of him, or maybe your feelings had changed, but all you could do was stand there frozen in silence as he held you. 

Finally catching his breath, realizing what he was doing, he stepped back with hands that trailed down your arms and fingers over old scars until his fingers hooked with yours again.  

“There has not been a single day that I haven’t thought about you leaving my hotel room that night.” Even though you were standing still he kept your hands in his. “I told myself I should have never let you leave. I blamed myself when you went missing and all I wanted to do was find you. Breaking up with you destroyed me, sweetheart. You begged me to just trust you and I should have, I should have listened to you, for years I’ve been blaming myself for-" He stared at you, at your unchanging expression of fear and looked down to your hands in his before gripping hard.

"I'm sorry." You whispered. "I lied about so much. I thought I was doing the right thing-" 

"I blamed myself for you going MIA, blamed myself for your death- but you’re not dead. I searched for you, _mourned_ for you. I believed that if you were alive you would have had the decency to seek me out, that no matter what we went through that our love was beyond and pain we'd endure. Now here you are... You’ve been alive the whole goddamn time and _this_ is what you’ve been doing?” 

“You don’t understand-” 

“What don’t I understand? Has someone been forcing you to do this, to reprogram and kill people? Was _this_ what you were asking me to trust, that you were becoming some sort of psychopath intent on joining the very people who wanted another omnic war?” His grip was getting tighter, restraining you from moving, from ever getting away from him again. 

“It's not like that please just let me explain-” Panic was rising in your voice. 

“Let me guess, it’s _Reyes_ under that Reaper mask isn’t it?! It all makes so much sense now, you two wandering off for weeks at a time, your training, his lying in report after report. How long have you known, how damn long have you been partnering with Talon?!” He was gripping you by the arms now, shaking you in anger. 

“We’re stopping Talon.” You pleaded, trying to jerk your arms from him but his grip was far too tight. “Listen to me! Gabe and I, we're almost done with it. We’ve been destroying them from the inside out! Their armies are practically gone, their money, their power, soon Talon will completely gone-”

“How long have you known he was Reaper?” Morrison growled out at you, towering over as he forced you to look him in his icy eyes. “Tell me the truth.”

You caught a dry sob in your throat, he looked like he already knew the answer. Part of him already realized you’d known all along, the pieces of the secrets you’d kept from him were all falling into place. Every moment you tried to speak your voice felt like it was getting weaker, your jaw was shaking. Seconds that ticked by with you choking on your words only made his eyes burn brighter and the muscles in his neck twitch as they tensed. You'd seen him angry. You'd seen him pissed off. But you'd never been on the look Jack Morrison gave his enemies, it shook you to your bones.   

“‘I’ve always known.” You whispered, lips tight holding back cries. 

His shoulders dropped, lips twisting together in anger as he nodded to the air finally confirming thoughts he’d held onto for years. Deep breaths pushed from his nose, nostrils flaring as he chewed at his lips. 

“So that’s what was so important to you. You would have rather kept his secrets than attempted to have a life with me. Well, look at what that did to you. Look at yourself. Look at where his actions brought you! You’re going to rot in prison for all the terrible things you’ve done, and why? Just because Gabe was able to manipulate you into thinking you were taking Talon down together? You've only made things worse, Talon may be dwindling but you've only sprouted smaller extremist groups that have been popping up now that Talon is losing power. Your focus was too linear, you've stopped the giant but spawned copycat organizations all across the globe. You could have taken down Talon the right way, with Overwatch, if you had just opened your eyes and looked at the plans we had-” 

“If I stayed with Overwatch I would have ended up in a grave! I saw how many people that explosion killed.” You spat back, struggling in his hold. You stared into the deep scars on his face, scars that looked like they'd split the front of his face right down to his brain- scars of a dead man. “I saw that _you_ were supposed to be dead.”  

“Turns out it takes a lot more than a building falling on me to take me down.” He clenched his jaw, eyes flashing to your split reflective mask on the floor. “Not everyone is lucky enough to have SEP drugs keeping them alive, people like Arntz die because they're not strong enough to fight back people like you. She died in my home and _you_ were there, you didn't stop him from snapping her neck but you could have. You spent so long hating me because I made a terrible mistake that got her hurt, that killed your team and this is how you honor them?! I don’t even recognize you anymore, the woman I loved would have never allowed someone to die like that! What did Gabe do to you? Reprogram you? Threaten you?”

“It was my idea not to go back, I went with him willingly.” You snarled and thrashed around in his grip, now you were getting angry. He wanted someone else to blame, anyone but you to be responsible for your actions. All Morrison wanted was the girl he knew before but she was long gone. “Maybe I am different, but I’m stronger now. Stronger than I ever was with you. Gabe’s done more for me that you ever have.”

“He made you into a killer!” He raised his voice. 

“No, he just never held me back.” You made your move, jutting your knee in the air aiming for the center of his stomach to knock the wind out of him and find an opening. 

Distracted by your attempted blow he loosened his grip at your hands just enough for you to find your moment for control. Fighting Morrison wasn’t too unlike fighting Gabe, a hulking frame of a man built from muscle. Morrison tended to dodge and disarm where Gabe would block and fight hand to hand. Their fighting styles were different, but physically it was not much of a challenge to adjust your moves to meet Morrison’s. Your knee landed at his armor sending a shock of pain through your leg but you persisted. In the moment he bent forward and gasped you went for his legs, sweeping your foot at his ankles to get him off balance so you could drop low and curl behind him. As he stumbled on himself, you snapped off his pulse rifle and sent it flying down the road as far as possible from him. Morrison let out a groan, grabbing for his pistol at his leg as he turned back to you. 

Stopping him from fully unholstering his weapon you grabbed his wrist and slid across the ground with enough force to spin him, but this time he was ready for you and turned with you on his heels. Back in close proximity, he lunged for you in an attempt to grab you in his arms. You punched up, aiming for his face with a tightly closed fist.    

“I don’t want to hurt you.” He groaned as you tried to hit his jaw, missing by inches.  

“Then stop trying to capture me!” You avoided his hand going for your arm, missing him raising his pistol into the air to fire two shots. You fell backward at the loud noise, ears no longer protected by your helmet and your hands pressing hard to the side of your head. 

“We can’t let you escape! You’ve ruined too many lives to walk away from this.” He pounced towards you.

Focus. Gather yourself. Your team would hear those shots and know something was wrong. Winding up again through the air your fist made contact with his jaw. The audible crack of teeth smashing against each other almost sent you reeling with a terrible cringe as his jaw bounced together and the armor on your knuckles ripped his skin following the punch. He wouldn't allow you a moment to catch your mind, even through the hit he grabbed one hand at your wrist and the other at your waist, ignoring the pain you’d caused him and his blood dripping to your clothes. 

He was so strong, so fucking strong, how you ever had the false confidence that you would be able to take him in hand to hand combat seemed idiotic. You struggled with him, groaning against his tough wrestling to get you to the ground, forcing your body to crumple beneath his. Once you broke he had you with your back to the ground, holding your wrists to the cobblestone street as you tried to shove him off with the bottom of your boots to his stomach. In another situation, another time, holding you down like this would have just been a tease, you’d be demanding him to rip off your clothes but now you just felt fear. He was too strong, stronger than your super soldier genes could keep fighting back against.

You were catching your breath, brain beating against your skull with a sickening pressure. 

He had you. His face was so, so angry. 

He pinned you to the road and his body was heavy over yours, your legs were giving out as they tried to push him off you to no avail. He broke through forcing your legs to fall to the ground, pushing his knees against the tops of your thighs to keep you in place. You couldn't fight him, you couldn't out power him. With short breaths, you forced your body to stop fighting. You allowed him to hold you down as he strapped magnetic cuffs to your wrists. He looked so unbelievably angry, and so desperately sad. 

“I love you, but I wish I didn’t.” He said under his breath, voice shaking. “That’s what you said to me when I told you I loved you. Do you remember that?” 

Hands above your head, completely vulnerable to him and a tear falling from the corner of your eye you watched as he dirtied his face pushing hair from his forehead. He sat back on his legs with a deep sigh, icy eyes glistening as he sucked at his teeth and lifted his gaze down the street.

You did it. You did exactly what you told him you would when you held a burning picture of him over a trash can so many years ago: You made him miserable, but it didn't feel anywhere near as good as you once thought it would. How could it when there was still a flicker of something the resembled love? A cold laugh left him before he returned his eyes to you. 

“Funny." Morrison chuckled but it was a cold smile, the most pathetic attempt you'd ever seen him make at a smile and you'd seen his press conference smiles. "I guess that’s how I feel about you now. I should have just listened to you back then, maybe then this wouldn’t be so hard.”

“I never wanted to be your enemy.” Your voice broke. Morrison sighed and brought your cuffed hands to rest over your stomach, careful to rotate your shoulders and not cause you discomfort even though his body weight was pressing against the tops of your thighs threatening at any moment to break them in half.

His lips squeezed together as he slipped fingers between yours. One last fleeting chance for intimacy as he clicked his tactical glass back on.

“Captain McCree, status?” There was a soft grumbling that he listened intently as he scanned the area around. Taking the last kindness you would get from him, your fingers gently wrapped around his, holding him tight even through the awkward angle of the handcuffs. “I see. Fall back on Reaper to converge on my location, he’s likely coming after Lightning and will show himself to save her. I’ve apprehended her-” He paused with a sharp breath. “You were right, McCree. It’s her.”

“He knew?” Your throat felt tight. Morrison clicked off the open channel to speak only to you.

“He suspected it, him and Shimada both. I tried to tell them that it was impossible, that you would never do anything like this. Should have listened to the kid I guess.” He'd never looked this solemn as he stared down at your hands intertwined in his. "I'll never understand the connection you and Gabriel had. Whatever it was that brought you closer together, whether that was me, or Blackwatch, or having agents like McCree around, I knew I never had that with you. I tried to help you, I really did sweetheart. I wanted to see you become the strong powerful woman I saw you as, instead he helped you become... this."     

You stayed silent. Deathly silent, even though your mind was screaming to say something to him. Black smoke was curling at your feet, building behind Morrison like a looming shadow. Even though the mask, the clothing that hid him completely, you could feel just how uncontrollably pissed off Gabe was as he formed again. Morrison kept his eyes on you, watching your reaction carefully.

"He's ruined you." He whispered.

Gabe was looming behind him, ready for an attack. You released your fingers around Morrison’s hand, readying yourself for whatever fight he was about to get into with the now director of Overwatch. There was an upset in your stomach, a childish anger that lashed around with a rage you hadn't felt in years. He was still able to get a rise out of you, and it was one that had you searching your thoughts for anything you could say to him that would cut the deepest- even if it wasn't true. 

“Jack-” You gasped, knowing Gabe needed him distracted as smoky arms curled at Morrison’s midsection. “I saw you at your press conference, the one where you told the world about what happened with the mines and about what happened with Arntz. There's something I need you to know, something important-”

"What?" He growled and squeezed at your arms. You were watching behind him, carefully timing your response to Gabe's signal.

"I never really forgave you for it."  

“You-” He gasped, all he managed to say before Gabe’s smoke was completely surrounding his midsection.

A horrified breath left him as he was lifted into the air and thrown to the side trailing black behind him as he flew yards from you. In an instant Gabe formed fully, Reaper mask hovering above you as he worked on prying apart your cuffs. With a snap, they came undone and became heavy metal bracelets you’d just have to deal with until you could get somewhere safe to laser them off. Gabe worked fast, all too familiar with getting you out of tough situations. Morrison was coughing out against the road after his body rolled across the ground, hitting hard against an abandoned utility car.

Gabe’s talons carefully combed through your hair, inspecting for any sign of injury from the shot at the top of your head. 

“I’d sooner kill everyone here than leave you behind.” His thumb traced your jaw, holding at your chin. “Moira and the team got to the plane, they're on the way to the base now. Reinhardt puts up one hell of a fight, but he's got much too old for this. Extraction is on the way, as soon as they can get close enough Widow will release her escape line and we can fly out of here. Get your gun, we have to put up a fight until then.” 

A perfect soldier, you sprung into action reaching for your pistol which had been tossed far aside in the dirt. Gabe grabbed Morrison’s pulse rifle, hooking his shotguns to his holsters at his back and aiming the rifle towards Morrison’s body as he stumbled back to his feet. 

“He called for backup.” You warned Gabe with a glare over your shoulder to Morrison. You checked your gun, turning it around in your hand. "If they know Moira got away, that probably means the whole gang is coming for a reunion with us." 

"You're down a helmet, and your armor is damaged. We need cover right now." He turned to the church. "Stick to your original plan, get in there as high up as you can go and stick it out. Don't engage unless I call for you, we can't risk you being in the line of fire without protection." 

"Understood, sir." You shook your wrists, they were hurting from the weight of the broken cuffs.

Then you took off sprinting, through wide wood doors with carvings of heaven and hell and onto rickety ladders that lead up to the highest points of the bell tower. Gabe stayed behind, standing at the front doors with Morrison's gun drawn waiting for the director to make his move. You hid in the shadows of the bell tower, atop the creaking cracked floorboards the threatened to give beneath you at any moment. A bell almost as tall as you were sat dormant, leaned against the far wall never to ring again. Shaking hands landed over your heart as you peeked around the corners of the open arches to spy on the confrontation between two former friends.        

Morrison was dragging his aching body closer with every slow step, anger in his eyes and staring down the barrel of his own gun held by Gabe.  

"Take off that mask Reyes, it's over!" He shouted loud enough for it to echo off the walls of the tower. 

"Not a step closer!" He dropped the part of his voice that carried the threat, all you heard now was Gabe. "Don't think I won't shoot you. If you know who I am then you know what I'm capable of, I won't hold back just because of our history." 

With one eye peering around the corner, you looked to Morrison who was slowly walking forward. He hovered his hands in the air, a sign that he wasn't going to try anything. Far down the road, you caught movement. Caravans of agents peeling their way through ruined streets over broken cobblestone. They hung off the sides of the cars, stood in the backs, they were prepared to move quickly if they needed to and you hadn't counted on that. Your heart was bouncing with panic, you had no way of warning Gabe, shouting would give your position away, throwing something too obvious too, you were stuck in silence.  

"Whatever sick fantasy you put in her head of destroying Talon is over." Morrison bellowed. "The world is changing. It's not just a war against omnics anymore, we're fighting people like you. Super soldiers, people with inhuman abilities, with IQs through the roof that are turning the world to chaos for as much money as they can. There are entire terrorist factions dedicated to learning to kill the way you do, Reaper is a symbol of Overwatch's failure and it's all the more ironic that it's you behind that mask. The world was a better place when you were working with us, not against us. What happened, what changed, Gabriel?" 

"You can't talk your way through this, boy scout." Gabe raised the pulse rifle to his eyes, lining a shot if he needed to. Your heart was racing, he must hear the cars coming from far in the distance. 

"Gabriel-" Morrison's gruff voice started.

"If I still wanted to listen to your lectures, I would have gone back to Overwatch long before now!" Even from far away, from high in the bell tower you could see strands of black rising into the air. He was losing control far too quickly and if he didn't focus then you knew a bloodbath was coming. "Your charms won't work here, Jack. There's no talking your way out of this. I've had just about enough of your pathetic persona on TV playing the victim, pretending to make Overwatch better than it was, but with you in charge, we all know you're going to slip up and make stupid decisions just like you always have."

"I said take off that mask!" The pure anger in Morrison's voice shook you. 

He was still stepping closer, trying to push Gabe into either acting on his threats to shoot him or to lower the weapon aimed at his old friend. It was a power play, a lethal game of chicken to see who would break first and you could see it just in the energy between them that neither would relent. From your spot high on the tower, you watched Gabe steady his aim at Morrison's increasingly closer body, sights looking to the center of his forehead. Every heartbeat against your chest beat with the words, _no, no, no, Gabriel, no._

You didn't want Morrison dead, no matter how much you had betrayed him, you didn't want him dead. 

The smoke around Gabe was getting thicker. Morrison's goading was pushing him past the point of thinking straight and if you didn't intervene he would be unrecognizable and unstoppable. Morrison was too cocky, he still only saw the man he used to know hiding behind a mask, all too unaware of just how capable Gabe was. You had to put an end to it.

With only a pistol, you tried to breathe and steady your hand aiming for the pulse rifle in Gabe's arms. 

One shot. It flew through the air with a deafening bang immediately giving away where you were. You watched as Gabe's body burst into smoke the moment he heard it, sending the rifle clattering to the ground and Morrison to run after it. Smoke curled away from the rifle, only to form with his mask looking to you and claws digging into the earth. His body was visible but surrounded with black and quickly becoming something you only saw in nightmares.

"Focus on me!" You screamed down at him, begging for him not to lose to control.  

Whirring, head pounding whirring was approaching from somewhere in the sky. You whipped around to look for your backup, spotting a Talon dropship with Widowmaker readying a line from open bay doors. They were moments away, Gabe just needed to grab on to the end of the line and you'd be able to jump to it, safety was here to take you far away from Morrison. He just needed to control himself a little longer. Your eyes fell back to the road, Morrison had jumped for his rifle and thick smoke cut him off stopping him from reaching the weapon. Gabe was drifting between forms, messy as the two tried to fight each other hand to hand. Blows would land but your sight was blocked by black clouds, their grunts as they fought echoed up to you and made your hands shake again. 

"Gabe!" You screamed at them. There was blood against a blue jacket, that much you could see. Gabe's cloak was ripped at the end, shredded like paper. His weaponized armor, spikes at his arms, his abilities and heavy metal only made him all the more deadly. He kept fighting even as the dropship was coming to pass, a line falling to him that he only had one chance for. There was no chance to think, you backed up as far as you could to get as much momentum as possible and sprinted using all the strength in your legs to jump from the edge towards it as you called to him.  "Gabe, look up!" 

His snarl sounded off below you but there was no opportunity to look down, your hands wrapped at the line and looked up to a familiar blue face hidden behind the mask fit for a spider. The line tugged hard as the ship moved with a lurching motion away, a clawed hand wrapped at your ankle telling you he was there and you let out a shaking breath. The magnetic cuffs at your wrist rubbed against the metal line, scraping together as you turned to look back at the construction site of a village and at the endless Overwatch agents pouring from their caravan surrounding Morrison who was kelt on the ground. 

There was shouting, something loud and obscene coming from a man chasing after the dropship as it flew. The wind created by the dropship blew off his cowboy hat and just as scruffy as he always had been, Jesse McCree was staring right at you. The only difference now was his Peacemaker pointed in your direction. He was screaming, something you couldn't hear above the wind, but you saw him line up his shot, saw a bullet fly through the sky straight to Gabe below you. When the shot made contact the line swung through the air, almost unsteadying your grip as it was pulled into the dropship. 

One last glance, one last look at Morrison. A long distance to the ground, you could see his blue eyes burning up at you. He was buckled over, arms to his center, looking to the sky for you and for a long moment that almost stopped time itself you met his eyes. 

There were so many other things you wished you said. Part of you even wished you could be on the ground with him, tending to the quickly bruising jaw he was rubbing. 

"I'm sorry." You spoke into the wind, knowing he would never hear it. 

A small group of Talon agents pulled you and Gabe in, ones that were left behind still fully faithful to the organization. You laid motionless on the floor as Amélie pushed up her eyepiece and looked at you with disgust. Her hands rested on her knees as she bent over you, inspecting with cold eyes for any injuries while one of your lieutenants put pressure to Gabe's midsection. Your body felt like it was made of lead, heavy and threatening to take the whole ship down with your thoughts. Seeing Morrison again, seeing hatred in his eyes, unspeakable guilt was eating away at you.  

"This is one of the most powerful bullet wounds I have ever seen." The lieutenant ripped off his own helmet to speak to you. You saw his exact feelings on his face: there was surprise, recognition even, as he looked to your unmasked face for the first time.  

One of your most trusted lieutenants, a well-meaning agent from Haiti who was just trying to survive a cruel world. Trusted was a loose term, he was more so the one you minded the least. He was smart, smarter than most of the other useless agents who just wasted your time. The moment he saw how powerful you were he flipped sides, dedicated to serving you and Reaper. Once loyal to Tishler, well on his way to becoming an apprentice under Tishler's medical research, it didn’t take long for you to realize he was an agent who helped Tishler in any and every way he could have, including making a dozen roses at your doorstep possible. He sat by in compliance during the months you were Tishler’s prisoner, but he watched and snuck you little kindnesses, biding his time to step away from Tishler once he saw the hatred in your eyes. A smart man who knew where to put his stock- the moment he heard what you did to his former commander, he kneeled at your feet and promised to serve you dutifully. 

When he swore to you, you hesitated. But he did anything you commanded with no fight. Anything you asked. Bodies to clean up? He was on it before they were done bleeding out. Blackmail to deliver? It was already in his hands. A silent helper who did what you wanted, no questions asked- maybe that’s why you’d kept him around for so long as part of the small team dedicated to the last strings of Talon.

"How bad is it?" You groaned and pushed yourself on your side, turning to Gabe who was writhing in pain on the floor. 

"Through his armor." Your lieutenant said, eyes bouncing between Gabe's wound and your face. You dropped your expression, staring at him with death in your eyes.

"Help him." You threatened, fingers resting on your pistol. "Unless your loyalty has wavered."

* * *

Gabe was unconscious by the time you made it back to base, his body had given out from an aching pain of a bullet digging into his hip. Your lieutenant did everything he could to get him stable, it was enough to know he'd survive, but you knew he'd need more than a few days for even his super soldier body to recover. He was wheeled down to Moira's lab, propped up on one of her operating chairs to be in a more comfortable position as she examined the wound and you sat at the window looking out to choppy ocean waters smelling her black coffee brewing at the back of the lab.

Sat in your usual spot you were picking at your cuticles, nervously tapping on the glass waiting to hear Moira's conclusion about his wellbeing. After the plane, you fell silent. Everything was hitting you at once, rushes of emotions you weren't sure you were prepared to face. There was a familiar feeling, a low bubbling panic that once sent you running to Moira begging to avoid it. Now, you sat quietly, curled in on yourself in your seat at the corner of her lab watching the way she poked and prodded at bruising injuries on Gabe's midsection.   

"He's weak, but he'll survive so long as he rests." She almost sounded annoyed. Lashes hung low over her eyes, you tried not to stare at the deep veins taking over her face but it was hard not look as she approached you with a steaming coffee cup. "Did you get any sleep on the trip in?" 

"Not much." You muttered. 

"Luitenant Baptiste tells me you had a run in with the director of Overwatch and a sharpshooter in a cowboy hat. Would you want to talk about it?" She spoke softly, one hand holding the warmth of the cup close to her, the other grazing long nails through your hair. Your eyes avoided hers, staring at the grout in the tiles of the floor. No. You didn't want to talk about it. Your issues were bottling up deep in your subconscious to be dealt with later. 

"We need to push up our timeline Moira, I can't bear another fight against them." Somehow it felt like those nails of hers were wrapped around your heart, sinking into the muscles and controlling every beat. "How much longer until they've set all the explosives?" 

"Two days." She hummed, twisting a lock of your hair around her finger while she frowned through another sip of strong coffee. "If you want to push it up we'll need to release more of the agents soon. That does not give me a lot of time to erase their memories of working with Talon, some may need _other_ ways to forget."     

"Talon still has plenty of money to pay off the remaining agents." 

"And where am I to go? Now that they've taken hold of Tishler's former home I have nowhere else safe."

"You should look into the university that sent you an offer, I'll set you up with a new identity so you can continue your work under another name." You leaned into her hand, the side of your face nuzzling into her palm. It was a move you knew would make her pull her hand away, but the brief moment of comfort you found in it was more than enough to make you smile for a few seconds. "Contact them in the morning, I need to get this plan going so I can finally put all this behind me. I think I'm going to break if I push myself any further." 

"I will give it some thought." The hand formerly in your hair returned to her cup, wrapping around it as she leaned against the counter to look at Gabe half alive and shirtless. "His treatment is going in now, you should let him rest. Get some sleep too, I know you need it." 

"I'll try." Your smile to her was small as she finished her drink and unbuttoned her lab coat before pulling off her tie and undoing the first few buttons of her shirt. It was long since her usual time of dressing down. "Heading out?"  

"For now." Had she always looked this exhausted? You should be telling her to sleep. "Here." 

Long arms held out her lab coat, offering you a makeshift blanket to sleep under while you waited for her serum to pump through Gabe's veins. You curled beneath it, propping yourself up and facing him, letting your head lull back into sleep as she left you alone with him. It wasn't warm, it covered you awkwardly and didn't quite hit everywhere you wished it did, but the weight in it helped you get comfortable in the seat. 

As sleep took over, your head bobbed down too heavy for your neck to keep up. You thought about Morrison, about the cold look he gave you as you clutched to a line in the air. It had been a long time since you felt this guilty. Maybe that uneasy feeling in your stomach was trying to tell you something, that panic in the bottom of your throat threatening to escape you with every blink that lasted too long. You needed sleep, but you shouldn't sleep. To say you were afraid to dream that night, to know from the gut feeling deep in your soul that you should have stayed awake, everything about passing out where you did and in the state that you were in seemed like a terrible idea. 

If becoming part of Talon was the beginning of the end, falling asleep in Moira's lab that night was the stop sign before the crash. 

Sleep quickly fell to night terrors. 

A familiar forest on fire. You stood between thick mature trees, eyes searching for a cabin in the distance, one you were chasing but could never reach. Your mission, your one goal: you had to get to that cabin, you knew you had to get there, but you knew something bad would happen if you did. Swallowing your fear, the taste of smoke lingered thick in the back of your throat and made it hard to breathe, but you had a point to make, you had somewhere to be, guilt and shame would no longer hold you back. You walked, but none of the trees seemed to be moving. This time the cabin got closer, almost like the forest was collapsing in on itself around your feet. Just before the cabin there was a clearing, underbrush disturbed and earth dug up in small spots.

Your stomach dropped. Mines. There were mines here, of course there were mines here. The logical part of your brain knew there would be but the fearless side told you to trek through anyways. You tiptoed, over small mounds straight to the door, miraculously stepping over all of them. Something about walking over them felt dizzying, fuzzy as if your legs were numb and you couldn't quite stand right, wabbling as if you'd had far too much to drink. Finally at the cabin door you'd never reached before, you pushed open a simple door stumbling into a mostly empty room.   

Morrison sat there, his back to you and blond hair practically glowing in the dim light as he hunched forward in a lonely chair. He turned to look at you with the signature smirk of his, the one that got you into trouble in the first place. His scars were gone, dark bags beneath his eyes missing. Your perfect poster boy waiting for you.  

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Morrison asked, his voice deeper than it usually was. He sounded off, groggy even, like he wasn’t himself. 

“This is all _your_ fault.” You scolded with a sinking heart. 

Morrison. It all started with Jack Morrison and your stupid admiration for him, with that stupid mission he sent you on that got your team killed. You would have never joined Overwatch if it wasn’t for him, you would have never met Gabe if it wasn’t for him, you would have never become a _monster_ if it wasn’t for him.

He said Gabe ruined you, but it all started with him.  

“What’s my fault?” 

“ _You_ ruined me.” You were trying to curl your fists, to feel your nails digging into the fleshy parts of your hand but you couldn't feel a thing. 

Morrison froze as his eyes met yours, his smirk dropping to fear. His body shifted, hand reaching behind a commander’s jacket to his belt as he turned to face you. He looked like he was going to be sick. 

“I know. You deserve better, you’ve always deserved better.” That voice wasn't his. You knew it wasn't his but you couldn't focus on anything other than the dead look in his eyes. 

Shaking hands you pushed through the numbness to beat balled fists at the sides of your legs, anger was finally bubbling over in your chest. It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fucking fair that _he_ was the reason you were here. If he’d never been the strike commander you would have never followed him into battle, the mines would have never gone off, you would have never found your family with Blackwatch. Everything tumbled over itself, one thing to the next leading you to a path of rejecting your every idea of what Overwatch was. You left but Morrison became stronger, you became a villain of his story and still he tried to be gentle with you. You were screaming at yourself, his version of love was weak and you couldn't let him drag you down to his level. 

“I wish you’d never told me you loved me.” You blurted out, throat hoarse and voice sounding impossibly far away. 

He stared at you with these watery dulled eyes. Your nails were digging into your skin but you couldn't feel the pain, only the pressure and the anger from the way he looked to you with such accepting eyes. He dropped to look at an empty spot on the floor between you, avoiding your gaze too afraid to admit that he was the one who destroyed you. His body was surrounded in ashy smoke, embers rising to the ceiling and lighting the roof to a roaring blaze. The room felt concrete and cold, but your mind forced it to burst into flames that licked at your skin. 

“I pushed you too far.” His voice cracked, and for a brief moment he sounded like Gabe.

The buzzing of static faded around the corners of your eyes and deafened you as you almost fell to the ground.

No, no it wasn’t Morrison who pushed you too far. There was another to blame, another man who did everything in his power to drag you down with him, he forced you to dig your own grave and practically pushed your face in the dirt. The man who pushed you too far was dead, you made sure of it yourself.

Fuck, your head was splitting with an awful headache. Morrison looked strikingly bizarre, his whole body morphing. It was like looking into a mirror that showed you different people from different angles, a sick version of a funhouse that tormented you with the men in your life. Icy eyes faded to soulless dark centers, blond hair to red shaved down to reveal a nasty scar along the top of a head. Still sat low in the chair, all too fucking comfortable, Tishler stared at you with the eyes of a psychopath wanting you to beg for your voice. 

What was it his stupid tattoo said on the inside of his arm?  _Timor mortis conturbat me_ , you looked that up one night after he'd gone to sleep and you were left voiceless and alone trapped in your tiny room with his team. _The fear of death disturbs me_ , he wore that phrase in Latin as a flag, a symbol that he was unafraid of his own actions. Tishler, that man, he was the one who pushed you too far. His cold demeanor towards death, towards reprogramming, the way he forced you to practice things you never wished you had -that was the man who broke you.   

“You silenced me!” You screamed at the bizarre mix of Morrison and Tishler. “I couldn’t breathe! I couldn’t speak!” 

An expression crossed him, a look in his eyes that widened with the realization of an inevitable death you recognized in an instant. There was only one way to combat this demon in your mind, there was only one way to remove Tishler from your dreams, to ignore his disregard for human life.  

“I never meant to-”

“Evil!” Your throat was aching as you tried to scream, you couldn’t even tell how loud you were screeching or even if your voice was actually being heard. In a heartbeat you pounced on him, knocking him from his chair and wrestling with him to the ground. The chair that toppled over with him shattered into millions of glass pieces, glittering around you in the sky and defying gravity to rise with the ash around his body. You felt like a wild animal, attacking useless pray, but there was something so deeply satisfying about it. As he hit the floor blood poured from the crook in his arm, spurting and spraying across you and on the cement as he frantically tried to reach for it to stop the bleeding. 

“Wake up!” He growled at you in the same way he would every morning he woke you up for the five months he kept you as a prisoner. 

"Fuck you." Your hand wrapped at his throat, finally gaining control of him.

It wasn't just Tishler, no, in your mind you could feel that he was an embodiment of every last one of the things you were still holding onto with such anger. Too many people thought they could control you. Too many many people gave you judgmental side glances or ran from you in the halls. Agents who died and left you behind, the people who you couldn't save. This wasn't just Tishler you were grabbing by the throat, this was everyone who doubted you, everyone who whispered about you as you passed them, this man was everyone who made you feel _worthless_.  

You refused to let anyone haunt you, least of all Tishler or Morrison. You stared down with a biting intensity, focusing on his face until Tishler was sharply in view. You'd killed him with your own hands once before and you’d do it again if that meant never having to look at his ugly smug face.

You felt powerful. You were in control. This time, no one was there to watch you, to comment or judge how you took him out. This time it was completely yours, you'd kill him again and make sure your mind was done with him. No taunting, or fighting. No breaking of his spirit, you didn’t give him a chance to fight back. No. Nothing bu you in control.

You sat on his chest and his large hands rested at the sides of your thighs with fingers digging into your skin beneath the edge of your running shorts- it almost made you sick that he would touch you like that. He clawed at you, tried to force you off of him, but you were powered with determination. In your dreams you were the most powerful person in the room, no one could stop you. This was your domain, this was what you wanted and you were going to take it, you refused to smell forest fire any longer.

Genji’s knives were in your hand faster than he could grab at your wrist. With a sharp breath and a swift motion, the blade buried deep into the center of his neck with a nauseating crunch of cutting straight through skin and muscles. The feeling was familiar but somehow far more terrible in the dream as a sense of utter doom blanketed you. It felt warm and cruel, your body twitched as if it was reacting to being sprayed with an open artery but you looked down to see bearly anything oozing from his neck.

Annoyed, you leaned into it, plunging it as deep as it could go with all your body weight and a disgusting choking sound escaped him as his large hand curled around your wrist in a poor attempt to stop you. 

“You can’t control me.” Your cheeks were wet, tears running over your cracked lips burning with the taste of blood and forest fire as thick black smoke surrounded you. “No one can control me, not anymore.” 

It felt like you couldn't breathe. Your brows twisted as you looked to him. Tishler was… crying? Water fell from the corner of his eyes, black water that oozed like oil as his face went blank and eyes rolled up towards the ceiling, twinkling against bright flames. Something about seeing him like this sent panic bolting through your nerves. Your breathing raced to rapid sharp short breaths as you twisted the knife in his neck hard like you were turning a key in a lock, ensuring you were destroying his ability to ever breathe again. No chance of survival, you were going to take away everything from him. 

His last motion was to hold you. Shaking exhausted arms with quickly drying blood across his skin moved to rest hands at the tops of your thighs, his thumbs rubbing in small gentle circles that almost felt like an act of forgiveness. 

Your stomach was uneasy, twisting around as if you were falling straight from the sky. The soles of your feet burned with the sensation of missing a step on the stairs, palms clammy and unable to move your fingers. That deep aching panic intensified instead of easing like you thought it would. With brows pinching together, you glared at him. Tishler was motionless beneath you. Weak. He was so weak. Even in your dreams he was a pathetic bleeding out mess on the floor. Every muscle in your body was trying to find the strength to tell him just how much you hated him, but your jaw felt wired shut.

An overwhelming sadness hit you like bricks, crushing you with a guilt of killing him twice that you didn't expect. You leaned back on your seat at his chest, resting yourself after pushing your body too far. Smoke was still embedded deep in your tastebuds. Static still clouding your ears. The fire on the ceiling was dwindling, ashes falling around you into smoke that was quickly fading. Dizzy, you felt nauseatingly dizzy. 

Your body shouldn’t hurt like this in a dream, your head shouldn’t pound like this from night terrors. Everything felt fuzzy, just out of focus and just out of reach. Your eyes burned.  

With heavy breaths you looked down to the mangled mess beneath you again, Tishler’s eyes were open and dulled with death. Black tears stained his cheeks and bled into the whites of his eyes clouding them. The thumbs at your thighs had long since stopped moving, time felt like it was warping ahead at hyper speed while also staying just as still as his body. You felt like you were sobbing but when you looked down at yourself, there was nothing. No tears, no fluttering heart, no reaction at all even though you could feel it deep inside that you were uncontrollably sobbing. There was a disconnect, some cut off from reality and your nightmare and something was gravely wrong. You waited for tells of your chest catching as you were wailing with sobs, warm tears and warmer blood splattered across your face, and you were tasting the horrific mix in your mouth and all you wanted to do was end him, but your stomach felt twisted because _night terrors don’t feel like this_. 

That couldn't be right. 

You closed your eyes tight. Tighter.

Silence. 

Numbness. 

No buzzing fluorescent lab lights. 

No wind whipping against the window. 

No feeling in chest of a rapid heartbeat. 

Your mouth tasted like blood and campfire. 

The rush was gone. 

_You wanted to wake up now._

The weight of the world was coming back. The dawning of consciousness was fading to you, but you couldn’t open your eyes. You could feel it. That slick of blood over your skin and clothes. The body beneath you, the growing bruise marks and the cuts across your skin of a struggle.

Silence broke as you dropped Genji’s blade to the floor, it rattled with a metal echo that sent a shiver down your neck through your spine and forced the hair on the back of your arms to stand at attention. It was cold, but your forehead was beading with sweat. As you sat there with legs saddled wide over your victim, you refused to open your eyes.

Your body knew. Your mind knew. You felt just how sickeningly still the body was beneath you. 

The lab door squeaked open. There was a soft, shuttered gasp. Quick low heeled footsteps and a hand gripped into your shirt at your back. Tears welled at the corner of your eyes. 

“What happened here?” Moira’s voice was careful, unnaturally gentle as she grabbed you by both shoulders in an attempt to lift you. Body uncooperative you fell against her, sliding off the chest you were sitting on crashing into her lanky body. A scared whine escaped you and she couldn’t catch you before your body fell heavy to hers, bringing her down with you to the floor. As you landed, something splashed back at you. Hands splashed in a pool that reeked of blood, your stomach shook and you tried to curl your body in on itself squeezing your eyes tighter. 

Shock does terrible things to the body.  

“Shh. Keep your eyes closed.” Her voice was shaking just as much as your hands. She was trying to lift you but your body refused to unglue itself from the ground. “Listen to me now, I need you to take a few breaths and push yourself up. You have to get up.”

Your eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the bright lab lights and the brilliant red pooling at your fingers over the shiny floor. You stared down and watched a sweat dripped from your forehead to slowly spreading blood, your whole body felt like it was drenched in sweat but all you felt was cold to a point where you were almost shivering. As Moira tried to kneel next to you, tried to speak, your head was spinning and you couldn't focus. Her fingers landed on the side of your neck, pushing for your pulse as you eyed deep scratches that broke the skin on the tops of your thighs. A hand, a loving familiar hand laid still next to your knee with the palm facing up and your blood beneath his nails. 

For someone who had killed countless people, reprogrammed too many omnics to name, destroyed lives and families, ruined villages and towns who thrived only because of Talon's support- death should not have affected you like this. 

"Can you tell me what happened?" Moira's voice sounded so distant to you, the fingers at your neck fell to your hand resting over it as a tiny act of comfort.    

Your body was screaming, but your mind lost the ability to speak. Once again, unable to talk but this time only at your own doing. Your eyes trailed up his arm, following smeared blood to an open gash at his throat and the distant look on his face. He was completely stilled, endless eyes open and staring at the ceiling as dried tears stuck to the sides of his face. The bullet wound he was recovering from had torn open the stitches, likely from falling out of his chair when you rushed him. Panic was gone. Numb shock had set in only to leave you wordless, to take away your ability to breathe.

In his rare moment of weakness, in your steadily growing moments of mania, you killed Gabriel Reyes. You stared at his body, at his mangled corpse in the horrible silence of the lab beyond a state of disbelief. All the time he spent fearing he’d kill you, the hours he'd send you away from him knowing the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you seemed useless now. The writing on the wall of how your life was going to end seemed set in stone the moment you chose to forgive him for wrapping hands around your throat, it was writing you'd been chipping away at without ever realizing. 

You killed him. You murdered him. He was dead at your fucking hands and there was absolutely no one else to blame. 

"He's dead." You breathed out, mouth burning with the salt of tears. Your senses were finally hitting you again, the ability to move, the pain where he'd dug into your thighs, the aching in your fingers from wrapping around Genji's blade. "Moira- Moira, he's dead."        

“Why did you kill him?" She was whispering, mismatched eyes searching yours as her hands moved to hold your face and force you to look at her. 

"I-I didn't. I didn't want to-" None of this was real, it couldn't be. "I was just having a bad dream-"

"Your night terrors. I never anticipated they would cause you to react like this." She looked to your arm, to the veins she'd once stuck needles in to make you stronger. "I should have been following up with you, unchecked I knew there could be repercussions. Hallucinations, psychosis- I've failed you. I should have realized sooner you were unwell." 

"I don't feel good." You pleaded with her. You felt clammy, nauseous, on the verge of tears but absolutely unable to bring yourself to cry.

"I’ll take care of this. I'll take care of you." Her arm circled beneath yours, wrapping at your waist and finally able to help you to your feet. Your legs wobbled, too shaken to stand on their own and you stumbled at her side all the way back to the chair in the corner you should have been sitting in the whole time. "I just need you to stay here for a moment.” 

While she rifled through her cabinets and rotated fridges full of colorful serums you stared at Gabe. There was an uneasiness about his death. Black eyes lingered but smoke was gone. Between the reopened bullet wound and your handiwork at his neck he'd bled out more than you'd ever seen anyone bleed in your life. It didn't feel real. Gabriel Reyes deserved to go out in fighting glory fighting to his last breath, or peacefully sleeping next to you after a lifetime together becoming old and gray. Every fiber of your being refused to believe the reality before your eyes. Any moment he'd burst into smoke, he'd stand again and make you laugh for scaring you so bad. He'd put on his Reaper mask and chase you around the base ready to blow it sky high just like you planned. 

Moira was silent as she brought thick metal cuffs around your wrist, latching your arm to the chair in your moment of contemplative refusal. 

"Just in case." Her voice was so sad, almost like she was betraying you by even doing it but you knew it was for the better. She had vials in her coat pocket, gloves pulling on over her long fingers. Her lab coat, white pants, her tie, they were all smeared with Gabe's blood after you'd tried to push yourself against her. She must be terrified of you, and the last thing you could do was blame her. "Are you alright with me sedating you?"    

"Please." You almost begged her under your breath. 

She gently positioned your arm open to her, waiting with the needle just against your vein. You searched for any signs that you were still dreaming, anything to tell you this wasn't your reality now. Her wide eyes and terrifying purple veins taking over her face offered no relief, only patience until you nodded your head that you were ready to be put under. As her drugs pumped into your blood you stared at the lifeless body of the man you loved. He looked far too strong to kill, even as he laid there dead. 

* * *

Days following the death of Gabriel Reyes felt empty. Moira hid his body in the small morgue at the back of the medical wing safe away from wondering agents who were looking for their fearless leader. 

You hid the truth behind an old Talon mask you scratched paint off of, dodging questions about where he was, why no one had heard from him, why no one was allowed in the labs anymore. Your orders were becoming frantic, chaotic without his helpful guidance. Talon agents were shipped off with care packages and large bank accounts to remote locations in exchange for silence. Amélie was sent away with a small team of agents to protect her on her own, returning to a family home on a small island off the coast of France. You were anxiously awaiting the confirmation that the building was fully rigged with explosives. 

News stories ran with pictures of your face, of Gabe's face, your real names attached to Lightning and Reaper with global warnings that you were wanted by almost every major crime agency in the world. People knew you, rumors about your relationship with Morrison and you being a spy all along surfaced story after story. 

Those days you were unearthly calm and making bold decisions.  even so much as to publicly taunt Overwatch by flying their flag above the Talon base. You'd destroyed Gabe and you in turn were self-destructing. 

Moira found you three nights after you'd plunged a knife into Gabe's throat, staring at his unmarked cubby holding your arms close to your body in the freezing morgue room.   

"You are only torturing yourself by coming down here." She was trying to be patient with you, trying to give you room to grieve but she saw all the signs of you falling back to your unhealthy ways. Unimpressed by her observation, you chose to ignore her. "Since you let so many of the agents go in such a short amount of time you effectively made yourself wait longer for everything to be ready. I have word they'll be ready to light the fuse in two days, you should begin packing and making preparations for what you'd like to do with his body."   

"I don't need to do anything, I'm going to stay on base. A captain going down with their ship kind of situation, you know?" You looked to her, eyes burning from lack of sleep. 

"Do you understand what you just said?" There was a sharpness in her voice, an anger that you would imply you had no plans to make it out of this without Gabe. "We all make mistakes, people die. You don't get to give up just because it was someone you love this time. He would not want you to be moping around like this, you and I both know he wanted a much better life for you after Talon." 

"I ruined my only chance at having a life after Talon." You snapped at her. "I can't escape on my own, I'm a good agent but I know my limits and I know I'll be caught. Morrison won't rest until he catches me, and I refuse to be locked up for the rest of my life." 

"Don't be foolish-" 

"Do you think there's a chance he could regenerate?" You cut her off, intently staring at the handle of his cubby that locked his corpse behind it. "This idea, it's been eating away at me. Morrison survived a fucking explosion, didn’t you see the scars he had? Maybe it just takes them longer to heal, or-”

“If super soldiers were immortal we would have known by now.” She crossed her arms, hair fell to cover her forehead as she rolled her lips almost annoyed that you would even suggest it. 

“It's unfair that Morrison would survive that and Gabe can't live through what I did to him." You were angry. So bitterly angry. 

“The implications of super soldiers regenerating even after death is impossible. There would be bodies trapped in coffins constantly suffocating to death, people who had been cremated that could have lived returned to their families. Do you understand the horrific repercussions there would be if any of those soldiers could have survived their deaths? It’s not impossible, it's irresponsible to think such things. Don’t be ridiculous.” 

You opened your mouth only to snap towards the door as you heard heavy running down the halls coming your direction. You snapped on your tempory mask, shaking as you waited for an agent to appear in the doorway. 

"I'm so sorry to interrupt, I know agents are no longer allowed in this area, but Lightning we have a major issue.” He kept his stance but sweat was rolling down the side of his forehead, eyes searching with deep questions why he'd found two of the leaders of Talon in the morgue wing. “It’s Overwatch. Agents are gathering at a safehouse on the border of the city, we’ve counted over fifty of them so far.” 

“They’re going to attack us here.” You stated in disbelief. Of course Morrison was going to attack now, he was going to bring you to justice even if that meant breaking down the front doors. You scoffed. He should have ignored international sanctions and just done this years ago, maybe then you wouldn’t be in this mess. “How many people do we have left on base?” 

“Just around twenty, not including yourself, Reaper or Dr. O’Deorain.” 

“You and the lieutenants gather everyone and get them out of here. I’ll have final checks sent to their accounts in addition to some money to support them until they can find new work.” You stared at him, paying off those you couldn’t reprogram seemed like just about the only thing left you could do now that Overwatch was closing in. “Don’t worry, you’ll get paid too, but I’ll need you and the lieutenants to keep us safe during our escape before we blow the base.” 

“Of course.” He turned on his feet, only to pause and look back at you. “Forgive me, it’s not my place to ask, but what are you doing down here-” 

“You’re right. It’s not your place to ask.” You shouldered past him. “Follow my orders. We’re either going to blow the base with you on it, or you can have a fat bank account and be miles away. Keep asking questions and it will be the former." 

"Understood." His voice shook.

Putting on this persona was taking everything from you. All you wanted to do was sit down and cry, to let out every high-strung emotion of having Gabe’s blood on your hands. No one else knew, your agents none the wiser that their terrifying leader laid beneath a white sheet in the morgue at the end of the hall in the lab wing. Gabriel Reyes, _Reaper_ , put to death judged only by your mind as the judge, jury, and executioner for his crimes that you projected onto him. He wasn’t completely innocent, that much is true, but he deserved to go out in any other way than a moment of weakness looking into the eyes of the woman he loved and never gave up on.

He did exactly as you directed as you paced with anger in the room you once shared with Gabe. It felt empty. It wasn't fair. He was supposed to be here.

You did this.

You did this.

 _You_ did this. 

Your breathing was picking up. He should be the one alive, he should be one giving orders. This was his story and you cut it short, you'd taken him so far from the path he should have been on there was no chance you could ever forgive yourself for it. Completely alone with it, emotions stacking down on you crushing you beneath their weight and twisting around your stomach with guilt, you screamed into his balled up shirts. Angry ugly cries blaming the world and Morrison and Moira for forcing your hand into making you the monster your nightmares always knew you would be. 

Everything about this was wrong. Moira's words bounced around in your skull mocking you that he would never live again. You felt paranoid, nervous of being around her now that she knew your plan. The last thing you wanted was for her to stop you, to be unconscious in her lab strapped to the chair as you slept then only to wake miles from the base and hearing about your hard work completing with you. She was sneaky, she would do something like that. She always wanted to protect you, to keep you safe from even yourself but she knew she was the instigator, she knew she was your beginning, the one that made you delirious enough to run into the arms of a lunatic falling apart- 

It was like the sun broke through the clouds. A realization of your only real option. You didn't have to die with the explosion. You didn't have to give yourself to Overwatch or live life on the run. 

Moira was your beginning. Moira was going to be your end. You would force her hand, make her finish what she started. She could keep you alive, you could forget this soul-crushing guilt. Both of you could win. 

Uncaring about your mask, leaving behind armor and weapons, even your shoes, you ran to her room. Every beat of your feet against the hall floors screamed her name, your heart raced with a panic you were finally allowing yourself to completely feel. Gabe had taught you to control your emotions, to contain them in a way that benefited everyone. Now, this was different. You quickly allowed yourself to get lost in it, to let every nerve fry with despair, to freely allow your eyes to become almost too watery to see from. Suppressing your emotions from killing him as a trick you'd pulled too long and you were going to let Moira see the brunt of it. 

Your knocks at her door were rapid, hard enough to almost bruise your knuckles before her door flew open and you fell forward towards her frantic expression. You dropped to your knees, skin scraping against the rough carpet of her room and you sunk to the floor grabbing at her ankles. You were a broken inconsolable mess, beyond anything she’d ever seen before and you were breaking down her cold exterior to glimmers of concern and horror.  

“I can’t- I can't do this- I can’t do any of this without him." You sobbed, chest tightening cutting off your ability to take deep breaths. "I’ve lost everyone because of what I’ve become, I don’t have a life any more- I- I can’t do this, please Moira, please I can’t live with myself. I’m too dangerous, I’ll kill you too-” 

"You are stronger than you realize." She lowered to a knee with you on the floor, running a hand through your hair. 

"You don't understand!" You wailed at her. "I'm fucking ruined! Please- fuck, there's no way out of this. There's no scenario where I can just give myself a new identity and live in peace. Someone will recognize me, someone will know- so-someone will-"

"Please, calm down, you're only riling yourself up more."  

"There's only one option." You snapped, lips quivering at the thought of following through. 

“If you’re asking me to euthanize you that is completely out of the question-” 

“No.” You sucked in air through gritted teeth, grabbed at Moira's hands and held them tightly in your own. “I once asked you to make me not feel anything. That’s what I want, that’s the only way I can survive this.”

“Absolutely not-”

“I want you to reprogram me.” Your brows were stitched together, a stoic stare of seriousness shook her to the core. “I don’t want to feel anything ever again. I can't live with myself knowing what I've done to Gabe, or what I've done to Max, to anyone. I don’t want to remember anyone or anything. Leave me blank and let Overwatch have me, you can disappear and I’ll be the scapegoat, I’ll be the one who gets caught.” 

“You have completely lost your mind.” Her head was shaking no. “I could reprogram a thousand people, but I could never do it to you.” 

Moira had never looked so distraught. She looked _afraid_ of you, of what you did. Your hair hung over your eyes, greasy and matted almost on par with that of a wild animal, you were sure she could still smell blood soaked to your skin- you swore you could still smell it even days later. Squaring your shoulders and taking in a deep breath the shuttered your chest you looked her straight in the eyes and stood tall, no longer intimidated by her own towering stature or the fear of being alone. 

“Then I’ll do it myself.” You threatened with a cracking voice. 

You could break into her lab, her door code likely wouldn’t be that hard to either figure out or hack. You ran faster than her, you could beat her there and lock her out. You'd watched her do it enough, you could guess which serums she was using if you had to lock yourself in there and complete it on your own. She sucked in a sharp breath and reached out to stop you, but there was nothing she would be able to do to catch you in time. All too confident in your own abilities, you took off running at your full speed darting through the halls and slipping around corners, skipping steps down the emergency staircases all the way to her lab at the back of the base. 

You were frantic, mind blurred but sharp on your mission. Overwatch can have you, but you’d made damn sure they couldn’t have all of you.

Moira was screaming your name in panic as she chased after you. Part of you almost wanted to run to the morgue to tell Gabe about your new brilliant plan, to tell him all about how you outsmarted your own inescapable feelings, but your heart sank when you realized he wouldn't respond to your morbid plan. Your hands were shaking at her keypad, typing every code you could think of. Her quick steps were echoing down the emergency stairs, closing in on you fast. At the pace you were typing codes in, you'd lock yourself out and have to break down the entire door. Rejection after rejection lit only to finally reward you with a happy beep as you entered the year she graduated with her doctorate degree. 

You slammed the door behind you and went straight to the rows of cabinets hiding rows and rows of temperature controlled serums behind them. She always went for the one on the far right first, always pulled a dark purple vial that glimmered against the fluorescent lights as if it had glitter in it. You snarled as you opened the cabinet to search through for the right one. If only you were an omnic, then you'd know exactly what you were doing. 

Beeps sung out at the door, Moira typing in her code faster than you could figure out which shade of purple was the right one. You were kicking yourself for never looking at the number codes on the side, for never watching closer. You felt feral, greedy as you grabbed at anything you could and stole it away in your arms as she burst through the doors to sprint at you. You screeched as she lunged at you, knocking you off your unsteady feet to the floor where vials flew to the floor and shattered around you. Trying desperately to hang onto anything you could, she grabbed the only surviving one from your hand and held it far into the air with her long arms, high enough that you were struggling to reach it like a child having their toy taken away.

You looked wild, she finally broke her stoic facade and stared at you with the most emotion you had ever seen from her. There was a moment of absolute silence where it seemed like neither of you breathed, where she grabbed you by the chin and forced you to look in her eyes, forced you to bear yourself to her completely. She searched your tear filled eyes for earnest intent, for the pleas of a broken woman who would not give up until you got what you wanted.  

“Do you truly believe this is what you need?” Her brows were twisted in concern, voice shaking. “To be unable to feel anything. To forget everyone and everything that has brought you to this point, to even not know who _I_ am? You are trying to kill yourself without ending your life. Gabriel would never, are you listening to me? Never want you to do this to yourself.”

"It doesn't matter what Gabe would have wanted now." You blinked out tears, tears that rolled down your cheeks and onto her fingertips as your nostrils flared. "If I can't remember anything, you, Max, Amélie, anyone, then I can't implicate them if I'm caught. Please let me do this." 

"Do not pretend you are doing this for my sake." She was snarling, but you watched as her lips quivered with a sadness you'd never seen on her face. "This is purely selfish. You don't think you're capable of dealing with your own emotions." 

“You're right." You breathed, allowing your chest to rise and fall with heavy breaths. "Please. I only trust you to do it.”

That was all you managed to whisper before your head fell heavy into her palm. Her hand slipped from your chin to the back of your head, pulling you to her shoulder where your face rolled wet cheeks against her pristine undershirt. You could feel her body shaking, trying to hang onto the control of telling you no, but her long nails were digging into your scalp as you cried, and cried, and cried against her. You balled fists in the back of her shirt, holding her in place. If she didn't do it, you'd do it yourself. If you couldn't do it, you'd force one of your lieutenants to do it- Moira was silently running down the list of options for what you would do if she refused.   

“I told you I would never experiment on you again.” Her voice was shaking. "You're asking me to do the one thing I never wanted to do again." 

"I know. I'm sorry. It's not fair to you." Your face burned from crying too much, eyes terribly bloodshot as you pulled away from her. 

She stayed with her knees to the floor as you slowly stood and straightened your clothes, stepping towards her operating chair. Even as you turned on the machines around it, activating the electric shock station she remained on the ground staring the vial in her palm. There was a lingering calm that filled the room as you made yourself comfortable in her chair. You had all the time in the world now, able to wait patiently for your tears to dry and for her to gather herself enough to do her job. When she stood, she wouldn't look at you. Her body was stiff as she opened and closed cabinet after cabinet. You were steadying your arm on the rest as she was methodically placing vials and needles on a rolling table at your side. Her face was stoic, jaw tightly grinding, she was letting her hair fall in front of her eyes so you wouldn’t see tears welling at the corners. 

"If you just sedate me, then I'll order them to blow the base and take you out with me." You threatened half-heartedly.

"There's no need for that." She spoke softly over her shoulder as she circled her lab coat on. "I'm going to do what you asked me to. You have been a great friend to me, someone who I know I should have cherished more and I know I have not always done right by you. I promise to you that this will be the last time I reprogram."

She sat in a rolling stool at your side, closing in on your arm with a numbing wipe that stained your skin. You watched in silence, eyes heavy with guilt as she prepared your arm for the first injection. Unsteady hands connected the first vial with a long thin needle, she looked it over against the light before bringing the end of it against you. There she paused, lifting her mismatched eyes to lock with yours, waiting for a final nod of permission. She was tightly holding her lips together as you looked over every last detail of her face for a final time.

Reprogramming humans was far less messy than omnics. Omnics you had to tear them apart, spend hours unscrewing and running programs on motherboards buried deep beneath oiled wires. Humans, it was a few injects and the right amount of electroshock in just the right places. It also took hours, it was laboring on the person performing the reprogramming, but it was far less taxing on the person whose mind was being erased. You’d feel cold, have shivers maybe, you knew that. You’d feel sleepy, maybe at some points feel your heart race as electricity surged through. With long nails resting on your skin, your breathing steadied. 

Your nod this time was a small succession of rapid but bearly there head bobs, lips straining with the overwhelming urge to cry. Her glistening eyes dropped to the center of your arm and the needle sank beneath skin. 

Purple slowly pushed into your veins. After the first injection, she dropped the empty syringe to the floor where the glass shattered and she stared at you with unnervingly caring eyes with nothing left to say. Under your skin you felt a rush of warmth like a blanket, then an overwhelming cold shiver before she rested her hand over yours and moved to cover her mouth as if she was going to be sick. A woozy feeling was overcoming you, a spinning in your mind almost as if you were about to pass out. 

You'd ruined Morrison's life. You'd taken Gabe's. Maybe this was a cowardly way to deal with your own choices, but it was your choices that got you here and you were choosing to never have to remember the sorrow on Gabe's face in his final moments again.  

“Thank you, Moira.” You whispered with a voice so horse you couldn’t even recognize it as your own. “You’re my best friend.” 

She refused to speak, lips pressed together in a tight line before she leaned back with her face dropped to her hand, long thin fingers covering a mouth begging to scream with words unspoken. There was a tingling in the tips of your fingers, at the ends of your toes, a numbness that was slowly spreading through your bloodstream bringing you to a weightless calm. Finally content with your choices, you were completely free. It had been a long, _long_ time since you’d felt such a deep sense of peace.

* * *

Bright light. 

Buzzing of fluorescents above gathered your attention as a foggy mind focused on a colorless world around you. A woman in a stark white lab coat, tall, so tall you had to lift your eyes to see her head, stood facing away from you leaned heavy on a counter. Her sleeves were rolled to her elbows, one arm seemed sickly and deeply covered in veins. A trashcan to her side and a bottle of generic headache pills with a knocked over cup of water to the other spilled over open notebooks with pages torn and crumpled to the floor. She refused to turn around and look at you even though you were pretty sure you were asking her where you were, but your head was pounding too loud to tell if you were really speaking. Your mouth was dry, tongue sticking to the roof of it with every word you thought you spoke. 

You could hear something over the sound of the buzzing, the sound of distant emergency alarms and some sort of heavy knocking on the door that sounded familiar but you couldn’t quite place why. Over her shoulder, the tall woman in the lab coat called out with a face that read of anger but there were tears in her eyes falling down over her cheeks. Her hair was greasy, almost like she'd been awake for days. The knocking became frantic and her shouts were distant in your ears as she seemingly refused to open the door. 

Ignoring the commotion, you lifted your hands to your face. The skin on the backs ran with dark veins in honeycomb formations, your wrist twisted this way and that, eyes processing the sight of old scars from your left wrist following up your arm that you couldn’t quite remember, nor did you particularly care to. What a strange sensation it was, to be looking at a body you knew was your own but felt completely foreign. 

The knocking was getting heavier, a deep voice outside now bellowing, but all sounded muffled to you. The woman froze to look at the door, then to you, her tear stained cheeks drying as you watched an expression of panic wash over her. 

 _'That’s impossible.’_ Her mouth moved but you could barely cling on to the words she spoke. 

The ground felt like it was shaking. She scrambled backward, knocking over an array of things across the counter as she fell to the back of the room. You didn’t flinch when the door burst open, no reaction to a goliath of a man kicking in the door sending it off its hinges to the ground and clattering down at your feet. Some kind of siren was echoing through the halls, lights flashing at even intervals- you didn't know normal, but you knew that wasn't it. A man in worse condition than you were in stumbled into the room directly towards you, stark naked and bloated with fresh stitches you stared at the Y incision across his chest, another wound haphazardly closed looked half torn open. At his throat a gnarly wound had been stapled shut, his skin deeply bruised- far worse than anything around the other stitches in his body. 

You stared in morbid curiosity, he had these horrible black eyes with burning light centers that made you feel a strange pang in the bottom of your stomach. His eyes, although horrifying, felt like they were reading into yours like a book, you watched back almost as if you were observing a wild animal as he lowered to his knees in front of you and placed hands colder than your own body over your exposed thighs, fingers touching healing scars of obvious scratch marks. Big hands slid up your arm, twisting it carefully exposing an array of bruises on the inside of your elbow, the closer your veins were to the bruising the darker they became. He was speaking, something angry it seemed from his twisted expression, his face snapping to the woman shaking in the corner of the room.

They were having some sort of argument, that much you could understand, but you still couldn't hear clearly. You were straining to pop your ears, to clear them of pressure in your head as they shouted at one another and the man gripped his fingers on your legs. Above you, the fluorescent lights dangling from the ceiling jolted along with a sharp movement of the room. Something not far from where you were was being blown open. Unbothered by the chaos of an impending attack, you circled your jaw, twisting it this way and that in an attempt to ease the block at your ears.    

 _There._ Once you could hear again the world became almost too loud.     

"I should kill you right now for doing this to her!" The man in front of you was screaming at the woman in the lab coat, his nostrils flaring with intense anger. Your head leaned to the side to watch him react in such an extreme way. 

"As if you would be one to talk." She shot back, slamming a cabinet closed. Running was heading your direction, metal hitting linoleum floors and worried voices muffled through helmets. 

"Why would you ever-" The man's shouting paused as a group of heavily armored men stopped at the door and stared at the strange scene. 

"We need to evacuate now- sir, there you are! You're naked? I-" The man shook his head, eyes bouncing between the man at your feet, the woman behind you, and at you with horror. "What happened in here? Ah, no we don't have time. Sir, Overwatch is here! Director Morrison has already blown the front gates, if they plan on using explosives then they're going to explode the whole place. We need to move now! We can't hold all of them off for long!"

"Then put yourself to use and get on the front line!" He growled at them.   

They responded with a chorus of agreeance. As the men in masks carrying heavy weapons ran back into the halls to stop an incoming attack of enemies, the man with the black and burning eyes hurried to lift you, cradling you in his arms. Unsure what else to do, what your orders were, you complied with being held in such a childish way and stared up to the healing wound at his neck. 

"Do not take her!" The woman yelled, smashing down a vial sending a ball of some type of gas into the air. 

"I'd like to see you try to stop me." His anger practically radiated off him, even with his freezing cold skin, the way his hands held you all too tight told you he was protecting you from something, or someone. "Good luck fighting off Overwatch, doc. If they don't send this place to hell you better watch your back because I won't let you live with what you've done." 

"Gabriel!" She screamed after him as he pushed through the broken down doorway and started in a sprint. 

You bounced against his chest as he ran, your eyes stared blankly unfocused, not caring at the sounds of shouting and gunfire closing in around you. Gabriel. That must be this man's name. Weird name. What was yours again? 

Thought drifted in an out with every unfamiliar passageway and glance at standoffs of agents through windows to a large courtyard. As the air around you periodically turned to black, your gaze would shift to scared agents ducking out of the way as the man sprinted with you in the opposite direction they were going, he never broke a sweat or even huffed once all the way to a dark empty airfield. His burning eyes would periodically look down to you, catching you staring at the hole in his throat, or the way his facial hair perfectly framed his lips. Somewhere far away there was distant shouting, commands being drowned out but shots popping off told you there had to be some sort of battle to death happening. Gabriel saved you, there was danger and he got you out of there. Gabriel was a good guy.    

He hurried into a plane, a tiny matte black dropship and struggled with the door until he brought you into a small cabin. The smell was familiar, old metal worn down with rain that reminded you of shadowy memories from another person. He was frantic as he placed you on fold out cot. Although there were attackers on their way, shouting getting closer and closer, he took a moment to ensure you were comfortable, circling a blanket over your shoulders and tucking it around you even though you certainly didn’t feel cold- you didn't feel anything. Now he was breathing heavy as he ran to the controls and light panels powered on, outside you heard rushing footsteps and shouting echoing off the sides of the plane. 

Someone on the outside, loud over speakers was threatening to open fire if the plane took off. 

"Hold on to something!" He yelled back at you.

Something triggered in your mind to follow his command, you gripped tight to the edge of the cot as the plane lifted into the sky. Deafeningly loud noises struck the bottom of the plane, gunshot after gunshot ricocheting off the metal siding while he made a quick escape. You held tighter as the plane almost threw you from your seat accelerating so quickly. You turned to look through the windshield, the plane seemed almost like it was climbing straight up in the air, pointed directly at rumbling gray storm clouds. It was surreal, watching as the nose of the plane pushed through the sky breaking apart dark clouds, shaking as it flew higher and higher, higher until it broke free from the clouds and blinding sunshine filled the cabin.

You sat there, swaying with the motions just watching him adjusting things that the pilot's station. The world in black and white seemed so clear, you could see every movement he made, read the tiny print beneath screens even from a distance away. He enabled a masking system, then grabbed a headset wired to the front panel only to rip it from the station with only his strength. He did the same for the copilot's headset and landed a fist on what looked like some sort of communication panel. He sat still for a long while, facing away from you, dark shadows of him and the chair stretching long into the plane cabin. Unable to keep track of time, you sat there with eyes to a white sky until the man, Gabriel, set the plane steady and stood, only to stomp past you to the back where he pulled out unmarked clothes from hidden drawers. Dark sweatpants, just a regular tshirt, he brought them over his body as he watched you just sitting there. 

You watched him too. Eyes following as he paced back and forth in front of you, fixated on your eyes with every turn of his heels. Once he seemed to gather his thoughts, he carefully kneeled in front of you and his thumbs pushed beneath the edges of the blanket at your knees to hold your legs gingerly where deep scratch marks laid. The white light was bright against the deep black shadows it created over the metal roof of the plane and you distracted yourself with the shadows as he invaded your growing sense of personal space.    

“Do you know your name?” The stranger was touching you with intimacy but you felt nothing, not even empathy when he curled his lips tight and looked to the ground with watering eyes at your unresponsiveness.

You blinked and squinted at him. The longer you looked around the more you realized your world was gradually becoming vibrant- starting with those burning circles in the center of his eyes. They were bright red, an empty red contrast hard against endless black. Instead of dancing your eyes to the shadows, you looked around the plane for other colors to experience, blinking yellow buttons, bright blue sky, soft tan on the blanket, a sickeningly blue tint to your skin. A large hand lifted to cup your cheek, cold calloused thumb rubbing gently at the edge of your jaw refocusing your gaze from the plane to him.

The scar in the center of his neck was horrifying. Dark and stapled together haphazardly there were strings of skin trying to heal together creating an almost weblike pattern. Curiosity overtook you, a hand reached for his throat, fingertips landing directly over the wound. You pushed at it, feeling the strange sensation of soft muscle just beneath smooth skin. Your fingers played over the valleys and hills of the stitches at his throat, it was just so _ugly_. His face stayed stunned for a moment, only a moment, before sinking to a lip chewing sadness and he laid his hand over yours to squeeze gently. 

“You don’t remember what you did?” His voice was soft, but it cracked. 

You abruptly pulled your hand away understanding you were upsetting him by touching him this way. The man, Gabriel his name was _Gabriel_ , sighed deep from his chest, leaning forward and holding either side of your head as he placed a long kiss at the top of your forehead. It was strange but warm and it made you smile.    

“It’s okay.” He looked exceedingly worried, his hands shook as he moved hair from your eyes and kissed once more at your forehead before dropping to meet your eyes. His large hand rested at the base of your neck, thumb rubbing small careful circles at your throat. “We can go home now.”     

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to the incredible people who stuck it out with me through the AU/to anyone who reads in the future!! Your support and love has meant the absolute world to me and the only reason I am able to write so much because of you guys! (´༎ຶ ͜ʖ ༎ຶ `)♡  
> Tumblr holds secret side stories, [check out the master list for JFM/GFR! ](https://hostilewitness-ao3.tumblr.com/tagged/side-story-master-post)  
> 


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